Diary Entry 5: Bubba
Oh my! I never knew exactly how popular I was until just a little bit ago. You see, me and my friends are headed for the hospital! But on the way I got myself turned around a little bit because of all the mean people coming from all over. I guess I was a bit lost, because when I looked around I couldn't see any of my friends at all, and I had to change the batteries in my flashlight. Well, unfortunately, I didn't know where to find new batteries! But then, luck would have it, as I went around a corner I met a really, really big guy! He looked kind of sick, and confirmed that he had a tummy ache, and was full of nasty cancer-like bumps, but when I asked him about batteries (most politely of course) he seemed to pause a moment, and then kindly led me to a stash of Duracells. Hooray!
This friend of mine had a hard time talking though. I asked him what his name was, and he only managed to gurgle, so I named him Bubba. I told him I was incredibly lost from my other friends, and he seemed delighted to help me! Bubba himself was quite popular, really, every time he got sick a bunch of his friends came. I think they were trying to make him feel better. The stomach flu is so awful! In the meantime I dug out some Tums from my first aid kit and made sure he had a few as we took our breaks.
Eventually I could hear shouting and gunshots on another street, and Louis crying out my name in a very worried tone! I told Bubba that sounded like my team, and he was ever so happy to jog along with me to find them. As soon as I came around the corner to introduce Bubba, Mr. Bill went and blew him up!
It was bad enough he blew up my friend, but then I was covered in this nasty green gooey stuff from head to toe. But then I found all of Bubba's friends wanted to be MY friend really badly too! So while they piled onto me for a group hug, I could hear my team mates all yelling and stuff. Well, eventually, all those huggers seemed gone too, and I could finally see since all the goo wore off. My team members asked me where I had gone and told me to stick closer! I think they were a little jealous.
That's okay, though, I'll always remember Bubba, because he was a swell guy. I'm sure being dead is preferable to having the stomach flu that bad anyhow. We're almost to the hospital, and Francis says he hates protecting me while I write, so I better stop here!