Author's Note: Happy birthday, Trey! :D He's 40 years old today. I wrote this oneshot in celebration of his and Stan's birthday. Enjoy, and please review! ^_^

Disclaimer: South Park © Matt and Trey


Wendy watched in anticipation as her now 18-year-old boyfriend, Stan Marsh, tore off the shiny, dark red wrapping paper from the box containing his extra special present. She smiled eagerly as he removed the lid from the box and pushed the white tissue paper asiss.

Stan's mouth fell open once he saw what was inside.

"What the hell is this?" he asked, staring at the gift with wide eyes.

The smile on Wendy's face instantly disappeared. That wasn't exactly the type of reaction she was expecting to get from him.

"You don't like it?" she asked in disappointment.

"Well, no, it's just...I don't get it," Stan said. "I mean, do you expect me to wear this or something?"

Wendy nearly exploded into laughter then. "You're joking, right?" she asked, trying her best to keep a serious face.

Stan frowned. "What do you mean?"

Wendy finally couldn't help smiling. "Stan..." she began as she leaned over and reached into the box. "Why on earth would you think I bought this for you to wear?"

She picked up the garment that was neatly folded inside the box and draped it over her chest. It was a fancy piece of lingerie. The satin dress—if you could even call it that—had spaghetti straps and a lacy padded bra, and the sheer material of the dress ended at a point that most likely left very little to the imagination.

There was a long beat of silence as Stan gaped at the silky, cherry red article of clothing.

"So," he said, "you bought it for yourself? Why?"

Wendy shook her head absentmindedly, the smile still plastered on her face. "Oh, Stan..." she said with a playful sigh. He was cute, but he could be so clueless sometimes. She leaned in and kissed him deeply on the lips, only to pull back. "You really don't get it?"

Stan blinked. "Get...what?"

Wendy brushed her hand against his leg as she whispered seductively, "I'm your present."

She quickly got up and rushed into the bathroom to change. Stan sat there on his bed, feeling more confused than ever, when suddenly, he was hit with a wave of realization.

"Ohhhhh."