Narcissus Poeticus

Rating: T

Summary: Sam confesses her love to Freddie, will he accept or reject her? Sam/Freddie. One-Shot.


Freddie and Sam were lying back on the hill, on a perfect day, blue sky, clouds white and fluffy, grass green and sun beaming down. Freddie had picked up a flower from the ground next to him, and was casually stripping the petals away. They floated up and away in the cool breeze.

He was deep in thought, absentmindedly picking up another flower and tearing it as well. He opened his mouth to speak, but hesitated to gather his thoughts, "...I could try. If you want."

"Would you want Carly to just try?" Sam had dragged him up the hill when she saw that Carly wanted to have a little space with her new boyfriend. After a few minutes of small talk, she'd dropped her bombshell. Freddie had to ask Sam to repeat it, then to confirm it. To his credit, he hadn't run away or thought it was a joke, he just looked at her, then started trying to work out what it meant for him, and their friendship.

At the mention of Carly's name, he looked back down the hill, to see Carly and her current boyfriend, cavorting on a picnic blanket. The sight still felt wrong to Freddie, even after finally accepting and coming to terms with his rejection, he still harbored a minuscule feeling that it should be him. Laughing, playing, touching, and as he looked again, kissing his first, best friend. He dismissed the thought as pure fantasy, that wasn't going to happen, and he couldn't keep dreaming of it.

He didn't ask that of Carly, and Sam wouldn't ask that of him. Maybe that wasn't the problem. Sam couldn't ask it of him, he'd never asked it of Carly, but maybe he could do what Carly couldn't.

"I'm not Carly though."

"Cut the crap Benson. The last thing I need is for a pity relationship. If you can't have Carly, then I can't have you." Sam had come clean, the culmination of months of self-torment and desire hidden by anger directed towards the boy with the brown hair. The decision to tell him came after he was so clearly broken by Carly's final refusal.

Carly spoke the words as a whisper, but their tone and meaning were significant and fatal. Sam had watched, as he broke into a weak smile and thanked Carly for listening, his voice cracking when he made an excuse to leave.

Freddie had shuffled out, his hands shaking beside himself and it was over. For the next few weeks, he toiled against his own pain. Whenever Freddie sat he crumpled into the seat, slumped and distant. Sam made the decision to tell him once he recovered. It appeared to be like ripping off a band-aid, the quicker she got it over with, the less pain she would end up with when it did end up hurting her.

Eventually he started returning to normal. Freddie stopped walking like he was dragging the weight of his shadow behind him. He stopped drawing in long breaths, then sighing. Lack of sleep no longer drew his face down, and most importantly, he wasn't spending every non-productive hour putting reality out of his mind on the fire escape.

Which brought them out here, on this bright, sunny day. Sam couldn't put it off any longer, his gaze had started to wander beyond Carly, and soon he'd find another, Sam wouldn't come between him and his potential future girlfriend.

"I always thought Carly might end up liking me. Why can't I be the same?" He was still young, but he knew that not everything had to be love at first sight.

"Just drop it." Not everyone fell in love at the same time. Sam had fallen in love with him rather suddenly, after years of bickering, arguments, and the occasional caring moment, those feelings dropped on her like a bag of cement. He'd fallen in love at first sight with Carly, but she'd never seen him as more than a friend. Life was never straight-forward, and love of all things was an indicator of that.

"Just drop it? I'm not going to just drop it. You told me you loved me. How can I just drop that? Jesus, I know how Carly felt now. This is serious Puckett!" To Freddie, it felt like he was taking on the weight of her love on his own, because he hadn't returned it, that it was his burden to hold.

"I ain't had the privilege of being someone's unrequited love doofus." Freddie put his head back for a moment, pondering his response. His face scrunched up whilst he thought, until the proverbial light-bulb went off in his head.

"Ya know what Sam? Fuck it. I'm not Carly. Maybe she could just sit there, unable to risk ruining our friendship, until I finally gave up like a coward, but no, I'm not letting the same thing happen to you."

"I can't-" Freddie rolled over on the grass so he was half on top of her. He quickly pushed his hand under her long hair, to the back of her neck, pulling Sam forward so he could crush their lips together before he lost his nerve.

"What the fuck?!" Sam pushed him off her, and he rolled back to his original position, except now he had a look of determination on his face.

"I'm not going to watch you turn into me. Moping around, feeling sorry for myself. I've lived that life already. You don't deserve that. It's bullshit." Freddie decided he wasn't going to carry that burden, he'd gone through one side of that with Carly, and no way in hell was he going to let himself get trapped into the reverse.

"But you don't love me?" Freddie wrapped his hand around the hand that hung limply by Sam's side, and intertwined their fingers together.

Freddie just rolled his eyes, "Why do I have to love you right now? I've spent how many years pining over Carly, proclaiming my love? I'd like to try falling in love like a normal person. If that's all right with you?"

"But we fight all the time?"

"You still fell in love with me. So that clearly doesn't matter."

"What if I hurt you?"

"Stop making excuses Samantha. I'm not going to give up the first time you hurt me." Freddie was a young man, who'd been through enough pain in his life to not let the first little problem screw him over.

"Don't call me Samantha."

"I'm calling you Samantha. No-one else is allowed to call you that. If you're in love with me, you'll let me, and I'm going to."

"Should I call you Fredward?"

"Call me what you like babe. Dork. Doof. Loser. Nub. Freddie. Fredwina. I don't care." All that mattered to Freddie was the sentiment behind those epithets, "You love me, that's what counts."

"Babe?" A cloud drifted by that looked like a ham, the 27th such looking cloud that day in Sam's estimation.

"Just go with it." Freddie was far from averse to her natural beauty, her long hair, glittering eyes, the way she smiled when she was excited, Freddie couldn't deny his attraction to her. But that wasn't all that counted. Freddie could rely on her, trust her, they understood each other, and were there for each other when they needed it most.

"What about Carly?" Sam didn't want to enter anything whilst thoughts of Carly lingered inside him.

Freddie struggled upright, on his knees so he could balance against the slope of the hill, and pulled Sam up in front of him.

He pushed both her hands together, and placed his own on top and below, "Sam, I promise you, right here, now, I will never, ever think about Carly like that. I don't care if she begs and pleads. Even if she appears naked in my bedroom, throws herself on me and tells me to make love to her right there. I won't do it. You come first."

"You won't leave me... my mother, she.. it ruined her, if you left me for Carly, I don't know what I'd do." Sam had seen first hand the problems that Carly, even though Sam loved her, could bring into her relationships. Jealously, desire to take what wasn't hers, it had caused problems in the past.

"Sam. I will never betray you like that. I'm not going to turn out like my father, I'd rather die." Freddie was looking deep into her eyes, and she could see beauty and sincerity in them like nothing she'd seen before. When Sam watched those eyes before, they were almost always looking at someone else. The few times they locked together, Sam would yell, asking what he was staring at. Freddie would quickly avert his gaze, dropping it to the floor.

"Not even if she was dripping with whipped cream and chocolate and wanted you to lick it off?" Sam chuckled, trying to lighten the mood.

"If Carly did that, I'd go get you. It would be far more enjoyable to watch, you know how the Benson family feels about being wet and sticky." Sam playfully punched him on the arm.

Freddie lifted the arm Sam punched, slid it along her arm, up past her shoulder, and cupped her cheek in his hand. The first kiss was quick, spontaneous and over before it started, this had a build-up, and Sam felt her heart pounding, her stomach churning with nerves, as he leaned into her. Sam closed her eyes, and let Freddie guide her movements with the hand on her cheek. Their lips connected sweetly together, before she took control.

Sam grabbed around his waist, whilst still connected to Freddie, twisted him onto the ground beneath her. She poked her tongue through, and he played with her, touching, feeling, letting her roam as she wished. They tore apart minutes later, desperately sucking in air. Freddie reached across the grass and picked a daffodil, which he tucked behind her ear.

"What's that for?"

"It matches you. It's beautiful." Sam blushed and muttered a thank you. "I brought something for you." Freddie reached into the pocket of the jacket that was sitting in the grass next to them, and pulled out a sandwich, he took half, and gave Sam the other. They ate in silence, before they decided to walk back down the hill to where Carly sat alone hand over her eyes shielding them from the sun, looking up at Sam and Freddie.

"So.. I saw a little commotion going on up there. You two having fun?" Carly questioned. Freddie opened his mouth, before looking over to Sam to make sure it was okay. She nodded yes, and Freddie continued.

"We kissed.. and we're together now." At that news, Carly bounced up, and clapped her hands.

"Tell me all about it. Gimme the deets please."

"Boring!" Sam rolled her eyes, jumped up and dashed off to join Carly's boyfriend, who had found a group of other guys to play football with. Freddie laughed when Sam tackled the guy holding the ball and stole it off him.

Carly raised an eyebrow, "So Freddie, how was the kiss?" They were starting to pack up from the picnic, ready to leave the park.

Freddie looked down at his feet. "Um, Sam tasted like coleslaw."

"You know what I mean Freddie, no delays. I must know!" Carly reached over and poked Freddie with both hands, causing him to jump back and burst into laughter as she continued her assault. He cried out for mercy, and Carly stopped, allowing time to compose himself.

"Well, the first one was quick, but the second one... it felt like I was falling in love again. Sam loves me, I felt it when I was kissing her and I could see it in her eyes." Freddie noted the reaction, eyes wide, mouth agape.

"I know it might be hard to believe, so soon after well.. you, but I have to move on. I don't know if we will work out, or what's going to happen, but I couldn't let her end up like I did."

"Oh." Carly's index finger rolled around the edge of a plastic cup.

"It's not your fault, I want to take that risk, roll the dice, and see what happens. We could end up hating each other for real, but she loves me and I can't deny her."

Carly scrunched her face, thinking before she spoke, "I hated making you feel like that." When they were younger, it was almost cute, knowing that Freddie had a crush on her, but the longer it went on, the more Carly felt like she had wrapped him up in chains. Carly felt no spark all those years ago. They were friends, and that was the end of the matter in her eyes. Any subsequent feelings were simply platonic friendship mixed with sympathy for Freddie, and were pushed down as a matter of course.

"Did you know how Sam felt?" Freddie asked as he packed a set of cups together.

"Yeah, she told me after we had that talk. She didn't want to say anything whilst we still had that.. thing hanging over our heads." Carly had broken the chains, and doused the fire that burnt inside.

"Do you think you'll work out?"

"Yeah Carly, our parents screwed up enough for two generations, I don't want to hurt Sam like that."

"I know you probably didn't think about Sam like that before, you aren't finding feelings that aren't really there?"

Freddie was steadfast. "This is real. I'm going for it, it's worth the risk. We've been friends nearly as long as I've been friends with you, but I'd always told myself I would take that risk, and I'm not backing down. I'm not going to lose her Carly, you'll help me right?"

"I will Freddie. You know how important you both are to me, I don't want either of you to be unhappy. If you ever need to talk, I'll be there. That will go for Sam as well."

"Speak of the devil," Carly laughed, as Sam came rushing back over towards them.

"They kicked me out for hitting too hard. They were only playing touch apparently." Freddie laughed at her exuberance.

"Sam, do you want to go now? Are you okay here Carly?" Freddie eased himself upright.

"Yeah, I'm fine Freddie, go have some fun." It felt nice, to see Freddie happy again, and she knew he'd treat Sam right. Freddie would be a calming influence on Sam's madcap behavior, and she would loosen him up. They made their goodbyes, and walked hand in hand over to Freddie's car.

"I'm driving! You suck Benson!" Sam grabbed the keys out of his hand when he took them out, and raced to get to the driver side first.

Freddie strode over, pulled Sam to him, drawing her into a long and passionate kiss. "I'm never going to get tired of doing that." Freddie didn't want to get ahead of himself, but it was conceivable he'd found the only woman he'd ever kiss like that in his entire life.

Sam jumped into the driver's seat. "I sure hope not, mama doesn't like things getting boring."

Before she started the car, Freddie bashfully turned to her, "Samantha, would you like to go out for dinner tonight?"

"It better be some place fancy and expensive and none of that small portion crap!"

"Of course Samantha." Freddie leaned over, and kissed Sam on her forehead.

Carly watched them drift away from her. Once they reached the car, they started kissing. Sam was hard up against the door, their faces constantly shifting and moving, looking for the best angle for their lips to touch each other. After a few minutes of that back and forth, Freddie disconnected, their tongues visible as they drew apart yet straining to remain together. Freddie paused, before moving down and placing a barrage of kisses on her neck. It was breathtaking, even from her long distance vantage point she could see Sam moaning with pleasure, her face flushing crimson.

The hotness of their french kiss wasn't nearly as shocking to Carly as what followed. Freddie pulled Sam tight against him, and she leaned down into the crook of his neck. They held their hug, with Freddie stroking Sam from her hair down to the small of her back, whispering sweet nothings in her ear. He placed a light kiss on Sam's lips, then let go. As he walked to the other side of the car, their hands outstretched, wanting to hold on to each other as long as possible, until finally their fingertips split apart.

As they drove away, Carly looked back towards her boyfriend who appeared to be in a fight, rolling around on the grass with one of the other players on his team. She examined the ground, picking up the flower that had fallen off when Sam zoomed away to play football. As she picked off every 2nd petal, the girl couldn't help but wonder if she'd made the right decision.

The yellow flower fell, tumbling gracefully in the wind, before it landed in the dirt next to her.

Carly sighed, then went back to cleaning. Every so often she would pause. Carly would look up, and her gaze would linger at the parking spot where Freddie and Sam had left together.

End.



AN: Seddie zomgwtfbbq? I had some writers block on my "Moonlight" story, and I wrote this instead. I hope you guys like it, please R&R.

As for my Moonlight story, I'll be getting it done in the next day or two I promise, and the next update will be much faster.