OUTTAKE#1 (I own the plot but nothing else.)
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I am so happy to be diving back into the world of Edward and Bella. I spent so long writing Welcome to the Real World that it feels like visiting an old friend now. Lol. And I can't wait to see what you all think about the outtakes, getting the back story as it were. This first outtake is of Bella telling Renee she's pregnant. I was going to do one where she found out she was pregnant but I already covered that in the original story, as a flash back. Anyhoo, don't forget to review. I can't wait to hear from all my old friends.
MOOD MUSIC: 45 by Shinedown
I was a good kid. As a matter of fact, I was a phenomenal kid. I spend my time studying and making sure my mother isn't over doing it with any of her heinous plans. Okay, so maybe I'm not perfect. Far from it really. But I never thought I'd make such a big mistake.
"Mom?" I called hesitantly from the doorway.
She looked up from her vanity. My mother's room always smelled of lilacs. It had for as long as I could remember and I breathed it all in, trying to calm myself.
Nothing was going to calm me. I knew that. Not when my entire life was changing, when the world was shifting underneath me.
How had this happened? Oh yeah... Edward.
I felt that same thud of pain drop in my stomach and it felt like someone was squeezing my chest, just like every time I thought of him. He was my best friend. ...or at least he used to be. I didn't know what he was now. He was probably hurt, and no doubt he was mad at me. I had ignored his calls and refused to call him back. How had I let this get so out of hand? I should have just answered the phone that first time he called, told him my worries.
The thought that I may have lost him completely, even his friendship, scared me more than what I was doing now. ...telling my mother something that I knew would crush her. Disappoint her.
"Yes Hun?" She said absently.
She was getting ready for some charity event that the minor league was hosting. Who knew baseball was charitable?
I gnawed on my bottom lip nervously. Maybe this wasn't the right time to tell her. She was getting ready to leave. I could always tell her when she got back. Or even tomorrow.
Come to think of it, what's the rush? I have nine whole months. Well, actually eight months now. How had I been... oh god, I couldn't even think it. Pregnant for a whole month without even knowing it?
I sighed. She needed to know this now. I had known I needed to tell her since the doctor had uttered those dreaded words this morning.
I swallowed, my throat constricting, as if my body was plotting against me. Trying to stop me from admitting this out loud.
Renee looked up, her eyebrows raised. Her makeup lay on her vanity forgotten for the moment.
"What is it Honey?" She asked.
I took a deep breath.
"I need to talk to you." I managed, my hands shaking so badly I had to clasp them together.
She nodded, motioning to the foot of her bed just a couple of steps from where she sat.
I shook my head. I couldn't sit just now.
"I really need to talk to you." I repeated, tears welling up in my eyes.
Renee's eyes widened and she got up from her seat.
"Baby. What is it?"
Her gold dress shimmered in the dim lights of the room as she walked to the doorway where I was standing. I concentrated on that as I tried to control my breathing.
"It can't be that bad." she tried to reassure me.
She brushed the back of her hand across my forehead, checking for a fever.
"Are you still not feeling well?" She asked, concerned.
I closed my eyes around the tears threatening to spill over. I couldn't fall apart. If I fell apart I would never figure out what I was going to do now. And I needed to have a plan.
"No." I mumbled.
I was feeling awful. I had been all week but I had a feeling that would be the least of her worries when she realized what was causing this particular ailment.
Just the fact that she hadn't even thought of that made my heart lurch painfully. The thought hadn't even crossed her mind, it was the furthest thing from her mind. Because she thought she could trust me. She thought I was smart, and that I knew better.
I had thought so too.
"We'll get you a doctor's appointment." She told me sweetly. "Do you want me to stay with you?"
I shook my head, wiping a hand across my eyes.
"I'm sure Phil wouldn't mind going alone Babe." She assured me. "He's been worried about you too."
I made a sound that oddly resembled choking.
"I already went to the doctor's." I got out.
I pried my eyes open to look her in the eye. She deserved at least that.
"You did?" She asked curiously, still not sensing the direness of the situation. "What did they say?"
I ran my hands through my hair and then stopped myself. I felt like I had been slapped.
Even when he wasn't with me it seemed his presence lingered. What would he think? What would he say? Would I even be able to tell him?
As soon as I thought that last question I knew I had to tell him. I would never be able to hide something like this from Edward. He meant the world to me. Asking me to keep something from Edward was like asking me not to breath. But would it be worse if his reaction was... I don't even know.
"Mom." I began again, unclasping my hands and taking one of hers in my shaky fingers.
Her hands felt so warm in my icy grasp.
"I really need to tell you something. But I need you to try to understand."
She nodded, her eyebrows furrowed as something in my tone finally hinted at the seriousness of my admission.
"You can tell me anything Bell." She told me, grasping my hand. "You know that."
I sighed, feeling the weight of the last week or so wearing on me. My eyes were dropping, my bones ached, and I just felt... hollow for the moment.
"I know." I said quietly.
The last thing I needed was for her to feel like a bad mother. I didn't blame her for anything, not my upbringing. She had taught me everything I needed. This was my fault. Mine and Edward's.
"I've been feeling really sick." I began in a subdued tone, watching my mother intently for the moment she caught what I was trying to say.
She nodded. But then a look of terror took over her expression.
"Oh my God!" She gasped, her eyes welling up.
"What?" I asked, alarmed by her sudden mood swing.
She hadn't put everything together that quickly had she?
"It's cancer." She cried. "Isn't it? You've been sick. You went to the doctors. Alone."
Her lower lip trembled and she squeezed my hand.
"Alone." She whimpered. "Oh my God. Someone should have been there with you. But we'll get through this. You can beat this."
"Mom." I said, placing my free hand on her shoulder. "Mom."
"Oh, my baby!" She wailed.
"Mom!" I said louder. "It's not cancer."
She looked at me as if she wasn't sure she believed me or not.
"It. It's not?" She asked, her eyes still tearing.
I shook my head.
I laughed, despite myself. I think it was just the stress of the situation. If I didn't laugh I was going to break down and I didn't think poor Phil could handle it if both of us were crying. He had a hard enough time living with two women as it were.
I grimaced. Well, this was going to make it a hell of a lot easier, wasn't it?
"I promise." I assured her.
"Then what is it?" She demanded, sounding like a woman at the end of her rope.
Yes, she had definitely grasped the level of importance.
"They took some tests." I said, growing nervous again.
My stomach fluttered uneasily and I set a hand there, trying to sooth it. Although I don't think what was wrong with my stomach could be soothed so easily.
Renee looked down to where my hand rested on my stomach and her grip on my other hand grew noticeably tighter. Some of the color drained from her face.
"Yes..." She prompted, not looking away from my stomach.
There was a note of horror in her voice.
I took a deep breath. There was no easy way to say this. I didn't even have an idea how to say it at all. Maybe I should have practiced before I came face to face with my mother. Although that would have meant saying it out loud and I couldn't bring myself to do that.
I had spent the entire day since I got home from the doctor's office trying to make myself believe it but it kept getting stuck in my throat.
It came out as one word, something I wasn't aware of until it was already out. I found myself holding my breath, waiting for my mother's reaction.
She blinked, looking at my face quickly before looking back to my stomach.
I moved my hand self consciously.
She burst into tears.
"Mom?" I choked.
A new hole erupted in my heart, right next to the one that opened up every time I thought of Edward. Would I ever be able to see him again? Or would he be so mad at me for avoiding him... for ruining our relationship before it had even really begun that he'd never want to see me again? If that was his way of thinking I can only imagine what he would feel when I told him we were going to have... that I was pregnant.
"Mom, I'm so sorry." I said pitifully.
If she only knew how sorry I was. And yet I wasn't sorry about what had happened between Edward and I. I loved him more than anyone on earth. No one would ever be able to add up to him in my eyes. And I knew that everyone that I ever meet in the future will be compared to him. I won't be able to help it.
"How?" She finally asked, not looking in my eye.
I blushed. I knew she didn't mean how. But I was worried about that part of the conversation, although it was unavoidable I suppose.
"Who?" She asked before I had even answered her previous question.
She shook her head, a few tears spilling over her cheeks.
"God, Bella. You know how hard this is going to be."
I nodded numbly.
She had spent my whole life drilling into my brain that I needed to live my life before I got married or had a baby. She had married my father at seventeen and had me a year later. She knew what she was talking about.
"I know." I whispered.
She dropped my hand and walked to the bed, plopping down like she hadn't sat in days.
"Are you sure?" She asked, all emotion leaving her voice.
"How far along are you?" She asked, her face contorting in pain as she acknowledged my... condition out loud.
"Four weeks." I whispered.
Her eyes flashed up to mine.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: There you are. I hope you liked it. I will be updating fairly regularly but I still need to focus on my newest story, Reassigned Identity. If you haven't read it yet you should drop by and check it out. It's got a sexy secret agent Edward and a feisty Bella. Plus drama and lots of Emmett scenes. Lol. Sorry for the shameless self advertising there.
Here's another, more worthy, plug. It's called The Hard Way To Learn A Lesson by Stephaniiie. It's really good. I'm hooked. Lol. If you read it make sure to leave her a nice review. :-)