Disclaimer: I don't own Bones or any parts thereof.

Spoiler Warning: Contains references to Season 5 Episode 22 The Beginning In The End

Chapter 38 Abandoned

Abandoned: to be: cast off; neglected; dumped; derelict; discarded; forsaken; empty; alone; deserted. She had looked up the word abandoned with just one sentence he had all but abandoned her. He had wanted to take a gamble on them to give them a try, but she couldn't take that chance. If she did and they failed he would have abandoned her and that have meant she would have been found to be cast off; neglected; dumped; derelict; discarded; forsaken; empty; alone; deserted. She couldn't take that chance, but later in the Diner and throughout the following week she saw the haunted look in his eyes. He was having trouble staying connected to her.

Now she looked up the word connected.Connected: to be: attached; joined; coupled; allied; associated; linked. How did those words stand up to the ones for abandoned? They were obviously different, the ones for abandoned were cold unforgiving. While those for connected were could be seen as positive, but they all had a common flaw, they all depended on one other person. They meant taking a chance.

What was taking a chance? Chance: a/an: prospect (hope); option (choice); likelihood (probability); possibility (opportunity). So taking a chance was a positive thing. She decided to write him a note, she was always able to express herself better in writing anyway.

Dear Booth; You asked me to take a chance on us and I told you I couldn't that I was afraid of failure and what that would mean for us, for me really. Since that time I have had time to think and observe your reaction to my decision and I think I own you a better answer.

I was afraid of us because if we failed, you would leave and I would lose you. You would abandoned me. What does the word abandoned mean to me, to be cast off; neglected; dumped; derelict; discarded; forsaken; empty; alone; deserted all words of hurt and finality.

As I watched you I saw you struggle with my decision. We seemed to be losing our connection to each other. So again I resorted to my dictionary, connected to be: joined; coupled; allied; associated; linked. All words that implied pairs, partners. The one thing I was afraid of loosing was you but here it was and I was losing you anyway because I was afraid to take a chance.

Once again I went to my favorite dictionary and looked up chance and found prospect (hope); option (choice); likelihood (probability); possibility (opportunity).

So where did this linguistic road lead me? I find an error in my thought process. If I wish to continue to live with this error I can continue to do as I have done for the last 5 years. However I find that living with error is unproductive and I no longer wish to do so. The error I have identified is in thinking that chance by definition is negative.

We have been partners, connected, for 5 years now and it has not been a negative relationship at all. So if you are still willing Booth I find the prospect, hope, option, choice, likelihood,. probability, possibility or opportunity of having a more fulfilling relationship with you most desirable.

If you are still interested please meet me at my apartment at 8 pm this evening so we can discuss the next phase of our relationship.

Bones

She sent the letter by courier the next morning at 9 am. By 9:30 he was in her office pulling her out of her chair and kissing her.

Pulling back and breathless she asked "Booth … what was … that for?"

He looked at her with a smile that lit her whole office "I couldn't wait until tonight, and I promise Baby I will never kiss you in your office without your permission again, but I couldn't wait for that either."

Her heart was beating so hard and suddenly 5 years had been a very long time, his kiss had pushed her over the edge. She grabbed his hand "Come on Booth we are going home" she said as she pulled him out her door toward his SUV.

"Who's home?" he chuckled.

"Mine" she said "it's 3 minutes closer."

It was a good thing it was Friday, it was even better it was the 4th of July week-end. They had three days to get to know each other and 5 years of fireworks to set off.

B&B&B&B&B&B&B&B&B&B&B&B

I hope you enjoyed this choice of Bones. I thought it might be interesting if she came to a different decision without all that traveling.

Nyre

Next: Dreams