Thank you for all the reviews. I was surprised there weren't very many flames!! Thanks for that. But because of you I've been working very hard to get this chapter out!
I still don't own… But I sooo wish I did.
Chapter 8: Calm before the Storm
I stood completely still in shock. I pulled my shield tightly around myself sinking deeper and deeper into my sub conscious. The images of Jasper and Victoria burning my sight.
The question screamed in my head. The numbness was everywhere. Why? It was the only thing I could think. I couldn't handle this. He was mine. He took me as his wife… How could he do this to me… If he really loved me, why would he put me through this. He could have just as easily let me stay out there with Rose and Emmett. He could have done whatever and I wouldn't have to question myself. Am I not enough? Am I still not enough? Being his equal means nothing anymore…
"Isabella, are you thirsty?" His voice broke through my haze.
I blankly stared at him shaking my head "no" once. He stared back at me but then turned to converse with Marcus.
They didn't seem to feel anything was wrong. How could this be acceptable?
My mind drifted back to earlier, us lying in bed after making love…
"You know I love you right?" He asked breaking the silence.
"Yes, as I love you."
"Then promise you'll forgive me."
I turned so I was looking into his face, "Of course."
He turned and smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes.
"We will leave in only a few hours for Volterra. Go and speak with Rose and Emmett Darlin, I have a call to make."
He planned the whole thing.
No, he wouldn't if he really loved me.
Maybe he doesn't really love you…
He married me… He's my soul mate.
Says who? Some guy he's known for centuries… He just took away your master and your best friend. He's making sure that he's all you have left.
No, I still have Emmett… And Rose…
How long before he kills them too.
I won't let him.
You know you should leave. Leave with your brother and sister. He's just like Edward. You're the latest distraction of the day. He'll soon grow bored with you…
Then I'll end up like Vikki.
I gasped softly at the realization. There was nothing keeping me in Italy. Not any more. I had to leave. Even if I was only arguing with myself.
I found myself leaving into the hall where Emmett and Rose were waiting. They both stood up and took in my appearance. Rose looked concerned and Emmett looked murderous.
Wonder what I look like
My muse was getting the best of me.
"I want to leave." I spoke. My voice was void of all emotion. My tone was barely audible.
"What the hell happened in there?" Rose asked.
"Is Jasper…" Emmett trailed off.
"He's fine. I'll explain everything. But I want to leave. Now."
They exchanged glances and stood still. I let out a frustrated sigh, "Fine stay. But I'm leaving."
With that I took off running through the city and I didn't slow down until I made it to the airport.
"Bells. Wait. Wait for us." Emmett called.
Him and Rose were at my side and I suddenly felt better. We made our way through and looked at the boards. There was one flight about to leave for Seattle. I walked up to the entrance ramp and the clerk asked for my ticket. Rose and I dazzled him and we boarded without incident.
We made our way to first class impressed that it was empty besides us. I took my seat and waited for them to sit as well. They did and looked at me expectantly.
"We could have bought tickets." Emmett grumbled looking slightly put out.
"But then Jasper would be able to trace us. This way he won't know where we are going."
"Bella. You're not making any sense. Tell us what happened."
I launched into a very graphic account of what happened. My voice never wavered and I spoke in monotones. I couldn't bring myself to let any emotions leak out. Showing emotions would be my undoing. I told them word for word. Action by dirty action. I felt like I was losing myself. I heard loud sobs before I realized they were coming from me.
"Why? Why? WHY!!! Why Rose? Why would he? He loves me? Right? What did I do wrong? WHY?" I screamed.
Rose pulled me into her arms and began rocking me and trying to sooth me. While Emmett told the flight attendant I was going through a rough time and apologizing for my outburst.
I reigned in my emotions and fell silent. I could see and hear what was going on around me, but I couldn't speak. I couldn't find the will to carry on…
You promised to forgive him…
I don't think that I can.
Don't you love him?
With every fiber of my being.
Then what's the big deal? Sex is just sex.
Perhaps, but did he have to go down on her. Did he have to talk to her like he was in love. Did he have to do it in front of me? Was it really necessary?
You know the answer to that yourself, don't you.
It doesn't make sense…
Bella, Bella, Bella… You've known all along you were nothing but a pet. Do you think the God of Death and Destruction would ever be satisfied by you?
He's a good man…
He was until you let him drink human blood again
That's not true! This isn't my fault.
Edward left and it was your fault you were too fragile. Victoria changed you because they killed James… That was your fault.. Now Jasper fucked her and killed her because you let her and Aro convince you into a sexual relation with them. Even if it wasn't intercourse. That was your fault. Your sire is dead because of you. Is what Jasper did any different than what Aro did with Victoria and you? With all the other females he's been with. He's your new master. You need to please him.
I can't and won't be a part of that. He shouldn't have married me if he still wanted other women. You marry someone to show your commitment and to share a monogamous relationship.
Is that how it is for vampires Bella?
I sat there letting the things Bella tell us sink in. I could see Emmett looked like he was ready to kill Jasper. Perhaps it's best that Bella told us on the plane. Not when we could have easily gone back to kill him. Of course that would be suicide now that he was in charge of the Volturi. What were we getting ourselves into?
The pain Bella must be in. In a way I felt bad for Victoria… I would have been able to bond with her over the rape. But from how Bella tells it Jasper made sure she enjoyed it. Which to me is worse. It's so much harder when you're trying desperately to get away and you don't want it. But then your body still responds because it comes naturally.
I took in her appearance and the emotions playing across her faces were changing rapidly. Her eyes had a far away look in them. I knew she was catatonic.
"I'll kill him." Emmett growled his anger boiling over.
"We can't Emm… It'll hurt her worse. She still loves him… You can't change that in a matter of seconds…"
I watched my husband let out a low growl and sighed, "I know… But Rose what are we going to do? He's going to come for her…"
"We'll have to go to the one place he won't look for us."
"With the rest of the family Emmett."
"Rose no, you heard about what happened."
"It's the place she'll be safest. I'm calling Esme."
"hello?" Esme's quiet voice sounded.
"Mom" I said slowly
"Oh Rose! Where are you?" I smiled at the worry in her voice.
"We went to meet with Bella… Her and Jasper got married."
"I heard." Her voice had gone hard.
I sighed and explained everything that had happened, including Bella's current state.
"Mom she doesn't have anyone but him. She didn't want to stay there. Now she's unresponsive."
There was a long pause, "We're in Forks. I'll let everyone else know you're coming. Maybe Carlisle can look at her."
"We're almost there Bella. It'll be okay." I whispered hugging my new found sister closer to me.
"She's coming here?" I asked Esme as she hung up the phone.
"Who?" Alice asked coming up to my side with her arm around my waist.
"Bella." I said simply.
"So we kill her right?" She asked excitement clear in her voice.
"No." Esme and I spoke together.
Alice huffed, "What does she want?"
Esme shook her head and we followed her to Carlisle's office where she explained to everyone what she would be doing here.
"Jasper will kill us all if he finds out." He sighed pinching the bridge of his nose.
"Unless she comes back and shields us." I spoke up slowly.
"We'll help her Esme darling. We protect our family…" Carlisle spoke still pinching his nose.
It's going to be so hard to look at her now…
"Then don't." I growled.
The next 10 hours we waited until Emmett and Rose arrived home with Bella. She looked horrible. Her eyes were black and blank. There was nothing coming from her. I couldn't feel my Bella.
Emmett lifted Bella easily and walked her up to one of the guest rooms while Rosalie explained what happened.
My Bella had married him? And he did that to her?
I was seeing red.
I was thinking you could help her
Rose's thought threw me though a loop. I turned my gaze to her letting her know I heard her.
You could hum her lullaby. Help her come back to us all… Emmett and I tried everything we couldn't help her.
I nodded once feeling happy. I would get to lay with my Bella in my arms… She was so beautiful…
But weeks went by and there was no change. After a month with still no change she was wasting away. She wouldn't die from lack of nourishment as far as Carlisle knew, but I wasn't so sure…
A month I had been locked inside my mind. Much to my dismay every night Edward held me in his arms humming my lullaby. Every night he kissed the top of my head and expressed his love for me. He would apologize and tell me to come back to him. But I wasn't his. Not anymore. The one who held my heart hadn't tried to call or find me in a month. It just confirmed everything I had been thinking and feeling. It would never be the same for me again. I didn't know how to get out of this. But I knew I needed to find a way.
My animosity towards the Cullen's had all but evaporated. Except for Alice. Alice was always trying to sneak in. Part of me hoped she would succeed in killing me. At least then I could be put to rest. I wouldn't have to suffer anymore.
It was a day like any other day. I was left alone in my room and I could hear the conversations going on downstairs.
"Edward since you've already hunted would you mind taking on Bella babysitting duty?" Carlisle's voice asked.
"I'd do anything for her." was Edward's response.
"Perhaps you can give her a bath. I know Rose wants to do that later. You can tell them Alice helped you. I won't tell." Carlisle's voice sounded more hushed.
Edward, Edward, Fuckward… Always the horny 17 year old boy. He would never be man.
I tried to speak desperate to get out of this. I didn't want him to bathe me.
You'll like it.
I'm over him
That's what you say
It's how I feel…
I think you're just sitting here. You're not even fighting.
I want to! I don't know how.
Feel the way he caresses you while he's washing you. Doesn't it feel good?
No, I feel even more dirty now…
Don't worry Bella. You'll wake up soon. As soon as you're completely over Edward everything will get better…
He lifted me out of the tub being as careful as he'd ever been. Even now he was treating me like a human. I wasn't breakable anymore.
He dressed me in silk pajama's and I noted the tent in his pants. It made me feel disgusted.
That's when Alice entered the room.
"Looks like you could use some relief…" Alice smiled.
She was wearing a barely there teddy and I was disgusted.
"You look great." Edward drooled.
"You want me?"
"You know I do Alice."
He stood up from the bed and Alice giggled. She was over to him in a flash and Edward was lying in the bed beside me completely naked.
"I know you're going to think of her… SO why don't you watch her while I ride you."
My stomach twisted in knots when his eyes never left mine as Alice fucked him.
It was all I could take.
"NO!" I screamed.
The force of my shield threw them both into the wall. I stood up seething.
"All of you are nothing but the same. I love you's, You're all I want. And then this? Why in front of me. Answer me WHY!?"
My voice was loud and shrill and Alice smiled smugly.
"I don't care if you have Edward, Alice. I also know you want to kill me."
She smiled, and her smile was evil. She was looking for a fight.
I pushed my shield off and sank to my knees.
AN I was going to do Jasper's POV in this chapter as well… But I felt it would make the chapter too long. I know it's a cliffy please don't hate me!!!
Reviews are welcome! :D They make my day.