Note: remember when I wrote stuff that made sense? yeah, me neither. but what the heck, enjoy!
Oh, and: Twilight doesn't belong to me.
teatime by Black Dandelion
I sort of love you. It's not rational, logical or acceptable. But I do.
I'm not a gentleman anymore, because I took you on that couch. The same couch my wife lay on when she was pregnant and bruised. And I took you there.
I don't dazzle you.
See, this is a fact. If it were Bella, it isn't and will never be, but if it were then I wouldn't know this. I would keep guessing, but I can hear you. Not just your thoughts, but you.
And I don't dazzle you.
Your mind is an open book: you think I stink. My hair is too fluffy and my skin too cold. Only weird people and pansies glitter in the sun. I talk too slow and formal. I'm too careful when I kiss you. But you love it when I kiss you.
When I kiss you, your mind is blurry. It's like looking into a fireplace. There's a blaze and embers and the small sparks that are intelligence. Edward, more.
I have to get divorced. I have to get out of this cottage of broken dreams and sparkles.
Edward tells her on a sunny day. They're in the meadow, of all places!, and he just tells her.
"I've been sleeping with another woman." She doesn't blink, there's no sharp intake of breath or tears rolling down her cheek. She just stands there and sparkles.
"Renesmee is mine," is her response. Her voice still sounds like chimes and her hair still shines. He hasn't changed her. "She stays with me."
"That's it?" he asks. Reminds himself of a time when he found her train of thought amusing, so long ago.
She snorts. (Such a odd sound from her).
"What? Should I say I'm surprised?" Her fist flies towards his face, he doesn't duck and the impact of the blow sends him back. "I can smell her on you, every single night. I can smell the wet dog!"
She turns around, paces up and down the meadow a few times in her super speed.
"You can't have Renesmee."
"She's my daughter too."
"I gave up my life for you."
"I never asked you to."
She leaves. He resists the urge to scream after her. It's his daughter too.
Edward tells her on a rainy day. Well, technically, it's the same day, but later in the day. Edward tells her a rainy afternoon.
"I've left her." She doesn't look up. "I want you. All of you."
"I'm a homewrecker."
"Our home was wrecked way before you and I…" he clears his throat and she lets out a laugh despite herself.
"Still can't say the f-word, huh?" She stands up on shaky legs, meeting his eyes.
"I mean it, Lee. You put me back together."
She kisses him. Her mouth is warm and his whole body beats hot against hers. Wrapping her curves around him, she takes him in the same forest her ex-boyfriend once took her in.
Bella keeps her word. Renesmee becomes her daughter.
Renesmee worships Jacob with the same unhealthy blindness Bella once worshipped Edward with.
But Jacob's eyes are never entirely fixed on Renesmee, they follow Bella's curves. He fantasizes because Edward's not there to hear.
And when Renesmee looks eighteen years old, she walks into the house and she's been studying with Carlisle the whole day, her eyes are sore and all she wants is a cup of tea and a pep talk from her mother. But there are sounds,
And when Renesmee looks eighteen years old, a year after Edward told Bella, she walks in on Jacob and Bella. Her heart breaks because all she knows is Jacob and he is wrapped around Bella.
Bella tries to explain, there are words, Renesmee is sure, that were meant to be explanatory. But Renesmee only sees.
After a year, Renesmee becomes his daughter. She knocks on their door in the middle of the night.
Their house is a few miles from the mansion; it's small and woody.
They spend their nights wrapped around each other. And then Renesmee knocks. Her gift is so appropriate in that moment, she touches Leah and Leah knows.
And Leah wraps her arms around her and Renesmee is so, so grateful because she knows how much Leah hates her. And Edward ushers them both into the house.
"Let's get you some tea, honey."
We never got married. I should find this weird. Because I'm me and I like the concept of marriage. But you think it's a chauvinistic oppressing invention and you don't need any more oppression.
So, we don't get married.
And I won't tell you this is forever. But, I'm hoping. I really am.