Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, it all belongs to Stephenie Meyer. ^-^
Hello everyone this is my second fic, I wanted to try something different and I thought I would try a Bellice fic, I love them so much so I wanted to write one of my own, so I hope you enjoy this.
P.S: for people who are reading my other fic 'Feelings Heard' I haven't given up on it I'm just at a writers block so I thought I would write this. So dunny fret I will continue as soon as I have inspiration.
'All I wanted was you'
Chapter 1: Painful Memories
It's been months since I set my eyes on their perfect pale skin, Months, since I looked into their honey topaz coloured eyes, that I loved so much. I have tried so hard to erase their perfect features from my mind but with no success, how in the world was I supposed to just forget that I had known and been friends with Vampires, that is something you can't just erase from your mind with a click of you finger.
The months have been agonisingly slow. When Edward left me there, in that forest, and muttered those painful words, I felt my heart crack, but the biggest blow that shattered my already fragile heart was that she was leaving me...Alice was leaving me.
My best friend was leaving me. I don't know why but I was more devastated knowing that I was going to lose her. She was my friend, the one I went to, to chat about things that Edward wouldn't understand. The one I snuggled on the couch with whilst watching movies till the early hours of the morning, the one who was my rock, the rock that disappeared. Of course I was upset about losing Edward... I mean I loved him, didn't I?, but losing Alice meant so much more to me.I just couldn't understand it.
When they left, all I could think about was him...Edward, the first love I ever had. I thought about how he took away my family, my immortal, important, and irreplaceable family. I missed all of them, Esme, Carlisle, Jasper, Emmett, even Rosalie. I missed Edwards cold arms wrap around me whilst he lulled me to sleep with his melodic voice, telling me how much he loved me.
I missed my and Alice's conversations about school, and the past, I even missed her telling me about clothes and her trying to force me to go on shopping trips with her. Everything was perfect...simple.
But on the day of my 18th birthday, at the party that Alice had arranged for me, my world came crashing down all around me. When Alice handed me that one present with that enchanting smile on her face, I had no idea how my life would change so drastically, just by taking off the wrapping paper.
It was silly really, that all this mess was because of a stupid paper cut, 'Stupid fragile skin' I mentally scolded myself when I remembered that. And all I could remember was Alice's face, the shock on her face as she saw me sitting there with my wound on my arm, and then watching as Edward held back Jasper from attacking me, I felt terrible, I put Jasper through that pain, and Alice was worried about Jasper and me at the same time it must have been a lot for her to deal with, and for that I mentally scolded myself.
But I stopped scolding myself when I thought about what happened the next day, Edward taking me for a walk into the forest. The pain on his face when he told me he was leaving me. The hurt in his eyes as he kissed my forehead. My heart ripped at the seams. I actually believed him when he said he didn't love me, because if he did love me he wouldn't have left me here, lonely.
But when he told me, I didn't brake down like I thought I would, I actually felt relieved for some unknown reason, I thought everything would be fine, I had my Alice, my shield against the pain, the hurt, the depression, but I didn't have my shield against the pain, because he took her away from me, when realisation hit me in the face saying, 'She's gone' that was when I broke down, I became a zombie, I didn't want to eat I didn't want to sleep, not that I had a choice every time I closed my eyes all I saw was him walking away from me, but what stopped me from shutting my eyes was not Edward but it was Alice, her face, her angelic face smiling at me.
I still loved Edward even though he took my angel away, I still loved him but I also loved Alice, like you would any best friend, but the love I felt for Alice was more than what I felt for Edward, I thought maybe it was because she was like the sister I never had, and then they left me. Edward said it was for my own good 'apparently' but I didn't see how leaving me like this is for my own good.
After a while my depression lifted abit, I still had Jacob, my diary, I could talk to him about anything, the lonely months started to get filled with me going to La Push, I felt happier spending time with Jacob it was like having a brother who I could confide in. But whilst hanging around with Jake, I was doing extreme things to occupy my time, like riding motor bikes and going for runs in the forest, I found out something amazing, I found that when I was doing these extreme things I could hear Edwards melodic voice warning me off from doing these things, so I kept on doing them just for a chance to hear his voice.
After a while I ran out of extreme things I could do, that's why I was thinking about all the things that has happened in the most depressing time in my life sitting on my bed looking at the ceiling. And then it hit me , I remembered Jake showing me some people from the reservation jumping off a cliff into the water and he said he would show me how to do it, I needed to hear Edwards voice in my ears so badly, so I headed down to La Push, I asked billy where Jake was and he said he wasn't home and that he didn't know when he would be back, I decided then I would just go by myself, what's the worst that could happen it was only jumping into water, I was a good swimmer, I would be fine. So I headed over to the cliff, I got out of my truck and headed over to the edge, I didn't care about clothes I had some spare in the truck anyway. I readied myself, and waited, I almost jumped off the cliff when I heard it..
'Don't do it Bella' I heard in an angry voice, but it faded, and it would come back, so I took a deep breath and jumped, I heard the smash of my body on the surface of the water and then all I saw was a black abyss, I must have been under the water, it was so hard to move the water was ice cold, then I heard his voice again, 'Swim Bella! Swim to the surface!' I was in heaven hearing his voice but then it went black, I don't really remember much after that, all I remember is that Jake saved me, he pulled me out of the water,
"Bella what were you thinking? You could have died" I didn't really pay attention I was too disorientated from nearly drowning.
After that he took me to his place where I stayed for a few hours, then he took me home, after I had to tell him about 20 times that I was fine and I was just tired, and I would phone him later.
I walked into my house, and sighed as I closed the door behind me, and I walked into the living room where I saw something that I didn't really think I would see for the rest of my life,
"Alice?" I couldn't move, I said it as merely a whisper, but I knew she would hear, she stood there staring at me with the same look of shock on her face but something else was there that I couldn't quite place it. Then a look of concern and relief washed over her face,
"Oh my god, Bella, Your okay... I thought...I thought you were" she didn't finish her sentence, before I knew it she was in front of me, she pulled her arms around me, and hugged me tighter than she normally did, I couldn't take this, it was too much for one day.
"let me go, Now!" I shouted the last word out, trying not to shout all of the rest out. She retracted her arms from me and stood back.
"Bella, I'm so sorry, I didn't me to...I had a vision and I had to come right away, how did you survive, I mean I saw you...drown" she whispered the last part out, I didn't know what to say to her, all I wanted to do was hug her like she hugged me but I couldn't, she left me here to rot and I wanted to show her what it did to me.
"Jake saved me he pulled me out of the water, I don't really remember much I blacked out for most of it" I replied saying all of it through gritted teeth. I could tell she was scared and concerned for me but I was so upset and tired, it just hit me all at once.
"Oh I'm so glad you are okay Bella, I'm so sorry I left, I have been such a freakin idiot" she said as she tried to give me another hug crying the tears that would never come, I stepped back, I couldn't fall for it I needed to be strong.
"Alice...I need you to leave, please, I'm angry,upset and tired and I don't want you to be around me at the moment" I said looking away, not wanting to look into her honey eyes and regret what I had just asked. She stood still for a moment and then relaxed a bit more.
"Alright I understand, I will come back later when you have calmed down" I saw her turn around and walk towards the front door, I wanted so much to run to her and grab her hand and say 'forget what I said' and then cry endlessly into her shoulder.
But I didn't I just stood there and watched her go, watched her walk out of my front door, get into her car and drive away, and it suddenly occurred to me...'I'm the freakin idiot'. I couldn't stay mad at Alice she was still my best friend and she came back to see that I was ok, and I just brushed her off like and unwanted door to door salesman, I need to speak to her but where would she be?
There is only one place where she could go. One place that she could retreat to. So I grabbed my coat and keys and headed out the door and headed to the one place Alice could have gone to …
The Cullen Manor.
A/N: Wow you don't realise how hard it is to write a Bellice fic until you actually try and write
one for yourself haha. Well I hoped you liked it, go easy on me since this is my first Bellice fic. I will post the second chapter up as soon as it's finished, so there won't be that long of a wait,
well thanks for reading, and please click on the green box and review it would mean a lot to me if you did I would love to hear your thoughts (not in a creepy Edward sort of way though) haha.
Much love to ya...xxxx