Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who.

Never Had a Friend Like Me

He closes the door behind him, leaning heavily against the tough wood.

"Oi! You just gonna stand there all day or are you gonna come help me fly this thing?" Somewhere in the back of his busy mind, he recognizes the TARDIS' indignant hum at being called just a "thing."

He can't worry about that right now.


"Oh, here we go with that bit again!"


"Bit redundant, don'tcha think?"


"Spit it out, Spaceman. I'd hate for people to know words failed you."

"But you can't… I don't… You should… Dead… There's…"

"… never been a Human Time-Lord Meta-crisis. Doctor, you ain't never had a friend like me."

"But… how?"

"You, of course. You tried to take my memories, but I wouldn't let you. So my body shut down, to protect what's rightfully mine. And while I was out, my mind expanded, rearranging itself so I could cope with all the extra knowledge. Bit of a headache, but that'll be gone soon and this will all just be another happing ending to another adventure."

"You. Are. Brilliant."

"Like I said, Doctor, you ain't never had a friend like me."

In a perfect world, this would be the beginning of series five.=]