Here it is!! I appreciate all the emails wondering where I was. There will be a song list for this but I couldn't find songs for this chapter to make it worth my effort. I hope you enjoy it as much as I have had writing it. A big thank you to my beta sweetishbubble. Check her out she rocks.
BPOV/ JANUARY 2ND
"Alice I don't see why you bought me so many clothes? What am I going to need a sequined halter top for, or for that matter a leather jacket? The way you and Miss Kellie had things all laid out I would say you know what Edward has planned for us." I sat on the couch in our comfortable living room.
The past couple of days had been a whirlwind for me. When we decided to leave tomorrow it put Alice into a frenzy, which meant us going shopping. She kept her word though and she bought what I liked, though that damned sequined top she was adamant on. She let me pick out my own lingerie, as I knew what I liked. I just hoped Edward would like it too. Edward had spent the last few days in his office so we could enjoy our time together with no worries. Angela and Ben had changed their minds again and decided not to go on their honeymoon till after their wedding. I felt at ease leaving them in charge while I was gone. We didn't have much on the books but what was there I knew they could handle it. On top of all this running around we had been doing I had to go in and see my doctor for more tests. I was worried as to what the tests would say but lucky for me I had a great doctor that was very open with me. I was on pin and needles waiting to find out what it all meant. I was used to being poked but during all the shopping we had been doing I knew there was a black cloud looming over my head. Edward was adamant that he was to go with me. We had our first real argument over it when we talked on the phone last night. He told me that he wanted to be with me every step of the way and would love me no matter what the doctor told me. I loved him for saying it, but in a way it scared me that things were moving too fast between us.
I looked over and saw Alice checking things of the list she had made for me. She wouldn't let me look at it and had already started packing for me. There was one thing that I still needed to find but she told me Edward wanted to do it himself. I imagined what it would be like to go shopping with him. He was so at ease compared to Alice. She was like a tornado that never stopped spinning till it was over with. I put my plate in my lap and started eating. Alice went on with her business and then sent off a text to I assumed was Edward. She closed everything and sat there watching me.
"Bella you know I am dying here, throw me a fucking bone will ya!" She started bouncing and then she noticed the scowl on my face and calmed down.
"What do you want to know Alice? All I know is she wants to see me and discuss my options. I know what is coming and it scares the shit of me. You know Edward wants to go with me and that scares me more."I looked over at her as I took a bite of my sandwich.
"Bella, he loves you and you do realize he is in for the long haul no matter the outcome. Give him some credit. He loves you and would do anything for you." She put her hand on my thigh and patted it.
"I know that Alice but I don't want him to feel pushed into anything. Marriage is huge but having children is even bigger! I am scared I am going to wake up from this wonderful dream and realize that it was a huge colossal joke. I know he has told me that he loves me and doesn't care if our children are biological. But I can't help that deep down inside he wants a little Edward running around. This is such a mess." I put my lunch down and wiped the small tears that were starting to form.
"Bella I really don't see him running for the hills after everything you two have been through together. Believe me when I say this he is not going anywhere and I see a ring on your finger soon." Alice tapped the side of her head and I just laughed at her. There was an odd silence between us and I knew she was going to ask about New Year.
"Did Edward figure out that the blushing has effects on other parts of your body?"I nodded at her and she laughed.
Alice knew what my blushing did to my body. She had figured it out the first time we took a bath together when we were small girls. Ever since it has been a secret between her and I.
"I think he loves my blushing even more now that he realized it doesn't stay on my face. That night all the walls we had both put up were broken down."Alice pulled me into a hug and kissed my cheek.
"Just remember the road you take together may have its bumps, but they are there for a reason. Rose is waiting for us to keep her company then you can go to your appointment. I noticed you made extra lasagna, can we take it over to them?"
Alice explained to me that Emmett had to go into the office to check out new hires for the crew that was needed. I grabbed a quick salad to go with the lasagna too, because I knew they would be hungry eventually. Rose was pretty much sticking to home now. There was no alarm about the babies coming, but I had this feeling that our baby shower would include two more guests. Alice and I walked over carefully as ice covered the driveways and sidewalks. With all the snow we had received it had turned cold but beautiful. Alice knocked and then went right in. This was as much their home as it was ours. It was nice to have family right next door.
Emmett kissed Rose and ran out the door. I think I heard him tell us thank you for the food but I was not sure. Rose was lying on the couch shaking her head at her crazy man.
"Thank goodness he is gone. I love him but he is making me crazy! Every damn move and he is ready to pounce. Bella I know you are leaving, but Alice get Jasper to take him out before I ring his neck." She moved so the pillow wasn't behind her anymore.
We both started giggling because we could both see Emmett being over protective. We all knew he meant to help, but if it meant stress for Rose he needed to knock it off. Alice said she would work on Jasper, but then said they would need help moving so he would be close but out of her hair. I made up her a plate of dinner and watched her eat. Rose wanted us to join but I told her I would get something later and Alice was going to dinner with Jasper.
We sat there and talked about everything. Of course New Year's Eve came up. Rose wanted to make sure Edward was the gentleman he was meant to be. I just blushed and she knew that I didn't want to talk about it. I just said that I loved him more than ever and left it at that. We heard Emmett come bounding up the stairs and immediately started in on Rose. For the first time since meeting him I was pissed off at him. He started going off on where the pillow should be and how much water she had drank. I finally stood up and pulled the idiot into the kitchen. I left Alice and Rose in awe looking at us both walking off.
We stood there in the kitchen with him towering over me. I don't fucking care how big he is, but he needed to know what he was doing. I stood there with my hands on my hips and tapping my toes. The words were swirling around in my head but I had to do this with care.
"Emmett, do you realize all your doting on Rose is bugging the ever loving shit out of her? You are making her nervous with all your hovering. There is a difference between taking care of someone and driving them fucking nuts! Ease off Rose and let her tell you what she needs. Emmett I love you, but, please you are all making us nervous."
He stood there looking at me with his eyes open and his mouth in a half drawn smile. He hugged me and picked me up. I squealed when he spun me around the room. He hugged me tightly and we both heard someone yell knock it off from the living room. We walked back in and Emmett knelt in front of Rose.
"Rose I am so sorry for driving you nuts. I am so worried about losing you and the babies. My life is all of you now but I am just so scared." He was there holding her hands while looking into her eyes with tears in his eyes.
Rose just sat there with tears in her eyes looking at him. Alice and I knew they had a huge epiphany dealing with all of this, and it was our time to go. They had some things to discuss and neither of us wanted to be in on that no matter how much we loved them all. Alice got up and gave them both hugs as did I and we left. I heard Emmett yell thank you as we walked out and told him anytime. We both heard laughter from them. Alice closed the door and we walked back to our home.
It felt weird calling it our home even though Alice was leaving it. I knew she had felt bad but I really was happy for her and Jasper. I just didn't want her so far away. With everything we had been through I finally realized that Alice was my sister more than anything. We still had our arguments but she didn't get away with her way all the time like she had. The silence between us was odd but there was nothing to say. I knew she was going to be gone when I got back and I had to deal with it. I didn't want seven days of bliss with Edward to be fucked up with thoughts of Alice. When we got back to the coach house I noticed my bags were packed. I sat on the couch and tried to make it look like the magazine in my hand was interesting. Okay, who thinks that an article on whether plaid is the new it color for fall or not? I don't give a fuck about it really.
Alice went upstairs to finalize my packing list and I threw the magazine over my shoulder somewhere. I was trying to figure what I would say if Edward did propose to me. The ring of the phone broke me out of my haze and I heard Alice yelling that Edward was on the phone. I picked up and whatever they were talking about abruptly stopped. I knew it had something to do with our trip and I left it at that. I heard Alice say she loved us and to have a great trip. She was going to dinner with Jasper and would not see us before we left.
"Hello beautiful, I am running late can I meet you at your appointment? Then we can get something to eat and relax. I planned an early morning for us." His voice always soothed whatever was wrong in my heart or mind.
"Edward that is fine with me and I really don't feel like cooking tonight." I was in a funk and he knew it. He didn't pry and told me he loved me more than life itself. We hung up and I told Alice to enjoy her evening and yelled back to enjoy my trip and not to worry. We both yelled love you at the same time and I walked down to my car. I slowly got in and drove to my doctor's appointment. I pulled into a parking spot in front and sat there. I couldn't make myself get out of the car no matter how much I wanted to.
When Bella told me her doctor wanted to see her before we left I knew it meant things were not going to be well. I wanted to be there for her no matter what the doctor said to her. I loved her and I knew I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life. I didn't want to rush things but the ring I found kept taunting me to ask her. Hell we could have a long engagement if that is what she wanted. I just wanted to hear yes come from her lips and see her beautiful brown eyes sparkle back at me.
I pulled into the parking lot and noticed Bella was still in the car. She was leaning forward with her head on the steering wheel just sitting there. I turned off my engine and climbed out to go rescue her. I knocked on the window and heard her scream. I quickly opened the door and knelt down to face her.
"Shit Edward talk about heart in my throat moment. " I could see her breathing hard and her chest moving. All I could think was take your brain off her boobs and comfort her.
"Bella I am so sorry for scaring you. I was worried watching you sit there as I know you. Everything will be ok. No matter what the doctor says I am not going anywhere. I love you." I pulled her hand into mine and kissed the scar on her hand.
"Edward I am scared as to what she wants to say. I knew this day was coming sooner or later. I was just hoping for later." She got out of the car and locked it. She put her arm around my waist and we walked in.
Bella's doctor was wonderful to deal with. I asked Rose about her and she said she was the best at what she did. She knew we were leaving for our vacation but wanted to see Bella immediately. I knew that it mean things were going to change and fast. The guard at the door let us in as he was expecting us. We took the elevator up and I could feel Bella's pulse get faster and faster. I kissed her temple to try to calm her down, but I don't think I helped much. Her doctor was waiting for us as we opened the door to her office. She told us to sit down and started looking through Bella's file. I saw Bella tense up as she saw how big the file was and I grabbed her hand to calm her down again.
"Bella we knew this day would come eventually but I hope it would be a lot later than now. The last blood tests we ran were low in numbers and it caught my eye. I went back and looked at all the past tests and your numbers are all over the place. My opinion is if you want kids you better start now. I don't know what kind of road you have ahead of you but it is going to be a tough one. I know you are with Edward but this is all up to you as to what steps you need to take."
Bella's mouth opened and then shut then opened again only to shut again. I could see her biting her lip and fighting the tears in her eyes. I decided to speak up as I knew Bella was over whelmed at this point.
"So what is the first step or test that we need to do?" I saw Bella's head whip towards me and just look at me. I was not sure if she was going to break into sobs or jump me right there in the office.
"Edward for you it is pretty simple, we just need to do a sperm test. That way we know how many sperm you have and what kind of motility they have. For Bella it is a bit harder, we already know how many viable eggs she has but I would like to run that test again. Some more blood tests so we get an accurate reading of her hormone levels and the other test is called a hystraselpingogram. I basically shoot dye and air up into her fallopian tubes to make sure there are no blockages or other problems. It isn't painful but it isn't a picnic either." She closed the file and looked at Bella.
"Bella this is all up to you, but the sooner we get going on this road then the closer you will be to having the baby you so desperately want in your arms. I know you are leaving tomorrow, but we can do this all when you get back. Bella you know I wouldn't be so alarmed if this was not important to you." I saw her get up out of her chair and kneel down in front of the love of my life.
"Thank you for doing all of this and I know I have a lot to think about. This is all too much at once, but I knew what to expect from our talks." She hugged her doctor and they talked about setting up appointments when we got back.
She shook my hand and hugged Bella again and told us to have a wonderful time. We left and Bella was absurdly quiet through the whole ride down in the elevator. I didn't know what to say to her but I did know that if she was going to have children I was going to be their father. I walked her to her car and as she got in she broke down. I pulled her out and let her cry on my shoulder. She held tight on to me as if I was going to disappear but I knew that I was not going anywhere. I flipped open my cell phone and called Jasper.
"Jasper I am sorry to interrupt your date with Alice, but can you get my car?" Jasper was worried and I basically answered his questions. My family knew about Bella's background and were extremely worried about her. Alice wanted to talk to her but I told her right now that was not the best idea. She said to hug her tight and that everything would be ok no matter what the tests were. Alice knew it was coming too, but I don't think she expected it to happen this fast.
We said our good-byes and I quickly locked my car up to join Bella. She had pulled herself into the passenger seat and was still crying softly. I let her cry and think and ponder. I was sure we had a lot to discuss when we got back to her house. I put my hand on her thigh and gave it a squeeze to let her know I was there just like always. I pulled into the garage and parked letting Bella take her time. She pulled herself out and slowly took each step one by one. She unlocked their door and went to sit on the couch. I closed the door behind me and I heard her voice.
"Edward I can't put you through this."
She sat there with red rimmed eyes and more tears flowing down her beautiful cheeks. When I told her I was not going anywhere I meant it. She was my forever and I had planned to ask her to marry me but not this fast. I walked over to her and pulled her into my lap. I just held her and let her cry it all out. Her mind and heart were battling with each other. I could always tell as she had this funny look on her face even when she did cry.
"Bella I know the news you got tonight was not the best, but we will get through it. Like I told you, I am not going anywhere. You are my life and my future no matter what happens. "
She looked at me through the tears in her deep brown eyes and I knew she had calmed down. She put her hands on my cheeks and kissed me softly. I knew things were going to be ok but making her think that was harder. I told her to go up and take a hot bath and I would fix us something to eat. She mentioned she didn't have much of an appetite but said soup would be ok. I told her not to worry about it and she went up to take her bath. I rummaged through her cupboards and found some homemade soup in the freezer. I put that in a pot to defrost and made us some grilled cheese sandwiches. It was not gourmet food but I was not like that and neither was the love of my life.
I heard the water run upstairs and took this moment alone to call my parents. I knew they were home and I knew they were waiting to hear what happened during Bella's doctor appointment. I grabbed my cell and rang the number I was so familiar with. I heard my mother's sweet voice on the phone and was relaxed enough.
"Edward is everything ok? Hang on let me get your father on the phone too. It will make things easier than me translate later." I heard her giggle and a phone being picked up in the background.
"I am here son. How is Bella?"
My father and mother were the center of our family. They loved us for who we were and what we have become. My parents were instantly in love with both Alice and Bella the minute they all met.
"Bella was basically told that if she wants children then she needs to start now. She is so upset and distraught over it. The only thing I could do was hold her and let her cry."
"Edward, are you sure you want to enter a marriage and children this fast? Your father and I both love her but this is fast. Do you know what you are getting into with all the tests and whatnot?"
"Mom and Dad I have never been more certain of what I want. I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Things are moving fast but we are not exactly the typical couple either. She is going to be fine through all of this but I am worried about the pain she will have to endure. The tests sound horrible and I am sure the drugs won't be easy on her either. I want Grandma Mcarty's ring. I always planned to ask her to marry me but even more so now. I will leave it all up to Bella but she is my life now."
"Son we are both proud of you and we are honored that Bella is going to be our new daughter. All of our dreams for our sons are coming true. We love you. Your mother is upstairs right now getting the ring out of the safe. We will make sure it is in the plane before you arrive. Have a wonderful trip and make it memorable for her."
My parents and I made some more small talk and we all said good-bye. I hung up and started plating the food as I saw Bella standing there looking at me. She looked a lot better but still sadness was there in her eyes. She walked over to me and put her arms around my waist just to hold me.
"Thank you for loving me and being there and putting up with all my crap." I tilted up her chin to look at her eyes and then kissed her.
"I would do anything for you Bella. Will you eat something for me please?" She nodded at me as she sat down to the table. I sat next to her and she put her feet in my lap.
We ate in silence but there was so much I wanted to say to her. I didn't want to make things worse or upset her more than she already was. She didn't eat much but I didn't push her and I quickly cleaned up the mess I made. Bella had a lot going on in her mind and I so wanted to be part of whatever decision she made. I wiped the dishes off and put them away. I noticed her turning lights off and locking the doors. It was late but not late enough that we had to go to bed. I let her lead me upstairs with her soft hand in mine. She went in and did her normal nighttime routine I was used to. I had to chuckle as this time there was no running water when she went the bathroom. I figured that was a huge clue as to she was feeling ok with me around now.
I climbed into bed with just my boxers on. I wanted to make love to her tonight but I knew that would be asking too much from her tonight. I wanted to ravish every part of her beautiful body but I knew we had time for that during our trip. I put my hands behind my head and heard the door open. I saw her standing there in the dark but she was so breathtaking. She was wearing one of my t-shirts and her bare legs glowed in the darkness. She crawled into bed and snuggled down into her favorite spot in my neck.
"Edward thank you for today and for being there for me. I don't know what to make of everything, but I'm glad you were there today." I felt her kiss my neck and snuggle down back into her favorite spot.
I knew that it was going to be a long night. I don't know who was going to get more sleep, her or me. I was worried about how she was taking all of this and how she was going to take me proposing marriage to her. I was not sure how I was going to do it but I had some ideas that would blow her mind. All I knew is where my heart was and I hoped hers was in the same spot.