Chapter Name: Two Hearts
Thanks to the reviewers: Freddie is a G (dude/dudette, get an account please, so we can reply back to you), Invader Johnny, teasers, keylimepie, maybecreddie, Creddie fan addict, iLoveiCarly, HollzHatter.
PrincessStrawberry: I just write how I think they would react to whatever situation I've placed them in.
thanh-doan: Thanks, I welcome constructive criticism, I went back and read over it again, and I can see where you are coming from. I'll try to improve this in my future works. Thanks :D
Drag0nL0rd: Angry Freddie is fun to write. There are a few things that are 'fun' to write, like spazzing out Carly, drunk Spencer, and some stuff which is harder, like emotional Sam, or Carly trying to deal with Freddie's feelings, so it's nice to have the fun stuff with the bad.
Did I just say I loved her? Fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK! Carly's just going to think I'm jealous all over again. All that effort to make her happy, to only be the friend she wants me to be, right down the drain. I kept going. Maybe she didn't hear, or she would just ignore it.
When I was nearly to the door I heard her cry out, "Freddie.. wait."
I froze. I heard Carly walking over towards me, then I heard her sniffle. Great. I made her cry. I knocked my head on the wall next to the door.
"Freddie.. turn around." Carly then helped me, taking my hand and twisting, I followed her motion and turned.
"Do you mean it?"
"Mean what?" I sighed, I knew where this was heading.
"You said you love me. Freddie, when you said that, did you mean it?"
"Carly. I..." I didn't know what to say, should I lie and say no, or say yes and open myself to another round of torment and rejection.
"Tell me. Now." Carly stepped forward, and I backed up against the wall.
I looked down at the floor, ashamed. "Yes. I'm sorry. I let my emotions get the better of me, I tried keeping them hidden, but it's true."
I felt her fingers, smooth as a rose petal, but warm like sunlight, on my chin, as she lifted my face up to lock our eyes together. Carly bit her bottom lip, and before I knew what was happening, Carly had stood up on her tip-toes, and pressed her lips against mine. Before I could say anything, she took my hand, intertwining it with her own, and dragged me back to the beanbag, indicating for me to sit. I did so. Carly curled up beside me. It felt so right.
"We need to talk." Carly looked at me and smirked. I could tell that had Carly had a proviso in mind.
The proviso being that the talk could wait a little while, Carly had to have know I wouldn't ever be satisfied with just that one, tiny, peck on the lips. I unhooked one of my hands, and cupped her face with it, pushing her down onto the beanbag just slightly, to arch her neck before me. I took in her sweet scent, a faint mix of fruit and flowers that comprised whatever her body scrub was made up of, before pressing my lips against her exposed skin, as Carly's mouth opened, her eyes closed.
Without pause, I smoothly trailed a figure 8 pattern, occasionally stopping to leave faint kisses, ever so gingerly caressing her delicate skin. Carly mewed, and I kissed her a dozen times all over the silky skin of her neck, as her breath hitched Carly purred and I'd do whatever it took to hear her make that noise once more. I made my way up to her velvet lips.
I hovered above her, and she called "Freddie.." I licked my lips, and waited until she breathed in again, when she did I crushed my lips onto hers. That kiss was wonderful, magical, amazing, and we both knew it. I slowly brushed my tongue over her top lip, Carly countered by biting my bottom lip, as I continued back down to the center of her mouth, where we both met each other.
Carly shyly retracted her tongue back into her mouth, leaving just enough of a gap that I was encouraged to ask for entrance, after poking though, I was allowed to deepen the kiss even more, Carly tasted amazing, it felt like no other girl had made me feel before. I knew that my feelings weren't misplaced, that this was an absolution, a confirmation, a vindication of my love, a release of the pain I swallowed down for her benefit.
Just before I felt my lungs were going to burst, Carly broke apart, her chest heaving up and down, her face red and flustered, parts of her beautiful hair sticking up or out in different places, as we gulped down fresh air.
I'd always thought that, at least in regards to kissing or making out, it was never as much about being some especially brilliant kisser, or having a series of "moves" laid out and practiced, as it was about being with the right person. Sure, the "moves" was part of it, but even with the other girls, I could tell that some were just more compatible than others, there was a flicker of light, or the spark of striking a piece of flint, but nothing more, even though I had more fun with them than with girls I felt no spark at all.
With Carly, it was like someone had set off a nuclear bomb.
"Wow." It looked like Carly felt it too.
"Do you know how beautiful you are?" It was an earnest question, I saw how she compared herself, to the girls on tv, in the magazines, I wanted her to know I'd have her over them any day of the week, any month of the year, without hesitation.
"Oh Freddie, stop." Carly became bashful, looking over and away from me.
"I mean it." I gave her a peck on the cheek.
"I know." Carly returned the favor.
"I think I know what we need to talk about." It wasn't too hard to figure out. Now I'm fairly sure I wasn't going to get rejected again, so I think I'm cool with whatever it is.
"Freddie, why did you wait till now to say anything? That wasn't the first guy who hurt me."
"That's right, but those were your decisions to make. I wasn't going to say anything when you went out with them, and then you broke up with them."
"Why him then?"
"I couldn't watch as he tried to twist you into accepting blame for his behavior. If he really loved you, all he'd care about is being with you, and anything else would be a bonus." I could wait a million years for Carly if I had to.
Carly continued. "That time you stormed out and slammed the door in Sam's face, I didn't know what to think. When I saw you look at me, I saw your anger, I felt hurt, but I knew I shouldn't because it wasn't fair to feel like that when you were just protecting yourself from suffering."
I wrapped her in my arms again, and squeezed her in a hug. "Carly, my feelings for you never went away, I just got tired of the rejection, sick of making you feel sorry for me, bored of Sam's taunts. I didn't want to have to keep being outwardly jealous, pitied by my friends for chasing an unattainable goal, to be able to try something different. It might make me a coward, but I saw how happy you were with those other guys, at least for a while, and that made me happy as well. But you made it perfectly clear you didn't want me. I couldn't keep throwing myself at a brick wall."
"I took you for granted Freddie. After that night, for the first 6 months, I was happy. You moved on from me, I didn't have the pressure and strain of having to watch my words, Sam had one less thing to start fights with you about, but it changed."
"I missed it." Carly looked reflective, as if she was remembering past details and moments. "I kept expecting the guys I was dating to be like you, to tell me I was beautiful, to talk to me like I an equal, to treat me nice, no matter what. Every time though, they would hurt me in different ways. I'd compare them to you, and they would all come up short."
What could I say, nothing. I could only smile, happiness flooding inside me.
"Freddie, every time I came back to you, I was hoping you would tell me again, that I could see that look in your eyes again when you used to tell me you loved me, but I didn't. I thought you'd given up on me. I cried because of it. I hated myself for pushing you away. That I was too stupid to see what I was missing out on. I couldn't ask you myself, not any more, not after causing you all that pain, after you finally let go of me. " Carly whimpered, and I held her tighter.
"It's alright Carly. I'm here now." I swept my hand along her shoulder.
"It took me over a year before I realized. When I saw you with those girls, and I got so jealous. I saw how nice you were to them, saying all the things you used to say to me, and it made me ill to think you had been saying that stuff to me for years, and I just acted like it meant next to nothing."
"Do you want me to start again?" Carly nodded her head, yes.
"I love you Carly." I smiled at her, using my thumb to wipe off the water under her eyes, from the tears that had just rolled down her cheek.
"Freddie.. I.." I put my finger over her mouth.
"Shh, Carly, you don't need to say it. I know you might not feel that way for me right now, and you can't force it, you need time to figure it all out, it won't feel real if you say that now. Just think of it like a tap, dripping way, drip, drip drip, that you put a bowl under. When it fills up, you will know. You will feel it. Just remember that I love you, and you are with me now. That's all that matters."
We both sat there, for maybe 10 minutes, just holding each other, occasionally I'd kiss her, or she'd kiss me, or we would talk about a past moment, not wanting to leave each other's arms. I'd be able to stay here for hours if she let me. The elevator dinged, indicating someone was coming up. We quickly stood up to attention.
"What if it's Spencer?" Carly exclaimed.
"What if it's Sam!" If Sam had seen me in the position we were just in, she'd run over and kick me in the junk.
Carly took my hand, and it calmed me down. "Freddie, we'll tell them."
"Are you sure? I don't want to rush you."
"I've been waiting a year for this. I'm not waiting any longer."
The elevator dinged, and out popped the blond headed demon, Sam Puckett. As she finished eating her sandwich, she looked both of us over. I instinctively pulled my hand away, only for Carly to squeeze it tight, stopping me from breaking the hold.
"Ello, ello, ello, wot's all dis den guvnuh?" Sam spoke, doing her best impression of an old-timey English policeman.
Carly spoke up after taking a breath. "Me and Freddie are together now."
Sam walked over and smacked me on the head. "It's about time Benson. I can't believe you didn't notice how jealous she's been lately." Well, she was right, I didn't see a thing. I didn't have a clue. I was in fact, clue less. All I'd seen is Carly throwing herself at completely unsuitable men, and not how she saw me in return. It had taken a cheating bastard to finally force myself to reveal my feelings all over again.
"It's the truth. By the way, I heard a rumor that Steve cheated on you with another guy in the toilet at the Groovy Smoothie a few days ago, although I don't think that matters anymore."
We both turned to and looked at each other, a smirk formed on our faces, then laughed out loud for close to a minute.
"What?" Sam inquired.
"Never mind Puckett. It's close enough."
"Sam, I thought you went home?" Carly asked.
"My mother called me, said she was having 'friends' over. I decided to sleep over tonight, so I came back. I tried calling, but both your phones were off."
Carly fumbled around in her pocket, she must have turned it off sometime during our conversation. "Mine broke. It had an accident."
"Poor dweeb, your diddly phone brokey-poo? Looks like you'll be visiting nerd central to get a new one soon. Say hi to the dorks for me." Sam Puckett, charming as always.
"Say what you like, I don't care." Nothing could break the good mood I was in.
"Whatever doof, I'm going to crash on the couch. Bye."
Carly called out to her before she left, "Wait, Sam, if you see Spencer, tell him about us."
"Fine. But you owe me a smoothie Benson."
"I'll buy you one every day for a month."
"Wow, I like this new Fredweirdo, you should've done this a long time ago Carly." With that, Sam smiled, and bounded down the stairs, her long hair swishing as she moved. I always feared what Sam thought of me, and how that would impact on what Carly thought of me, how could anyone blame me, with how she treated me.
I think in her own twisted way, she thought she was doing it for my own benefit, even if I didn't agree. I'd get teased, told off if I did anything wrong, but I knew down in that strong heart of Sam's, that if I kept Carly happy, I'd be keeping Sam happy.
Carly turned back to me, looking coy, her right foot lifted, going back and forth pivoting on her toe, her hands outstretched in front of her stomach, and she batted her eyelashes at me, "I'm tired Freddie, can you carry me to bed?"
I picked her up, her face tucked into the crook of my neck, my arms linked, one holding her legs, another holding her waist and back, I kissed her once more, before moving down the stairs. "I really need to work out some more." Carly playfully hit me on the shoulder. "Yeah, you could do with a little muscle."
We laughed, as I took Carly into her bedroom, when I turned on the light-switch, the room was flood with pale pink and white, a few teddy bears sitting on her bench tops, brushes, containers and lipsticks in front of the her makeup desk. I stooped just slightly before the bed, opening up the large blanket, and gently placed Carly down on the mattress.
I pulled the covers over her, and went to leave, when Carly spoke up, somewhat groggily, "wait, Freddie, I want you to stay with me."
"Are you sure? What if Spencer finds out?" The last thing I wanted was for Carly to get in trouble from Spencer, I was pretty sure he didn't allow guys to stay in her bedroom, especially not over-night.
"It'll be fine, please stay." I turned the light-switch off, and flicked on a desk lamp next to the bed.
I took off my shoes and socks, and the jacket I was wearing. Luckily I was wearing comfortable pants, and boxer shorts, and not trousers with a belt or anything like that. I was about to take off my shirt, like I always did when it wasn't freezing cold, and this was a more expensive, designer shirt, rather than one of my old, striped polo shirts I normally wore to bed, but I hesitated.
"It's okay Freddie." And it was. I placed it on the nearby desk, and pushed under the covers. I lay flat on my back, looking up at the ceiling. I felt Carly snuggle up beside me, just like she had when I carried her down. Her body was so warm, and our position felt right. It felt natural, as natural as anything could ever be.
"Goodnight Carly." I yawned, getting sleepy as well.
"Goodnight Freddie," and she was out like a light.
I'm certain this was the way everything was supposed to be, that this was perfect, that I was made to be here, with Carly's arm draped across my chest, and Carly was meant to be there, head alongside mine, gorgeous as ever, my dark haired sleeping beauty, I knew nothing could take that away from us, not now, not ever.
I reached over to turn over the lamp, when I heard the noise of creaking floorboards, just outside Carly's room. The knob turned slightly, then all the way, when the door opened, Spencer's head popped in, both hands in front of his eyes. I knew why, but even though I'd thought about it, I'd wait, I wanted to go slow, why rush into anything, why risk pushing Carly into something she might not want to do? I was fine with just being with her, like this. I didn't need anything more.
I suppressed a laugh, and spoke to him. "It's okay Spencer, you can open your eyes, just be quiet, Carly's asleep." I looked back over and Carly, watching her body rise and fall gracefully with every breath. Spencer opened the door, and walked in, casting a long shadow across the wall behind him.
I watched him split his fingers together, just enough so he could check the scene before him, and then he relaxed, and put them down by his side.
He raised his eyebrow at me. "No shirt?" This wasn't going to be some long, heart to heart brother to boyfriend conversation, not now, but I saw happiness etched on his face.
"Do you wear a shirt to bed?"
"No, but that's different." I'll give him that. I thought about telling him I was only wearing my socks, but that wouldn't be appropriate. Plus I think Carly would want to be awake to see his reaction.
"I'll treat her right Spencer."
"I know you will kiddo."
"Are we cool?" The last thing I wanted was to anger Spencer, or cause problems between him and Carly, as her guardian, I craved his acceptance.
"We'll need to talk some more tomorrow, but yeah, we're cool. Carly's finally realized she had the right guy in front of her all along, make her happy, that's all I ask."
"Thanks Spencer, that means a lot to me."
"No worries, you deserve it, night Freddo."
"Goodnight Spence." I watched him leave, creeping out, he closed the door without any noise and went back downstairs to his room.
I kissed Carly's cheek, flicked off the desk lamp then drifted off to sleep. That constant pain was gone the next morning.
AN: Again, thanks to all the reviewers, hoped you liked it. If you leave a review, I'll try to answer any questions you might have.