Title: Deserving
Tattooed On My Mind
Princess Nine
Onesided Hiroki/Izumi; Hiroki/Ryo
Warnings: Second person, Different perspectives on certain characters
Summary: You go on about how she doesn't deserve him. But who are you kidding? You don't deserve him either.

Disclaimer: Don't waste your time with lawsuits. I don't own Princess Nine.

A/N: I know, I have other, more important things to write for P9, but I haven't written anything in a while, and I was mad at myself and my relationship with my boyfriend for a while so I decided to take it out on a fanfic. and on buying a $57 pair of shoes.

Before I get raids of complaints, I know some people are gonna piss and moan about how different Ryo is in this story than how she is in the anime. Yes, Ryo is by far my least favorite character, but I'm portraying her the way I did because it's from Izumi's side. Izumi's mind is stating what Izumi is thinking. Despite that hug at the end, I seriously doubt Izumi has any high feelings for Ryo. I'm sure Izumi will be seeing Ryo as a rather manipulative person, as she probably still thinks she deserves Hiroki more (which she kindof does).

I'm planning on writing at least two more of these Hiroki/Izumi-esque fics. I like exploring their relationship the most of all the canon ships. But hopefully, I will write more stuff for my multi-chaptered things.

I should've been writing a paper instead of doing this. Nevertheless, enjoy!

You roll your eyes at them as they walk by, his hand on her waist, her head on his shoulders. You want to think you're not jealous, but even you can't fool yourself. They're together now, legitimately and permanently together now. All you can do is watch them hold each other, kiss each other, love each other. And yet, you still can't let go.

No matter how hard you try, you can't let him go.

If Ryo were to know if this, she'd think you were pathetic. She'd say, "Grow up, Izumi. You gave him up. You'll have to suffer the consequences." She'd then giggle before capturing his lips in a revolting kiss, knowing well that all you can do is glare at her with your fists balled at your sides. Maybe you'll gag or vomit when you get to the nearest bathroom, but that's neither here nor there.

The bottom line is you can't do anything. While you're unable to move or act, you're only thinking of how she doesn't deserve him.


You can't go anywhere without hearing his hearty laughter being overpowered by her nauseating giggling. As you practice your batting swings, she's sitting on his lap in the sidelines, talking about nothing of interest to you, him, or anyone. Or so you assume, as you can tell Hiroki's laughs aren't as genuine as they usually are, and no one else is laughing.

He keeps staring at her, however, which makes you confused. You've always been confused on why he finds her so remotely interesting, let alone breathtaking. You wonder, maybe it's her bad mascara job that's attracting him to her eyes all of a sudden? Since when did clumps in eyelashes make one's eyes look bigger than the moon?

It doesn't help that her position on his lap is ridiculous. Even you know Ryo Hayakawa isn't the grossly romantic type, and wouldn't normally have one leg wrapped around Hiroki's while the other is crossed over it, nearly pointed in the air. He's obviously interested in this uncharacteristic act, but it's a fake pose nonetheless. In the end, you know he's head over heels with a fake girl.

You shake it off, turning your head away from them. You pretend the ball coming toward you is her head and smack it far past the fences. It's your way of saying she doesn't deserve him.


It's your birthday, and you're waiting for him to show up at your house for a special celebration. He promised you months ago he'd take you somewhere exciting. He didn't have to, but he stuck to that promise. It's the best he could do since you only had a small picnic on a hill for his birthday.

Your issue with this is waiting for him. It's taking him forever to get to your house, and it's not like he lives too far away from you. He promised he'd get there as early as he could. What could be taking him so long?

You decide to wait for him by thinking of the good times the two of you had together. He was always like a brother to you, always protected you and stayed by your side. He would always help you when you needed it, hold you when you needed his comfort. It amazes you how long ago the good times seem now. You almost want them back. You definitely want them back.

What you want more than that is more. You don't want him to hold you like a sister anymore. You want him to hold you like he holds that other girl. You want him to be by your side nearly every waking moment of your life, caressing you, kissing you, loving you. After that whole incident before that life-changing game, you still want that.

You've been lost in thought when you realize it has become night time. You're still in your pale pink dress, your hair still in two big bows. You look at the time – 7:00 PM. Hiroki hasn't shown up yet. You sulk in your chair. He isn't showing up.

That disgusting giggle is ringing outside of your window. You look out to see them walking, hand in hand, toward your house. They stop right below your window, when Hiroki is halted from walking to your door. Ryo throws her arms around his neck, and you almost see him push her away for a split second, but it's too late. They're locked in a sickening, repulsively romantic kiss. Disgusted, you run to the bathroom to escape anymore noises coming from the pair.

Some birthday this turned out to be.

The next morning, there's a box on your doorstep. Inside the box are an expensive looking pearl necklace and two tickets to Tokyo Disney Land. On top of the box is a note from Hiroki that reads:

Happy Birthday, Izumi! I wanted to come over, I really did. Tofu and I had a date I completely forgot about, and I couldn't get out of it. I'm really sorry. I hope these make up for yesterday.


You clutch the box and note to your chest, sobs starting to rack through you. You know for sure he deserves better than that girl. You know just as well that Ryo just doesn't deserve him.


You find yourself on the phone with him, and you're involved in an intelligent conversation. It feels good to speak to him on a decent level without him being stolen by Ryo Hayakawa. You bring up the tickets he gave you a while back, and offer to go with him in a few minutes. He excitedly obliges and you feel accomplished. You've got him all to yourself today.

You head to your room, tie your hair up with a different color ribbon and find the cutest outfit you can find, that isn't too juvenile. You're running back to the phone, however, to hear a familiar voice on the line.

Ryo's talking to Hiroki about him coming over in five minutes to help her with math. You're disgusted by this action as Ryo very well has a friend who is math savvy, and who you're sure has more than enough time for the likes of her. On top of that, you know Hiroki hates math more than anything. The one time you can be alone with Hiroki, this clingy girl is in your way.

Hiroki apologizes over the phone, but you lie and tell him not to worry about it. After hanging up, you sit in your cute outfit and just go over the fact that she just doesn't deserve him.


You regret leaving him. You regret letting him go. You especially regret letting someone like Ryo Hayakawa take him away from you.

You want to break them up. You want Hiroki to escape from whatever spell she's putting on him. You want him to realize that she's not the right girl for him, that she's a manipulative, needy, clingy, possessive brat, and that he could do much better.

What you wish you could do was hit her again. You wish you could smack her in the face any time she omits that obnoxious giggle. You wish you could take Hiroki far, far away from her and banish her from his presence. You wish you could tell her she doesn't deserve to breathe the same air as he or you. You wish you didn't save her so long ago – let her die in that hospital as you and Hiroki live a perfect life together. Without her, you'd have him all to yourself.

You're thinking all of this, and you're realizing a very important fact. Deep inside, you're just as possessive as Ryo. Deep inside, you're just as pathetic as she.

You go on about how she doesn't deserve him. But who are you kidding? You don't deserve him either.