((A/N: Heeey! My first Hetalia fic. *flails* So happy to have finally written one. Anyway! Written to fill a request on the kink meme. Hope you like it! XD ))
I am invisible.
I am nothing.
It doesn't matter that I'm here.
Because I'm not.
I am invisible…
Silently, Matthew Williams - better known as the nation of Canada - repeated this mantra to himself over and over again. After years of being ignored and over-looked, he had finally come to terms with his existence. Sometimes, though, he had to remind himself of these facts about himself, or else he would only upset himself by trying to speak up during a meeting of the nations.
As the other nations talked about important global matters - reiterating things that Matthew had already thought of and come to conclusions about - Canada hung his head, his blond hair falling to hide his face, his glasses slipping to the edge of his nose, and kept repeating the words in his head.
I am invisible.
I am nothing.
It doesn't matter that I'm here.
Because I'm not.
Across the room, Gilbert Beilschmidt was poking the little birdy on his head in a distracted way. West was rambling on and on about something to do with something that didn't have anything to do with the ex-nation of Prussia, and so Gilbert didn't care in the slightest. He was bored. There was nothing to do because West kept shooting glares at him or grabbing his hair and tugging when he tried to do something fun (like make paper airplanes to throw at England or sneak under the table to go look up the female nations' skirts).
So what was a poor ex-nation to do? The only obvious answer left was the play with the little birdy that always seemed to be around. However, even this got boring quickly. I'Geez,'/I Gilbert thought, looking sourly at West and pouting in his boredom. 'This is no place for the awesome me. I should just sneak out…'
Just as he was about to execute this plan, however, a slight movement in the corner of his eye caught his attention. Blinking, Gilbert looked over, to the spot directly next to America, and noticed that there was someone sitting in the chair there. This someone seemed to be curled in upon himself and muttering under his breath. Gilbert wondered what he was saying. Oh, and look! There was an open seat next to him!
Deciding on a whim - as he often did - to go and sit next to this anonymous boy, Gilbert stood up quite suddenly and began to saunter his way over. A few of the nations glanced at Gilbert questioningly and West glared at him, opening his mouth to say something, but Gilbert waved his brother off and sat down next to the muttering boy, at which point West looked relieved and went back to what he had been doing.
Now that he was sitting next to the boy, Gilbert could hear the words he was muttering over and over, like a chant of some kind:
"I am invisible. I am nothing. It doesn't matter that I'm here. Because I'm not. I am invisible…"
Gilbert's voice carried across the entire room and everyone looked at him, including the boy who had been muttering to himself. Holding up his hands apologetically and giving his most winning grin, Gilbert motioned idly for everyone to continue. It wasn't long before they had all forgotten about him - all except for the boy, who was staring at Gilbert with wide eyes, seeming utterly confused at the fact that Gilbert was looking directly at him.
Amused by the look on the boy's face, Gilbert leaned his elbow against the table and rested his chin in his hand, eyes still fixed on the boy. Well, not boy, technically. He looked very young, yes, but not young enough to be termed "boy". But as Gilbert couldn't for the life of him remember the boy's name, he just decided to call him that. Maybe "cute boy" would be a better term, because he was certainly adorable. Almost as adorable as the little birdy friend of Gilbert's.
Matthew felt his cheeks heating up as Gilbert continued to stare at him. Why had the ex-nation suddenly walked over and sat next to him? And had he actually heard what Matthew had been whispering to himself?
Pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose a little nervously, Matthew blinked at Gilbert. "Prussia…? Is there something you wanted?"
'Holy hell!' Gilbert thought, eyes widening slightly. 'He knows who I am, but I can't place him at all! Think, awesome-brain, think! What's the best way to find out who he is??'
"Oh, you know. I was bored, and you looked like you were talking to yourself, like a crazy person or something." Very smooth. Gilbert silently commended himself. Now to ask for the boy's name! "Anyway, wh--"
He was cut off suddenly by the polar bear sitting in the boy's lap looking up at its chair and speaking. "Who're you?" it asked with a tilted head.
With a sigh that seemed like a sort of resignation, the boy replied, "I'm Canada, eh…"
Gilbert was intrigued. It was like this boy - Canada… Oh, that was his name! Matthew! - was so used to being completely unknown and ignored that he had simply resigned himself to it and played into the role because he felt like that was all he could do.
Clearing his throat, Gilbert drew the Canadian's attention back to himself, which was exactly where everyone's attention should be anyway. "So anyway… Matthew, right?" Widened eyes were his response, as well as a small nod. So he'd gotten the name right. Bonus awesome points to him! "Do you really believe that bullshit you were muttering?"
Matthew had a moment of panic. So Gilbert had heard him. For a moment he considered denying that he'd said anything at all, but that would only seem ridiculous. It didn't matter anyway, did it? Because soon enough, Gilbert wouldn't be able to see him anymore and would completely forget about having any conversation with him.
"Of course I do," he answered finally. "And it's not bullshit. It's true."
Gilbert was shaking his head and it irritated Matthew to no end. Who was Gilbert to think that he knew what Matthew had gone through? Who was Gilbert to---
"Mehr sein als scheinen," Gilbert said quietly, grinning at Matthew. He was rewarded for his deep knowledge by a confused and almost angry look. Gilbert decided at that moment that Canada was cute when he was angry. "It's a Prussian virtue, little birdy," he explained, reaching out and ruffling Matthew's hair, earning himself an affronted look.
"Little birdy…? What kind of---"
"It means," Gilbert continued, speaking over Matthew. The Canadian immediately fell silent, because he knew it was useless to try to compete with anyone for dominance in a conversation. "Be more than you seem to be." He waved a hand at Matthew. "You seem to be invisible and under-rated and over-looked. So be something more."
Leaning forward, Gilbert poked Matthew in the middle of the forehead. Matthew tried to pull away, but only found himself blocked from moving further back by the chair. "Be more than that, little birdy."
Straightening back up in his seat, Gilbert crossed his legs and seemed to be paying close attention to the meeting. In all actuality, though, he was watching Matthew out of the corner of his eye, entertained by the varied expressions flitting across the Canadian's face in rapid succession.
Matthew was carefully considering Gilbert's words. Be more than he was? But how on earth could he be more than he was? Every time he tried to do something to get himself noticed, he either received negative attention because he was mistaken for America or everybody just continued to ignore him anyway!
Heaving a confused sigh, Matthew bent his head forward again, deciding to go back to his earlier thoughts. Because obviously Gilbert had forgotten about him already.
Which turned out to be not true, as a moment later Gilbert was poking him on the back of the head. "You're really giving up that easily? Geez, maybe you're not cool enough to be a little birdy…" Matthew gave Gilbert a startled and annoyed look and was about to say something when Gilbert continued talking, right over him again. "I mean, seriously! You didn't even try to do anything! You just sat there and thought about it. You hafta take action, y'know! And really---"
Matthew had had enough. Snapping, he grabbed the front of Gilbert's shirt and shook him. "What do you think I did every day of my life? I kept trying and trying and nobody noticed me!" He didn't realize that his voice was carrying across the room and suddenly there were a few people looking towards him. "It's better to just accept my fate and be invisible! It hurts less that way!" More eyes turned towards him and Alfred, who was sitting just next to him, gave him a worried look.
"And another thing…!" Gilbert held up his hands in a placating way suddenly.
"Whoa, birdy. Calm down. I know I'm hot and everyone wants to be this close to me, but seriously. I'd rather if you're gonna be this close that it didn't come with yelling…"
At that point, Matthew suddenly realized that his face was about an inch from Gilbert's and that he had somehow managed to pull the Prussian into his lap. Blushing suddenly, Matthew let go of Gilbert's shirt, but the ex-nation had already draped his arms around the Canadian's shoulders.
"Whaaaat? You're gonna get nervous again? Don't do that, little birdy." And quite suddenly, Matthew found Gilbert's lips on his and then his eyes were closing and his hands were in the Prussian's shirt again…
…and then Gilbert was ripped off of him by forceful hands and the entire assemblage was staring at the two of them. America was yelling at Gilbert for kissing his little brother while Germany was burying his face in his hands in absolute embarrassment. Gilbert merely grinned and winked at Matthew as Alfred continued to ream him out. All the other eyes were directed at Matthew though, and he couldn't help but smile a little.
After a small spat, in which Matthew screamed a lot at Alfred and Alfred sputtered a lot and made accusing glares at Gilbert, the meeting was adjourned for another day on the grounds that emotions had run too high at this point.
And so Matthew found himself leaving the conference room hand-in-hand with a very boisterous Gilbert, who kept nudging the nations walking by them and bragging about the fact that he had just kissed the second biggest country in the world. Matthew rolled his eyes and poked the chick he had often seen on Gilbert's head, which got the desired response from the Prussian.
"Hey! Don't touch the awesome little birdy…!"
With a grin, Matthew pushed his glasses up his nose, leaned in to place his lips against Gilbert's ear, and whispered, "But I thought II/I was an awesome little birdy."
'Well,' Matthew thought as the Prussian spluttered for a moment in disbelief before grinning at the Canadian wickedly, 'At least I caught Gilbert's attention… Maybe I'm not invisible after all.'