Metal Gear Solid- The Twin Teachers :

A semi- true story

Molly Colleen Sam and Brianna sat there, the four teenaged girls staring at the screen of their Metal Gear Solid game. They had just finished beating the Hind D and were on their way to beating it.

"NO! NO! A !! PRESS A!!!!!!" screeched Colleen, "DON'T MOVE! … … … NOW GO! GO GO GO! NO! BACK! GO BACK!"

"IM TRYING! IM TRYING!" screamed Sam in panic.

"SAM WATCH OUT!" screamed Molly as a missal was fired.

Colleen was having another enthusiasm spasm, "NOOOOOOOOOOOO! BACK! THEN FORWARD AND FIRE YOUR FLIPPIN' FAMAS!!!"

"Fire your flippin' what-as?" giggled Brianna.

"AHHH! NO! THE MISSAL!" cried Molly.

Brianna stared up, mimicking Liquid, "Eat this!" she said in a British accent.

The explosion's noise echoed through the room as Molly slurped the last of her slushy.

"Snake!? Get up Snake!" copied Brianna, then in harmony the girls screamed, "SNAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!?"

The girls again went into their ranting suggestions about how to beat the helicopter when suddenly Colleen pulled the remote from Sam's hands, and Sam pulled back, they went into tug-o-war with it. The two pulled until it flew out of their slippery hands and at Brianna's head. "OW!" she shrieked as the remote landed on the ground upside-down. The landed on the 'A' button firing the Stinger and with a sudden echo of explosion and gun-fire- the helicopter went into video sequence as it flew to the ground. "KA-PLOOSH!" giggled Colleen as Snake muttered "that takes care of the cremation".

"NOOO! LIQUID!" cried Brianna at Liquid's semi- death.

The girls stared up and were ready to go to communication tower B's elevator.

"GIRLS! SAM'S MOTHER IS HERE!" cried Brianna's mom- … they stared at Sam. "Tooda-loo…" they said, disappointed she had to leave but concentrated on beating the crap out of the guards. Though the girls beat the game shortly after Sam left- they were all obsessed even so.

The girls were officially taken by the game's fascinating gore and secret agent-ness. They were more obsessed with it than ever and still becoming more so. The following Tuesday at school- Molly and Sam were in pull-out (our school's study hall) , having the usual odd conversation and the usual odd antics- when they came into debate whether or not they should ask their teacher, Rassmoossen if he liked Metal Gear.

"No you do it Molly-" said Sam.

"No- you, ." said Molly. It went on for a minute or two until the bell rang. Molly, seeing they were out of time to decide who should ask, ran up reluctantly and asked the fatal question.

"Yeah- I've played all the games!" he said enthusiastically.

Molly gasped in awe… staring up at this- this- … teacher, no.. this fellow metal gear fan….

She stood, shocked for a moment, the previous week- her friends and her asked the Math teacher if he liked Legend of Zelda- and they freaked out and typed a story about it ( the initiation by Kingdom-Of-TJ) . Now- this teacher liked Metal Gear?

"Do- do… you like Zelda?" she stuttered, shocked,

"Yeah- especially Ocarina of Time!" he answered happily.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" she screamed running through the hallways.

There she saw , the math teacher whom enjoyed Zelda and starred in 'The Initiation'. She was quick to think, " MR SNULL ! " she cried happily.

"Yes, Molly?"

"Do you like Metal Gear?"


He didn't finish, and Molly was screaming with excitement running through the hallways by the time he had his first word out. She ran through until she came to the crowded hallway, franticly seeking her companion, Brianna. There she found vibrantly blonde hair exiting the locker bay and ran through to see Brianna.

"BRIANNA!" she cried as her blonde friend came to meet her half way to her locker.

"Yes Molly?" she said.






"COME ON! Out with it woman!"


"AAAAAAAH!" yelled Brianna with glee, nearly dropping her books.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" they both shouted together. Shortly after various curious peers' questions and more screaming Brianna ran to greet Sam and bring the great tidings. She scampered her legs as fast as she could, realized she pasted her, stopped and finally caught Sam.

"SAM!" she squealed.


"Did you hear?!"

Sam smiled, "OH! That! Yes! I heard!"

They both gave a short scream followed by laughter.

With that they went to their busses and awaited the next day.

Brianna ran into the hallway at second period to see Colleen and walked to her immediately- "Colleen!" she said happily. "Didja hear!?" said Colleen.

"Yeah!" they didn't have time to talk but they were equally excited.

However- by fourth period- perhaps their excitement was a little insane. The teachers were in Snull's room… talking about that week's homework assignment. "… I'm sure they won't know we used the calculator," agreed Snull.

Then, the girls ran in the room, aligned with bags, ropes and bats. "Girls… why do you have hostage tools?" said Rassmoossen. Molly slowly grew a sinister smirk.


Rassmoossen awoke to the room, except… the floor was flooded with water and he was floating on a desk with metal tanks floating in the water. He was wearing scuba gear. Metal piping was all around the room and several students dressed to look like some type of guards were walking between floating desks, as they all linked forming a floating desk floor, and metal boxes made a sort of maze. It was gray mostly. It looked somewhat like ... The first level of …

"Metal Gear Solid." muttered the LA teacher.

Immediately he decided just to walk off through the water and go to the door and have those girls expelled, but he saw the water was up to his stomach once he stood, he trudged through and suddenly a Alarming BLEEP! Sounded off as a student-guard-kid shined a flash light at him, "It's the enemy!" she cried. He could see through the student's white ski mask and saw it was Angela- one of the 8th graders, he saw clearly the tall one standing next to her was Jessica. He looked up at the girls, whom were armed with nerf guns.

"Hehe, hey... Jessica and Angela… he-hehe, no hard feelings about the check minuses I gave you right?" he said, quivering. CHH-CHH sounded Jessica's gun as she pulled the back trigger thing-y.

The hail of foam bullets pelted him from all angles, Rassmoossen suddenly heard, "RASSMOOSSEN?! Get up RASSMOOSSEN! RASSMOOOOOOOOOOOOOSEN!" from the loud speaker. He was knocked out by a plastic bullet overload and awoke on the same platform he did before. He looked around and decided maybe he should try to sneak past the guards. He started out by crawling along a wall until having to go under a jutted out vent, or, in this case under a piece of paper coming out from the wall, labeled vent. He snuck past Angela and Jessica to the door and when he opened it- the whole classroom flooded out, pouring Angela Jessica, Desks, and tanks out of the class room and into the hallway, of course Rassmoosen as well was carried away in the up sweep and was caught under water. "RASSMOOOOOOOOOOOOSSEN!" he herd the loud speaker cry.

Once again he woke to a classroom flooded with water, and on the same platform as before, except this time Angela and Jessica were damp with water and the desks were all sideways and upsidedown, forcing the guards to stand on one desk together. Rassmoossen thought for a moment, "..Okay, the door? No can do… hmm…" he stared at a vent, a rea lvent on the side of the classroom. "AH HA!" he cried and heaved himself up into the small space. He began to work his body through the vent system as soom he came to a rat, "EEEEP! A RAT!" he shrieked. BLeeP-EEP rang a familiar sound. "A codec!?" said confused Rassmoossen.

"Rassmoosen," said a voice he recognized,

"Colleen?" he asked,

"Colonel to you,"


"Rassmoossen- you have exactly 18 minutes to save the school from terrorists…. Good luck."

"What!? HEY HEY! NO! I- I- am a teacher, NOT a secret agent! And also- it's 18 hours in the game!"

"Yeah- but that would be too easy--- so anyway- good luck!"


The other line didn't respond and Mr. Rassmoossen decided to keep climbing through the vent, there he came into…… the roof!?