Well, I'm back. Miss me? ;)

I tried to get to all the reviews, but it got really confusing, and I think I replied to some of you twice and some of you not at all...sorry...If you want to know the reason why I'm so late, I explain it in my profile. Anyway, I've started college, so my priorities are like this: College/homework, job, writing my stories, and then replying. I'm sorry, but I'm a procrastinator so this isn't set in stone, if you know what I mean ;)
(SaiSaiLove and Kristellos, I'll review both of your arts as soon as I can - I'm really sorry it's taking so long, but I've been (and still am, honestly) busy. Sorry. But I will do that :) )

On another note: *.* 500+ reviews?-! *Faints* I'm unworthy! And I only just hit the halfway mark now. If I near 1,000 I'll...I'll... *Spazzs* ...You guys are awesome *-*

I don't own any of the characters/names/ect. Beta'd by Dragon, thanks for the help :D

Chapter 12
Best Man for the Job

Ember walked through the Ghost King's halls with a bounce in her steps and a wicked smirk on her lips, but she wasn't the only one. Her fellow apparitions wore similar expressions of eager malevolence. The only two not enjoying the anticipation were Dora and Wulf, Danny's two allies.

"You should have told Sir Phantom," Dora scolded them. "He has enough to worry about without being forced into a position he did not expect."

Ember laughed haughtily. "We are his enemies, 'Princess'. It's our job to make his life miserable—it makes our own enjoyable."

"The boy deserves it for abandoning us in the Dressing Room," Desiree added with a smirk. "We would have told him on the way to the Throne Room…If we felt like it."

"Yeah, so it's really the dweeb's own fault," Youngblood said. "He should have waited. Sucks to be him!"

"My only regret," Skulker said, "is that I won't be there to witness the look of horror on the Ghost Child's face once he finds out he's the Box Ghost's best man." Danny's enemies chuckled.

"That is a shame," Desiree agreed.

"Ain't that weatherman recording everything?" Youngblood asked. "We could commandeer the internet and watch it ourselves once this dumb party is over."

Ember hooked an arm around the young pirate's neck. "I knew there was a reason I liked you, kid!"

"Speaking of the Whelp's pet," Skulker said, "what are we going to do about him?"

"We can do nothing," Walker replied. "Like the punk, we are unable to touch the darn human."

"And even if we did manage to hurt him," Desiree added, "Phantom would surely carry out his revenge—truce or not."

Skulker nodded. "You have a point. But just because we can't hurt his pet, doesn't mean we can't strike at our true target."

"What are you planning?" Ember asked, smiling eagerly. Skulker's diabolical ideas where what attracted her to him in the first place.

"The Child is very protective of the reporter," Skulker explained, "but more than that, he is cautious over what the human hears and reports. He has many secrets he doesn't want the humans to know about. I say we…divulge some of those secrets to ease the pressure off the poor child's shoulders…"

Ember and the rest of Danny's enemies grinned maliciously.

Dora's eyes narrowed. "You have no right to reveal Sir Phantom's closely guarded secrets."

"I believe we went over this, Princess," Ember said. "We'll do whatever the hell we want, and there's nothing you can do to stop us."

"Oh!" Youngblood shouted, waving his hook in the air. "Oh! We can make a game out of it!"

Desiree rolled her eyes. "Do we look like children?"

"You are certainly acting like immature children," Dora murmured.

"Youngblood has a good idea," Ember mused. "Why don't we make a game out of it? The one who reveals the most of Danny's secrets wins."

"What are the rules?" Walker asked.

"A secret can only be exposed once," Ember said, "but it can be expanded on."

"Rumors," Desiree said. "Can we use rumors?"

"Only if they lead to one of the secrets being exposed," Skulker answered. "They don't count as actual secrets."

"The larger the secret," Ember said, "the more he fights to keep it hidden, the better. We want the dipstick to squirm."

"Sir Phantom's major secret is off limits," Dora said sternly. "The secret of him being only half ghost cannot be revealed."

Ember scoffed. "Where's the fun in that? That's the juiciest secret he has!"

"It's his main secret," Dora explained. "Once it is revealed, all others become obsolete."

Ember grimaced. "Fine. We won't expose his condition…not until the reception, anyway. Once the party starts to get old, it's anything goes!"

"What does the winner get?" Youngblood asked.

"Yes, what is the prize?" Desiree questioned.

"Bragging rights," Skulker answered. "For a whole year."

The other ghosts cheered.

Dora scowled. "Sir Phantom may not have many allies, but there are enough of us that you should think twice before playing this game." Wulf growled agreement.

"Oh please," Desiree said. "Who does the Child have? You, Wulf, the Furry Icicles, and his 'cousin'. I'm terrified."

Dora smirked. "You are underestimating him. He also has Sir Plasmius (in this instance), Queen Pandora, and Master Clockwork."

"Clockwork?" Ember's eyes widened. "He has a time master as an ally?"

Dora lifted her chin proudly. "Indeed."

"Who's 'Clockwork'?" Youngblood asked, scratching his head with his hook.

"He's the Master of Time, shrimp," Skulker said. "He answers to the Observants, but he's still incredibly powerful. How did the Ghost Child manage to acquire him as an ally?"

Dora pursed her lips. "The details are hazy, but I believe Sir Phantom helped Master Clockwork defeat a great enemy."

"The dipstick helped Clockwork?" Ember asked skeptically. "What could a Time Lord possibly need help with? Especially from a half human freak?"

"You can ask him when he arrives," Dora said in a dismissive tone. "I've told you all I know on the matter."

Ember flicked her unbound hair over her shoulder. "I doubt Clockwork will be interested in our affairs with Phantom, even if they are on good terms. Time Masters are notorious for staying on the sidelines. Our game is still on."

Skulker smirked. "And the Ghost Child better…beware…"

As Phantom stammered on the television, Paulina's heart beat wildly against her chest. She hadn't made the connection before, but with the announcement of Danny Phantom's role in the wedding, Paulina realized she would be seeing her future husband in her dream situation. Granted, he wasn't the groom and she wasn't the bride, but it would still be magical to see her Phantom taking part in a wedding.

Paulina blushed, smiling dreamily.

Walking down the aisle with her Papa at her side, Paulina glanced over the guests observing the procession. All the kids from school were there, the guys crying over the loss of their fantasy with her, and the girls watching in envy as she approached the altar. One girl in particular. Tears of jealousy and disappointment ran down her cheeks, because she'd waited too long and had lost her chance with her 'friend'. She'd tried to pull his attention away from Paulina, but once he met the real girl behind Paulina's façade, once he knew the real Paulina, he'd fallen head over heels in love.

Paulina smirked, and returned her eyes to her true love. Danny Phantom, beyond dashing in his black and silver tuxedo, smiled back at her, and Paulina's heart fluttered at the love-struck look in his eyes.

She ascended to the altar, but a strong grip on her hand stopped her from reaching her beloved. Paulina looked back at her Papa, and was touched to see tears streaming down his eyes. Phantom stepped forward, and grabbed Paulina's other hand. Papa switched his gaze to the superhero. Phantom smiled gently, nodded his head. Papa sniffed, but returned the gesture, finally allowing Paulina's hand to slip from his grasp.

The ceremony would pass by in a blur, Paulina too lost in Phantom's electric green eyes to pay any attention to what the priest was saying.

"You may now kiss the bride," the priest said.

Phantom smiled, and he leaned slowly toward Paulina. Her heart beat so wildly against her chest, she was afraid it might burst out of its confines. Phantom's eyes slid closed, and Paulina imitated his actions. She felt a coldness radiate against her lips, signaling how close the ghost was, and then—

"Are you insane?" Phantom shouted.

Paulina gasped, jolted from her fantasy.

On the television screen, Phantom shoved the Box Ghost away from him, looking confused and more than a little freaked out. "You can't just—Why would you even—Don't I—How could—" Phantom fisted his hands in his hair, and pulled on the pearly white strands. "Gahh!"

"Calm down, little badger," Phantom's father chided from off-screen. "You don't want to go bald on top of everything else, do you?"

Paulina shivered. What a terrible image. Danny Phantom without his hair would be like Paulina without her makeup—a crime against fashion!

"Shut up, Plasmius!" Phantom snapped. He pointed a shaking finger at the Box Ghost. "You! Why in the world would you want me for your best man? I—I lock you inside the thermos every day!"

"Your cylindrical container cannot contain the BOX GHOST!" the Box Ghost shouted.

"It's the Fenton Thermos, and you're missing the point! Why would you choose me of all people to be your best man? Why not Klemper? He's more of a friend than I am."

"NONSENSE!" Box Ghost floated closer to Phantom, but the Ghost Boy backed away a few paces in response. "You were there when I had my confusing obsession CRISIS!"

"The mechanical frog thing lasted for, like, five seconds!"

"You aided me in overcoming the EVIL Box's influence—"

"You mean you wanted to be defeated?"

"—which led to a BOOST in my already BOUNTIFUL bounty!"

"A side effect! It's not like I meant to!"

"You allowed me to escape Walker's PRISON of INFINITE PAIN!"

"That was just coincidence! I helped everyone escape."

"You…uh…Oh! You gave me the courage to—"

"Stop trying to deny it, Box Ghost! We aren't friends!"

"The fact that you knew what he was talking about each time, my boy," Plasmius said, "proves otherwise."

"Stay out of this, Vlad." Phantom ran a hand through his hair, breathing deeply to calm himself. "I lock you inside the thermos, I use you as an outlet, and I bag on you every chance I get. Why would you choose me out of every ghost here?"

The Box Ghost pursed his lips, and rubbed his chin with his thumb and index finger. "What you say is true. We are two souls, forever locked in an EPIC battle of WIT and powers that could tear asunder the very EARTH! We are archenemies, not best friends as the term Best Man implies!"

Phantom coughed into his fist. "Uh, I wouldn't go that far…"

"But a few days ago," the Box Ghost continued as if he hadn't heard him, "I myself wondered who should have the HONOR of being my Best Man. And then I came to a conclusion! My Best Man must share my talent for PUNS, and he must rival my powers in AWESOMENESS! The only ghost who matched this description of a worthy opponent in both fields, was YOU!"

Danielle giggled off-screen. "I told you those puns of yours would get you in trouble."

"When did you say that?" Phantom demanded.

"Just now."

"As a powerful ghost known throughout the Ghost Zone and the HUMAN World," Box Ghost continued, "you are worthy of this honor I have bestowed upon you! No one shall question the BOX GHOST's decision of choosing THE Danny Phantom as his Best Man!"

"What? Wait." Phantom held up his hands. "Basically, you're saying you chose me because I'm popular?" The Ghost Boy tilted his head to the side, expression perplexed. "Wow. Far cry from high school…" he whispered just loud enough for the speakers to pick up.

Paulina clamped a hand over her mouth. The Ghost Boy hadn't been popular in high school? But he was so charming and heroic! How could those teenagers be so blind? Paulina shook her head. That was their loss; she certainly saw him for the amazing guy he was.

"And powerful!" Box Ghost added. "But more than that…" he leaned towards Phantom, gesturing to the boy to do the same, like he was going to tell him a great secret. The Ghost Boy hesitated, but floated a little closer to the groom. "I chose you because…I WANTED YOU TO SUFFER!" Phantom jerked away from him with a gasp, his hands clamped over his ears and a pained grimace on his face. The Box Ghost laughed manically, his laughter rolling with nasal undertones. "MUHAHA! I am so evil!"

"Dang it, Box Ghost!" Phantom hit the side of his head a couple times, like he was trying to restart his ears. "Could you possibly yell louder? I don't think you busted my eardrums yet!"


"STOP IT!" Phantom crossed his arms over his chest, and glared at the Box Ghost, his eyes roving over the ghost in front of him like he was trying to figure him out. Paulina took the time to do so herself.

Paulina didn't know the ghost on a personal level like she knew Phantom, but the Box Ghost was a familiar face. Out of all the enemies Phantom fought, none were as known by the Phan community as the Box Ghost. Not because he was particularly dangerous, but because he was the ghost that drew Phantom out into the open the most. Paulina herself had once staged a stakeout near a warehouse full of boxes in hopes that the Box Ghost would appear and lure Phantom to her location. It hadn't worked for her—and it'd been an awful experience because the warehouse had been near the docks, and the salty air had totally dried out her skin—but there were many success stories circumventing the Phantom Phan website.

The Box Ghost was stout, and completely unattractive, especially when standing next to the hot Danny Phantom. But Paulina had to admit, once you got him out of those dusty, raggedy overalls and into a proper suit, he went from ugly to…decent. He had replaced the beanie that was usually perched on his head with an old-fashioned top hat, and his suit was similar in design to Phantom's, except his had red undertones and ruby red trimming. Paulina assumed the colors were a personal request, because she couldn't imagine why the fashionable Lady Hairdresser would clash that color of red with the Box Ghost's blue complexion.

"…not very evil." Paulina shook her head, bringing her focus back on Phantom. His voice was so melodic she hadn't noticed him speaking earlier. "What's so bad about being your best man? I mean, sure I'm surprised—shocked, really—but I'm not mad or anything."

A sigh floated through the speakers, and Vlad Plasmius came on-screen as he walked toward his son. Although Phantom was floating a few inches above the floor, Plasmius was still able to see over his head. If genetics ran true, Phantom would grow to be just as tall. Paulina blushed.

"My boy," Vlad said slowly, "do you know nothing of weddings? Ghost or otherwise?"

Phantom frowned suspiciously at the man. "I know some things—I watch movies, you know."

"Hmm," Vlad hummed. "That's to be expected from a teenage boy, I suppose. But have you ever watched a romantic movie? Or, as you kids call them, a chicky fli—"

"No." Phantom wrinkled his nose, disgusted by the very suggestion. "Never."

"Surely you must have watched one with a girlfriend—Oh, that's right!" Plasmius placed a hand over his forehead. "How forgetful of me! You've never had a girlfriend, and your 'friend' doesn't enjoy those types of movies. Perhaps you should try internet dating as well, Daniel."

Phantom blushed, made all the cuter by the pout he tried unsuccessfully to turn into a scowl. Paulina smirked and curled her fingers around her lips. Every boy she ever dated resisted watching chick flicks, but they could never say no to her. And once she had Danny Phantom in her arms, she'd make him as addicted to romantic movies as Dash.

Lester was on a mission—a mission of revenge that would redeem geeks and nerds worldwide. Fellow underdogs would whisper of this act for years to come at the card table, spreading his tale of heroism from geek to nerd until all knew his name. This mission required stealth, bravery, cunning, and—

"I have to go pee, Lester."

—and better sidekicks…Lester paused in his search and glared over his shoulder at his comrade. "I told you to go before we left, Mikey!" he whispered.

"Yeah, but," Mikey squirmed on his feet, his hands between his legs, "I didn't want to miss Danny Phantom…"

"We're missing him now," Lester pointed out.

Mikey pouted. "Yes, but it wasn't my idea to sneak off on some harebrained scheme. What if the jocks find us and—"

"They won't find us for the same reason you refused to use the bathroom when you had the chance." Lester opened the next door in the hallway, and peered inside the room. He didn't think Dash was into dinosaurs anymore, so he closed the door, and moved onto the next room.

Mikey waddled awkwardly after him, complaining under his breath. "I hope Dash has a bathroom attached to his room…"

Lester raised a walkie talkie to his lips, saying into the mike, "Alienfreak2, this is AlienFreak1. What's your status?"

"Single," Nathan's depressed voice sounded through the speaker. "Sadly, hopelessly, single. Oh, why won't you say yes, Valerie?"

Lester hit his forehead with the small communications device. His twin seriously needed to get over that girl. "That's not what I meant! What's Phantom's status?"

"I believe he's single too."

Mikey pulled the walkie talkie out of his hands before Lester could attempt to break it over his skull. "I have a girlfriend, Nathan," he said smugly.

"Oh yeah? Is she real this time, or an imaginary friend like the last one?"

Mikey's flushed face made his freckles stand out more noticeably. "T-Tiffany was real!"

"Tiffany? I thought her name was Rachel."

Mikey sputtered incoherently. Lester snatched the talkie from his slackened grip. "That's enough, you two," he said, glaring at the boy he could see. "None of us have a girlfriend—"

"I do too!"

"—but it's completely irrelevant—"

"Speak for yourself!"

"—because we are on a mission. Now tell me what has happened on the show, Nathan."

"Oh, um, the Box Ghost announced Danny Phantom as his Best Man."

Mikey stole the walkie talkie again before Lester could respond. "Really?" he exclaimed. "Why?"

"Phantom just asked the same thing…The Box Ghost seems to think they are friends because Phantom's been there for him in the past or something like that."

Lester rolled his eyes. He was just as curious about Danny Phantom as the next Amity Park civilian, but he could watch it on the internet later. Right now, he had a mission to accomplish. Lester nodded to himself, and then opened the next door. He grinned. There was a girly movie poster on the wall, and a pink teddy bear sat on the computer desk, but he'd bet his whole deck of playing cards this was Dash's room. It reeked of guy sweat.

"Guys!" he said. "I found it!"

"That can't be the only reason," Mikey said into the walkie talkie. "…Can it?"

Lester sighed. He seriously needed sidekicks who could stay focused. How did Fenton ever find his?

"He has other reasons it seems. He likes Phantom's taste for puns, admires his strength, and he wants the Ghost Boy's popularity—Cool!"

The excitement in Nathan's voice made Lester pause in the threshold. He looked back at Mikey. "What?" he asked.

"What?" Mikey repeated into the mike. "What is it?"

"Phantom just alluded to being unpopular in school!"

"Wow! You mean he was—Hey!"

Lester held the stolen walkie talkie close to his grinning face. "Was he a geek or a nerd? Why was he unpopular? Did he ever get bullied? Did he ever strike back against his bullies? How did he—"

"I said he alluded to being a loser. He didn't actually say it outright, and Thunder didn't question him about it."

Lester's shoulders drooped. "Oh…"

"But they might do an interview segment again. We can call in and ask him all about his high school experience then!"

Lester bit his lip. Although Nathan's idea sounded good, an interview segment would be the perfect time for the mission. With everyone distracted by the questions Phantom was answering, they wouldn't notice the noise coming from upstairs. Was it worth abandoning the mission just to find out if Phantom was once like them? Once so desperate for revenge and recognition, he'd risk social-life and limb just to prank his tormentors?

Lester nodded. Yes. It was worth sacrificing the mission…He sighed, and stared forlornly into Dash's room. "Alright, guys. We can continue this some other—oh!" He dashed into the room, berating himself for not thinking of it sooner.

Mikey gasped, and quickly ran in after him. "Lester! Lester, what is it?" His eyes landed on the bathroom attached to the bedroom, and he visibly straightened. "Yes! A bathroom!"

"Dash's computer!" Lester said. He dropped into the cushy computer chair, grinning from ear to ear. "This is perfect! We can watch the show and find incriminating information about Dash on this baby."

Mikey tore his eyes away from his refuge. "We can watch Phantom through the Amity News website!"

"Exactly," Lester said, already typing the website into the address bar. The Amity News homepage loaded a second later, and the first link on the page was to a live feed of the wedding taking place in the Ghost Zone. Mikey and Lester shared triumphant grins.

"The Box Ghost seems to think he is tormenting Phantom by choosing him as his best man," Nathan said.

"Noted, Alienfreak2," Lester replied. "We're going to watch the show on Dash's computer now, so don't worry about informing us of the proceedings anymore."

"What? How? …Oh! The internet! I want to watch it up there too! It's too crowded down here."

"Negative! You need to stay there and alert us to approaching hostile jocks."

"That's not fair, Lester!"

"It's plenty fair because I'm the one in charge. And it's Alienfreak1 over the com-link, stupid."

"I'm telling mom when we get home!"

"Then I'll tell her about the shrine you built to Valerie in your closet!"

"…You win this round..."

Lester smirked.

"Enough bickering!" Mikey shouted. He sat in the chair he'd dragged to Lester's side without the other kid's notice. "Click the link already!"

Lester raised one eyebrow. "I thought you needed to use the bathroom?"

"I can hold it."

Lester rolled his eyes. He settled back into the computer chair—wondering where Dash got the ultra-comfortable chair—and then clicked on the link.

Danny didn't know which was worse, being single at the ripe age of sixteen, or your lonely forty-plus old archenemy teasing you about the fact by throwing your suggestion of internet dating back in your face.

The boy stuttered and blushed, his brain straining to think up a witty retort. Unfortunately for him, even with all the failed love interests he's had in the past, he never once doubted his eligibility in the romance department. As a result, his arsenal of clever comebacks was woefully empty of anything he could use in this situation, and it must have shown on his face, because Vlad's smug smirk grew to unbearable proportions. Danny cursed his inability to wipe that condescending look off his enemy's face.

Danny huffed, and broke eye-contact with the man. "Do you have a point, Plasmius, or are you just exercising your fruitloop tendencies?"

Vlad's smirk slipped, if only slightly, but Danny mentally patted himself on the back for the small victory. "As a matter of fact, dear boy," Vlad said. "I do. Like always, you are naïvely unaware of the circumstances surrounding you. As the best man, there are certain duties you will be obligated to perform, the least of which is a speech you will have to give at the reception."

Danny's stomach knotted unpleasantly. "A-a speech?"

"Indeed." Vlad's smirk returned at full strength. "And not only will you have to stand before the entire ghost population, the speech must also consist of compliments and well-wishes for the newlywed couple. You will be expected to regale the audience with humorous exploits you and the groom have experienced together, and you will have to praise the groom and his bride—separately and as a couple."

Danny licked his dry lips, focusing on keeping his breathing steady. He could speak before the human population if necessary, but something about giving a speech in front of his enemies made his stomach rebel unpleasantly. It's just a small speech, he told himself. Nothing worth freaking out over. His stomach rumbled, as in in disagreement, because it wasn't just a speech. It was a speech of lies.

The boy shook his head forcefully. "Eh, whatever. I can handle some lame speech—"

"But that is not all that's expected of a best man, Daniel," Vlad cut in. "If the groom should get cold feet for whatever reason, it falls on you to boost his confidence once again. You must also regulate the proceedings of the wedding—ensure everything is running smoothly. One such duty that falls under this category is to keep the guests from fighting."

"Peacekeeper," Danny said. "I'm going to be the peacekeeper here?"

"Essentially. But you must also entertain the guests."

Danny's nose wrinkled. "Oh, well, that'll be fun…" How was he supposed to entertain a room full of ghosts without allowing them to fight?

"Finally starting to see the severity of the situation?" Vlad asked.

"Getting there, yes." Danny glanced at the Box Ghost, who was still giggling and muttering about how he was an evil mastermind. "Can't I just, you know, refuse?"

Vlad chuckled. "I'm afraid not, Daniel. The Box Ghost's decision is as binding as the Orbs of Attendance."

Danny jerked his gaze back to Vlad. "The Orbs are binding?"

"An Orb announces your arrival, but it also confines you to the room until all proceedings are completed. Didn't I mention it before?" Danny's eyes narrowed at Vlad's mock innocent tone. "How terribly forgetful I am today! Perhaps if you had allowed me to give you a thorough history lesson, I would have remembered to mention it..."

Danny growled in the back of his throat. The throne room was as large as his school's football field, but suddenly the space between the walls felt insufficient in containing him and his archenemy. And once the last few stragglers arrived, the room would be filled to the brim with ghosts who hated his existence. He knew coming to the dang party was a bad idea…

"…so I hope you brought your wedding gift along," Vlad was saying.

Danny blinked. "What? Gift? I didn't bring a gift!"

Vlad truly looked shocked this time. "Surely you must have known about the age-old tradition? Even you can't be that ignorant."

The young hero scowled. "For your information, I knew very well you're supposed to bring a gift to a wedding. I was just rushed in here so fast I didn't have a chance to grab one. It's not a big deal, is it?"

Vlad sighed. "If you were a regular guest, then no. But seeing as you are the best man, I can see complications arising."

"What kind of complications?"

"The unpleasant kind."

"That doesn't exactly tell me a whole lot, Vlad."

"I'm worried the details would frighten you, dear boy."

"Oh please. You couldn't scare me if you jumped out of my closet yelling, 'Boo!' …Uh, actually, that might do it, so my closet is off limits to you, old man."

"I assure you, Daniel, I have no desire to go anywhere near your closet."

"Good, because I have no qualms about setting Cujo on your cat."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"You want to bet?"

Frostbite cleared his throat, and Danny jumped, having forgotten the large ghost was still nearby. "You are not required to present a gift right away, Great One. Although if I may suggest, I believe a sculpture created from your own ice powers may be suitable."

Danny smiled. "Thanks, but I don't—"

"NO!" the voices of the Far Frozen ghosts rang out, and a few even fled the vicinity.

"Oh, come on!" Danny shouted, throwing his hands into the air. "I've gotten better at it!"

The furry ghosts flinched, staring at his upraised hands with wide eyes. Danny slowly lowered them, insulted, and yet secretly amused when their eyes followed the movement. He was tempted to allow his hands to glow blue, but he didn't think Frostbite would appreciate him frightening his people.

"Why are they afraid of you, Mr. Phantom?" Lance questioned.

Danny rubbed the back of his neck, chuckled. "Well, the Far Frozen taught me how to use my ice powers, and, uh, well…I didn't have the best aim during practice…"

"You can say that again," one the yetis murmured.

"But you have better control of your ice powers now, right?" Lance asked.


"What other powers do you poses?"


The Box Ghost shot toward Lance until only a few inches separated him from the human's camera. "WHO ARE YOU?" Lance jumped back, and his scream caught in his throat, producing a high-pitched hiccup. In a quieter, curious voice, the Box Ghost continued, "You appear familiar to me, do I know you?"

Lance's eyes shifted around nervously, his face pale. "Uh, I, uh…"

Danny floated in between the two. "Um, Mr. Thunder, this is—"


"Don't forget bubble wrap," Dani added.


Danny sighed. "Yeah…He's the groom. Box Ghost, this is Lance Thunder—the weather reporter from Amity Park News."

"Weather reporter?" Box Ghost asked. "I do not know any weather reporter! How is it that I recognize him from somewhere?"

"The News Station pretty much uses him as their go-to guy whenever they have breaking news regarding ghosts," Danny said. "They asked him to film your wedding. And, um, you probably saw him during your little incident with Pandora's 'Evil Box'…"

The Box Ghost squinted at Lance, humming softly to himself, and the human shifted uneasily on his feet. "You weren't the human who labeled me with the totally inaccurate and UN-terrifying name the Caterer Ghost, were you?"

"Uh…" Lance always thought of him as the Caterer Ghost, but he didn't need to know that. "No?"

The ghost floated a little closer, his stare growing more intense. "Did you tremble?"

What the…? "Yes?"

A large grin split the Box Ghost's face. "I MADE THE HUMAN TREMBLE!" His throat produced what sounded like a cross between a chuckle and a giggle. "I AM TERRIFYING!"

"It's not like that was a big accomplishment, Box Ghost," Danny said. "I mean, he's really easy to frighten." Lance threw the hero a betrayed look, to which Danny held up his hands in a show of innocence. "What? It's true…"

The Box Ghost gazed at Lance in increased interest. "He is?" he asked, an evil grin spreading his lips.

Although Lance had certainly seen more intimidating specters than the Box Ghost on this little trip, he still felt the need to shuffle behind Danny for protection. "I should have taken that job in Chicago…" Danny heard him whisper.

Danny allowed his eyes to drift over their surroundings, noting the ghosts watching their group, the ghosts ignoring their group, and the few ghosts staring at the camera in Lance's hand with way too much interest for Danny's comfort. The teen hero bit his lip. I wish you had too…

How am I going to escape this mess with my secret still intact?

What? Setting Danny up to fail? I would never!

...Okay, maybe a little :P

Not the best chapter (it was a pain in the butt - nerds were particularly annoying, as was the Box Ghost - and the description is deplorable XP) but I have finally finished the setup (give or take). Rejoice, folks! The fun begins next chapter ;)
-If there's a question you want Lance to ask Danny or any other ghost, now would be a good time to tell me.

Question: Should I change the summary for this fic? Dragon doesn't think so, but I want to know what you guys think. This is the summary I came up with so far:

Ghost Zone Experience: Lance Thunder is in for an experience of a lifetime when the undead drag him into their realm to film the holy matrimony of two ghosts. If only his boss cared less about the secrets surrounding Danny Phantom, and more about Lance's continued existence…

Please tell me what you think! I'm up for revising it.

Thanks for reading! Review, please, and I'll get back to you as soon as I can (or, at the very least, right before I post the next chapter).