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"What is a weed, anyway? A plant nobody planted? A seed escaped from a traveler's coat, something that didn't belong?
Was it something that grew better than what should have been there? Wasn't it just a word, weed, trailing in judgments. Usless, without value...
~ Janet Fitch
Preface : Torn
Scarred by personal tragedy, Bella & Edward are two broken kids in foster care who meet under tragic circumstances. When the world wants them apart, fate seals them together. Can they fight to stay together? And at what cost? This is the story of two children, ages 16-18. Through struggles there is triumph, but with every triumph, there is sacrifice. (That is why the finished product is called a reward.)
*Rated M for: Lots of Angst, Drama, Sex (Lemons), Cursing, Drugs, Physical Abuse, and more. NO RAPE, NO SLASH. All Human. OOC.*
(As always, links for Twilighted thread and chapter goodies in profile!!)
*** POSSIBLE TISSUE WARNING ***
To my faithful Readers.... thank you for giving me a new opportunity to present a different kind of story. I hope it intrigues you, inspires you, and that you will give it a real chance. Please provide all the feedback you can, keep me motivated to finish this beautiful story I see in my mind. Because I honestly feel it needs to be told.
To my lovey Caryn (Jazz Girl), my Beta -- thank you for giving me your time, hard work, and dedication. You're a wonderful beta but you're an amazing friend. We're at it again!! GASP! ILYSDM.
To Aura (Rebecca's Mom) for helping me out with the tid-bit's, for encouraging me, and for getting the Twilighted thread going for me! I owe you BB! You know how much ILY!
Disclaimer: I own nothing that is Twilight or Stephenie Meyer related. But I'll gladly take Rob if you'll let me have him. (And I busted my ass to write this, so do not take what is not yours and post somewhere else.)
"You've got wires... going in. You've got wires... coming out of your skin.
There's dry blood on your wrist... you'll draw blood on my fingertips.
Running... down corridors through automatic doors...
Got to get to you. Got to see this through.
First night of your life, curled up on your own.
Looking at you now, you would never know...
I see it in your eyes. I see it in your eyes...
You'll be... all right."
Preface : Torn
My chest burned hot searing flames, like I had swallowed down a bitter poison. It ate me alive, excruciatingly slow.
I wasn't sure how I could still move. The water was freezing. My stomach ached. My legs were heavy, solid lead, trying to gild me into the ground, to keep me locked down.
But I couldn't stop.
Something was moving me. Something beyond my control. Forcing me to fight.
I kept pushing, moving, running. All the while, I begged God to let me reach him in time.
"Edward!" I screamed desperately. My voice was scratchy, like an old broken record. Harsh and raspy. I was so exhausted. If I had the chance, I'd curl into fetal position and sleep for a week... I couldn't even remember the last time I had the opportunity to do that. I had to continually remind myself not to give up.
I saw him running toward me, over the hill and down the pavement, toward the same ocean surf where I was. The police officers shouted in the distance, calling after him. They begged him to come back. Shimmers of light marked his coppered hair as they struggled to find him in the darkness. With each flash, I caught a glimpse of the torn boy desperately struggling to make his way to me. I noticed the smears of blood beneath his busted lip, the black circles beneath his tired green eyes. The brown bruise on his cheek that I had caused without knowing.
Each mark, every bruise, all the pain... it hurt my heart just as much as it must have hurt his body. That emotional pain reinforced the physical. I felt it all. All he felt, all he was. His struggle, his sacrifice. His pain was my pain. We were in this together. No matter what, our connection would remain solid.
I screamed his name louder, refusing to allow myself the defeated sign of tears. I had to push, to continue onward. I had to make it to him. I couldn't break down now. He depended on me.
"Bella, stop!" Miss Evenson was behind me, and her shouting reminded me she wasn't too far away. "Stop!"
I sensed her on my heels.
I'm not going to make it, I thought. They're going to take me back before I get to him.
No! The other side of me countered. You have to make it, you can't do this without him. You've made it this far, Bella, just keep pushing. Almost there, you see? Almost there!
The distance between us shortened and lengthened simultaneously. My chest panted, my heartbeat grew heavier. Everything felt nearly frozen. The icy water crashed around my ankles, trying to weigh me down. But I couldn't let it drown me. I wouldn't let anything consume me. Not again.
"Edward!" I whimpered, almost falling over the crash of the surf, head first into the frigid blue beneath me.
His angelic voice shouted my name, just as strained and desperate. I heard him panting and growling. Listened as his shoes hit and screeched across the ground until he reached the sand. He was that much closer to me. We were almost together again. His voice was what pushed me to keep going. The sand flew around his ankles as the beams from the flashlights on top of the hill hit him. "Bella, don't stop! Don't listen to them!"
I barely heard them calling behind us. Both parties were on opposite sides, wanting the same thing. To keep us apart. They demanded we stop where we were. All I tried to focus on was him.
He was what led me.
I screamed out his name.
He shouted mine back.
"Edward!" I cried again, falling to my bruised knees as I tried to push myself out of the surf. The ocean roared loudly at me. I crawled, panted, continued, ignored the sting from the sand flying up in my eyes as I struggled to pick myself back up. I tripped several times, each time my drenched clothes collecting more sand, more dirt, more weight. I wouldn't stop.
The gap between us was closing fast, and I could taste him and feel him before he was even there. The memories of him flooded back to me, and for a second, I felt relief.
"Bella!" he shouted, his voice shaky and cracked. "Bella, Bella!"
As soon as we were close enough, I jumped at him, throwing my arms and legs around him, the sand flying up and around us like a bomb had exploded.
I knew I was crying, possibly even screaming. I felt pulverized. Angry for what the world was putting us through, but blessed to feel just the slightest bit relieved that we were holding each other again. I heard all the pain and the struggle rip through my burning throat, threatening to never end. I couldn't stop the tears from pouring from my eyes. Nor could I stop my hands from gripping him tight, as if I was holding on for my very life.
"Shhh, don't cry," he said, though he was sobbing too. "It's okay."
"Don't leave me! Don't let them take you!" I begged.
"Bella, we'll never stop being together, I promise you. We'll find a way."
"EDWARD CULLEN!" The police officer shouted, and over his shoulder, I saw them coming down the hill.
"BELLA!" Miss Evenson called behind me, and I heard the K-9's barking. "I see her, we got her! Paul, keep going, box them in!"
This was it. The end.
I screamed desperately, locking myself tighter to him. "What are we going to do?!" The terror in my voice made it all the more raw.
"We'll find a way," he reassured me again, struggling to keep his cool, convincing me he didn't have any other answer. "Hold on tight to me."
"I am," I whimpered, the salt from my eyes falling down my cheek and covering his heated neck.
"Don't let me go, Bella. No matter what they try to do to us."
"I won't let go of you," I vowed breathlessly. "I won't."
I felt his arms tighten around me, his fingers lock against the back of my shirt. I heard him whimpering, begging, praying, "Don't tear her from me again, God, please. Don't take her from me. I'll do anything, anything please."
"Edward," I cried as I saw the men getting closer to his back. "Please stay with me."
I knew it wasn't possible. I knew what they were about to do. But I couldn't help but beg, hoping that maybe someone in Heaven above would hear my cry and, for once, one time in my life, let me have what I so desperately needed. I prayed that there was a Heaven above, somewhere. That all of this was for a reason.
"Please stay with me."
"I'm not leaving you, Bella. Ever!" He pulled his face back, and his eyes were as broken as I knew mine were. But that despair and pain quickly turned to sheer rage. "Look at your face, God... What did he do to you?!" His scream was ferocious.
I shook my head, swallowing down the fact that it wasn't important. I wanted to tell him but I felt something hard hit us from the side, knocking us both down into the sand. We held onto each other despite the police and all of the adults grabbing us, trying to rip us apart. They pushed me to my stomach but my fingers grasped hold of Edward's red and black flannel shirt, latching on tight.
Edward growled and grunted, punching a male officer in the nose in order to move him off of him. Then he turned swiftly to his side and caught my wrists. "Bella!"
They hollered, shouted, and moved in closer. They pinned us deeper in the sand. There was nowhere we could go.
"Bella! Fuck, get off of me!" he shouted, trying to crawl toward me, to get the other man off of him. He couldn't fight. They were all too strong for us.
I cried as pebbles and rock filled my mouth, hair, and eyes. I prayed that my fingers would be strong enough to hold my entire weight.
I felt Miss Evensons' hands around my waist, and then they began to tug on me as she screamed, "LET GO OF HIM! Bella! This is for your own good, I promise-"
"LET GO OF ME!" I cried, desperate, clawing at his shirt, trying to get a better grip, feeling the strain on my fingernails.
A loud growl roared from his chest. His teeth bared, his face was angry, pleading, and exhausted. I felt his fingers loosen. The yanking on his pants and around my waist made it harder for us to hold on. They were threatening to taze him.
"Don't fucking let go," he shouted desperately to me, his eyes burrowing into my soul. "Please!"
"I'm trying! I'm trying!"
"Bella, shit." His fingers were losing. "Shit. Shit! Shit!"
"Get his hands!" the officer behind him shouted, noticing where we were interlocked. "Taze him if you have to."
"NO!" I begged as more people grabbed hold of my body, pulling me away. "No! No, no, please! NO!"
I heard the ripping before I actually saw the tear.
And then we were apart, a piece of his shirt crumpled in my bloody fingers. I curled my hand around it, clinging to the last piece of him I had.
"Bella!" His voice echoed in my ears, drowning out every other noise.
As soon as we lost contact, I knew it was over.
All I heard was his shouting and my heavy, hollowed, burning breaths. Everything moved in slow motion, the weight of the world finally settling in on us. It covered us up and closed the lid.
I watched helplessly as they yanked him by the back of his shirt, up from his stomach and over, onto his butt. They pulled him away from me kicking and screaming. The tears fell from his bottom lashes, down his angry face, onto his cut lips.
I watched as he called for me, knowing there was nothing I could do, that either of us could do. "I'll find you again!" he promised, the last of his words ringing in my ears. "One day soon, baby, you're going to open your eyes, and I'm going to be there! We'll be together. Don't give up on m-"
"Shut up!" Someone said, silencing him with a blow to his gut with their flashlight, forcing him to buckle over. "Useless punk."
I winced and cried, absorbing his words for everything they were worth, as the police officers screamed and shouted commands. My fingers clenched around the tattered remains of his shirt, as if I could comfort him by holding it tighter. They lifted him up to his feet and drug him away from me, back up the hill, toward their waiting cars. Others stepped in front of me and blocked my view all together. They tried to talk to me. I stretched desperately to see around them but it was useless.
I couldn't see him anymore. And without Edward, I wasn't myself.
Their voices were simply a low buzz in my ears now.
Closing my eyes, I pulled in slow, ragged, faint breaths. The echoes of the police sirens, the voices, the surroundings all slowly dissolved. The only physical thing I could feel was the remnant of the fabric still clutched in my hand. It was precious to me now, more precious than my own life. As I exhaled, I screamed his name one last time, struggling and pleading with the world.
..It was useless. Done.
The demons had won. They defeated us and tore us apart, then left us shattered and broken. Again.
I fell over on my knees and wrapped my arms around myself, curling up into a ball, despite the fact that they were telling me to get up, that I was going back. Pushing my face into the sand, I whimpered. My face stung as my tears washed the raw, sand-scraped skin of my cheeks with salt. But no outward pain existed. It was nothing compared to what I was feeling on the inside.
...They may have taken this battle. But the war was far from over.
No matter the distance or the obstacles they tried to put between us, we'd never be lost. We'd never lose sight of each other.
And we would never, never give up.
-- Exhales slowly. I'm really nervous... Don't worry though, it's not all heartbreaking, I promise.
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