Writer's Note: Honestly? This is one of those "what a neat idea" late-night burps I get when I'm supposed to be asleep. Throughout the Avatar fandom I'm always surprised about how young and innocent everyone seems to think Aang is, and it makes me laugh. Doesn't anyone remember being twelve years old? Doesn't anyone remember having older siblings just itching to corrupt you? So this churned out of my brain when I was supposed to be working. It's probably going to be one of my last updates in a while, so enjoy it =D.
Warning: Contains suggestive and somewhat adult content and should be read with discretion.
The monks were bored.
When it rained at the Southern Air Temple, there was absolutely nothing to do. Airbending indoors was limited, and no one liked getting a good wind with a glider only to smack his head on the ceiling.
The adult monks always took this time to plan future lessons, or to arrange expeditions with the teenaged monks into the other Nations. That left the younger monks to themselves, in rare moments of absolute idle time and infinite boredom.
Aang sat in the tight-knit circle of the boys within his age-bracket: there were six of them, including himself, ranging from twelve to fifteen. He had just turned twelve and was looking forward to learning a thing or two from the older boys, like different techniques on how to bend and what kind of different uses the glider had in mid-air in a pinch.
It's needless to say he wasn't expecting an entire conversation about sex.
He had just sat down to the words, "…trust me, it's better with some sort of cream."
"What are we talking about?" he wondered cheerfully, crossing his legs and leaning forward. "Are we talking about tea?"
The other boys stared at him, then snickered a little. "Oh, yeah, Aang; you're still pretty young, aren't you?" The oldest boy, Xiang, replied.
Aang puffed out his cheeks. "I'm not that young!" he protested. "And I'm almost a master; Monk Gyasto says I'll probably be ready for my tattoos in a few months!"
"This is better than master bending, Aang," another boy, Bo, broke in, his eyes flashing excitedly. "Better than even doing four loops in one gust."
Aang stared at them both. "Now you're just making things up," he accused.
The other boys snickered again, and Aang felt himself go pink. He hated looking stupid, especially in front of the older monks.
Guiren, who was always nice to Aang, leaned in close and whispered, "We're talking about, you know, morning arrivals."
Aang stared, confused. "You mean the post?"
The other boys groaned. "Come on, Aang!" Changpu groaned, a hand at his forehead. "You're twelve; you're not six! I'm sure by now, you know what we're talking about!"
"Allow me, boys," Feng, the second-youngest, said almost proudly. He leaned in close to Aang and, with a cat-like grin, said in a low voice, "We're talkin' about jerking off, Aang."
"Oh, that," Aang said, blinking slowly. "Can't we talk about something else?"
The other boys stared at him, surprised. "Wait, Aang, what?!" Bo spluttered.
Aang crossed his arms, making a face. They were acting ridiculous, really. "You think I don't know about that? Honestly?"
Xiang and Changpu looked at each other, then back to him, nodding. "Well, yeah," Changpu admitted. "I mean, I didn't even know about it until Xiang told me."
Guiren scratched his ear. "I didn't know about it even when they told me."
Feng snorted. "I've known since I was seven."
Aang grinned. "Hey, me too!"
"Aang, you have not," Xiang snapped. "There is no way the darling of the Elder Monks is prone to whacking off in his bunk."
Bo broke in before Aang could protest. "It's not just in the bunk for some," he muttered.
"It's not just whacking, either," Changpu added. "Who cares, anyway? The point is that we now have nothing to teach him."
Aang shook his head. "Wait, that's not true," he protested, always eager to learn. "You said something about cream, and since I know now you weren't talking about tea, what does cream have to do with that?"
Guiren leaned in close. "You know how, sometimes, when you do it for too long, it sort of starts to hurt?"
Aang nodded. "Yeah, that always sucks," he agreed. "Especially when I haven't finished yet."
Xiang put a hand to his forehead, groaning. "I think I still haven't gotten past the 'Aang knows how to masturbate' thing, yet."
Bo thrust a fist into his shoulder, knocking him over with a yelp. "Shut up, we're trying to teach the future generation, here!" he snapped.
"Okay, Aang, so you know when it starts to hurt?" Changpu went on, his hands waving with each word, conveying the importance of what he was saying. "Xiang and I were thinking that we could just use the aftershave cream on our hands and make it easier."
Xiang, from the floor, held up a hand. "If we run out too soon, we could always state that we got razorburn."
Aang covered his mouth, trying to swallow a fit of giggles. "Some sort of burn, anyway," he replied.
His words were answered with a chorus of shared sniggering, which instantly made the giggles come out. The boys spent the next few moments trying to catch their breath.
"Seriously, though," Xiang said, sitting up from the floor and wiping his eyes. "Works like a charm. Lasts longer, too."
Aang's eyes widened, incredibly enchanted by this idea. "You can make it last longer?"
Bo reached forward and rubbed Aang's head affectionately. "Maybe you still have some more corrupting left in you," he teased. Aang batted his hands away and grumbled.
Guiren nodded slowly. "If you're attentive, it can last for, like, an hour."
Aang's eyes started to bug out. "A whole hour?!" he cried. "Without dying?!"
Feng grinned, leaning back on his hands casually. "I've gone for two," he boasted proudly.
"Liar," Xiang snorted. "My cell is next to yours. You last maybe, what? Ten minutes before you squeal like a nun and fall asleep?"
Feng went scarlet, his eyes narrowed as he glared at the older boy. "That's not true!" he protested, sounding desperate.
"Speaking of nuns," Changpu broke in, saving Feng further humiliation. "Did you guys check out the last bunch at the Summer Meeting?" He whistled. "Girls grow up so fast."
Aang frowned, chewing on his lip a little. "I don't think I noticed," he admitted.
"That's because you were still hanging with the girls," Xiang sneered. "We get to hang out with the women."
"Ah, did you guys check out Min this summer? Oh, man," Bo held up his hands and moved them in a manner that suggested curves. "So amazing."
"How could you tell?" Guiren wondered, his eyes wide. "A nun's robes are always so…flowy."
Bo grinned, waggling his eyebrows. "I have my ways," he replied.
Xiang glared at him. "Get out of here right now. You did not."
Aang said nothing, fascinated. His eyes kept darting from one boy to the next, eager to take in as much as he could.
"Well, okay," Bo went pink, scratching the back of his head. "Not all the way. But I so got a feel." He cupped his hands in front of him, waggling his eyebrows again. "And she's a great kisser."
"Brings new meaning to the word 'quick', eh?" Changpu quipped, nudging Bo in the ribs.
"Wow," Aang whispered. "I had no idea that girls could help with that."
Xiang stared at him, smacking a hand to his forehead. "Are you kidding me?" he demanded. "Girls are what it's all about."
"Wait, don't be a prick," Bo suddenly snapped. "Some guys like guys. Right?"
"Is that possible?" Guiren wondered. "I've heard rumours, but no one wants to confirm it for me."
Feng held up a hand, getting into lecture mode. "It's like what the teachers say: 'Love is merely the eye of the entire needle.'"
There was a brief silence. Then Aang said, "Yeah, I've never understood that kind of stuff."
"What it means," Feng answered, his voice sharp. "Is that love itself is blind. Gender and that sort of crap don't matter if you love someone. Grow up, you idiots."
"I think what Feng is trying to say is that he's one of those monks that likes other monks," Xiang replied, grinning.
"You have nothing to worry about," Feng seethed, his face red. "You are all too idiotic and immature for me." With that, he got to his feet and stormed off in a huff. Xiang called him back, but he ignored him. Soon, they heard the sound of a door slamming.
"Well, whatever," Xiang mumbled, looking embarrassed none the less. "In any case, Aang, you know how babies are made, right?"
Aang considered, his hand to his chin. "They talked about it for about ten minutes in health class," he admitted. "So I know that there's something to do with a bed, and lying together, and all of that."
Changpu rolled his eyes. "You know, those teachers are so old-fashioned. How do they expect us to learn anything?"
Bo raised a hand, looking mischievous. "We teach ourselves, of course."
Guiren slapped his hand down, causing the other boy to squeak. "You should treat the nuns with respect," he snapped. "They're not your toys."
Bo and Xiang stared at him. Changpu titled his head to one side. "Hey, Guiren, do you have a girlfriend or something?"
Guiren blushed, looking away. "Maybe," he mumbled.
"Oh! Who was it? Wait, I bet I know…" Bo thought about it, then grinned. "Zi, right?"
Guiren shifted uncomfortably, his face red. "Shut up," he mumbled.
The older boys laughed in reply. "You poor idiot," Xiang snorted. "Zi treats everyone like they're special. Why else does she have the name she has?"
Aang broke in. "Wait, I thought it was because she can run the fastest with her bending?"
The other boys glared at him, obviously upset by this non-sexy explanation. Aang shrugged. "What? It's true; she can!"
"Aang, do you even know what 'fast' means?" Changpu wondered.
"Do you even know what 'sex' means?" Xiang added.
Aang's ears went red. "Yes, I know what both mean, thank you!" he hissed. "I just…don't know all of the details, is all!"
Xiang scooted over to Aang's side and leaned in close, whispering the details of what his understanding of sex was in the younger boy's ear. Aang blushed, then went crimson, then started giggling like an idiot, his hands over his mouth.
When Xiang pulled away, Aang was still giggling, the sound high-pitched and bizarre. They had never heard him make such a sound before. "Great," Bo mumbled, his eyes wide, "you broke him."
Changpu slapped Aang on the back with the flat of his hand. The younger monk yelped, toppling over on his front, ass-over-teakettle. "Ow!" he cried. "You have meaty hands!"
"At least he shut up," Xiang muttered.
Changpu, however, waggled his fingers at Aang, his face almost lecherous. "And how do you think my hands got this meaty?!"
The other boys made faces and groaned, exchanging eye-rolls and facepalms.
Aang sat up. "Okay, so wait, if that's how it's done with girls, how does it work when you're both boys?"
"We need Feng back," Xiang muttered.
"Is he really…you know?" Bo wondered, eyes wide.
Guiren broke in. "You guys should lay off. He's allowed to love who he wants. Don't be jerks."
Aang nodded. "I'm with Guiren. Feng can love who he wants, as long as it doesn't hurt anybody."
Changpu opened his mouth, but Bo shot him a look. "Don't say anything," he snapped. "I know what you're going to say."
Changpu looked hurt, but Bo ignored him. "Anyway, with guys, it's pretty much the same as with a guy and a girl, except…" and this time he leaned over in Aang's other ear, explaining. Aang went red again, but he looked more shocked than anything else.
"Wouldn't that hurt?!" he yelped.
"You get used to it," Xiang blurted, shrugging.
When he realised all eyes were on him, he glared at them. "Oh, shut up," he snapped.
"Wow," Aang rubbed his head, taking it all in. "I didn't realise it was so complicated."
"It's worth it," Guiren smiled, his eyes sparkling a little. "It's so worth it."
"Heh, yeah," Bo nodded, leaning back onto the floor and cushioning his head with his hands. "Girls are awesome."
Changpu nodded his agreement, and Xiang just rolled his eyes. "Love is awesome," he broke in.
No one argued with that.
Later, much later, when his friends were all gone and he was found by Katara and Sokka, Aang had the embarrassing misfortune of having to endure what Sokka thought was "the most enlightening conversation you'll ever have, buddy". When Sokka was through, Aang had to actually bite his tongue and swallow both the protests over the talk and the fact that Sokka, despite being older, had no idea what he was talking about.
It wasn't until a couple of years after the war that Aang finally mustered up the courage to admit that he had already known about sex before Sokka told him. What resulted was one of the most embarrassing displays of dismay that he had ever experienced, which led him to believe that, perhaps, people just expected Aang to have that kind of ignorance. He didn't get why, though.
If anything, the one who knows the most about love is the Avatar.