Okay so I'm not dead. But I do have a mild case for writer's block. This oneshot is inspired by the song "I Fall to Pieces" by Patsy Cline, aka, Goddess of all music. I don't know why I've never associated this song with Seddie, but it is totally perfect. I hope you enjoy.
iFall To Pieces
I fall to pieces,
Each time I see you again.
I fall to pieces.
How can I be just your friend?
You want me to act like we've never kissed.
You want me to forget, pretend we've never met.
And I've tried and I've tried, but I haven't yet.
You walk by and I fall to pieces.
Please don't follow me. Please don't follow me. I try to duck around a locker blank so he can chase another lanky blonde down the crowded hallway. I can't do this right now. I can't even LOOK at him right now.
I lean out a little to look over his shoulder and make sure he has disappeared. When I don't see his messy brown hair peaking out, I breathe a sigh of relief. I turn back just in time to see him try to jump out in front of me.
"Hey Sam!" he says a little too cheerfully as he leans against the wall. I think I know where that energy drink I left in my locker went.
"What?" I said miserably, wishing with everything I had that he would just go away.
"Why were you running from me?" he asked, ignoring my attitude.
"The same reason every girl runs from you. Your face."
"Oh I get it," he whispered conspiratorially, "Are you on the rag?"
"What does THAT have to do with anything?" I yelled, smacking him in the shoulder. "And NO I am NOT!"
I tried to walk off, but he followed close behind me, "Guy trouble?"
"None of your buisss-ness," I sang, as I darted between other students to avoid him.
He was able to get around me to stand in front of me with his longer legs and I crossed my arms angrily. I could only take so much more of this.
"Are you alright Sam? You seem extremely aggressive and…Sam-like," I slowly started walking again, and he followed me like an inescapable shadow.
I walked a little faster, hoping he would give up and asked, partially-kidding, "So my name is synonymous with bitchy?"
"Do you really want the answer to that?" he asked, cutting in front of me, smirking.
Suddenly I was pissed all over again, and I shoved him out of the way, "Don't you know when you're not wanted?!"
"I don't know, do you?" I stopped in shock. I knew it had probably been a slip of the tongue, but his statement hit home. Do I know about not being wanted? I could write a fucking novel.
I stormed off, my cheeks flaring, and he tried to follow me, but I spun on my heels, "Benson, if you take one more step, I swear to bacon I will strangle you with your own esophagus!"
He stopped in his tracks and I was finally able to escape, down the hallway and into the calm of the girl's bathroom, where I sat in the handicapped stall and cried for most of the next hour. And I have never felt less "wanted" in my life.
He was trying to talk to me, but at this point, I knew that if I heard his voice, I was likely to fall apart again. I still wasn't sure my cheeks weren't red from before. But to hell if I was going to cry in front of him.
He came over and tugged one of my headphones out of my ear before I could stop him. It hung in his motionless hand as I shot daggers toward him, and he looked just a little scared. As long as he thought I had the upper hand, I'd be fine.
"Don't test me turd," I muttered through gritted teeth. He seemed amused.
"You fail most of your tests anyway," he said, smirking before dropping my headphone and walking away from me, toward his stupid camera, still smirking.
And I had had enough. Within seconds, I was across the room, pinning him to the floor, trying to stop my hair from falling over my shoulders.
"Benson, sometimes you're not worth the ground you walk on," I growled, trying to terrify him, but today he seemed horribly fearless.
"Unless you sold my organs on eBay, right?" he said, cracking a smirk. I wanted to slap it off.
I hopped off of him, and crossed the room, trying to hold my feelings in. I've been doing that a lot lately. He hovered near his tech set-up and stared at me.
I could tell he was debating whether or not to make another time-of-the-month joke, measuring the statistics of losing a kidney in the process. If he had, he probably would have lost both. But he just sat there, smirking.
"Do you have something to say Fredward?" I said through gritted teeth.
He just shook his head, "Nope Sam, just waiting for you to explode."
And with that, I did exactly what he predicted. I darted across the room and started hitting him. I punctuated each word with another hit to his chest, hoping to break a rib or two. Maybe then he would know the pain I felt just looking at him. The nub.
But he used his strong arms to hold me back, just a few inches, where I couldn't hit him. My arms fell feebly to my sides and angry tears pressed at the corners of my eyelids.
"Can't you ever just stop?" I said weakly. His smirk dimmed as he stared at me.
"Stop what?" he asked dumbly.
I chuckled sickly as tears started to fall, "Everything. Breathing, living…taunting me with just being there. Knowing that you really don't care. That that…amazing…kiss meant absolutely nothing to you. Knowing that even thought you're the closest I've ever felt to anyone, there's always someone else on your mind."
His arms dropped from my shoulders in shock, and I couldn't help but stare at him. He wasn't doing anything. He just stared back. Then the inevitable happened. He smirked.
"So, you thought the kiss was amazing?"
I groaned, exasperated, "That's all you got from that? I pour out my whole fucking heart into a punch bowl, and that's all you get?"
I was getting all worked up, and suddenly the tears were coming faster. I wanted to crawl into a hole and die, never to be found.
"Shh, Sam," he said quietly, as he cupped my cheeks, wiping the tracks of my tears away with his thumbs. I looked into his eyes nervously as he continued, "I was only kidding."
"About what?" I asked hesitantly.
"About everything. Can I tell you a secret?"
I nodded as he leaned toward my ear, "I love you."
I caught his eyes and did the only rational thing a totally pent-up teenage girl could do in this situation. I fell apart. I couldn't stop crying, and I'm pretty sure it was starting to scare poor little Fredward.
He pulled me toward him and I had no choice but to cry into his shoulder. I could feel the vibrations as he chuckled softly at how ridiculous I was being. And I really couldn't blame him. The last time I'd cried was after that stupid chili fiasco, and every tear I'd had pent up since then had chosen NOW to present itself.
"Shh, Sam. What are you crying about now? I said I loved you…" he said, rubbing my back to calm me down. I managed to chuckle through my tears.
"That's why I'm crying you dork! You just turned this into 'Pride and Prejudice!' You just managed to turn my perfectly non-cliché life into a RomCom!"
I pulled back and wiped at my eyes sheepishly, as he shook his head, "Sam, you are so bizarre."
"That's why you love me," I said nervously, trying to calm myself down. I hadn't meant anything by it, but his face went serious and he nodded.
He took a step forward, fully knowing that I was frozen where I stood. I could feel his breath on my face, and I was afraid I was about to fall apart again. But there was no way I was going to screw up a moment this perfect.
"You still haven't said it by the way," he whispered, one hand brushing hair away from my face, just preparing for what was now inevitable.
My eyes went from the slight pout of his lips to the mischievous glint in his brown eyes and I couldn't go against my instinct any longer. I smiled and whispered, "I love you too."
He smirked before capturing my lips with his, holding them for the longest moment of my life, before pulling back abruptly.
"I'm sorry. I was being cliché again…" he said, grinning.
"Oh, shut up and kiss me you nub!" I said, pulling his face back down to meet mine. I found myself caught up in his arms, his scent, his kiss…
Who knew he could find another way to make me fall apart?
Hmm, I'm trying to figure out. Did they totally switch roles, or did Freddie finally grow into himself? I don't know. Come on, either way, it was pretty damn cute. And can I just say, that due to the current state of things, this song is totally PERFECT for Seddie. Just saying. Please Review.