A/N: This one shot reveals one problem that I have with the all too perfect Edward Cullen!
Disclaimer: These characters are unfortunately owned by Stephanie Meyer.
WARNING: Three very steamy lemons ahead. Take rating seriously!!!
It was all Alice's fault.
Edward, Nessie, Jake and I were watching Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire and I had innocently pointed out that there was a remarkable likeness between Edward and the actor who played Cedric Diggory. It was a completely innocent comment. Only meant to make the movie slightly more interesting for my hunky vampire husband. He was only watching it with me so he could keep an eye on Nessie and Jake, who were cuddled together on the loveseat.
Other then Alice the house was completely empty. Every one else was off doing other things, so it was only my husband, my child and my best friend who witnessed my utter embarrassment. Not that anyone (even me) knew how truly embarrassing it was at the time.
The thought had barely crossed my mind when Alice gasped. Honestly if she couldn't see the future nothing would have happened and I could have kept my dirty little fantasy to myself. But no. I have to spend eternity with a sister who can see the future and a husband who can, unfortunately, read her mind.
So when the fantasy, idea really, of Edward as Cedric Diggory went flitting through my head I hadn't a clue that Alice would pick up on it. So when she gasped and Edward stiffened next to me I was just as worried as everyone else. How the hell could she possibly know something I'd barely taken the time to fantasize about? As far as I knew she couldn't, so she must have been gasping about something else. And Alice very rarely gasped about something that wasn't a big deal, so Nessie, Jake and me freaked out.
"What is it?" I asked.
Both Edward and Alice turned to stare at me at exactly the same time. Their faces blank with shock. Up until that point my sex life with Edward had been vanilla at best. He was over a hundred and seemed to have this outdated idea about what kinds of things were expectable in the bedroom. Most of his ideas revolved around being respectful to me, for the most part I didn't mind his gentleman ideals. Like how he always let me finish first, that was great. But I had to think that after a few decades his gentlemanliness would start getting on my nerves.
In fact to a certain extent it already had.
Thus the Edward as Cedric Diggory fantasy. All work and average play makes Bella have very naughty fantasies. That her know-it-all sister picks up on and her hear-it-all husband listens in on. Life just isn't fair.
"Nothing," Alice squeaked. "It's nothing." She raced over to the computer and started typing furiously.
Nessie, Jake and I turned to Edward. He was still staring at me, but apparently was aware enough to respond. "Everything is fine. Just an interesting vision, that's all."
Both Nessie and Jake settled down to watch the rest of the movie, but I was still too agitated. Why had both Alice and Edward looked at me like that? I'd barely thought about Edward as Cedric for more then a few milliseconds, and I certainly hadn't even considered bring up the possibility of role playing with Edward. There was no way he'd go for it, so there was no point in bring it up. How could Alice have a vision about something that had no possibility of happening?
Behind the computer Alice's face went blank again. Edward glanced over at her. "Damn it," she muttered, suddenly moving away from the screen.
Edward's forehead wrinkled and a calculating look entered his eyes. Alice stiffened and her face went blank once more. "Oh would you two just make up your minds?!" she demanded.
"Okay, what is going on?" Jake asked. "Will who make up their mind about what?"
"Nothing is going on," Edward said. "Just finish the movie."
I hadn't a clue what was going on. Alice wouldn't say anything and Edward refused to talk. I was one hundred percent sure that their strange behavior had nothing to do with my naught fantasy, which really wasn't all that naughty now that I thought about it. Honestly all I'd thought about was Edward as Cedric Diggory. Nothing else had really happened. Alice freaked everyone out with her gasping before my fantasy could get anymore defined.
But with Edward currently spying on Nessie and Jake, I had plenty of time to think. And think I did. That man of mine was always handsome but dressed all preppy with his wild hair combed to the side, he was swoon worthy. The comparison was meant to be really. Edward certainly looked seventeen and Cedric would be forever seventeen due to the fact that he… died at the end of the movie. But that little fact didn't have to ruin my fantasy. Anything is possible in a fantasy.
So… in my little daydream Cedric lives. He lives, doesn't marry Cho Chang and becomes a professor at Hogwarts. And little old Bella finds out that she's witch… the possibilities were endless. Perhaps I purposefully didn't do any of my homework for his class so that he'd be forced to give me a detention. After months of detentions fail to get me to do my homework, he has to think up a different kind of punishment. Perhaps… a firm spanking!
God if I still could have blushed I would have been as red as a tomato.
Thankfully I was alone in the cottage at the time, so no one was there to notice how suddenly I was embarrassed for no discernable reason. I mean to think Edward ever dressing up like a fictional character so he could spank me. It was beyond ridiculous. It was even more ridiculous to think that after my spanking he would rub the sting from my bottom. He would remove my robes and unbuckle his belt. There was simply no way he would wrap the supple leather around my wrists, binding my hands at the small of my back. He just didn't have it in him to grab my hair, pulling me back against his chest so he could unbutton my shirt.
I felt my chest rise and fall rapidly, filling my lungs with unnecessary oxygen. This little, absurd fantasy was getting me all hot and bothered and Edward wouldn't be back until morning. Nessie was spending the night at the Black's, under Jake's watchful eye, with Billy and evidentially Edward serving as chaperons. If I didn't stop my dirty thoughts soon, I would surely explode. Unfortunately I was having quite a hard time stopping.
With my shirt unbuttoned Edward, I mean Professor Diggory would begin playing with my nipples through the lace of my bra. He would nibble harshly on my earlobe whispering all sorts of naughty things, like, "I'm going to fuck you so hard, you'll be so exhausted you will finally have a good reason not to do your homework." Or, "I'm going to ride you until all you can feel is my hard cock in your pretty pink pussy."
Even the thought of Edward talking to me that way was making me unbelievably wet. As fast as I could I zipped into mine and Edward's bedroom and stripped. I slipped under the covers, spread my legs and ran my fingers down my body until they lay between my thighs. I hadn't done this in years, since before Edward and I married. There had been no reason to, even vanilla sex fulfilled the ache of sexual desire. There had been no reason to do it myself when Edward was more then willing to do it for me.
But Edward wasn't around and the desire was just as strong as ever.
I circled my finger around my clit and returned to Hogwarts.
Having teased me into moaning and groaning and wiggling my ass against his obvious arousal, Professor Diggory pulls out his wand. His actual wooden wand, not the one in his pants. He mumbles some spell that tears my bra open, letting my breast spring free. He sets his wand aside so that he might grip my breasts and torment my nipples. Helplessly trapped between his hot body and the desk in his classroom all I can do is moan and thrash my head back and forth.
Finally Professor Diggory releases my breasts. He pushes me forward until my upper body is pressed against the smooth surface of the desk. He flips up my skirt and pulls my panties down to my knees. With firm hands on my thighs he forces my legs to part as far as they can, leaving my most intimate area ruthlessly exposed.
I glance over my shoulder to watch him unbutton his trousers. Unzzzipppp. His long, hard cock springs free, pale with a drip of cum hanging on its engorged tip. I can't help myself, I groan at the sight, imagining how it will feel pumping inside of me.
Professor Diggory brushes my nether lips with the tip of his cock. A strangled scream breaks from my lips as he pushes inside just an inch, before pulling out. I pull on my bonds, ineffectively. He's teasing me again. Teasing me with satisfaction. I know, I just know that if he'd penetrate me completely I'd cum.
I begin begging him. "Please, Professor, please!"
He gives me one more glorious inch before pulling out entirely. He rubs the length of his cock against my wet lips.
In reality I waited a moment, savoring the feeling of being teased by my imaginary Edward, before I thrust my fingers into my throbbing pussy.
In my minds eye, Edward (i.e. Professor Diggory) had pushed into me to the hilt. I came in an instant. The fantasy vanishing from my view. Above me was my bedroom ceiling.
I was naked and alone in my bed coming down from one of the best orgasm that I'd ever had on my own. I got out of bed. I had to move quickly. Edward couldn't know what I'd been doing. It was just too embarrassing. I threw the windows open, he would be able to smell my arousal. I ripped the sheets and the blankets from the bed, he'd be able to feel the slight damp from my cum.
I felt and heard the telltale pound of Edward's feet mere moments after I finished putting fresh sheets and blankets on our bed. I was still utterly nude and my thighs were slick with cum. If I didn't move fast, he'd know. I dashed into the bathroom and cleaned myself off in a few milliseconds. Edward was seconds away from the door when I pulled on a thin sun dress. No time for panties and barely any time for hiding my hastily stripped off cloths under the bed.
He'd find it all. I knew he would. The soled sheets and blanket in the laundry room. The damp washcloth in bathroom, that reeked of arousal. My clothes hastily stuffed under the bed. He'd find it and being the sharp boy he was he'd know what I was up to.
I was sure that he knew when I'd masturbated before we married, even though I only ever did it when he went on extended hunting trips. Oh, I'd throw the windows open and turn the fan on high. Change the sheets and whatnot, but he knew. The look on his face told me that he knew. He'd never say anything. He would just smile and kiss me.
I hadn't a clue how he would react now that we were married.
Edward burst through the front door and I zipped into the living room to meet him in a vain attempt to distract him. It probably wouldn't work. But I could try. I skipped into his arms and sealed my lips over his. His hands came up to cup my cheeks. He wasn't cold and hard anymore but I felt the strength in his hands as he pushed me away. His eyes were black. With lust or fury? I couldn't tell.
His nostrils flared surely taking in the scent of my cum that permeated the cottage. He breezed past me to the laundry room. I could hear the rustling of fabric, his over exaggerated sniff. I crossed my arms. Sure I was embarrassed, but I refused to apologize for what I'd done. It's my body and he was supposed to be away for the rest of the night. I was not ashamed. I wasn't.
Edward was in my face again. Clenched in one hand were the soled sheets and in the other was the washcloth I'd used to clean myself. He ran his nose across my collarbone. Oh, he was feeling lusty. That was good. I didn't have to defend myself. He thought it was sexy… hopefully.
My dress shredded under his fingers, he'd thrown the sheets on the ground and now threw me on top of them. He stripped in a second and was on top of me. I groaned at the feeling of his smooth skin against my own. He felt so good. This was so much better than imagining him between my legs.
"Oh, Edward," I moaned as he slid into me.
He laughed arrogantly into my neck. The utter confidence of that laugh, the fact that my actions turned him on instead of angering him and the feel of his long pulsing length deep inside of me made me cum in an instant. Which was rather embarrassing.
Edward kept on going, thankfully not commenting on how quickly I'd climaxed. His thrusts were hard and sure, flooding the air with the thick scent of my arousal. Edward growled against my chest and sucked one of my nipples into his mouth. My back arched. The new angle let him hit me in a different spot and I saw stars. For some reason I was so much more sensitive to his touch than I usually was. I didn't know if I'd "primed the pump" by masturbating and that had affected how Edward's body felt against my body. I honestly didn't care.
I gripped Edward's tight butt and kept my back arched. He just felt so good at that angle. His deep growl signaled his pending climax, that sound never failed to turn me on. It didn't fail this time and as he roared his completion. I exploded into my third orgasm of the day. A fabulous day by all accounts…
"Why did you come home?" I asked as the thought struck me. How in the hell did he know what I'd been doing? Unless…
"Alice!" I exclaimed, embarrassed. My sister saw me… Oh no!
Edward managed to look sheepish. "She called me," he admitted. I groaned and disengaged from my husband's body. I hastily slipped into my closet looking for something to wear. There was no way I was going to be embarrassed and naked. That was just too much. "Don't be upset, love," Edward whispered. I felt him press up against my back. He was still blissfully naked. And aroused.
Damn these insatiable vampire desires of mine.
I'd nearly forgotten about my Cedric Diggory fantasy when Edward attempted the impossible. I was sure that I'd have a heart attack when I walked into the cottage a few weeks later. Hanging on the door was a garment bag with a note covered in Alice's elegant hand telling me to "put this on." I didn't think much of it because Alice switched out my entire wardrobe every few weeks.
But when I opened the door I was so shocked I nearly had a heart attack. A heart attack. I was going to have a damn heart attack. Someone had moved all the furniture out of the living room and had replaced it with a teacher's desk, a black board and a student's desk. I dropped the garment bag. Where was Nessie? She couldn't see this. She couldn't know that her parents (specifically her mother) were perverts. My phone buzzed in my pocket. I flipped it to my ear.
"Don't worry, Bella," Alice said. "Nessie's spending the night with her aunts and uncles. Enjoy Professor Diggory!" She hung up but not before I heard quite a bit of laughing in the back ground.
I couldn't believe it. Had this all been thrown together by Alice? Was I surprising Edward or was he surprising me? If I threw on whatever was in this garment bag (probably a Hogwarts school girl costume) and sat in that student desk would Edward come in as surprised as I had been?
This would never work if I was surprising Edward. Vanilla sex was one thing, asking him to screw me up against a desk dressed up like a fictional character was quite another. Unless it was his idea it just wasn't going to happen. This would only work if he was supposed to be surprising me. Surely Alice of all people would know that…
But Alice would know that. Which meant that this was all Edward's doing. Alice's gasp and muttering about "you two just make up your minds" while we were watching Harry Potter suddenly made sense. She'd seen this little role playing fantasy of mine happening as soon as the thought occurred to me. And just as quickly she'd seen that I'd never actually ask Edward to help me play it out so she'd stopped her planning. But then she'd started right back up. Why?
I certainly hadn't suddenly decided to tell Edward how much the thought of him as a fictional professor turned me on. But he would have seen what was going on in Alice's head just as soon as Alice saw the future. Suddenly Edward's calculating look took on a new meaning. Well damn! My husband, my prude of a husband was going to act out my fantasy. How in the hell did I get so lucky?
I snatched up the garment bag and changed clothes as fast as I could. I didn't want Edward to get home with me still dressed as myself. For tonight I was Isabella Swan the naughty student of Professor Cedric Diggory, i.e. Edward Cullen. I was sure if it could my heart would have been pounding, my cheeks flushed red as I took my seat at the student's desk, my desk. I could have squealed I was so excited. Edward was playing out one of my dirty day dreams! This opened up a world of opportunity for our sex life. All sorts of different kinds of role playing, all sorts of different positions, if he was willing to do this was there anything he wasn't willing to do?
I started making a mental list of all the things I wanted to try, so when the front door banged open, I jumped. I turned in my seat and gasped. My costume was a carbon copy of all the girl's uniforms from the movie, but Edward's costume… he was a wet dream come true. He'd managed to tame his hair and force it into the same combed style that the actor wore in the movie. He'd even gotten contact lenses to match the actor's blue/green eyes. He wore floor length grey robes with grey pants, a button down white shirt with a black tie tucked beneath a black sweater vest. His belt was a little longer then necessary, thick and black.
He was sex on two legs. I felt my panties dampen. Ed- excuse me- Professor Diggory's nostril's flared and I knew he could smell it. He stalked forward and stopped right in front of my desk. From my seated position I could clearly see the tenting in his pants. We wouldn't get very far in my fantasy if we were both so damn aroused.
I sat up a little straighter. I wanted this to happen too much to ruin it by getting so turned on I just jumped my husband. I cleared my throat, Professor Diggory frowned down at me. "I'm here for my detention, Professor."
He snorted. "This is your third detention this week, Ms. Swan." His accent was so perfect I moaned, he ignored me. "After all the lines you've written with regard to your tardiness and turning your work in on time, I'd hoped that the message might have stuck." The scent of my arousal had permeated the room. He raised his eyebrow but didn't comment. "It seems I'm going to have to try a different kind of punishment on you, Ms. Swan." He moved to the black board and picked up a piece of chalk.
"You'll start with lines. Then I'll administer a little test to see how much you've learned. If you haven't absorbed the lesson to my satisfaction, you'll begin writing a different set of lines. Then I'll test you and so on until you've learned. Do you understand, Ms. Swan?"
I nodded, a little shocked. He'd really planned this out well. Reality was turning out to be so much more fun then my fantasy had been. Professor Diggory turned and wrote on the black board. "I will not fail to turn in my homework in hopes of getting a detention with Professor Diggory."
I gasped as I imagined a student might if presented with such a statement. The smile he sent my way was devilish. "I'm not stupid, Ms. Swan. You turn in your homework on time in all of your other classes. There is really no other logical reason why you'd fail to do so in my class… Unless, of course, there was something special about me."
"I never knew you thought quite so highly of yourself, Professor Diggory," I said, trying to sound like a disgruntled student, who just got caught red handed. He was in my face in a second. His lips mere centimeters away from mine.
"I didn't ask you to talk back, did I, Ms. Swan?" he demanded. The fury in his voice sounded so genuine, I swallowed. I shook my head. "Good, get out your parchment and quill and start writing." He turned away from me and I floundered. I didn't have a quill and parchment.
"Professor?" I said, tentatively. He wasn't going to like this… Professor Diggory (mental girlish giggle) had reached his desk, but turned at my call. He glared at my empty desk and obvious lack of supplies.
"You came unprepared?" His tone told me I'd pay for coming empty handed. I swallowed again and nodded. He retrieved the quill, ink well and parchment from his desk and slammed them on mine. The poor wooden desk nearly buckled under the force of his blow. "Start writing, now."
I snatched up the quill, dipped it in the ink and began writing. I could imagine how this might be an adequate punishment for a human. Writing line after line of the same thing could be quite monotonous, but after years of high school and years of high school still waiting in the future I wasn't about to complain, even mentally. Also the writing probably took a toll on the hands and wrists, but being a vampire certainly wasn't without its perks.
I filled the front of the parchment with line after the line of "I will not fail to turn in my homework in hopes of getting a detention with Professor Diggory." When I finished the last line on the front of the page, Ed- Professor Diggory stopped me by slapping his hand down over my parchment. He picked up the page and read over my work. He put the page back on my desk and stepped back.
"Stand up," he said. I hesitated a moment. "I said, stand up!" I stood up. "Come here." I walked up to him, hoping that the sex would start soon, my panties were soaked. He positioned me in front of his desk, about a foot from the edge. "Place your hands on the top of my desk." I did. Doing so forced my body to bend, thrusting my ass out.
Professor Diggory pulled my robes from my shoulders, they pooled at my feet. The cool air of the cottage kissed my thighs as Edward's hand came down hard on my ass. I squealed. I couldn't help it. The spank had just been so sudden. I really hadn't been expecting it at all.
"When is the next assignment for this class due?" he asked. I was drawing a blank. Not just because I hadn't a clue when the next assignment was due but because I couldn't remember where my mouth was or how it worked.
Then he spanked me again. "When is the next assignment for this class due?" he asked again.
"I-I-I-I don't know," I admitted. He spanked me once more. It didn't hurt, but it did sting which told me that he was using quite a bit of force. I was honestly about to hyperventilate. This spanking man, was not the man I married. But oh ho, was he making me crazy. A good kind of crazy, though.
"You don't know," he said calmly. Too calmly. My breathing became little more then gasps.
"No." He spanked me again and I squealed. "Sit down."
Shit, no sex. I hobbled back to my desk. The hobbling was for the character's benefit. He'd probably hit me pretty hard and if I'd been human there was no doubt in my mind that'd be hobbling. I flopped down in my desk, in a huff. I was horny and he was teasing me. Teasing me! He'd never teased me before.
Professor Diggory (mental sneer) erased the first statement he had me write and began writing another. "I will not get so distracted by Professor Diggory's spanking that I forget when my homework is due." I sighed and picked up my quill.
"What no sass?" he asked.
"Let's just say I've learned my lesson," I mumbled.
He chuckled arrogantly. "That's not the only lesson you'll be learning tonight," he muttered.
I huffed and returned to my lines. I finished only half the parchment when Professor Diggory stopped me. He summoned me to his desk with crook of his finger. I got up, eagerly anticipating more spanking. If I wasn't horny enough to mount a chair, I'd have considered drawing this little interlude out for as long as Edward was prepared to make it last. As it was, however, the need to cum was becoming a pressing matter. I honestly didn't know how much longer I was likely to last.
Professor Diggory put me in the same position I'd been in before. Except this time he pulled off his robe. Then he pulled off his belt. I nearly screamed I was so excited. He was going to tie me. Edward, my Edward was going to tie me up! He stood behind me. I hadn't a clue what he was doing, I was even more confused when I felt the soft leather of the belt around me thighs. He was going to tie my legs together? What the hell?
He buckled my legs together. He freakin' buckled my legs together.
Professor Diggory moved back into my line of sight. He removed his sweater vest and untied his tie, before moving back behind me. My wrists were pulled out from under me. I couldn't believe that he'd actually surprised me. He had my hands at the small of my back before I could blink. His tie wrapped around my wrists. Neither of the bindings was any match for my strength, but it was the thought that counts.
He gripped me by the hair and stirred me back to my desk. He forced me to sit, picked up the quill and put the end in my mouth. He then returned to the black board, erased the previous statement and wrote, "I will do whatever Professor Diggory asks of me from now on." Professor Diggory sat behind his desk and looked pointedly at me.
He actually expected me to write with a pen in my mouth? I had half a mind to rip his tie to shreds… but… if I did what he apparently wanted the sex was sure to come quicker then if I misbehaved. Damn it. I dipped the tip of the quill into the ink pot and began writing. It was remarkable how legible the lines were. I was writing with a quill in my mouth and my handwriting was still better then it had been when I was a human. It just figured. He stopped me when I finished filling up the page by snatching the quill from my mouth.
He picked up the parchment to admire my handiwork. "I think I'm going have this framed," he mused.
Professor Diggory grabbed me by the hair, pulled me up from my desk and stirred me back over to his desk. This time he had me facing him, pressing my bottom up against the edge of this desk. Very deliberately he reached under my skirt and pulled my panties down until they caught on the belt that still bond my legs. With one hand he ripped my shirt open scattering buttons all over the living room. My bra torn down the center, breasts bouncing free and nipples pebbling in arousal. I couldn't help it, I moaned.
He palmed my breasts and looked me in the eye defiantly. "You're not to tell a soul what I've done to you," he whispered fiercely.
At first I didn't understand what he meant. Why would I tell anyone? Who would I tell? If I told Alice, she'd tell Jasper who would tell Emmett who would make fun of me for the rest of my life (which, as it happened, would be a very long time). Then I realized. He was still in character. I professor wouldn't want anyone to know that he was screwing a student, he could get fired. A very good actor, my husband.
"I won't, I promise," I gasped. Surprised that I could still talk. If the look on Edward's face told me anything it was that he was furious that I could still talk. His grip on my breast became bruising, almost painful and absolutely delightful.
He pushed me up onto the top of the desk, forced me to lay down and pushed my legs into my chest. Holding me in that position with his hands on the back of my thighs I felt the first brush of his erection, through his pants. Why the HELL did he still have his pants on?! He continued to torment me by rubbing me with his covered cock. I was wiggling, whining senselessly and rubbing back against him after a few minutes. He kept up his assault on my sanity for far too long before I finally heard the happiest noise of my life.
The zip of his zipper coming down, the fall of his pants to the floor and finally the creek of the floorboards as he stepped closer to my writhing, desperate body.
The first brush of the thick head of his penis against my swollen, wet lips made me scream. The first thrust and I came undone. He laughed at the swiftness of my orgasm, not stopping his thrusting for a moment. His ruthless thrust, retreat, thrust, retreat, was driving me crazy. I'd just had the most insanely good orgasm of my life and he wasn't anywhere near done with me.
No, he climbed onto the desk with me, taking me at an entirely new angle. I could feel the slap of his testicles against my upturned butt and nothing had ever felt so good in my life. Edward moved my legs to the crook of one of his arms, forcing my body to the side, so that he could suckle one of my nipples into his mouth and I came again.
It was good. It was so good I didn't think I'd survive another orgasm. I was mumbling inarticulately by the time I came down from my second orgasm. It just wasn't fair that he could be so controlled and one thrust, suckling my nipple for a second sent me spiraling into orgasm. He finally started growling against my chest. He was close, very close.
Damn that sound. Damn it to hell.
I felt my traitorous body getting ready to orgasm again. With one final, hard thrust and loud growl Edward came with me coming right after him.
We lay on top of the desk still tangled together for a moment before Edward started to laugh. Not the arrogant laugh of Professor Diggory, but the happy, fun laugh of Edward Cullen. He removed the belt and tie and helped me off the desk. Pulling the tattered clothes from my body as he directed me towards our bedroom. We fell into bed laughing. It was all rather ridiculous once I thought about it. Here we are, parents, married, living within a few miles of our entire family, playing Professor Diggory and Naughty Bella.
We fell into a comfortable silence after a while, each of us laughing randomly as the mood struck. I'd never felt so buoyant, so happy. Not even after the first time Edward and I made love. Somehow doing this, living out my fantasy was so special because it was so unexpected.
Edward leaned up on one of his elbows and looked down at me. "Alice saw this happening," he explained. As if I needed an explanation. As if he'd even have done this for me if Alice hadn't seen it happening. "She also saw that you'd never tell me about your fantasy," he went on.
I was sure I looked sheepish. Honestly if I ever told him it would have been hundreds of years later, long after the fantasy had lost its luster.
"Why, Bella?" he whispered. He wanted to know WHY? How ridiculous was that?
I snorted. "Edward, if I told you that I fantasized about you spanking me, you'd be appalled and you know it. Husbands just didn't spank their wives one hundred years ago," I said looking away from him.
I expected a swift agreement. Then perhaps for him to tell me that it would never happen again. Now that we were talking I realized how lucky I was to have this one, perfect, crystal clear memory. And that would be enough, it would have to be enough.
"You can tell me anything, Bella. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for you," he said firmly.
"I got a few bruises and you refused to have sex with me. You might live in the twenty-first century but your head is still one hundred years in the past. These kinds of silly role playing fantasies just… aren't you."
"I did it!" Edward said indignantly. I smiled at how disgruntled he sounded.
"Yeah because Alice saw that you would."
"No," he shook his head. "Alice saw that it was possible that I would do it. She then saw that you would never tell me you wanted me to do it. When I saw that I decided that I'd make your fantasy come true, because I want to make all of your dreams come true, Bella. All of them, even the dirty ones."
That sobered me quite a bit. He sounded so serious and kind of hurt. I mean he couldn't, honestly blame me, could he? It wasn't as if he gave off the impression of a man who was open to role playing and bondage and spanking.
"Can you blame me, Edward?" I mumbled, suddenly feeling very nude. Not just physically but emotionally.
"How can we talk about sex fantasies when you won't even have sex in any interesting positions with me?"
"You've never said anything."
"Because you've never made it seem like I could. How the hell does vanilla sex let me think that you'd even be interested in hearing about any desires I have?"
"I don't even know what to say to that, Bella," he said. Edward got out of bed and started pulling on his clothes. "Actually I do." I looked over at him. "I don't know how many times I have to tell you that I would do anything for you, but I would. All you have to do is talk to me. Tell me what you want."
"You left me," I whispered. This had been festering for a while. It was time he heard it.
"All those years ago when you left me," Edward's face went blank, "you did so without saying one word to me. You felt without talking to me about the problem. You let me think it was my fault. And now that I know why you left I have to think that you just didn't respect me enough to talk to me about what you were afraid of. Sure you thought by doing that it would a clean break, but Edward you should have respected me enough to actually talk to me. How can you expect me to talk to you when you won't talk to me?" He opened his mouth to answer but I talked over him. "Honestly if it wasn't for Rosalie, Nessie wouldn't be here, because you didn't respect my decision to have her-"
"You could have died, Bella! You nearly did!" he shouted.
"But it was my decision, Edward! And that's not the point. The point is that you should have talked to me about it. We should have had a discussion but you made up your mind about what I should do. I can't talk to you because you never talk to me!"
Edward rubbed his hands all over his face. Something on his face told me that he knew I was right.
"We can work on it though, right?" I asked.
"Of course," he said, absentmindedly.
"And doing this is a step in the right direction."
"We're actually talking!" I exclaimed, trying to lighten the mood. Edward looked at me and shook his head.
"If I promise to listen do you promise to talk?"
"I can promise to try."
"I love you, Bella. Always and forever."
"And I love you, Edward. Prudish, one hundred year old, gentleman that you are."
He snorted and I laughed. And even though the night wasn't all good, it was heading in the right direction. Towards deeper respect and firmer trust and a reaffirmation of love. And if Professor Diggory taught me anything that night it was that I had to learn to trust Edward just as much he needed to learn to trust me.