Super Mario Sketch show Episode 8
Level 8-3 of Super Mario Brothers.
Mario is standing outside the castle on level 8-3, he's on the last level of rescuing the princess. He is in his small Mario form, he looks everywhere for a shroom over to find all the blocks have been punched.
Mario: Damnit! I can't take on Bowser without some protection!
Suddenly Toad appears out of nowhere.
Toad: Hey Mario! The princess is in this castle. Just wanna wish you the best luck on rescuing her.
Mario then looks at Toad strangely, noticing his head assembles a magic mushroom.
Toad (Gulping) : Er….Mario, why are you looking at me like that?
Toad: Yipe! (He runs off)
Mario: Come back here! (Starts to chase him)
Toad: Help! He's gone crazy! He's almost like one of the zombies in a George Romero film!
Mario then leaps on to Toad, like a tiger catching his prey and takes a small bite out of Toad's head, he grows to his Super Mario form. After taking a bite he leaves Toad alone.
Toad (lying injured): Somebody, please call a doctor.
Mario and Bowser face each other on the bridge over a lava pit in the last level.
Mario: Alright Bowser! Show me what you got!
Bowser breathes a fireball at Mario, Mario jumps up avoiding the fireball. When Mario lands, he then looks at Bowser's face, that looks like it's in pain.
Bowser: Owwwww! Ow! Ouch! I burnt my tongue! God damn! Doctor Smith has told me a thousand times! When I breathe fire! I have to aim it well away from my tongue and not breathe so much of it!
Bowser: Uggghhhh! You win! I need to make a doctor's appointment to get more of that cream.
Bowser then walks past Mario and then to a telephone.
Mario (smiling and says quietly to himself): Easy victory. (Mario then jumps to the next room.)
Bowser (on the phone): Hello, Doctor Smith? It's Bowser, again.
Mario enters the room only to find Link from the Legend of Zelda series there.
Link: O.K I've made a huge hole in the wall, you can escape now.
Mario: Hey! That's my girlfriend! And aren't you dating Zelda?
Link: Zelda's an irritating bitch queen! Peach for the win!
Mario: I came all this way, and I'm not leaving empty handed!
Link: Guess, we'll have to fight for it.
Mario: Oh Link, you know, I could never fight you. The way you handle that sword, you'd slice me in two in seconds..
Link: Glad you see it my way.
Mario: O.K You can have Peach. Let's shake hands in agreement.
Link: Alright, let's!
While Mario and Link shake hands, Link doesn't notice that Mario then rolls his other hand into a fist. Mario then swings his fist and punches Link in the face so hard he gets knocked out unconscious.
Mario: Ha! Ha! Sucka! You think I'm that much of a pussy? Do I look like Luigi? (turning to Peach) C'mon Peach let's go home.
Peach: Thank you Mario! The kingdom is safe.
Mario: Well only for the next five minutes till you get kidnapped again.
Peach: Very funny.