Hello again! So, welcome to my first (and perhaps last) 'fluff' RussiaxAmerica fic. I don't know where the idea came from but... Hm. I can't quite take it seriously but it's very fun to write. The rating is M but it will just be 16+ for the most part. It won't deserve its M rating until waaay down the line. This will in no way interfere with my update schedule for God Save America!

Disclaimer: I do not own Axis Powers Hetalia or Big Macs now or ever.

EDIT: So, I am going to be editing and resubmitting the chapters. All of the content will be the same. I am simply fixing the constant change in tense which I have come to realize I was horrific at and I am very embarrassed about it. I will also fix minor errors in grammar etc. and am changing Russia's dialogue more to how I write it now (i.e. his saying 'Do not' instead of 'Don't') I might try for a chapter a day but we'll see about that. That's all!

America stares at the other countries mingling with one another. Watching and observing the others isn't usually something he does but he is particularly bored. One can always see the dynamics of the world at a glance just by coming to these World Conference meetings. Who is getting along, who throws death glares across the room, who is hiding bandages under their suits, or display suspicious behavior, afraid they might be confronted for something they shouldn't be up to. Country watching. It relieves America's boredom anyway. He takes another bite of his Big Mac and washes it down with a gulp of cola. There is almost thirty minutes before it even begins. At least he doesn't have to talk at the beginning this year. He is exhausted from everything on his plate lately. And he has a distinct feeling that no one will like his new plan for renewable energy. He thinks it is badass and way cool but no one ever likes his ideas. Their thinking is just too boring. His musing is interrupted by a shadow falling over him. His eyes slowly travel up an off-white coat, a scarf, a deceitfully childish smile, a large nose, finally meeting violet eyes.

It is the ever-precarious Russia. "Hello America. May I speak to you in private before the conference gets started?"

America takes a long sip of his soda, contemplating the request. On one hand he can't begin to imagine what Russia has to say to him that isn't a threat of some kind. After all, they haven't been on very good terms for a while, even now their relationship strained. On the other it will give him something to do. He looks over and sees that England is still looking over his papers. He is the first to talk and has threatened America with death if he bothers him. Japan seems occupied, however reluctantly, with China and Korea. As for Canada, he can't find him. Never can. He swears the guy is invisible. The straw makes a grating sucking noise as America finishes off the soda.

"...Alright then."

Russia beams silently and America stands, tossing his cup in a garbage can and taking another bite of his burger.

Russia leads him out of the room and into the hush of a side hall. He looks around, checking for people. When he confirms that they are alone he turns to America, who is a touch curious despite himself.

"Well, what did you want to say?"

Russia tilts his head slightly and, clasping his hands behind his back, leans down until his face is hovering right in front of America's. "You and I are going to fall in love."

America chokes on the last of his burger, swallowing hard. He coughs violently, wishing he had some soda left to help wash down the burger. When he can finally breathe there is only one word that seems appropriate for the situation. "Wh-what?!"

Russia continues to smile. "You are going to fall in love with me."

America stares at him in horror. Is this supposed to be some kind of joke? Some very poorly constructed joke? Well he doesn't think it is very funny. "...You say the weirdest things Russia. If you just brought me out here to fuck with me I'm not interested." He moves to walk away when Russia's hand slams against the wall in front of him. America slowly turns back to face Russia who suddenly seems even more menacing than usual.

"I am being serious America. It is my intent that we become lovers."

America flushes, staring at Russia as if he's some alien creature. Hell, even aliens are more welcome than this. "...This joke is going a bit far."

Russia sighs and grabs America's chin, tilting his face up. "It is not a joke. I do not do jokes."

America can believe that. Still, there is no way Russia is standing in front of him seriously telling him that the two of them should, no, will become lovers. It is impossible, implausible, other words that started with 'im'. There is no way! It is-

Russia leans in and kisses him lightly on the lips. Eyes going wide, America rears back, hitting his head hard against the wall. "Shit!"

He reaches back and rubs the aching spot on the back of his skull as Russia laughs. "Careful America, you do not want to hurt yourself."

America wipes his mouth. "What did you do that for?! You're seriously freaking me out Russia!"

Russia taps his nose playfully. "I am sorry. That was not my intent at all. I am just trying to be very frank with you as I know you are kind of an idiot and do not understand subtlety."

America prickles angrily. "Excuse me? I am not an idiot! My brain just works in ways that most of you couldn't hope to comprehend!"

Russia chuckles. "You're amusing too. It is one of the reasons I finally decided to pick you."

America squeezes closer to the wall, wondering what his chances of ducking past the clearly mentally unstable Russia to freedom are. As if reading his mind, or more likely his movements, Russia presses in closer, blocking the other side of America as well. "Well America? Will you become my lover? Here's a hint: This isn't actually a yes or no question."

America, despite being completely pinned to the wall by Russia's presence at this point, has no intention of being intimidated into a relationship. "Hell no!"

Much to America's despair the smile doesn't even budge. "See, you are stupid America. Perhaps I just should have told you to say 'yes.' I don't know if you realize this but you are really hurting my feelings."

America doubts he actually has feelings to hurt. "Perhaps you didn't hear me. Hell no!"

Russia suddenly grabs America, crushing him in a bear hug. His mouth hovers over America's ear. "I do not think you have quite gotten it through your thick skull. One way or the other we are going to be lovers. This can be settled quietly now, which would really be in both of our best interests. But I can play this the hard way. What shall it be?"

America struggles in his grip. "Let go of me! There's no way I would ever be your lover!"

Russia nuzzles his neck, leaving a single kiss before releasing him. "Very well. Just remember you are the one who chose this."

America puts a hand to his neck and takes rapid steps backwards, expecting the Russian to attack him again. Russia, however, simply smiles as he watches him get further and further away. America finally turns and sprints down the rest of the hallway. He bursts into the main room, panting. A few of the others turn to look but on seeing it is just America, roll their eyes and look away again. America glances around desperately for someone to talk to about what has just happened. England is nowhere in sight, Japan is still surrounded, where is Canada damn it? Hell, at this point he might settle for France.

Switzerland's voice cuts through the general chatter of the room. "Everyone start filing in! We want to get started on time!"

America watches stupidly as the other countries begin to file into the conference room. Their faces seem to be a bit of a blur to him. Why can't he find anyone he's close to? A hand clamps down on his shoulder, making him jump.

Russia leans down. "Better get in there America. You would not want to hold everyone up would you?"

America hastily pulls away from Russia. "Don't touch me!"

Russia walks past America without another word. America watches him then rubs the back of his head again, which still stings. How can he act so casually? Is it really just some weird joke? Is it to freak him out? Well it isn't going to work. America takes a deep breath to calm himself.

Switzerland yells over at him. "Hey! Get moving idiot! No one wants to wait for you!"

America grumbles and makes his way into the room. He takes a seat between Sweden and Greece, relieved that Russia isn't anywhere near him or even in his line of sight. England stands at the front of the room in front of a power point. America can already feel his eyelids growing heavy. It is hard enough to concentrate when he is the one talking let alone boring old England. As if to prove this point, England launches into one of the most boring presentations America has ever had to listen to. It's not long before he's nodding off.

At one point England throws a pen at America, hitting him squarely on the forehead, yelling at him to pay attention. America is able to stay awake for ten minutes before his eyes start to droop again. Time seems to crawl. The words are enough to bring him out of a light doze when England finally announces the long awaited lunch break. He tries to cover his yawn as he blinks his way into wakefulness.

Some of the other countries have begun to stand when Russia's voice rings out across the room. "Excuse me, I hate to interrupt but before we go on break I would like to make an important announcement. America and I are lovers."

This comment jolts America into a state of complete wakefulness and his face flushes bright red. There is a pause of total silence and then the room erupts.

"What, the two of them are lovers? That's a joke isn't it?"

"I always thought there was something going on between those two."

"Surely that can't be right?"

"Did you see America blush? I bet it was supposed to be a secret."

America stands and points an accusing finger at Russia. "That's a lie! That's a filthy lie! You communist liar bastard! Don't believe his filth!"

But the whispers aren't stopping. Everywhere America looks there are doubtful or amused looks. Surely they believe him don't they? America looks to England who stares at him, mouth agape. Surely he doesn't believe Russia.

America grinds his teeth. "Errr it's a lie I say! Damn it!"

He violently pushes past Greece and flees the room, humiliated beyond reason. Meanwhile Russia simply smiles on. His words have created the perfect effect. Even if America doesn't consider himself Russia's lover quite yet, as far as the rest of the world is concerned he is and that is a step in the right direction.

AN: So...With World Conferences I wasn't sure if the U.S. usually speaks/hosts but... whatever. I really am not sure how they work and didn't feel like researching them that in-depth. Sorry for inaccuracies.