Disclaimer – I don't own Bleach or Ayatsuri Sakon.
In Karakura Town, the police received a lot of odd calls on a certain place in the jurisdiction. Nothing, however, was found to indicate that anything was amiss. The place was jokingly referred to as the happy haunting, and many very silly police reports were filed about the place.
Of course, nearly every complaint against the place was brought in by a woman named Yami Nabara. She was a rather obese woman, who caked her makeup so think; it was to the point of no return. Her red lips were gummy, and stuck together so bad that when she spoke and parted her lips, the lipstick would stick, string and break apart. This made most police officers green from the ghastliness of it.
While she looked like possibly a matradee of… the illegal arts… she was in fact, simply an old woman who happened to also have a huge amount of wealth.
"Listen, the only reason that I am concerned about this place is because my baby grand niece lives in the area," the woman sated firmly.
"Mam… we have checked Urahara's shop many times. It sells candy, and novelties. Nothing more, nothing less," the police officer sighed.
"I am absolutely certain that man is selling drugs… or child pornography… or maybe he's in the black market for selling children. The last thing I want if for my darling niece to be influenced by this… or even kidnapped for that matter."
"We'll see what we can do," the officer sighed, then turned to another person after she had left. "Let lieutenant Tomo and his dumb partner know, we have another candy shop case."
"Shouldn't we give these to someone who doesn't personally know the shop owner?"
"I've gone in… nothing the hell is wrong with that place. It is just that Ms. Yami can be quite… problematic unless she knows we've done something… she'll lay off of us for a week,"
Urahara sat behind the counter, his feet propped up as Jinta and Ururu cleaned the store. Suddenly, he saw a familiar face step in. "Good afternoon, Atsuo-kun!"
"Sorry Urahara… but its official police business… again…" the other man bemoaned as his partner stepped in, rather nosey about the place. Tomo Atsuo stepped over to the counter to talk to his old friend, whispering as he did so. "You know he… him… my partner… gets suspicious feelings of this place…"
"Ehh… well, I didn't think that there was a murder in this area… but anyways, it is possibly because he is spiritually aware," Urahara chuckled. "I am lucky that he so dumb that the memory modifier works every time!"
"Hey…" the young police officer partner whispered to Jinta and Ururu. "Does that guy traffic drugs of anything?"
Jinta glanced over at Urahara, then grinned. "Yup. He traffics humans. Why do you think we're stuck here?"
"My partner and I can get the two of you to safety,"
"Hey… then you wanna see where he keeps the rest of the kids so you can rescue them too," Jinta still smirked.
"Most defiantly!" The young cop followed the two kids over to the back of the store, where Jinta opened the trap door. "They're down here!"
Suddenly there was a huge thumping sound. This caused Atsuo's face change to one of sudden disbelief. "Please tell me, what I think just happened, didn't…"
"I think your partner in crime just fell into our basement," Urahara laughed.
"Hey! I don't think this place is for human trafficking! I think it's for some sort of underground dog fighting!"
"Great…" One police officer was displeased. "That sounds like some dumb joke Isshin would come up with…"
Minutes later Atsuo's partner was up stairs, his memories modified and the few bumps patched up. Said other officer glared at Urahara. "How many times have we had this done?"
"Mmm… every time he comes in here, though it didn't start… him coming here… until he became your partner," Urahara chirped.
"Hey, you want to go look and find monsters? We know where to find them," Jinta stated on the down low to the partner.
"You used the English word monster? Perhaps you mean the word mobster?" the man stated.
"Yeah! Yeah! The people who supply this place with drugs!"
"All right then, lets track them down so I can make a bust on this old man!"
Atsuo spent a few more minutes complaining to Urahara about his partner, when Tessai came into the room. "You two do know… that young police officer went off after some mob boss that supplies us with Jinta and Ururu?"
"Nani!" Both Atsuo and Urahara looked at him in confusion.
"Apparently, he thought they meant mobster, instead of monster… the English word. They basically took him out to chase hollows.
"Shit!" Atsuo shook his head.
"I'll launch the red flare… as soon as I find it…" Urahara muttered, disappearing into the back of his shop.
"It seems Tomo-san has used cuss words a lot more then he usually does," Tessai stated.
When Jinta had said monsters, he had meant monsters. The cop, soon learned this the hard way, by being chased by said monster, while the two kids chased after it.
"Hey, Hollow bait, I'm going in for the kill!" Jinta yelled, striking at the back of the monster to make it disappear. Suddenly, a red flare went off. "Man, I wanted to play some more!"
Ururu nodded her head in agreement. Jinta pulled out the memory modifier and flashed it. The officer looked straight at them. After a few minutes, he spoke up. "Wasn't I trying to arrest you two for selling drugs?"
"Run Ururu!" Jinta yelled.
Atsuo went back to the cop car, because he figured he would find his partner there, at a best-case guess. He also happened to be right that his partner would be overly cheerful, however, he didn't know why. "It's my turn to drive!"
"Fine…" Lieutenant Tomo stated, getting in on the passenger side.
Suddenly, a very sod voice piped up from the back seat as the car took off to get back to the station. "Hi…"
"What the fuck!" Atsuo turned around to see Ururu handcuffed and sitting on the back seat. "What's she doing here?"
"She and that boy were trying to sell drugs. I was only able to catch her, so she'll possibly rat on him," his partner chuckled.
"As if…" the other man stated. "Can my day get any worse?"
When Yourichi arrived at the station, dragging Jinta by the ear, she found a rather hysterical sight in front of her. Paper cranes were all over the place, while Ururu folded them and placed them on the desk of various officers… so much so that they had become covered. Yami Nabara was arguing with Atsuo's partner, that Ururu was a victim, not a criminal.
Yourichi's eyebrow twitched. "You know, Jinta… this time you really did it…" Somehow, she was able to get things cleared up without the use of a memory modifier.
A few months later, Atsuo ended up bringing a cop friend with him to the bar. Urahara smiled, and after they had downed a few drinks, spoke up. "So… long time no see… with official business anyways…"
"We… stopped getting complaints from that woman…" Atsuo muttered, for some reason avoiding the name.
"You mean, Yami Nabara," Yourichi snorted into her drink. "I wouldn't think that she would back down that easily."
"That woman's dead as a doornail… sempai… I should know!" the female cop blurted out.
"Uhh… Officer Tachibana.." Atsuo tried to reason with her.
"She goes and accused my nephew of stealing one of our family puppets…"
"Her family is the Tachibana family that is related to Saemon…" Atsuo muttered.
"Ahh… the great national treasure of bunraku!" Yourichi stated calmly. "I went and saw him… and I've seen Tachibana Sakon perform too…"
"That's my lovely… lovely nephew!" the woman cried out. "He then gets stuck in a psycho ward because of her, and blamed for her murder."
"Ehh…" Yourichi seemed surprised, however Atsuo shook his head, telling her not to ask about the details.
"I also think his puppet is possessed!" Tachibana Kaoruko hiccupped.
"Oi!" Isshin stated as he suddenly joined them. "Who is your lady friend?"
"I'm not dating sempai… I'm dating the doctor who… was so nice to Sakon…" the woman hiccupped again.
"Apologies… I trained both her and her rival when they were in academy… he's said some crude things while they were helping us on a case…"
"Let me guess… a pig?" Yourichi piped up.
"Oh yeah he is!" Kaoruko stated, getting into a heated discussion.
"Let me guess, you brought her to spend time with our female friend here?" Tessai commented.
"Yup," Atsuo muttered into his drink. "Let her get off some steam, before she takes it all home to her family…"
"Ehh…" Isshin scratched his head. "Why doesn't she call you teacher?"
"Because…. She thinks it makes me to old and thinks that I need to look attractive towards younger woman," This comment from Atsuo caused the three other men to look at each other. "What?" Only to have the least serious of them burst out laughing.
Author's note –
Tomo Atsuo – Tomo Atsuo is a shingami that soul society thinks is dead. He's lost a good deal of his memory, and doesn't remember that Isshin was his former captain. The one thing he remembers is a small boy with white hair and teal eyes… who called him Uncle. He doesn't even remember how he knew this boy. Urahara took care of him, and later he met up with Isshin again, as a cop. He sometimes makes short appearances in my Bleach fanfics.
Yami Nabara – Her name translates as the 'Black Rose'. Her great-grand niece is named after her, and is the classmate of Kurosaki Karin and Yuzu. Let's just say, you can bet she has a similar attitude as her aunt. Yami Nabara was created as a murder victim for my Ayatsuri Sakon fanfic, The Black Rose.