Shadows

Disclaimer: Skins does not belong to me in any way, shape or form.


She's beautiful.

Red hair, floral in scent, swings past her face and she smiles. She's stunning, maybe not the way Effy is, but she's gorgeous in a way that only she can be.

"What does being gay entail, anyway?"

He likes that he can ask her these sorts of questions. Stupid ones, that are really obvious, but ones he really does want to know. He can tell her anything, because she understands. She gets it. And even though Cook and Freddie have been with him since forever, it's her that listens to him, and doesn't brush what he says under some imaginary carpet.

She's different that way, and he loves that about her.

He figures they have a strange relationship. He's slept with her before, and he loves her, but not in that way. She's in love with Naomi after all, and he, well, he's sort of in love with Effy. Even if a part of him hates her for messing everything up.

God, when did things get so hard to explain?

She laughs again, and rolls her eyes, dismissing the question. He finds that he really doesn't care. It's just nice to be himself (not normal) and not care. He doesn't need a shitload of pills, all he's ever wanted was for someone to hear him. And for someone like him, it's hard making friends, so he's just stuck by Cook and Freddie. A shadow, tagging along because it's all he can do.

Then when he needs them, their gone. All Cook cares about is the latest shag, and all Freddie cares about is forgetting Effy…by shagging Katie.

Just another reason why everything has been so screwed up lately.

But when Emily's around, it's just a chance to forget. He's allowed to be honest, and it doesn't hurt anyone. He knows that Emily's in the same position as him. She's stuck in a shadow, always one step behind Katie, and hopelessly in love with someone. Maybe it'll work out better for her.

Nevertheless, they're both the same. And maybe that's why it's so easy to talk to one another. Maybe that's why it doesn't have to get complicated and messy. Because they're friends, and they're not pretending to be anything else.

Maybe it's because love has the extraordinary ability to ruin everything.

All he knows is she's pushing him through, and perhaps he's pushing her through, and that's all he can ask for. It's enough.

She's the one thing in his life that's not chaotic.

And he hopes it never changes.


A/N: I don't like the end. This was written after JJ's episode, but I didn't feel like uploading it until now. It's crap, I know, but I loved their friendship, so this is my contribution. I've missed my little Skins drabbly pieces.