So sorry it's taken forever to post this. I started the sequel awhile ago then I had to go have surgery and life's very crazy right now. But here it is at last. I'd like to thank SupernaturalSweetheart for her help coming with up the plot (I was unsure of what to do and she gave me a brilliant idea) I've changed a few things but she helped me get this story on the way :) so I dedicated this to her.
Warning: Slash, mpreg
Our Forgotten Lullaby
Chapter I: Remembered
Soft kisses. Blinding pain. An icy embrace. Fear. Love. Eyes like golden fire. Eyes as black as night. 'I love you'. 'We hate you.' Safe, loved, home. Alone, scared, hell. An icy touch. An iron grip. Soft caresses. Painful hits. Soothing words. Taunting shouts. Dean. I. We. Love. Hate. You...
Dean's heavy lids snapped open, he gasped in ragged breathes through clenched teeth expecting, always expecting for there to be pain. Today was no different. He was stiff from pain that seemed to spread to every part of his body. He couldn't see through the fog that blurred his vision but he felt rough but gently hands push him back against the bed. He didn't think about who was in the room with him, he didn't stop to try and make out the annoying buzzing noises. All he could do was focus on the memories that had played so vividly in his mind while he was in the care of the darkness. He closed his eyes, the fog was not willing to budge and he would not try to force it from his sight, he had to think, had to remember.
Did someone say his name? It sounded so far away but there was a large hand resting over his, he could feel the warm skin. Warm? Dean's eyes immediately reopened, he sat up so fast that every bone, every muscle seemed to scream in protest. He doubled over in pain, a soothing hand ran over his back and a voice… a voice that sounded like Sammy's whispered to him that he was ok. But he wasn't ok, he wasn't ok because… because EDWARD! His panicked eyes scanned the room, where was he? Where was he? Oh God, no, he had been fine… Jason hadn't... Jason didn't kill him. Right? Oh god where was he?
"Dean, man calm down, it's ok, you're safe now."
Ok, he was sure that time he heard Sam but Sam was at Stanford, he was going to be a lawyer. Fuck, he wished his head would stop pounding so he could think straight for one fucking minute. He felt strong arms grip his shoulders and a misty face appeared before him. He blinked repeatedly until the fog vanished from his vision. "Sammy?" Dean asked. Why was Sammy here? Why wasn't Edward here? "Wh… why are you here?"
Sam's brow furrowed in concern but he laughed, in a way that seemed he was trying to convince himself that everything was ok. "To make sure you don't flirt the nurses to death."
"Dean" Sam's brow, if possible, furrowed deeper "You've taken a beating, you're in the hospital, do you remember?"
Beating? Dean crocked his head to the side when he was hit with a memory of being flung around a room like a broken toy. A hunter... Jason. High on vampire blood and out for revenge. Edward. Blood. "Dean" cool arms eased him gently from the floor; the coolness makes the pain go away. He makes the pain go away. "I'm here, you're safe now." The memory fades leaving glimpse of flying through the air and crashing to the ground and then darkness. Dean's eyes slowly open and he stares at Sam like he is some stranger. "Where is he?"
Sam momentarily looked confused but then his face shows signs of understanding "He's dead Dean" Sam said and he sounded relieved, how could he be fucking relieved when Edward was dead. "I killed him... remember?"
Dean didn't have time to think, he didn't feel the pain as he lunged at his brother. He went to throw a punch but his younger brother moved out of the way and caught him before he could topple to the floor. He had no strength left, the rage had burnt out too quickly and he had only sorrow left to fuel his broken body. He collapsed back onto the bed, Sam was staring down at him with confusion but Dean could only glare. How could Sam kill him? How could he? God no! He wasn't dead. He couldn't be. "How could you?" Dean choked out "I loved him."
Sam's confusion turned to bewilderment "Dean... I'm going to get a nurse; I think Alistair did more damage than we thought."
"What?" the sorrow died from Dean's face, something was not right. God where was Edward? "No, Sam I don't need a nurse I need Edward. Please tell me where he is! Please tell me you didn't kill him. He's not evil, he's not."
Sam slowly sat down and swallowed hard, he looked like he was struggling to keep his cool "Dean, who is Edward" he pronounced each word carefully.
"G... good" Dean stuttered and shook his head "he's not evil... he loves me..." Dean looked up "Damnit Sam where is he?"
Sam jumped back in surprise at Dean's sudden outburst. "Dean, do you remember anything about Alistair or what the angels asked of you?"
"Angels? Alistair?" Dean whispered. What was going on? This wasn't right. He took a deep breath to try and still his racing heart. 'Just close your eyes Dean' he heard Edward's voice (soft like velvet) in his mind. He took shallow breaths and tried to block out his surroundings but the loud constant beeping of the monitor made it difficult. "Focus on the rain Dean'. Dean listened, he heard the beeping, Sam's heavy breathing but there was no rain. He slowly opened one eye to take in the room; sun was spilling in through the window. He was not in Forks. The gloomy town may have had some sunny days but it was never this bright. He looked back at Sam and he really looked. He looked older. Sure he hadn't seen him in a year but he looked much older. Something was not right.
"I'm not in Forks, am I?"
Sam cocked his head to the side in the same manner as Dean had "No... No, Dean you're not."
Dean's head was spinning; he gripped the sheets beneath him tightly as he took in every word Sam spoke. His head hurt, his body hurt, everything hurt and nothing made sense. He was missing four years of his life. Four years filled with demon battles, hunts, one night stands, loss, laughter, sorrow, happiness, it was all gone. Every day erased, like defeating the Yellow-Eyed Demon and watching Sam die were nothing. He had forgotten it all; his father's death, his deal with the crossroad demon, Hell, angels, everything. He'd forgotten that he and Sam had become brothers again; he didn't know Sam like he should. He didn't remember the fights, the good times or the tears. He could only remember those golden eyes and the feeling he was given every time Edward was around. He remembered everything from his time in Forks.
"Dean" Sam snapped his fingers in front of Dean and he snapped out of his trance "you ok?"
"I'm... just mulling it all over" he sighed "I'm sorry, I... I'm just really confused right now."
"It's ok" Sam smiled half-heartedly "Maybe... maybe Castile can get your memory back or we should ring Bobby" he suddenly jumped to his feet, towering over Dean. "Yeah, we should call Bobby."
"I'm fine Sam" Dean said firmly before Sam could even move "It'll all come back" he grinned, play it cool Dean he ordered himself. "I just need some sleep and a ticket out of this place" he looked around the room with disgust.
"Dean you are not remotely fine" Sam retorted "you have no memory of the last four years not to mention you're lucky to be alive" his tone and features softened "I nearly lost you Dean... please.... please just rest" he saw that Dean was about to protest "for me. Please for me."
"Ok" he sighed. "Since we're so chummy again I guess I'll do this for you."
Sam sighed again "If you're pissed at me for leaving you've already given me crap for it so please don't start going off about something that I'm pretty sure you're over."
"Sorry" Dean looked down, suddenly interested in his hands "go call Bobby or Castiel or whatever."
"I'll be right back"
Dean barely heard Sam, his mind already miles away. How could he have forgotten Edward? The man he loved. The man he was willing to give up everything for. How could Edward let him walk away? How could he let him forget? They were meant to be together. Forever. Dean looked up, his icy stare rising to meet the clear glass of the large window that over looked the car park. Out there, out there was were Edward was. Miles and miles away, yes, but Dean would go to him. Dean would demand to know why he let him forget what they had. He would find the man he loved and this time, this time nothing was going to stand in their way.
The rain pounded down, echoing loudly in the glass room. It was dark; the only source of light came from the few candles that stood upon the piano. The soft glowing flames flickered in pools of gold, making them look, if possible, more beautiful. Dean was lost in those golden pools; the soft melody of the music had taken him away from his trouble and the pale skinned teens presence was enough to make his worst memories turn to ash. He smiled lovingly at the vampire, whose golden gaze was focused on the piano keys. The soft melody ended just as a streak of lightening lit up the night sky.
Gold met green and the two lovers' mirrored smiles moments before locking lips. Soft warm lips moved against ever cold ones but the chill of the vampire's skin never seemed to be noticed for the invisible fire warmed every touch. Lips parted and tongues ventured and explored as did hands. Dean's body burnt, not like the burn of vampire venom, but the burn of liquid fire that seared in his veins every time Edward's lips were upon his. The kiss came to a sudden halt and Dean gasped in a mouthful of cold air before gazing into gold orbs.
"What's wrong?" the hunter asked, his warn hand running over the smooth perfect marble cheek.
"I miss you" the vampire bowed his head.
"What?" Dean asked and he swore he saw Edward flicker. Like a ghost "Edward I'm right here."
"I'm sorry I let you go" another flicker and the room suddenly grew colder "I wish you were here."
"Edward I am here" Dean went to shake the vampires shoulders but his hands went right through him "Edward?!" he asked, his words laced with panic "EDWARD!"
"Dean. Wake up."
Dean awoke and sat up so fast that the world spun. The man who sat perched on his bed was unknown to him; his stone features were bleak and his green eyes dull. The fleeting panic halted in Dean's veins and he found himself able to move and reach for the knife he hid beneath his pillow. The strange man gave Dean an odd look before letting out a deep sigh. His green eyes looked to the ceiling but he seemed to be looking beyond it.
"I am Castiel" he announced in a deep voice.
"The angel?" Dean couldn't believe he just asked that. Angels? No way. "What do you want?"
"I came to see how you were fairing" he looked back, his deep voice seemed odd after listening to Edward's velvety one "Sam told me that you have lost your memory of the last four years" he still gazed at the ceiling, he sat so still (just like Edward) "I hate to go through this and I really have no time but I need you to trust me" he looked at Dean now, his eyes piercing. "God has work for you and I can't have you running off to some vampire."
"Excuse me?" Dean exclaimed with fake bewilderment "I don't know what you are talking about."
"Yes you do Dean" he said and he should sound angry but his face and voice showed no sign of it. "I know you loved him but that was years ago. You must forget him and move on. You and Sam have to stop Lilith."
"I always imagined angels would have fluffy wings" Dean mused but his tone and features suddenly hardened. "I don't know who you think you are but I am sure as hell not listening to a word you say." A flicker of an unreadable emotion crossed the so-called angels face. "Here's what I'm gonna do. I am going to drive to Forks, as soon as I can move without feeling like I lost a round with a brick wall, then I am going to find Edward and you and God can go pester someone else cause' I want the ending I pictured a long time ago, got it?"
"I've... got it" he said gradually, like the words were unknown to him "But I can't allow it… I'm sorry."
Dean ground his teeth together "fuck you."
The angel grimaced at Dean's curse "Please understand Dean" he looked back to the ceiling, like it was the most amazing thing he had ever gazed at "But I have to do this..." he sighed "I don't want to... you deserve to forget all the pain but I have no choice." The angel looked back at Dean, his eyes flashed white just as his hand came to rest on Dean's forehead.
A blinding pain had Dean screaming in agony. But pain was not all he received. Images of his forgotten memories flashed in his mind, showing him things he did not want to remember. He saw his father dead after he had given his soul for him. He saw Sam dying in his arms. He saw himself selling his soul to save Sam. He could see it all so clear and it hit him so hard that he was like being hit by that Mac truck all over again. He struggled to stay conscious. His memories were creeping ever so close to the day he died. He didn't want to remember hell. Castiel must have heard him (because he was pretty sure he screamed it out) because his memories bypassed hell and went straight to him fighting with Sam because he was using his powers.
It all became too much. The pain, the memories, every emotion that went with them, it was maddening. He could feel the darkness lacing itself around him, dragging him down into the murky waters but he was willing to go with her. And by some luck she claimed him and he sighed in relief as he fell into the black.
When Dean woke he was alone in his hospital room. The never ending annoying beeps of the monitor had woken him from his pain-induced sleep. While in the care of the darkness it had allowed him to see more of his forgotten memoires. He remembered everything now and if Castiel thought Dean remembering everything was going to change how he felt he was dead wrong. The yearning for Edward was almost painful. He didn't feel complete without the pale skin teen he fell in with all those years ago. He didn't care that God had work for him, he didn't care that Lilith was breaking seals, why should he? He'd spent so much time doing everything for everyone else when the most important thing to him slipped through his fingers long ago. No, oh no, this time he was getting what he wanted.
He was going back to Forks. He was going to be with Edward. No angel, no demon, hell not even Sam would, could stop him. He was in love and nothing stopped love. Not even the swiftly approaching apocalypse, Lucifer or God.
Dean climbed out of the hospital bed, wincing as the movement jostled his sore muscles. Ignoring the pain he gradually got dressed, trying to be fast but not injure himself further all at the same time. Stiffly he made his way out of the room, creeping down the long white corridor; Sam must have been around here since the Impala's keys had been left behind. Hitching his duffle higher on his shoulder he ducked into the lift just as he saw Sam round the corner. He willed the elevator to move faster. Once the doors were open he took off, his injuries slowed him down but he had to move quickly. Sam, no doubt, would be looking for him already.
Someone must have been on his side because he made it to the car without passing out from the ache in his sore (and possibly broken) ribs. His baby roared to life, her purr easing Dean's tension. He gave one last pensive look at the hospital before gunning the engine and taking off in search of his lost love.
Sam paced the length of the motel room. He'd been doing this nonstop for hours and his legs were killing him but he couldn't bring himself to sit down or even stay still. He was a wreck. Dean had been missing for hours, he had left his phone in the hospital and Sam had no idea where he was heading. He shouldn't be out and about in his condition. He was lucky to be alive after what Alistair did to him. Hell he had lost his memory and would still be walking around with no idea if it weren't for Castiel, who, was not coming when Sam called to him. Sam didn't know who to turn to. He'd tried ringing Bobby but he didn't get an answer and Ruby wasn't answering her cell either.
Growing impatient he decided to summon her, he knew she'd be pissed but he didn't care. He had to find Dean. He made short work of the summoning ritual and a few moments later a young woman with blonde hair and tan skin appeared before him. She crossed her arms over her chest and jutted out her hip and tilted her head to the side. Sam strolled towards her, no time for pleasantries.
"I have to find Dean."
"And you think I know where he is?"
"I don't know what else to do" he snapped. "Dean woke up with no memory after he got the crap beaten outta him by Alistair and he was babbling on about some guy called Edward and Forks" Sam threw his arms up in the air in frustration. "I got Castiel to restore his memory but now he is gone."
Ruby laughed "Oh Sammy, Sammy" she sighed deeply "Don't you know anything about Dean's dirty little secret?"
Sam crocked his head to the side mirroring the demons early expression of confusion and irritation "what are you talking about Ruby?"
"Well where to begin" she walked, with hips swaying, towards Sam and sat herself down on the small table "Once upon a time Dean went to Forks to kill some vampires, only he met someone" she paused for dramatic effect.
"Who?" Sam asked when she didn't continue.
"Edward Cullen" she smirked, revealing her hosts perfect white teeth "a young vampire and Dean's former lover."
Sam blinked once, twice, three times "what?"
"Yeah, I didn't know he swung that way either" she shrugged absentmindedly "but he does. Anyway to cut a long story short, a hunter named Jason Woodson started hunting the Cullen's, so Dean being Dean played the hero and got banged up pretty good and lost his memory of his time in Forks" Ruby leant back and stretched, exposing her well toned stomach. "But that's not even the most shocking part."
Sam, bewildered, replied "what could be more shocking then the fact my brother dated a male vampire."
She lent forwards, this time exposing her cleavage "He asked to become one."
Pleas review =)