Authors note: I am aware that there are pices of the song not here. At first that was a small mistake on my part and after that I just let the song work with what I was writing. In reality, this is a belated birthday preaset for my good friend who's favorite couple is SoundwaveXBlaster. Happy b-day Ari-kun!

Other note: The song "I Will Survive" does not belong to me. Neither do Soundwave, Blaster, or Megatron. I'm just playing for a little while, I'll give them back soon.

At first I was afraid

I was petrified

Kept thinking I could never live

Without you by my side

I was terrified, I admit that. How was I supposed to live without my lover? My best friend? My leader? Megatron was everything. He was more important to me than Cybertron could ever be. I would gladly give my life for him. He was the first one to show me what love was like, and now he was abandoning me. Leaving me with what had been mine in the beginning. Nothing more, and probably a lot less. What was I supposed to do? Optic fluid rushed from my eyes as I watched him walk out of our shared quarters for what I knew was the last time.

But than I spent so many nights

Thinking how you did me wrong

And I grew strong

And I learned how to get along

But time passed. He didn't come back. And I started to remember how he used to treat me. How I thought the way he used to hurt me was part of love. But now… Well, now that I was bothering to think it through, how could what we had have been love? He constantly depended on me. If he fell, I would catch him before he got hurt. But he would never catch me. I looked at myself in the mirror. And after a while, the look became a glare. I had spent too much time wallowing in self pity. I smiled as I made a new decision.

:Blaster?: I commed my old friend. He'd been begging for me to come outside and hang out for too long. :Is that invitation from you still open?:

:When you comin' over?: He answered. My smile grew.

And so you're back

From outer space

I just walked in to find you here

With that sad look upon your face

It was a few months later I came home to find Megatron on my couch. He'd been away on a mission to explore the universe a little more. I glared at him. He had this sad look on his face. Only a few weeks ago that look would have made me crumble in an instant. But now, I felt nothing for him as he opened his mouth. I cut him off, deciding to make sure he understood that what we had was over.

I should have changed that stupid lock

I should have made you leave your key

If I'd known for just one second

You'd be back to bother me

"Get out. Leave your key card." I growled. I should have changed they key pad outside my door to one that wouldn't recognize that card of his. I probably should have made him leave the key card the first time. Had I known he would take so long to come back, and that he would only be a nuisance by the time he did, I probably would have. Hindsight is such a fragger.

Go on now go

Walk out the door

Just turn around now

'Cause you're not welcome anymore

Megatron put his key down on the table nearby, but he didn't leave. He started toward me, away from the door.

"Go. Now. Turn around, you aren't welcome here anymore." I told him flatly. He stopped, anger making his cooling fans switch on. He clenched his fists. Than he spun around and left, slamming the door behind him. As soon as he was gone, I fell to my knees. My legs had become useless in the aftershock of my fear. I'd been positive he was going to rearrange my faceplates, if not worse.

Weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye?

Did you think I'd crumble?

Did you think I'd lay down and die?

Oh no, not I!

That night as I settled on my recharge birth, I remembered how he'd ended our relationship. How he'd smirked at me knowingly. I realized he thought I'd come crawling back. He thought I'd forgive him. He thought I'd crumble into nothing without him. The thought made me angry. Did he really think I was that useless? That I couldn't survive on my own? Well, his tone had certainly been filled with confidence…

It took all the strength I had

Not to fall apart

Kept trying to mend

The pieces of my broken heart

The next day I realized how badly Megatron's return affected me. It made me realized how much I truly did love him. I spent most of the day trying to regain the confidence I had had. Trying not to break down and fall to pieces again. I wanted to fix this spark break, but I wasn't sure how. Maybe I just needed some company, someone to love me back in some form, weather it be friendship or more.

And I spent oh so many nights

Just feeling sorry for myself

I used to cry

But now I hold my head up high

I started to become strong again. But there were still many nights spent alone in my berth, wallowing in a pool of self-pity that should have swallowed Cybertron. I used to leak enough optic fluid on those nights to fill a thousand energon cubes. I started glaring at myself in the mirror, making myself hold my head up. Trying to get the 'bot reflecting back at me to stop dwelling on someone who was not worth their time.

And you see me

Somebody new

I'm not that chained up person

Still in love with you

I started going out more with my friends. It helped a lot. Their support helped me feel better. Sometimes I would notice Megatron out of the corner of my optics. I'd make sure to ignore him. And I started to make sure I did kind things, not just when Megatron was around. Giving someone a few coins when they were begging always gave me a good feeling in my spark. I never used to do things like that, Megatron had always though the poor were disgusting. It was part of my healing process, to do little things that Megatron would have hated. I was becoming a different robot, and I was glad.

And so you felt like dropping in

And just expect me to be free

But now I'm saving all my loving

For someone who's loving me

I guess I never really expected Megatron to give up so easily. Whenever he wanted something, he would have it. Still, when I opened my door to see him there one day, I was shocked.

"Busy this afternoon?" He asked casually. I could tell in his voice that he was expecting a no. I was glad to have a surprise for him.

"Yes actually. I have an important date that I need to be getting ready for." I answered. It was true. I was going on a date with Blaster. We'd been almost together for about a month, but neither of us had said the words to make it official. Either way, Blaster was showing me what love was really like, and I would never be able to thank him for all that he did for me.

Go on now go

Walk out the door

Just turn around now

'Cause you're not welcome anymore

Megatron's optics grew cold and angry. He growled and moved to enter my house. I growled as well, moving to stand more firmly in front of the door. Megatron glared at me, as if he were trying to kill me with that simple look. I'd received that glare before, and for once I didn't submit.

"Get. Out." I ordered.

"This wont be the last you see of me!" Megatron promised in return. He whirled around and walked away. I glared after him until I couldn't see him anymore. And than I closed and locked the door.

Weren't you the one who tried to break me with goodbye?

Did you think I'd crumble?

Did you think I'd lay down and die?

Oh no, not I!

This time I didn't fall. I returned to my quarters to finish getting ready for my date with Blaster. I even managed to shove the incident out of my mind before Blaster came. Blaster was healing me faster than any medic could have. It was the first time I realized exactly how much I needed the red robot. And that night, I even managed to vocalize the fact that I loved him. And he even said it in return!

I will survive

Oh, as long as I know how to love

I know I'll stay alive

The war came into my life swiftly. For a long time, Blaster and I remained neutral. We didn't want to join a war. Not when we had just created sparklings. Our little cassettes, as we called them. We tried our best to raise our children in a home filled with love, but the war was straining everything. In the end, Blaster and I chose different sides of the war. We each brought some of our children with us. We all knew we'd be okay. We love each other to keep each other strong, not matter how far we were.

I've got all my life to live

I've got all my love to give

And I'll survive

I will survive, oh

We would often meet. Each time it would be secret. We told each other about how the 'bots around us lived and worked. Each time I came closer to joining the autobots.

Those meetings always made me feel alive again, and the cassettes enjoyed the small amounts of time that we were a family once more.

Serving under Megatron made me change the way I spoke, just to annoy him. I acted differently as well I know its behavior worthy of a sparkling, but it made me feel better in those long days where Blaster and I couldn't be together. Megatron seemed to have given up on me. I was too changed at this point.

I survived the longest of the decepticons. Probably because I was the only one who gave a slag about someone else. Caring for the cassettes and having them to care for me are what has kept me going. And now that I have officially surrendered to the autobot and am with Blaster, my life couldn't get much better.