(A/N) OK I'm sorry Jacob fans, but I'm gonna tell you straight out-he won't be in this very much. I don't like Jacob much-he's OK just a bit weird. This starts when she goes to Port Angeles with Jessica, after the movie. On with the story!!
We walked down the road leading away from the theater, Jess chatting all the way. That was why I'd chosen her over Angela, whom I preferred if I was being totally honest. Jessica found the need to fill all silences with mindless chatter, whereas Angela was silent mostly, and sweet. But right now mindless chatter sounded good, though I tuned out for most of it, supplying a few "ooh"s and "aah"s here and there.
Suddenly we passed a small bookshop. I was immediately drawn to it.
"Stop for just a second," I said to Jess. "I want to have a look in here."
"OK. I'll wait outside, I have a reputation you know."
It took quite a bit of willpower not to laugh. Shallow Jess. Just because it was a bit shabby, and sold secondhand books. I personally thought it added to the overall charm of the place.
As I entered, windchimes played a twinkly tune above me. It reminded me of my favourite antique bookstore in Phoenix. I'd spent a lot of time browsing there throughout my childhood. I'd have loved to do the same soon, but I'd bet Jess was already getting impatient. I headed straight for the darkest corner of the store. I had to squint to see in the almost pitch black, and I could barely make out the outlines of the things on the shelf, but they looked like dolls. I took out my phone and let the light shine onto one.
The very second I glimpsed it, I dropped it in shock. It was a doll, a voodoo doll actually. It was extremely intricately made, each stitch as perfect as the ones before and after.
But the most frightening thing was that the doll was almost an exact replica of Edward. As close a replica as a doll could get, anyway. His hair could have been actual bronze, and his eyes real topaz. I couldn't resist. I just had to get it. I carried it over to the counter and paid an old man for it-no, him. I wasn't sure what I would do with it. I couldn't hurt it, for obvious reasons. And I couldn't let anyone see me with it, I seemed crazy enough already. Although, I concluded, that means I have nothing to lose.
I returned to Jessica after I payed, and she looked at my paper bag.
"What did you buy, Bella?" she asked.
"Oh, nothing... just a book."
"It looks very small for a book."
"It's... a very small book! Y'know, one of those pocket books." She sniffed suspiciously, but left it. I was never a good liar.
When I arrived back at the house, after Jess dropping me off, I went straight up to my room. As I looked once more at the doll, tears sprang to my eyes. I fought them off as best I could while I tried to think of what to do with it. Looking back, it seemed kind of silly to have bought it, but somehow I know it was the right thing. He wanted me to forget him, he wanted a clean break. Well too bad. I wouldn't forget him, not ever. To me, it felt like I was hurting him by not taking his wishes into regard, but strangely enough, part of me wanted to hurt him, to hurt him for all the pain he'd caused me. These thoughts also contradicted my earlier ones.
Why can't you hurt him? Are you afraid? It's not like it'll do anything, voodoo isn't real, besides he's a vampire, it wouldn't hurt him even if it was real.
With that thought, I ran to my chest of drawers.
There must be a pin in here, somewhere, I thought frantically, ransacking each drawer and spilling their contents all over my bed. At last I found a sewing kit, with plenty of drawing pins inside.
I dug one out, pricking my finger in the process.
"Ow," I muttered to myself, but I didn't care, so long as I breathed through my mouth. Though that soon proved impossible, as I needed somewhere to keep all of the pins. I breathed shallowly, and only when I really had to but it was so overwhelming that eventually I surrendered and fetched a plaster from the bathroom.
When I was finally ready, I began to have doubts.
Are you sure you want to do this? I asked myself, but I had already begun, and there was no going back.
(A/N) Wow, that is a really long chapter for me, please don't get used to it as I usually can't find much to write about. Review please, I will cry if you don't!!!!!!! Kidding. But please do anyway! Now excuse me, I'm off to watch the X Factor. LUCIE IS THE BEST!!! Peace out.