A/N My muse disappeared on me. It's back now!
It was a year since Derek and Addison had returned to New York. Many things had changed in that year but the one thing that hadn't changed was their love for one another. Both of them had cut back on their hours at work and they were making time for each other every single day. Even if it was just a kiss or a hug or even a text message. They both understood that not everyone got a second chance to fix what had gone wrong in their marriage, but they were getting that chance. They were determined to make it work.
The first round of holidays back in New York was difficult. Difficult because they spent it with Derek's family and because of the affair Addison had fallen out of favor with his mother and two of his four sisters. Thankfully the tension was diffused by Mark and Brianna who had come for dinner after they had had dinner with Brianna's rather large family. Of course Carolyn Shepherd, Kathleen Shepherd-Masterson & Jennifer Shepherd-Callahan had all put on a happy face when Derek and Addison arrived for Thanksgiving and then for Christmas. Nancy Shepherd, who was currently going through a divorce & Amelia Shepherd who had her own demons were both very happy to have Derek & Addison back at the big family dinner.
The biggest surprise that had come during the year was Mark and Brianna's surprise engagement. Everyone had been shocked when they had announced it in early June, just nine months after Addison and Derek had returned to New York and fifteen months after Mark and Brianna had begun dating. Rumors flew around the Shepherd family that the only reason Mark was marrying her was because she was knocked up. Those rumors were immediately quashed by both Brianna and Mark. Carolyn Shepherd had thrown herself into helping plan this wedding, a fact that did not go unnoticed by Addison.
Addison was hurt that her mother in law seemed to care more about her surrogate son's wedding than her biological sons' wedding. She suspected that Derek was hurt too but they both knew that if Addison hadn't been the bride nearly twelve years ago, Carolyn would have been immersed in the planning of her only biological son's wedding.
Addison was hoping that her own news would be well received by her mother in law and her sisters in law. She was expecting a baby. The news was still so new to her. After all she had only just peed on a stick ten minutes ago. That test had only been a formality. She knew she was pregnant. After all she had been pregnant before. She hadn't even told Derek about the baby yet. She didn't want to get his hopes up until she knew for sure. They had started trying to get pregnant during that trip to the Hamptons on their weekend off. After months and months of being disappointed, they had started to wonder if anything was wrong. Apparently they didn't need to worry about that anymore.
She was already late for work so she really needed to get going. Plus she wanted to tell Derek as soon as possible. She knew that he would be as thrilled as she was if not even more thrilled. He had always wanted a family but she had wanted to establish her career first before settling down and having a family.
As she pulled on her scrub pants she couldn't help but wonder what this baby would look like. Would it be a boy or a girl? Would it have her firey red hair or Derek's dark curls? Most importantly ,would the baby be healthy. A part of Addison wouldn't believe that she was going to be a mother until they laid her child in her arms. A part of her still believed that she hadn't been punished enough for everything she had done. From infidelity to abortion, Addison had committed some whoppers over the past year and a half. She tried not to think of the fact that her would-be firstborn would be walking all over the place and talking up a storm right about now.
Grabbing her purse, she pushed the thought of her would-be firstborn out of her head and walked out the door of the brownstone. She couldn't-wouldn't let the memory of what she had done to the first baby sully her excitement over having this baby. The baby she was going to have with Derek, her husband. The love of her life. The drive to the hospital seemed longer than usual today. Try as she might, she found it nearly impossible to push the thought of that baby-no fetus out of her head. Maybe if she referred to it as a fetus, it wouldn't still cause an ache in her heart.
Yes she knew she had done the right thing for everyone, but it didn't mean that her thoughts couldn't still return to the day she sat in the clinic waiting room. Seeing that damn Yankees onesie when she had gotten back to Mark's apartment to pack nearly unraveled her again. She balled up the onesie and stuffed it into the trash and went back to packing her stuff. She had to get out of there before Mark got home. She had written him a note telling him where she had gone and not to follow her.
Addison gripped the steering wheel tighter as she shook her head. She was desperate to forget that day, that time. She knew that she had to focus on the here and now. What was happening now was that she was expecting a baby. She was guessing that she was about eight weeks along but she would have to schedule an appointment with an OB-GYN. Apparently there were rules against treating yourself, even if you were the best OB-GYN on the East Coast.
She planned to walk right in to Derek's office and tell him but on her way to his office, she was accosted by Brianna, who Addison was secretly nicknaming Bridezilla until the wedding was over. Addison really liked Brianna. She was good for Mark, but really this wedding planning did not bring out the best in the nearly thirty-seven year old NICU nurse.
"Have you seen that fiancee of mine?" Brianna asked.
"I just got here Brianna. I actually have to-" Addison started to say. She was quickly cut off by Brianna.
"He's in a mood and I just don't get it! Is he having second thoughts? Does he not love me?" Brianna demanded. Addison sighed, knowing that she apparently had to calm Brianna down first before she could tell Derek her big news.
"Brianna, he loves you. I swear I've never seen him look at another woman the way he looks at you. No way is he having second thoughts." Addison assured her. Though now that she thought about it, Mark had been distant from her and Derek for at least a week. Maybe something was going on, but she doubted that it had anything to do with Brianna.
"Wait oh my God, you're pregnant aren't you?" Brianna realized as she looked at Addison, really looked at her. She had that glow that pregnant women always had.
Addison was surprised by the abrupt change of subject. She had wanted Derek to be the first to know, but she knew that Brianna wouldn't say anything to Derek, so she simply nodded.
"Yes, I just confirmed it this morning."
"Congratulations Addison. Derek must be thrilled." Brianna exclaimed. She wanted children of her own. She knew she wasn't getting any younger and neither was Mark. She was worried about her age and about the fact that there was already Down Syndrome in her family.
"I actually haven't told him yet. That's where I am heading next." Addison told Brianna with a warm smile.
"Oh my god and here I was complaining about my fiancée when you just wanted to get upstairs and tell Derek that you are going to be parents. So sorry for pulling you into all this. Go tell that husband of yours." Brianna insisted. She felt badly for keeping Addison from spilling her news to her husband.
"Okay… And Brianna? Just go talk to Mark. I'm sure everything is okay." Addison assured the slightly younger woman. She prayed she was right and that Mark was still in love with Brianna and that he was not cheating on her.
"Okay, I'll give it a shot." Brianna told Addison with a small, nervous smile.
Addison tossed Brianna one more smile before she continued her steps up to the neurology floor. Instead of taking the elevator, she took the stairs, allowing herself more time to figure out how she was going to tell him. Reaching the top of the stairs she smiled a small secretive smile. She couldn't wait to tell Derek that they were going to be parents.
She didn't knock when she reached Derek's office door. She turned the knob and pushed open the door just like she always did. She smiled when she saw her husband behind mountains of paper work. Being the head of a department was not easy and it usually resulted in a ton of useless paperwork. Derek looked up and smiled at her. He hadn't seen her since he had left at 4:30 in the morning to catch up on some paperwork. It was nearly 10am now. He stood up and walked around his desk and pulled her into his arms.
"Hi" Addison whispered as she buried her nose in the nape of his neck. She just wanted to gather her thoughts before she told him that he was going to be a father in about seven months.
"Hi" Derek whispered back as he tightened his hold on her. She was his world and he was so lucky to have her in his arms.
"Derek, I'm pregnant." Addison whispered against his neck. Derek was startled. He hadn't expected those words to come out of Addison's mouth. He smiled as he pulled back to look her in the eyes. Her eyes were shining with tears. He knew they were happy tears. He knew how hard they had been trying to get pregnant.
"When did you find out?" Derek asked with a smile slowly spreading across his lips.
"I suspected it for at least a week but this morning I took a pregnancy test." Addison whispered. Derek kissed her softly on the lips and when they parted his forehead rested on hers. He was so happy and he couldn't wait to be a father.
"This is amazing Addie. I'm so happy." Derek told her as he pulled her back into his arms and hugged her. He made sure he didn't hold her quite as hard as he had before she had told him about the baby.
"Me too Derek. I can't wait to see our baby." Addison whispered. She hadn't been this happy since Derek had come to the Archfield in Seattle and told her that he couldn't sign the divorce papers because he was still in love with her.
"I love you Addie. So much." Derek murmured as his lips found hers again and he kissed her. This time there was more passion behind that kiss. Addison wrapped her arms around her husband's neck and kissed him back. They were still in that phase where they couldn't get enough of each other. Addison wanted him right there and right now and she doubted that Derek would object. But first she had to do something.
She pulled away from Derek, biting her lip as she tried to work out what to say to her husband about this situation that she had been put into.
"Mark isn't cheating on Brianna is he?" Addison asked. Derek's look of love turned to a look of confusion. He had no idea what Addison was talking about.
"God no Addie. Why would you think that?" Derek asked, still confused.
"Brianna's concerned. She told me that he's been in a mood and then I realized we haven't seen him in a week and we've probably seen Brianna at least seven times." Addison murmured.
"I don't know what's going on with him Addie, but right now I don't really care. I'd like to avoid all conversations about Mark as I tear off your clothes." Derek told her with a teasing smile playing on his lips.
Addison smiled as she grabbed the hem of her scrub top and pulled it over her head revealing a black bra that she knew was one of Derek's favorites. Derek was right. Right now was not the time to be thinking about Mark. Addison needed sex and here was her husband and the father of her unborn child wanting to satisfy her. Her hands went to her scrub pants and she untied the drawstring and let the pants fall into a pool around her ankles. Derek watched her and he couldn't help but stare at his wife and think of all the things he wanted to do to her. Derek pulled of his own scrub top and then his scrub pants. Addison's face flushed with desire as she looked at her husband. Who was currently wearing only his boxers. Derek's blue eyes scanned her body slowly, stopping at her breasts that had definitely grown and were spilling over her bra. He knew she was wet without his hands even touching her. With a flick of a thumb and forefinger he released the clasp on her bra and it fell to the floor. Addison slid her black panties down her body and Derek's eyes never left her body even as he pulled his own boxers down his legs. Addison wrapped her arms around her husband's neck and her long legs around his waist as her lips fused onto his.
They spent the next several hours celebrating the pregnancy and all that would be coming with it. This baby represented so much for a couple who had already gone through hell and back. Neither one of them could wait to expend their family.