What happens when you force a pure Army guy to go on vacation into a civilian setting? What if the guy is BeachHead, the most Army you can get in a guy... and the setting is Scarlett's family? How does Snake Eyes like going on vacation to her family? And with his fellow instructor along?

Reviews are appreciated. Although there will be a lot of BeachHead, as one of my favorite, little used characters.. there's going to be a lot of Snake Eyes and Scarlett. I'll be introducing Scarlett's family, and I took a few liberties with the number of sisters, but I think I stayed pretty close to canon overall. They would know she is in the military.. but not the details.

I hope you enjoy!

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Psyche-Out sighed and gave Hawk a serious look. "This can be a real concern. I've been part of several cases where soldiers that are long term career people just plain forget how to deal with every day life, if they aren't exposed to it on a regular basis. It's just not an issue, until something unexpected happens. What if they are injured and have to be medically discharged? Suddenly they are thrust into a world they can't deal with. Plus, it's not healthy to be only reliant on the average Army life, without ever seeing the outside."

Hawk leaned back in his chair. "You have to realize that normally I would totally agree with you.. but in this particular case.. I really believe it's a case of too late. He would probably make a very good study for you to show what happens when a person does submerge themselves in only Army life for years..."

Although the psychologist's eyes lit up, he suddenly narrowed them. "Nice try.. but I'm not convinced it's too late, and don't try to sidetrack me by offering up studies to write up. I want this man off duty, and off the base, for at least a week. And not off to a training facility.. I saw that trick used about four years ago. He needs a mandatory leave.. into a urban, civilian setting. Send him home to family, or on a civilian cruise, or disneyland for all I care. As long as it's non-military."

Now Duke groaned. "Psyche-Out.. while I do appreciate that you're trying to look out for his best interests... BeachHead doesn't WANT to leave Army life. He eats, drinks, breathes and lives Army. He went in young, and has been in since. He doesn't want to 'experience civilian life' and he certainly doesn't want a mandatory leave forced on him." The doctor began to protest, and Duke leaned in, looking to check that Hawk's office door was still closed. "Look... I'm going to be candid with you, knowing that it won't go any further than this room. Beach is a great soldier. Honestly he is. He'd be a horrible civilian, he doesn't want to be a civilian. And... and I mean it, this goes no further.. but Hawk and I tried to force him on a vacation, only a couple years ago." Hawk suddenly groaned and put his face in his hands. "Yeah.. Hawk remembers. We ordered him off base for 48 hours, told him he would not be admitted back on base until then, and that was that. Do you know what happened?"

Psyche-Out thought about it a few seconds, putting together the personality with the files he'd read up on. "My best guess? He found a bar, got drunk, got into a fight, and was hauled back in cuffs by the MP's. Am I close?"

Duke smiled grimly. "Not even in the ballpark. He argued until Hawk made it a direct order... then he marched out to the front gate, stepped off exactly 10 feet from the outer fenceline, and stood there at attention for 12 hours straight. That's when Hawk finally caved and went out to let him back in. The man does. Not. Want. To leave. He's so Army, if you cut him, he'd wait for orders to bleed, and then he'd bleed olive drab."

Psyche-Out suddenly leaned forward. "What if I told you, I already have a plan.. and I've already talked to one willing conspirator?"

The two officers looked at each other, then at the doctor who sat smugly. "Well... " Hawk hesitated. ".. it can't hurt to hear your idea..."

* * * *

Scarlett smiled widely as she walked to Hawk's office. She had sort of hoped this would be approved.. and now it seemed it had. She glanced over at Snake Eyes, casually striding alongside her, completely unaware of the plan hatched by her and Psyche-Out. She knocked once, and entered the office at Duke's "Come."

"Scarlett and Snake Eyes, reporting as ordered sirs." She and her companion snapped salutes, and relaxed to the 'at ease' stance when told to. "Am I to assume you have approved our discrete plan?" She watched Duke roll his eyes up to the ceiling.

Hawk sighed heavily. "Yes.. despite grave misgivings about the entire deal, I will be entrusting our best drill sergeant to you, for a short holiday. One week, and please... don't break him too thoroughly. We do need him."

She gave the stunned Snake Eyes a grin. "Not to worry Sirs. My family didn't break Snakes here.. they'll be gentle to BeachHead too."

Now Snake Eyes protested. *BeachHead? To thanksgiving? With YOUR family?* His exaggerated signs emphasized that he shared the officers misgivings. He twisted to look at all of them.

Scarlett nodded. "He'll do just fine. He hasn't got anywhere else to go, Snakes.. you wouldn't begrudge him a family meal and some time off.. would you?"

He stood still for a moment. *Your family will eat him alive. He's never wanted to go with you.. with us.. to your family before.* He turned to the psychologist. *This is you.. you are making him do this, aren't you?*

Psyche-Out nodded. "It's for his own good. BeachHead needs time away from the stress here."

The ninja protested. *He likes it here, and he likes the stress.*

Psyche-Out shook his head. "His medical charts show a progressing issue with stress levels. It's fine now, but it's begun a unhealthy upward climb, and if he stays here under constant stress without any time to decompress, he'll end up giving himself serious health issues, like a ulcer, or even a stroke or blood pressure problems. He's a healthy adult male.. under a extremely high amount of stress constantly. Every single day. Even when he's not being sent out on missions, he's stressing out with the training regimen. Or he's winding himself up to a tight coil with the trainees, or the Joes.. it's too much. Given a week to relax, and unwind in a calm, family, urbane setting, and he'll do much better."

Snake Eyes turned accusingly to Scarlett. *Calm? You DID tell them what your family is like.. right?*

She scowled. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Hawk interrupted before anything further could be said. "Well, it's settled. BeachHead is hereby handed over to your care and custody until you make it back from the thanksgiving holiday leave. Hopefully intact."

Snake Eyes glared at the general as well. *You make him sound like a hamster*

Duke grinned. "No.. he bites more than most hamsters.. and he's probably more likely to escape."

*Great.*

* * * *

BeachHead wasn't taking the news well. Snake Eyes winced at the level of volume he was reaching as he yelled at Scarlett and Psyche-Out alike.

"WHEN I WANT TIME OFF, I'LL ASK FOR IT! I DONT NEED ANY VACATIONS, ESPECIALLY NOT WITH SOME HOITY TOITY RICH FAMILY IN OO LA LA ATLANTA!!"

Scarlett's eyes narrowed. "My family is not 'hoity toity' and you don't have a choice. Hawk ordered you to accompany us, off duty. So you're going to go, and you're going to enjoy it."

He drew breath to yell more, and Psyche-Out butted in. "You really should just give in now, unless you want to go yell at General Hawk. Since he wrote the orders, Scarlett hasn't got any more choice than you do."

That silenced him briefly. His eye fell on Snake Eyes seated a few feet away. "You! What exactly did you have to do with this stupid plan?" Snake Eyes pointed at himself and shrugged elaborately. "Oh right.. like I'll believe you weren't in this up to your sneaky ninja eyebrows."

*I had no idea until half an hour ago. I think it's a bad idea.*

"Danged right it's a bad idea! Wait... you don't want me to go?" Snake Eyes shrugged and BeachHead stuttered slightly but went on. "Well... it IS a stupid idea. I got greenshirts to train, and half a course to rebuild, the stupid tank instructors let one of the newbies run a Mauler over the end of my obstacle course. Besides.. I don't WANT to go!"

Psyche-Out shrugged carelessly. "Too bad. You are ordered to go with Scarlett and Snake Eyes on a holiday leave.. not to be less than one week in length, and you are to accompany them to the family celebration.. not go to a different base, not go training in the desert, not to stand guard outside the main gates. Civilian life, holiday celebration, no army, no training, no soldiering, and that's the orders. For the duration of your approved leave, Scarlett can be considered your unit leader, and she's in charge. No arguments."

BeachHead fumed overtly, pacing back and forth. Suddenly he stopped and turned sharply.

"I could.."

The psychologist shook his head. "No."

"But you could.."

"No."

"What if I promise.."

"No."

"Can I.."

"No."

"This is INSANE!" Twisting around, the sergeant stomped away, growling and snarling under his breath.

Snake Eyes turned to the other two. *That went better than I expected*

Scarlett put her hands on her hips. "Shut up you. You can go help him pack."

*Wonderful. If I get shot on vacation, I'm blaming both of you.*

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End chapter. Yes.. before anyone asks, this will be another long fic! I already have approximately 20,000 words written on it. It should be mostly amusing, but it'll reveal some some deeper things, and yes, you'll get to see some awfully adorable Snake Eyes/Scarlett.

Reviews are adored.. and I'll try to think up some contests of some sort for prize fics as well.