Stefan and Vladimir belong to Stephanie Meyers... The frat boys and sorority sluts are mine.
This was a contest entry on another site... I wont know if its a winner for another 2 weeks.
"You do realize what day we will be arriving on, don't you?" I asked Stefan as the plane lurched away from the tarmac and into the skies.
He rolled his eyes and answered, "Yes, brother, I am aware."
"The worst day to be in America." I told him.
"It will be fine, Vladimir." He muttered.
"Hmph." I leaned back in the chair and glared at the movie on screen.
Halloween. Once a deliciously bloody event it has become a commercialized piece of crap where children dress up as Hollywood monsters and run rampant in the streets for candy. I hope they all get run over, the disrespectful imps.
What a horrid time to take a vacation.
The Volturi have been breathing down our necks since that spectacle with the Cullens a few years back. That was the sorriest excuse for a battle in history. After all that preparation I didn't even get to kill anyone. Anyways, Aro has had his eye on us since then, looking for an excuse to have us terminated. Not that he'll find one, we never break the rules. His interference in our lives is merely irritating. Which of course explains our vacation from Europe.
I don't even know how the Volturi brothers are still alive. Aro is a flamboyant, manipulative, pompous tool. Cauis is so uptight he could pick up a penny off the floor with his buttocks. Marcus is like a foreclosed house; the furniture is still there but no one is sitting in it. One would think their followers, all of whom are powerful in their own right, would turn on them.
I should just be glad the Cullens aren't the ruling class. Can you imagine? If they had their way we'd all be eating bunnies for breakfast and making out with teenage girls.
We landed in New York with and headed to Manhattan. We had a home away from home set up there, not far from Columbia University. The close proximity to the school might have explained why a pledge of Alpha Delta Pi was lurking on the street corner. He was easy enough to ignore until he stopped us in our tracks.
"Hey, man," He said stepping up to us. I wasn't really sure which one of us he was talking to but I was tempted to correct his statement. I was no man.
"My name is Jimmy, I am a pledge of Alpha Delta Pi fraternity at CU, and part of my initiation is to get 10 strangers off the street to come to the Halloween party at the ADP house. I been standing out here forever man, I'm down to two. Would you sign the list and make an appearance tonight?"
I was about to tell the punk to take a hike but Stefan stepped in.
"We'd love to!" Stefan answered reaching for the boy's clipboard and signing our names.
"Thanks dude, you rule! See you tonight and wear a killer costume!" He waved and took off jogging.
"Brother, you cannot be serious."
"Oh, Vladimir, why ever not? You must admit the dimwit was brave approaching to vampires, and isn't this a vacation? Let's play nice with the living and later we can share a pledge."
He better not be kidding. I have not had a pledge since 1946.
We arrived at the frat house which was already crammed with college kids dressed as monsters. Before we could even knock on the door it swung open. I nearly burst into laughter. I suppose I should have expected but still… The young man at the door was dressed Dracula. Dracula who was a fictional character based on Vlad the Impaler… or if you prefer Lord Vladimir. Me.
"Hey, your not from the college. Are you one of the pledge recruits?" He asked.
"Yes," I answered. "Stefan and Vladimir arriving as invited."
He glanced down at a notebook and checked off our names.
"One of pledge Mary's guests."
"Actually," Stefan answered, "his name was Jimmy."
The frat boy's face darkened as he stepped aside to allow us access.
"Stephan, I think we may have gotten pledge Jimmy in trouble."
"Yes, we may have." He agreed.
It was not long before Stefan and I got separated in the crowd of drunken holiday debauchery. I wound up in what looked like a dining room, where two witches and a Malibu Barbie were table dancing under a cheap chandelier.
"Hey, nice costume." Slurred some boy half past sloppy on the clock. "What are you supposed to be?"
"My brother and I have come as imitations of the Volturi scum." I shook my head and allowed the hood of the cloak to fall back.
"Nice," he said taking a swig of his beer. "So you like what you see?" He gestured to the dancers. "That Carolyn's got some big--"
What was with these humans? Had all of them drunk away there self-preservation?
The one approaching me now was female in a blue checkered dress and pigtails at her feet trotted a little Scotty dog. The dog took one look at me and stepped in between me and the girl and started barking and snarling.
"Oh don't Coco! Behave! Please behave!" As her attention turned downwards I pulled back my lips and snarled down at the petulant creature. It whined and took off in the opposite direction.
"I am so sorry about that," the inebriated Dorothy said to me. "He is usually so well behaved." She moved in closer and stroked my arm. "Perhaps there is someway I can make it up to you, hmm?" She whispered seductively.
It had been awhile since I've bed-fed as Stefan so charmingly called it. Who needs a drunk pledge? Her skin would be soft…
I leaned in to except her offer. "Why beautiful lady, I do believe--"
"Vlad!" Stefan shouted at me stomping over.
I looked up at him in shock. He was covered head to toe in some strange sticky orange substance… "Brother, is that silly string?"
He ignored the question. "I have never been so insulted in all my millennia! We are leaving. Now!" He was yelling at me as he tried to pick the debris off of him but it clung maliciously to the fabric of his cloak.
"I hate this holiday!" He growled.
My eyes flicked to Dorothy who was still clutching my arm in her delicate hands.
"I am starting to enjoy it," I told him.
"Balderdash! Let us take our leave!"
"But brother…" My eyes traveled over my all to wiling victim.
I sighed and removed myself from her grasp.
"Fine, but lets take pledge Mary with us at least. You did promise…"
"Oh, alright, but do hurry up…"
Why you ask?
Why the hell not I say.