I Need You Back

Chapter 1. Starry nights and bitter songs

He was perfect in every way. He held me perfectly, touched me perfectly and he even kissed perfectly. His looks weren't that horrible either. I sank back into his chest as I began to drift off to sleep. He had already passed out from the long day so I carefully slid into bed beside him.

He looked so peaceful and I certainly didn't want to wake the beast from his sleepy time. If you woke him up before he was ready, you better be prepared. Even with me he would lash out in some horrible way that I probably couldn't stand.

Once I was under the covers I wrapped my arms around his waist while he adjusted himself so we were presses so close together I could practically feel ever centimeter of him on me.

I smiled and buried my face into his chest and smiled but when I finally felt the air being constricted from my lungs I pulled back for a quick gasp of air. When I finally decided to look up at the one I loved before me I only saw…nothing. It was as if his face had been erased. Only a soft and smug voice came from the emptiness before me.

"You killed him…" the voice repeated over and over in my mind. The voice was rasp and terrible and most of all, horrifying.

I felt my body begin to shake when finally everything was gone and I was in blackness. I felt as if I were falling down a never ending hole until finally one more voice whispered through my mind.

"I love you…" the voice was like nothing I had ever heard before. A familiar and joyful voice that would make any girl smile but as the voice faded I felt my self fall farther and faster until…"BANG!!!".

I shot up out of bed gasping for air. I hated sleeping. It always brought on the unwanted images of my unknown past. I tried to remember the dream but I really didn't want to remember anything.

I could feel the sweat sticking to my blue spaghetti strap night shirt that I wore with my little white pajama shorts with blue polka dots on them. I wasn't feeling well at the moment so I decided to get ready, like I always did when I had a bad dream.

I pulled the covers off my body and tried to tip toe quietly across the upper floor room I was located in so I wouldn't wake Tsukasa Amakawa, my brother and legal guardian.

Once I made my way to my closet I pried open the door open quietly and pulled out my guitar. I was only wearing pajamas but at the moment I didn't care, even though it was incredibly cold out tonight.

After strapping my acoustic guitar onto my back I pulled on a pair of fur lined boots and dragged a heavy coat with me. My little ritual for bad dreams was always to follow one of my brother's many secret passageways and sneak into his observatory and play some music on my guitar to calm my nerves.

Music was one of the very few things I remembered from my past. I remembered bitter, heart wrenching songs that could tear a heart or shatter a soul in only moments. I shook those bitter memories out of my head and chose the secret door way under the carpet next to my bed. It was too cold to sneak out the window and I was too tired to jump down the two stories so I just decided to take it easy and take the long walk through the dark but warm tunnels that led from under our home to the observatory.

I pulled the removable rug off the wood floor and spotted the old black latch that was framed by the outline of the hidden door. I lifted the latch, trying very hard not to make any loud noises, and waited a moment to listen to see if Tsukasa-sama had awoken. I waited for ten seconds and then steadily lowered myself down the shallow tunnel. I carefully close the trap door behind me and began to walk.

Onii-sama must have been down here earlier because the lanterns lighting the tunnels were still brightly glowing. I sighing gratitude, because I would've forgotten a match to light the lanterns and made more noise, probably waking onii-sama.

I walked down the tunnels, hunching slightly due to the very low ceilings, until finally after what seemed like forever, I saw the little bit of star light an d moon light glowing brightly through the opening to the observatory. I easily slid my guitar off my back and threw it up onto the floor before pulling myself up and dragging myself onto the floor before grabbing my guitar and walking over to the long rows of blue seats.

I handled my guitar carefully as I began to gain the chills from the cold breeze seeping in from the open roof. I was grateful for my jacket and slid it on as I slid into a seat right smack in the middle.

I folded my legs cross legged style and pulled my guitar into my lap. I looked up at the beautiful stars for a moment and listened. Nothing but the wind surrounded me so I delicately placed my fingers to the strings and began to strum and sing softly to calm my nerves.

In the middle of the night ,When I'm in this dream It's like A million little stars Spelling out your name, You gotta come on, come on Say that we'll be together Come on, come on…Little taste of heaven

the melody quickly soothed my nerves and I began to sing the full song at my own pace. No more terrible memories of a past I didn't want to remember, or horrid dreams of faceless loves…just my music and the stars above.

When I finished my song finally, I sighed and looked up at the stars above once more. They were beautiful and practically the only thing I could really remember in my memories. I always had that one memory of just starring up at the stars for long periods of time.

I placed my guitar to the floor and squished my knees to my chest as I tried to stay warm. I starred up at the stars, wondering if I would ever truly forget and leave those evil dreams in my past.

I didn't realize I was dozing off until I heard something from beside the chairs. My head jolted up in an instant, thinking it could be onii-sama if he had awoken and followed me here, but when I looked there was nothing but darkness. I wasn't convinced though.

I spoke in a soft whisper, so low only cats could hear. "Who's there…?" I asked the darkness.

"It's just the wind…" a familiar voice made me smile into the darkness.

hahahaha! Cliffy! I will give you a hint, it isn't Ikuto and it isn't Tsukasa Amakawa! Oh well, you are all going to hate me for this but its okay! AS LONG AS U KEEP READING! Mwahahahahaha! Lol! REVIEW PLEASE! I love you all and I am soooo sorry it took so long for this one chapter to come up!