AN:- Okay here's where I say go read the first two parts if you haven't already, they're not too long, but basically otherwise you'll read this and question what the hell I'm doing…

Basically my stories sent the whole thing AU, when I was writing the first two it was fine but I've had like over a years gap between writing this and the last fic, so hence now my stories are completely different from the series story arc…

If you really don't wanna read them the very VERY short version is (Nobody's gonna get me) when Dean sells his soul he and Sam go to see Jo so Sam can apologise for the events of BUABS, Dean spends the night with Jo and a few months later she turns up pregnant, but through the pregnancy they develop feelings for each other, after defeating the crossroads demon (which in my AU got Dean out of his deal, similar to how Sam thought it would originally in the series) they made a life together (Let loose from the noose) Dean and Sam have given up hunting, while Dean, Jo, and they're daughter Ashley settle into a weird family life Sam hooks back up with Sarah and they get married and she's expecting…however just when things are getting normal an old friend shows up, one night Meg comes and kidnaps Ashley and Sam…while they band together on the mission to save the two Dean and Jo find Sam alive and well, but are too late to save their daughter from Meg...

Really hope you actually went and read the stories instead because the description sounds LAME!

Just to let you know even though I've took so long between writing I am working off my original notes I made right at the beginning, hence I stress again that you have to keep in mind the slight AU…after season 2 NOTHING was the same as the series…and you'll see that in the visitor/troublemaker who sets off my story in the first Chapter…

Chapter 1

When she was gone…

Dean kissed her hard, passionately, hands moving everywhere. He turned her, pushed her onto the bed, and when she was on her hands and knees he climbed on top of her and sucked kisses down her neck. He unzipped his jeans, but then he paused.

He rolled her over onto her back before pulling down her panties; because she was blonde he knew he couldn't fuck her from behind. He wouldn't admit it to himself, but he knew his mind might play tricks on him. If he couldn't see her face he might forget where he was, when he was, and pretend she was someone she wasn't.

He couldn't let that happen. She was Kaylee, or Kaycee. Whoever, but she wasn't her, and that's why she was here, because she wasn't Jo.

He didn't think about Jo, hadn't for months, and this girl although blonde was nothing like Jo, and that's why he was going to fuck her. That's why he fucked all the girls he did, because they were nothing like Jo.

It wasn't a great leap from where he'd been years before, apart from this wasn't carefree fucking. This was primal, basic, he had a need and every time that need arose his mind did all it could to separate out the emotion that he'd once felt. To make him forget that he'd ever made love. It wasn't that he didn't want to sleep with these girls – like he did when he was young – but it was different now. He was different now.

Dean was kissing her, his hands stroking down her stomach, teasing her, making her breathe heavy. He whispered gruffly into her ear, "I hope you're ready for me, sweetheart."

She nodded, not able to speak. He slipped into her and fucked her hard and slow.

When she was gone, when he was back in the Impala and driving to the next place he thought about Jo. Didn't think anything specific, just about what she looked like, and he didn't know why, because he'd fucked blondes before, blondes who looked more like Jo, but tonight her image wouldn't stop haunting him.

He usually brushed any thoughts of her aside, because he knew thoughts of her would lead to thoughts of Ashley. But this time he didn't stop himself. He let himself think about Ashley – for the first time in over a year – or at least he tried. He tried, but he couldn't do it. Her face was average, non-specific in his mind; he knew that wasn't Ashley's face. And that's when Dean realised…that he'd forgotten what his own daughter looked like.

Before he could finish his thought he saw a bright light. The car behind him was flashing him, so he pulled over and got out of the Impala. He couldn't see the driver until they got close, because they'd left their lights on, and it was so dark everywhere the lights didn't touch and too bright anywhere they did. But when he could finally see who it was, Dean's only thought was, 'Oh Shit.'

"Hey Dean. Remember me?" Dean heard as a fist collided with his face. Dean's body flew back a bit at the force, but after he stumbled something snapped inside him, just in time to block the next punch.

"Hey Gordon." Dean said forcing Gordon's fist back, "Nice to see you." He returned the favour by punching Gordon back.

Dean had been living hard the past few years, on his own without his dad or Sam around, and this time was different to the first fight him and Gordon had had. Also Gordon was a lot older now and Dean got him to the floor with a few more punches.

"Well; this has been nice Gordie…" he said walking away, "but I have to get going. I'll call you though." Dean muttered under his breath as he got back into the Impala and peeled away from the roadside. He got so far and then chastised himself for leaving Gordon alive. He was bound to try and get to him again eventually, and Dean didn't need that kind of hassle. Then he remembered the time Gordon had used Sam as target practice, and two things occurred to him; one, next time he might not get close and give Dean the opportunity to block his attack…and two, next time he might not be the one he goes after at all.

Dean knew it was too late to drive back. Gordon would be long gone. So he went somewhere he hadn't gone in almost 2 years. He went to see his brother.

AN:- So like I said AU in consideration in my story Gordon never escaped from jail, he served quite a long sentence and has only just gotten out…

Hope you guys liked it, and can't apologise enough for the wait…