Title:Italics

Pairing:Lavi/Kanda, Allen, Tiki, Cross

Rating:R for language and sexuality

Disclaimer:DGM belongs to Hoshino Katsura et al

A/N:High School AU; partly cowritten with cesia on LJ.

&

[Friday]

kanda_not_yuu is available (6:35 PM)

thebookthief: MUNCH MUNCH

thebookthief: YUUUUU

thebookthief: I'M MUNCHING AND YOU'RE NOT PAYIN ATTENTION

kanda_not_yuu: ....why would I pay attention to that on AIM?

thebookthief: cuz it's what i'm munching on. YUU.

thebookthief: D:

kanda_not_yuu: ....on AIM.

kanda_not_yuu: tch.

thebookthief: yes. this is highly probable.

thebookthief: and possible. cuz i have made it so.

kanda_not_yuu: you're an idiot.

thebookthief: an idiot that you macked on last night. ohoooo~

kanda_not_yuu: stfu

thebookthief: why~

thebookthief: ARE YOU IN DENIAL AGAIN

kanda_not_yuu: because you don't make sense and you're annoying

thebookthief: hey, i make sense of the word sense

thebookthief: don't knock it

thebookthief: but you can knock me all ya want~

kanda_not_yuu: ...

kanda_not_yuu: i don't get you

thebookthief: so yeah, uh, come over

thebookthief: i'm kinda bored, gramps is out doing what old guys do, and i have nobody to play with.

kanda_not_yuu: i'm not your playmate

thebookthief: UNLESS YOU'RE GONNA FALL ASLEEP ON ME AGAIN -

kanda_not_yuu: ....I just might

thebookthief: whatcha taaalking about. you'll always be my playmate.

thebookthief: btw, i'm sorry i ripped your sweater.

thebookthief: bring that over so i can fix it for ya.

thebookthief: er, honest.

kanda_not_yuu: .................what.

thebookthief: errrr

kanda_not_yuu: Why do you have it in the first place?!

thebookthief: i kinda ripped it last night, i just didn't say

thebookthief: but hey, it's your fault, if it makes things easier for you

kanda_not_yuu: ...

thebookthief: honest

kanda_not_yuu: You piece of---

thebookthief: *n*!

kanda_not_yuu: No, YOU get HERE and fix it. THIS INSTANT.

thebookthief: okay. i'll bring snacks.

kanda_not_yuu: you get any on my floor and you'll clean it up. on your own.

thebookthief: can i use your greatest sewing kit known to mankind?

thebookthief: the one we must never speak of~

kanda_not_yuu: ....

thebookthief: okay okayyyy i won't get jizz on your floor again -

kanda_not_yuu: ...............................

kanda_not_yuu: WOULD YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT THOSE THINGS IN CHAT. I hate that word.

thebookthief: WHY

thebookthief: DO WE HAVE AN AUDIENCE

thebookthief: DO YA WANT ONE :D?

kanda_not_yuu: JUST BECA-- NO

thebookthief: SRSLY

thebookthief: cuz allen is over here. and he won't leave.

thebookthief: he keeps readin over my shoulder.

kanda_not_yuu: then i'm not going over there

thebookthief: nono, i'm going over THERE

thebookthief: allen's goin home RIGHT NOW

kanda_not_yuu: tch

thebookthief: he's just an annoying beanie. a beanie bunny. a bunny bean. er, which sounds better? a beanie baby?

kanda_not_yuu: …

thebookthief: he says he is very privy to the ways of wily men

thebookthief: i'm... not exactly SURE i follow, but ya know

kanda_not_yuu: i don't care what he says

thebookthief: oho he sure cares what YOU say~

thebookthief: he says that he will tell all the girls in school so that they will stop flocking to you like pigeons. you scare them off anyway.

kanda_not_yuu is away(6:49 PM)

CAN'T YOU READ YOU PUNKASS BOOKWORM

thebookthief: DDD:

kanda_not_yuu is away(6:50 PM)

CAN'T YOU READ YOU PUNKASS BOOKWORM

thebookthief: quoting lily allen, kanda! it's not fair, and i think you're really mean!!! (it's me allen btw!)

kanda_not_yuu is away(6:52 PM)

CAN'T YOU READ YOU PUNKASS BOOKWORM

kanda_not_yuu is available (6:57 PM)

kanda_not_yuu: ...tell them about what?

thebookthief: er. wut.

thebookthief: DON'T CONFUSE ME LIKE THAT YUU

thebookthief: YOU'LL GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK YOU WILL

kanda_not_yuu: what

kanda_not_yuu: I don't know what the hell you're going on about!

thebookthief: i forgot! i'm supposed to COME over. whoops.

thebookthief: allen's got my attention all to himself~ it looks like i'll be spendin the week with him again.

kanda_not_yuu: good. Leave me be.

thebookthief: didja fix your sweater yet?

kanda_not_yuu: No, because YOU'RE going to do that

thebookthief: and howww do ya want me to do that?

thebookthief: btw i'm REVISING this so allen won't get the bestest idea~

kanda_not_yuu: ...

thebookthief: you know.

kanda_not_yuu: what

thebookthief: YOU KNOW.

thebookthief: HEY I'M SUPPOSED TO BE COMIN OVER I FORGOT AAHAHHHHH I'M SUCH A FREAK

kanda_not_yuu: ....idiot

thebookthief: allen brought over those rum candies

thebookthief: he says he got them from charity

kanda_not_yuu: i don't care

thebookthief: but i am thiiiinking he stole them from some unsuspecting lady. or cross.

kanda_not_yuu: like hell

thebookthief: want some? he says i can take the rest -

kanda_not_yuu: haha--- no

thebookthief: yuu. did YOU already have some rum candies?

kanda_not_yuu: of course not, you idiot.

thebookthief: LIES

kanda_not_yuu: ...

thebookthief: OKAY SEE YA IN A FEW :DDDD hey wait, i needja to come pick me up.

kanda_not_yuu: why'

thebookthief: er, cuz it's dark out. and i don't wanna get molested

thebookthief: only YOU can do that. D:

kanda_not_yuu: ............

thebookthief: sigh. and allennnn.

thebookthief: pffff

thebookthief: you need to drop him off

thebookthief: he says pretty pls.

kanda_not_yuu: you can get here on your own. YOU HAVE FEET, YOU MORON.

kanda_not_yuu: ....

kanda_not_yuu: why do i have to

kanda_not_yuu: get your own damn car for once

thebookthief: because he says he doesn't wanna lose his innocence~ just yet.

kanda_not_yuu: ....i don't care about his "innocence"

thebookthief: oh you don't

kanda_not_yuu: tch

thebookthief: FINE HE'S JUST GONNA RUN HOME CRYIN

thebookthief: ALL CUZ OF YOU

thebookthief: i feel sorry for the little guy

kanda_not_yuu: ...

thebookthief: i also feel sorry for my ----

kanda_not_yuu: i don't

kanda_not_yuu: ....

thebookthief: i feel sorry for yours~

thebookthief: don'tcha want some?

kanda_not_yuu: shut up

kanda_not_yuu is offline (7:29 PM)

&

[Saturday]

NightWalker is available(10:35 AM)

thebookthief:hey bb, what's crackin'?

NightWalker:wrong window, lavi…

thebookthief:oh haha oopsy~

NightWalker:no you're not.

thebookthief:not what.

NightWalker:you are insufferable.

thebookthief:stop taking kanda's words out of his mouth. needin help with anything?

thebookthief:but all you do is take, but all you do is take~

NightWalker:*O* did you download her? *O*

thebookthief:lily allen? Yeah, i noticed her a long time ago, but since your little upstart yesterday, I got a hankerin for some o her.

NightWalker:*n*

thebookthief: *n*? don't be such a spoilsport.

NightWalker:it's just! It's really not okay, it's really not okay~

NightWalker:lavi?

NightWalker:lavi!

thebookthief:oh uh, I forget the words.

NightWalker:you're only fun when kanda's around.

NightWalker:let's just stay, let's just stay, I wanna lie in bed all daaaay

thebookthief:ARE YOU IMPLYING SOMETHING THERE

NightWalker:mmmaybeeee

thebookthief:allen, you need a girl.

NightWalker:um :EEEEE

thebookthief:ooo that's a new one. Really. Just sayin.

NightWalker::E!!! I'm already

thebookthief:already what? WUT. DON'T TELL ME :D?

NightWalker:no, well, i dunno. *n*

thebookthief:better hurry and get the girl, alby. Btw, I love your new sn. Didja get it just to piss kanda off?

thebookthief:in that case, HUGE STAMP OF LAVISCIOUS APPROVAL.

thebookthief:REALLY. SWEARS. Hey, didjoo cut out?

NightWalker:no, I'm still here.

NightWalker:it's just

NightWalker:first of all, I am in no uncertain terms ALBY. T_T that's absolutely dreadful. Alby.

thebookthief:let me interrupt ya. Alby the ALBINO. You deserve it after all.

NightWalker:MY hair. *n* it was an accident.

thebookthief:no no, mon bon ami. Accident would be you falling into a vat of bleach solution. Not voluntarily doing it to yourself.

NightWalker:does it really look that bad?

thebookthief:well, considering I didn't say anything YESTERDAY when I shoulda… it's not THAT bad.

NightWalker:indeed.

thebookthief: compared to what lenalee had tried to do to kanda's prized possession in the days of yore.

NightWalker: what?

thebookthief: :3

NightWalker: _

NightWalker: I shouldn't ask. Anyhow. Secondly,

thebookthief: ALSO I think 'in no uncertain terms' would be a positive thing, said like that. Which would mean you ARE indeedalby.

NightWalker:I – lavi, surely you are wrong.

thebookthief:don't test me, little grasshopper, today is not a good day to get on my smart side.

NightWalker: secondly… whatever do you mean?

thebookthief: errrr

thebookthief: kanda put up a fight last night. He just won't give in.

NightWalker: I will refrain from calling you Gaylord. Oh, won't you look at that~

thebookthief: …I've taught you well, little grasshopper.

NightWalker: stop that!

thebookthief: well, yeah, truth be told, kanda is being a sourpuss. Without the puss, of course.

NightWalker: um

thebookthief: I AM SO DEPRIVED.

NightWalker: this is really none of my business, friend or foe. And kanda is definitely none of my business. We matched up in phys ed again today, and he totally smashed me!

thebookthief: ehhh?

NightWalker: he's a wicked brute! What's that word?

thebookthief: bastard?

NightWalker: no! I read it in a book recently. Actually, lenalee did, and then she passed the information onto me. She said it would be very helpful, according to her therapist. But in my opinion, I think her therapist is a – lurgy! Ah, I remembered. The name is perfect. Now where did she get it? I can't remember.

thebookthief: while you… go on about that, I'mma have me some jammy dodgers.

NightWalker: hey! oy? Lavi, you're a thug. Totally and completely.

thebookthief: y sank u.

NightWalker: ihu T_T

thebookthief: but I lo-o-ove you.

NightWalker: ilu2

thebookthief: better. i'm the one hooking you up with lenalee.

thebookthief: you there?

NightWalker: hardly. i'm having some jammy dodgers yummyyy

thebookthief: heyyy what a coincidenceeee

NightWalker: lavi, i got some out when you mentioned them.

thebookthief: don't spoil your dinner.

NightWalker: numnummies. glop glop jammy jammies!

thebookthief: … or mine. hey, any ideas?

NightWalker: for?

thebookthief: cough.

NightWalker: there is NO way, in NO uncertain terms, that I will help you, uh, have kanda. kanda can die is what I say!

NightWalker: oh all right, maybe not die, per se…

NightWalker: and don't say two negatives make a positive!

thebookthief: oho?

NightWalker: or that two wrongs make a right. You were thinking that, weren't you?

thebookthief: I wonder.

thebookthief: I have some advice for you, if ya wanna take it.

NightWalker: please don't.

thebookthief: LENALEE likes it when you poke her joints. Believe you me, she gets all… weak-kneed. LIKE A JELLO SHOT.

NightWalker: *n*

thebookthief: don't ask me how I know this. Just abide by this one rule.

NightWalker: are you somehow expecting repayment for this advice?

NightWalker: because I'm saying that I'm against the whole…

thebookthief: gay scene? Allen, are you comin' onto me.

NightWalker: well! You said jello shot. I just thought I'd act like it.

thebookthief: ilu so much, btw. Just so you know this, going into the crappy annals of life known as high school tomorrow.

NightWalker: but lavi, we don't call it that.

NightWalker: and don't think you're getting any advice out of me. I still hate kanda. you know what that lurgy did earlier?

thebookthief: actually, allen, that's a nice story n all, but I gotta go bb go~

kanda_not_yuu is available(12:35 PM)

thebookthief: MY KNIGHT IN SHINING – darkness

thebookthief: howsit going, babycakes?

kanda_not_yuu: the next time you call me that in public, you will never forget my fist in your face.

thebookthief: w-what are ya talking abooout

kanda_not_yuu: that horrendous 'b' word?

thebookthief: it's cute, c'mon, get with it

kanda_not_yuu: you. call lena that.

thebookthief: but

kanda_not_yuu: tch.

thebookthief: I am thinking that this may be my last day on earth as I know it, so please PLEASE HAVE SEX WITH ME.

kanda_not_yuu is offline(12:41 PM)

tikiroomMaster is available(4:50 PM)

thebookthief: oh master~

tikiroomMaster: oh hello, youth of today~

thebookthief: I need help

tikiroomMaster: amidst the time you spend weaving that web of yours?

thebookthief: that's the thing. I'VE FUCKED UP.

tikiroomMaster: now, as your teacher, you should not be using such foul language in my presence.

thebookthief: :/

tikiroomMaster: but as I am hardly your teacher, I shall let it pass. What's wrong, dear boy? Cat got your tongue?

thebookthief: i-in a way. HOW DID YOU KNOW.

tikiroomMaster: why, I am the Mikk. I know the darkest dealings of your very soul. Plus I am currently sipping away at my bottle of wine. Dear Mr Marian shall be visiting in a few.

thebookthief: that's the thing. I need help with, er, gay stuff.

tikiroomMaster: lavi, I may be a master, but I am not – wait a moment.

thebookthief: I'm … waiting? Look, man to man, kanda's giving me the evil eye.

tikiroomMaster: elaborate please~

thebookthief: just do not give him one of your lazy eyes in the corridor or anything?

tikiroomMaster: hm. Do you beg of me?

thebookthief: anything. Just don't let him know. He has stigma or something, toward this sorta thing.

tikiroomMaster: but?

thebookthief: it's just, recently I noticed he's bein SOMEWHAT ornery and I'm just left horny all over the place.

tikiroomMaster: is this over that sweater incident?

thebookthief: h-how didjoo…

tikiroomMaster: oh, dear dear boy.

tikiroomMaster: …I noticed when he wore the sweater in the corridor. He needs a better fashion sense.

thebookthief: take him to market, then. Just PLEASE HELP ME O MASTER HOW ART THOU.

tikiroomMaster: do you think I should take him to harrods?

thebookthief: D: mr mikk, you're killin me.

tikiroomMaster: all in good time, my dear boy. Oohh~ my guest has arrived.

thebookthief: LOG OFF

thebookthief: LOG OFF

thebookthief: LOG OFF

thebookthief: LOG OFF

tikiroomMaster: hello there, lavi bookman.

thebookthief: sigh. hello, mr marian

tikiroomMaster: nah uh uh.

thebookthief: halo, mr sonuva

thebookthief:gun.

tikiroomMaster: good boy.

thebookthief: didja read everything already?

tikiroomMaster: every last word. It's quite a tale you spin. You should write a book.

thebookthief: har har.

tikiroomMaster: now, no need to hate me so clearly, lavi. What's this about troubled gay men?

thebookthief: none of your bsns.

tikiroomMaster: oh? But I think it is, seeing as how I've stumbled upon your wreck of a relationship. I wouldn't even call it that.Fail.

thebookthief: f-fail. HEY.

tikiroomMaster: dear boy, this is your tiki again. Listen to my sound, sound advice: really push the envelope.

thebookthief: I – wut.

tikiroomMaster: Don't mind my drinking buddy here. He is a bit loopy already; I promise to see him to an AA program. As for you, don't pay mind to Mr Kanda's… sordidity.

thebookthief: ffff fyi, he can be really dirty. Dirtier than a whore on valentine's day. Tell your fantabulous drinking buddy that.

tikiroomMaster: er, will do. But as for you, offend him. offend him so much he'll be so wide open, ready to score a – million baseballs. Think ballpark, eh?

thebookthief: … mr marian, I can tell it's you.

tikiroomMaster: my WHAT GOOD SPORTSMANSHIP. All rightyyyy~ off you go, off I go~

thebookthief: … lurgy

tikiroomMaster is offline(5:17 PM)

kanda_not_yuu is available(6:13 PM)

thebookthief: er

kanda_not_yuu: I will leave.

thebookthief: wut. think I'm gonna just start on ya?

kanda_not_yuu: … … aren't you?

thebookthief: maybe I'm highly irregular / hur hurrr

kanda_not_yuu: you've reached your all time low.

thebookthief: but in all srsness, I miss you.

kanda_not_yuu: lavi, I saw you yesterday.

thebookthief: that's not what

thebookthief: nvm.

thebookthief: kanda?

kanda_not_yuu: okay, what do you want.

thebookthief: JUST YOUR LOVE IS ALL

kanda_not_yuu: there is no love. Go away.

thebookthief: there was plenty of love last night. Kinda. Sorta.

kanda_not_yuu: do not bring that up, again, for the last time, in chat.

thebookthief: *n*

kanda_not_yuu: do not offend me with that allen bullshit either. Enough of him.

thebookthief: … :D

thebookthief: that's my yuu.

thebookthief: … chan.

kanda_not_yuu is offline (6:25 PM)

kanda_not_yuu is available(6:30 PM)

kanda_not_yuu: say it again.

thebookthief: *n*!

kanda_not_yuu: lavi.

thebookthief: I know. But still! I want you. you're so far away.

kanda_not_yuu: how the fuck –

thebookthief: still. I meant it the other way. I didn't even get to finish your sweater.

kanda_not_yuu: no, I fixed it this morning. Your talents are a waste.

thebookthief: :D?

kanda_not_yuu: waste.

thebookthief: but Ilu. Like. SRS. LIKE A UH BALLPARK.

kanda_not_yuu: you don't play, what is it, baseball?

thebookthief: I could start.

thebookthief: yuu?

kanda_not_yuu: what is this about now.

thebookthief: eh?

kanda_not_yuu: your bs. If you're comparing baseball to balls, I am officially going to cut. You. down.

thebookthief: HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT. I'M SO NONPLUSSED.

kanda_not_yuu: considering the 'companions' you talk to…

thebookthief: yuu. you amaze me.

kanda_not_yuu: while I am still unamazed by your banter.

thebookthief: OKAY I'M COMING OVER RIGHT NOW OKAY YOU DON'T EVEN HAFTA PICK ME UP.

kanda_not_yuu is available(11:59 PM)

thebookthief: :3

kanda_not_yuu: idiot. I thought you were coming over. Hours ago.

thebookthief: uh, no, when did I say that?

kanda_not_yuu: when you said it.

thebookthief: I guess I forgot.

kanda_not_yuu: ….

thebookthief: well, I had a feelin you aren't so into the gay scene, so I decided to let you off easy.

kanda_not_yuu: ….

thebookthief: admit it, your penis is tired of my penis.

kanda_not_yuu: BULLSHIT.

kanda_not_yuu: if you start this fight, you better know how to end it.

thebookthief: don't you want to end it~ get it? end it~

kanda_not_yuu: yes. In fact, like so:

kanda_not_yuu is offline(12:08 AM)

&

[Sunday]

kanda_not_yuu is available(5:10 AM)

thebookthief: OTL

kanda_not_yuu: what the hell is that. If you're calling me 'one true loser' again…

thebookthief: one true lurgy~

kanda_not_yuu: .............

thebookthief: kidding~

kanda_not_yuu: why are you up?

thebookthief: untired. You?

kanda_not_yuu: what does that mean?

thebookthief: do you really wanna know?

kanda_not_yuu: I am asking.

thebookthief: oho~ OHO WELL

kanda_not_yuu: …

thebookthief: hinty hint: OTL ? :D

kanda_not_yuu: is this something i should look at from…

kanda_not_yuu: lavi.

thebookthief: :3

kanda_not_yuu: go fuck yourself.

kanda_not_yuu is offline(5:20 AM)

kanda_not_yuu is available(9:00 AM)

thebookthief: as I was saying, have some compassion for your fellow man, kanda~

kanda_not_yuu is offline (9:02 AM)

NightWalker is available(12:31 PM)

thebookthief: hey bro~

NightWalker: lavi, it is far too early for this.

thebookthief: allen, I have not slept for 48 hours. It is never too early.

NightWalker: what are you… no, what I mean to say is, why are you letting kanda control you this way?

NightWalker: this must be unhealthy. I'll ask lenalee to ask her therapist for you.

thebookthief: you don't get it, do you? the pure GENIUS of my geniosity.

NightWalker: lavi, when you start making up words like that

thebookthief: :EEE don't knock it, man

NightWalker: and you keep thieving my emoticons

thebookthief: cuz I can. I see no copyright.

NightWalker: well! I take precious time in… thinking up these things. ~(;o;)~

thebookthief: coughgoobercough

NightWalker: don't you dare spread that around. In fact, i'm sick of these rumors always floating around behind my back. The other day, somebody started a rumor about my bumping uglies with –

thebookthief: ohohohoho

NightWalker:*n* with kanda. *screams* whyyyyy

NightWalker: is he everywheeeere?

thebookthief: maybe you luuurve him.

NightWalker:… lavi. was it you who started the rumor?

thebookthief: you mean the very tasteful one about the locker rooms and track practice?

NightWalker: i

NightWalker: will never forgive you. did you really start it?

NightWalker: nvm! I don't want to know!

thebookthief: you shall survive, little grasshopper.

NightWalker: I shouldn't take such abuse.

thebookthief: i'll say. kanda still won't give in. i'm two seconds away from spamming the web with my genius plan to get into his pants. that way, he'd be really offended, and wouldn't have a choice.

NightWalker: lavi? You have done… nvm. I just want to say? you're batshit insane. *n*!

thebookthief: i – don't follow. Insane in what sense?

NightWalker: i'm not saying that you're insane for trying to be with

NightWalker: with him. … uuuughhhh

NightWalker: but I want you to get some sleep, so, I would like to offer you… some solicited advice: call him, apologize, and agree to remain friends. something sweet like that. *u* everybody wins!

thebookthief: you're such a dreamer, allen.

thebookthief: I've already called him and left him three messages. By this time, I probably sound sheerly desperate and I knowhe's thinking up some nasty things to leave on my door.

NightWalker: kanda wouldn't be that obvious.

thebookthief: it seems like you know him more than you let on, dear alby.

NightWalker: okay I'm going nooow

thebookthief: NO DON'T GO I TAKE IT BACK YOU'RE NOT DEAR

thebookthief: YOU'RE DEAREST ALBY

NightWalker: that's it. I'm dyeing my hair as soon as possible!

thebookthief: awww, dun do that

NightWalker: wanna come over to help? *u*

thebookthief: got yourself a date there, grasshopper. Give me a few~

NightWalker is available(4:22 PM)

thebookthief: hiya my dark and brooding stranger

NightWalker: *sigh*

thebookthief: wut. I thought you liked the color? YOU SAID YOU LIKED THE COLOR. YOU WERE ECSTATIC EVEN. YOU EVEN SNAPPED YOUR SUSPENDERS. YOU EVEN DANCED A STREET POLE WITH ME.

NightWalker: that's not it.

thebookthief: then, uh, pray tell, man

NightWalker:tummyache.

thebookthief: aahhhh you're so cute for eatin all the pigs in blanket …. s?

thebookthief: anyway, you're the cutest thing I ever did grope

NightWalker: I should tell kanda, I should.

thebookthief: but you're under obligation to please me~

NightWalker: that should be illegal.

thebookthief: I'd like to see that happen.

NightWalker: I can see where you two go wrong…

thebookthief: below the belt, there, walker.

NightWalker: I mean, like we talked before, you shouldn't manipulate kanda like that. It's not very nice.

thebookthief: lolol and?

NightWalker: and… *n* I wish I could be as mean as you. but I've forgotten how. I'm so out of sync.

thebookthief: I'll teach ya. Just be a good boy and go along with it.

NightWalker: *n* of course.

kanda_not_yuu is available(4:40 PM)

thebookthief: dare I trot in?

kanda_not_yuu: dare lose an arm?

thebookthief: now how would that even happen? I'm way the hell over here. You'd have a stretch to go, my friend.

kanda_not_yuu: ….

thebookthief: lover?

kanda_not_yuu: why is that albino kid talking to me?

thebookthief: you mean allen? Oho, he's not albino anymore. He's graduated to dark and brooding stranger~ which reminds me, he's got some tush on him.

kanda_not_yuu: pardon?

thebookthief: GASP. You mean YOU NEVER NOTICED???

kanda_not_yuu: pardon. As if I'd notice his scrawny ass.

thebookthief: he's gained so much weight this past semester. He's grown his own bubble butt. 333

kanda_not_yuu: and this concerns me because…?

thebookthief: you should know, you've touched it.

thebookthief: yuu?

thebookthief: c'mon noooowww

kanda_not_yuu: in no way is that funny.

thebookthief: but it is

kanda_not_yuu: no. it isn't.

thebookthief: IS TOO.

thebookthief: yuu.

thebookthief: yuu.

thebookthief: kanda?

kanda_not_yuu: So?

thebookthief: AAAHHH YOU ADMIT IT HA

kanda_not_yuu: bloody hell, I admit nothing. It was a mere accident that can be defined by probability of vicinity.

thebookthief: you hold out on me, yuu.

kanda_not_yuu: it was an ac. ci. dent.

thebookthief: use dente and you'd sound Italian. Kinky.

kanda_not_yuu: I have no time for this.

thebookthief: :D?

kanda_not_yuu: why is that unwanted stranger pinging at me.

thebookthief: whoever knows. Allen has been rather needy as of late. Today he let me feel up his tush. Really now, if that's not desperate, idk what is.

kanda_not_yuu: pardon??

thebookthief: aw, let me educate yuu. people do weird things in the name of love~ in the naaaaame of love~ like flocking to dark and brooding strangers… getting hair dye on their whitest undies – I mean, trouser shorts. Oh, imagine the mess.

kanda_not_yuu: ….

thebookthief: I must confess, I was quite tempted, mhm, rubbing that crown with black dye. You should see him, he reminds me of mr mack-on-me-mikk. His teachers are gonna have a field day with him~ oh, not to mention the closet probs. They're gonna come out and steal allen away to the hay fields, if ya get my drift.

kanda_not_yuu: lavi.

kanda_not_yuu: allen says you gave him a stomachache. Tch. Might I ask why?

thebookthief: allen. Yuu?

kanda_not_yuu: walker. You didn't feed him…anything. earlier.

thebookthief: :3

kanda_not_yuu: did you?

thebookthief: depends on what you mean by that.

kanda_not_yuu: ……

kanda_not_yuu is offline(5:09 PM)

NightWalker: *sigh* he's gone off again.

thebookthief: remind me to kiss ya tomorrow.

NightWalker: *sigh* go be full of love with him. let's talk later!

NightWalker is offline(5:15 PM)

kanda_not_yuu is available(7:50 PM)

thebookthief: all right. Hands down. You're the best sex I ever had.

kanda_not_yuu: ………………………

kanda_not_yuu: let's get one thing straight: I'm the only sex you've ever had. And will have. Now stfu.

thebookthief: don't worry, allen isn't visiting.

kanda_not_yuu: that has nothing to do with this.

thebookthief: pls be to doing more surprise visits in future. I don't think I'll be able to sit for a week.

kanda_not_yuu: let's get another thing straight: you said you wanted me. Tch. I fucking hate you. lead me on like that again and I will cut your dick off. No mercies granted.

thebookthief: ay ay capitan!

kanda_not_yuu: and you will not touch allen again.

thebookthief: ay ay, no evil grasshopper, got it!

kanda_not_yuu: seriously, lavi.

thebookthief: as honest as the queen here. I will never touch allen's wee-wee ever again. But ya know, I never did. so i'm pretty much guilt-free~

kanda_not_yuu: right. Goodnight.

kanda_not_yuu is offline (8:00 PM)

kanda_not_yuu is available(8:01 PM)

kanda_not_yuu: - wat.

thebookthief: :3 I LOVE YUUUUU.

kanda_not_yuu: TCH.

thebookthief: and your sword. lalala you're supposed to care, and i think you're really mean~

thebookthief: kanda?

thebookthief: hey…

kanda_not_yuu: every fiber, lavi.

thebookthief: ....

kanda_not_yuu: wat now.

thebookthief: r-really? like. you mean…?

kanda_not_yuu: just live with it, you epic, epic idiot.

kanda_not_yuu is offline(8:08 PM)