Yadda Yadda Yadda. I do not own any of the characters, although I am aware I'm probably the first to try this particular spin. But I'm not being egotistical or anything about it.

This is the sequel to Father Knows Best. As for the current story, you can read the original, or I can sum it up as such:

Asuka's father is the Commander of NERV. Hilarity ensues.

It is by luck that her roommates do not draw excess attention to her vegetarian diet. Instead, the Commander goes as far as to create food from multiple pots, ensuring that no meat gets into her meals, and instructs others to do the same. Still, the Commander being the Commander, some caution must be taken.

"Good afternoon, Ayanami."

Red eyes meet golden red eyes. Sitting across from the lunch table from her, her newest coworker and fellow Pilot sits down, humming to himself as he unwraps his own lunch. Which, from the puddle forming under it is decidedly not vegan.

"I still believe we are the same," she says.

He looks up as he takes a bite from his sandwich.

"You mean, our albinism? That is obvious."


He puts down the sandwich, hands open in front of him.

"Ayanami, despite my appearance, I am normal," he says, "You have insisted I am, in order, an Alien, an Angel, and a mutant miniature Evangelion. It is nothing but a genetic condition. My blood runs the same as any normal persons."

Rei grabs her fork and stabs him in the hand. His scream echoes through the cafeteria, prompting many to turn to them, and at the other end of the table Class Representative Horaki turns to her friend.

"You've taught her well," she says.

Asuka Langely Sohryu beams.

"I know."

Pulling the fork from his hand, Kaworu Nagisa glares at his coworker and fellow pilot, his eyes showing less rage and more frustration. This is not the first time she has made him bleed. On the other hand, she has gone back to carefully picking at her meal, as if her assault on him never occurred.

"What do I have to do to convince you I'm human?!" he demands.


He stares at her for a long moment, before quickly wrapping his sandwich.

"I…I will sit somewhere else."

And quickly, hurriedly, he moves to another table.

"So, what do we do with the self-aware two hundred foot tall biological superweapon?"

"Anything it wants."

Leather shoes clang on the metal catwalk as the two most powerful men in the Far East enter the Cage. The Cage, of course, is the nominal nickname of the holding area for the Evangelions, four two hundred foot tall cyborged superweapons that a few days ago prevented the wholesale extinction of the human race.

Kozou Fuyutsuki has seen many things over the years, and much of it would be, as a character in a fondly remembered American movie would put it, "shit that would turn you white."

But he is not sure that he will ever get used to Evangelion Unit 01, the giant purple, green piped, demonically visaged monstrosity, staring at him.

"Okay, that is creepy."

Pieter Sohryu, Commander of NERV, pushes a hand through his reddish brown hair and pushes his glasses back up his nose.

He quickly walks over to his third in command, the bearded, glasses wearing man in a labcoat.

"Ikari, tell me."

Doctor Gendo Ikari, man in charge of Project E, pushes his tinted glasses up his nose.

"Around when the Third Child woke up," he says, once again not referring to his son by name, "Lieutenants Ibuki and Aoba were finishing a scan of Unit 01 for irregularities. Their scan was confirmed clean, but the Eva then apparently became self aware. Its first act was to turn to Lieutenant Ibuki upon her making a joke about it."

"Where are they?"

"She refuses to leave Doctor Akagi's office until she gets here. Lieutenant Aoba is in Central Dogma. He is…not disturbed. He says he, and I quote, 'expected something like this sooner or later.'"

"Yeah, I did to," Sohryu says, palming his face, "Can it speak?"

"It is sub-vocalizing. Evas have an incomplete larynx and no tongue, but we have installed a Bluetooth transmitter that allows it to speak through the speaker system."

Sohryu sighs, and turns to the Eva.

"I'm Commander Pieter Sohryu of NERV," he says, "Can you understand me?"


The voice booms. The volume is enough to catch Sohryu off guard, and he turns to the glasses wearing Lieutenant Makato, who quickly works on a volume control at his console in the Cage.

"My apologies," he says, "But we are a little concerned. Please understand we do not have a good history with you acting on your own. The last time one of you acted independently, one of my pilots was nearly killed. Who are you, and what are you intentions?"

There is silence, as the Eva turns directly to him.

"I. Am. Evangelion."

It remains silent for a moment longer.

"I. Will. Protect. My. Child."

Something drops. Sohryu turns to find the clipboard Ikari was carrying has fallen to the floor and he is staring at the Eva in dumb shock. Fuyutsuki pushes past Sohryu, standing at the edge of the walkway, dangerously close to the Eva's jaws.

"Oh dear God," he says, "Yui?"

Neon Genesis Evangelion:

Mother Issues

Somehow, life outside of piloting a giant monster is unbelievably boring. It has been close to a week since he saved the world, and in that week he has not been allowed back at school until every possible test they can throw at him comes back clean.

Shinji Ikari is bored.





He and a warm water penguin are sitting on the futon, slumped down in their seats, watching television on what is actually a very nice flat screen teevee. Shinji has a soda in his hand, and the penguin, Pen Pen, has a beer. He isn't sure why a warm water penguin wants beer, but it most likely has something to do with the apartment's owner.

It isn't like he's alone alone. Misato calls every couple of hours to check up. Kaworu is rooming in the other room, and he seems friendly enough. Then, of course, the other pilots stop by since as it turns out the Commander lives on the top floor of the apartment building.

In fact, the building is mainly filled with NERV staff. The city is a company town, and most of the people he runs into on the base live here.

He still doesn't know where his father lives.

He doesn't really care.


"I know."

Another flash before his eyes. Standing in the hand of Eva. A familiar voice pulling him back.

He blinks, shaking his head. No one has explained to him exactly what happened when Unit 01 went berserk during the Sixth Angel's attack. They only used key words.

400% synchronization.

Full awakening.

Like the first pilot.

Only problem is, no one will tell him who the first pilot was, or what happened to him. No one gives him any answers, and he can't blame them. In the past few weeks, his entire world has flipped upside down, sideways and backwards.

Sighing, he gets up and walks to the kitchen. Just because he's confused doesn't override the fact that he's hungry, and he's lost track of the time. He pulls out the ingredients for a miso soup, glad that the sudden guardianship of two growing boys is enough to prompt Misato to stock the apartment with real food.

He quickly works, bringing the water to boil, and turns to find a bowl.

And comes face to face with Rei. Screaming in surprise, he slips on a hastily discarded hand towel and drops to the floor.

"How did you do that?!"

"I teleported in," Rei says, "The Commander gives me some allowances for my abilities in terms of swift travel."

Truth be told, he can't tell if she's joking or not, and…


Wait a minute.

"You…you what?"

Rei tilts her head, face puzzled…and sighs.

"I see Asuka has not told you."

"Told me what," he asks, picking himself up off the floor, "I mean, I've talked with her, but most of the time I'm around her we're being shot at by Angels or being carted around by helicopters. She just told me you'd be helping train me."

"I see," she says, "I am the Commander's adopted daughter."

"I know that," Shinji says, turning off the burner, "Everyone told me that. You're also a pilot. What didn't Asuka tell me about?"

Rei's feet leave the floor. Not falling.


Her eyes glow a soft red and her voice, when she speaks, reverberates.

"I am also a Nephilem."

And with the grace and fortitude of a sack of potatoes, Shinji faints.