I stood under a flame tree, watching as the clouds drifted by. My phone buzzed in my pocket.


"Bella. Where are you?" The anxious voice demanded.

"I'm outside Nessie's school. I went to pick her up." I replied.


"I don't want to talk about it, Edward."

"Bella, please." He pleaded. "I'll come get you."

"Don't bother. I'm fine." I said in a hard voice.

"No, you're not. I'm coming to get you." He insisted.

"Just let me spend some time with her okay?"

I snapped my phone shut. I wanted to shut out from the world. I wanted to be alone. I wanted my daughter with me.

From a distance, I heard the shrill ring of the school bell.

"Mummy!" A peal of bells rang. At that moment, I felt the need to cry.

I got up, and ran over to Renesmee, scooping her up into my arms.

"How was school today?" I asked, setting her down. She was just four months old, but had the body of a two year old.

"Good. I learnt a lot of things!" She chimed.

Her eyes met mine in an odd way.

"You're sad." She said. It wasn't a question.

I pushed back a lock of curl behind her ear. "Yes, Nessie. Mummy is very, very sad."

She though about that for awhile, then gave me a dazzling smile. "We'll go see Grandpa Charlie and bring him his apples!"

I smiled weakly. "Maybe another day..."

"No! We have to go today! I haven't seen him in a long time."

I looked at her. Her brown eyes were alert and bright, so much like my father's. "It's not possible, Nessie." I whispered. "Grandpa Charlie went on a vacation."

"Oh." She said simply.

I took her by her hand, and led her to sit beneath the flame tree.



"What do you think Grandpa Charlie is doing now?"

I listened to her sweet voice. It was like a lulluby, and my eyelids felt heavy all of a sudden. I did not know if I was tired, or if I wanted to cry.

"I suppose...he's having a good time...out there..." I replied, stretching my legs. She crawled onto my lap and curled herself into my chest.

"Which part of the globe did he go to?" She asked again.

I looked up at the sky. "Some place beautiful, I think. A place called Paradise."

"When is he coming back?"

This question seemed to pierce right through my heart. "I don't know..." I said quietly, to hide the sadness in my voice. "If he's enjoying himself, he may stay there for a very long time."

I heard her yawn, and cradled her against my chest. "Will I ever go there to visit him?" she asked sleepily.

I stroked her soft curls. "Yes, I suppose, you will one day..."

Renesmee was silent, sleeping. As the silence dragged, I reached out from my bag, and took out a brown leather book. It was clean, and there was not a stain on the cover. I flipped through the pages, gazing at the handwriting that once was so familiar to me. I started to read...

September 13, 1987

Dear friend,

Today is the best day of my life. My little girl was born at 1.08pm. She has her mother's hair and nose. They are mesmerizing in a way. The moment she was born, she squeezed my finger. And I knew that she belonged to me. This child will grow up to be a beautiful girl. There is no doubt in that, because she is my daughter. Isabella Marie Swan.


September 13, 1987

Dear friend,

My baby girl has turned one today! We had a big celebration for her. She couldn't stop smiling. Renee took a whole lot of pictures for little Bella's grandparents. I have been promoted, and Renee said that she's proud of me. I love her.


March 17, 1989

They have left me. She walked out of the house with my baby girl without a word.


December 25, 1999

Dear friend,

Bella came over to celebrate Christmas with me. She's all grown up now, and I'm glad to have her by my side. She's quiet, just like me, and not at all fussy. The guys will be chasing after her soon, I predict.


I stopped reading. There were thousands of entries in this diary. And I had only read four. I flipped to the last page - the last entry.


January 1, 2008

Dear friend,

I never know when my last entry will be. I don't think I can win this anymore. This fight is too hard. Eventually, I will lose.

I watched my Bella play with Renesmee today, and Edward watching her by the side. I know that my little girl will always be safe in his arms.

Carlisle brought me for a check-up. He told me that I had to undergo an urgent operation. But my chances of surviving are very low. I have decided to write this entry because I wouldn't know what will happen after the operation. If I should go, then I welcome death with open arms. But there is one thing I can never leave : my little Bella.

Bella was the only being that kept me going. I lived for her.


I swallowed the lump in my throat, and bit my lip to keep them from quivering. I turned to the back of the book.

If you should be reading this, never forget that there was a man named Charlie Swan, who lived his whole life as a policeman. And he was proud of it. The baby girl who was delivered on 13 September 1987 was his flame of hope.

I wore dark shades, and a black dress during the funeral. We were in a church, and Edward stood by my side, holding my hand. Jasper was at home with Rosalie and Renesmee. I stood outside, under a fir tree.

"Daddy, why are the branches of the tree hanging down like that?" I heard a little voice ask.

"Well, Josh, I guess God made them this way, so that there would be a variety of plants in different shapes and sizes." The father replied. "It's the same with humans. We're all made differently for a purpose."

"What's my purpose of being here on earth?" Little Josh asked again.

"Hmm...You will find out eventually. But for now, your one purpose is to grow up healthy, and strong. Just like the tree over there." He pointed to an oak tree across the courtyard.


"Yes, little fella?"

"When I grow up, I'll be a policeman like you, and save lots of people, and help people." I gazed at Josh's face. He was smiling, but didn't sound like he was joking.

His father grinned proudly. "That's my boy."

Edward's arms tightened around me. "The sun is coming out..." He whispered.

"Bring Charlie back." I pleaded as I turned to him. "Please bring Charlie back."

He pulled me into his chest and held me there. "Bella, Bella. Shh..."

The church was still empty. Charlie's relatives and friends had not arrived. I broke away from Edward and ran into the church, bursting through the doors. My cries echoed through the cold, empty hall.

"Bella!" Edward called after me, giving chase.

Charlie's body lay at the altar, and I slowed my pace. What was the point of crying, if there were no tears? I took three steps towards my father's body.

"Dad..." I whimpered. "Dad..."

With some miracle, I hoped, I really hoped, that Charlie would wake up. As the minutes passed, his eyes remained shut. Edward sighed, and touched my shoulder.

"Please...leave me." I sobbed. "Please..."

I could hear him moving out of the hall slowly, and finally, when the wooden doors shut, I collapsed onto the stone ground beneath. I wailed, and wrapped my arms around my legs. The pain in my heart was almost umbearable. I felt like I had to die, and there was no other way out. A wooden cross was placed before Charlie's body, and I reached out to touch it. It was warm, and it calmed the rage in my body. But my sobbings never ceased.

"My child..." A gentle, frail voice came.

I turned around, and the preacher whom Charlie had known for many years walked towards me. Everybody called him Father Peter. At that point, I was oblivious to the scent of his blood. I just watched him as he approached, wearing a cross around his neck, and holding on to a bible. His silver-white hair gleamed under the light through the windows. I was kneeling down, and he sat by the bench.

"Dear child..." He sighed. "It must be so painful for you to have lost your father."

I sobbed harder and louder, but tears never came down. It didn't matter to me if he knew my true identity. I just needed assurance, and comfort.

"Bella, I've known your father for thirty years. When he was young, his father died, and his mother brought him to Forks. He spend his days in this church, under my care. I know him better than anybody. Even Renee."

I clutched my dress. "Please...I don't want my father to leave me..." I begged.

Father Peter placed a hand on my head gently - an act to soothe. "Child, your father is not leaving you forever. You will meet him again someday."

It was impossible. I would live forever, I wouldn't die. The thought of being apart from my father for eternity caused my heart to clench.

"I will not say 'do not cry'." He said gently. "Weep, child. For it is natural to weep and mourn for the loss of a loved one. But never forget that he will always live in you."

I rocked back and forth on my knees, strangled chokes escaping through my mouth. For a moment, the hall was silent. And then, Father Peter began to sing.

There's a land that is fairer than day,
And by faith we can see it afar;
For the Father waits over the way
To prepare us a dwelling place there.

In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore;
In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore.

We shall sing on that beautiful shore
The melodious songs of the blessed;
And our spirits shall sorrow no more,
Not a sigh for the blessing of rest.

To our bountiful Father above,
We will offer our tribute of praise
For the glorious gift of His love
And the blessings that hallow our days.

In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore;
In the sweet by and by,
We shall meet on that beautiful shore

My weepings drowned his voice, and every word that he sang caused a new grief in me. The tune of this song was just priceless. It was my favourite song when I was young. And I haven't sang it in a long time.

I read the words on Charlie's coffin slowly, crying as I did. "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept my faith."

A trickle of tear slid down Father Peter's cheek. "Bella, your father was, and still is a good man. He wanted these words to be carved onto his coffin. I want you know to that, no matter what you do, he will always be proud of you."

I screamed, letting all my woes out. Charlie had always told me never to scream in church. But this time, I broke his rule. Father Peter watched me with sunken eyes, another tear rolling down.

"Go back home, child, and weep. You do not have to stay here for the funeral and service." He touched my shoulder briefly, and retreated back to the prayer room.

I walked back home in a daze, ignoring the whistles of young men by the streets. Everything was dark under the sunglasses that I was wearing. Rosalie was standing just outside the front door. When she saw me, her golden eyes were filled with pity.

"Bella..." She whispered as she hugged me. "It's okay. He's no longer suffering."

She let me go, and touched my cheeks. "Tomorrow, I will go with you on his last journey."

My lips quivered, and my shoulders shook. I covered my face with my hands as grief washed through me again.

"Oh, Bella." Rosalie hugged me again. "Bella, I'm so sorry. He loved you, you know..."

"What should I do?" I wailed softly, praying that Renesmee wouldn't hear me. "He's gone."

"No, no. He's not gone. Yes, his physical form is gone, but his spirit will remain." She assured me.

She held me for some time, before saying, "Come, I'll take you back to your home. We'll stay there for the night."

She took my hand, and we waded through the forest, until we reached Charlie's house. I went straight up to Charlie's bedroom, and lay on his bed. I could hear Rosalie's conversation with Emmett over the phone.

"How is she? Edward is worried." Emmett asked.

"I'm trying to comfort her. I've brought the notes along." Rosalie answered.

"She must be feeling horrible."

"I know. She's devastated. I'll bring her to the church tomorrow. I've spoken to Father Peter, and it will just be Bella and I."

There was a pause.

"Thank you, my dear." Emmett said. "For what you are doing. I'm sure Edward will be relieved that you're looking after Bella."

"She's my sister. I'll take care of her."

"Okay. I'll talk to you again, Rose."

"Bye. I love you."

"I love you too, honey."

I closed my eyes, and felt Rosalie sitting by my feet. "Bella?"


"Our family has written some notes to you."

I sat up, and she handed a few pieces of paper to me. "We didn't want to crowd around you at one go. You need space." She said.


I can imagine how horrible you must be feeling now. I know you won't be attending the funeral. Bells, Charlie was never unhappy when you were around. Your presence filled his life with joy and excitement. He loved you more than anyone else. Remember: As much as you love Nessie, he loves you. Maybe more than that.




I'm sorry for your loss. I don't really know what to say. I apologise for not being close enough to comfort you. But, I do hope that this note will warm you up, because I have sealed my brotherly love, and a wave of calmness into it.

I love you, my sister.




Charlie is happy. Now and forever.


I left the rest of the other's notes on the table, and closed my eyes again.

I received the cool, marble jar in a daze. Father Peter stood behind me, along with Rosalie.

We were on the cliff at La Push beach. I still remember how the icy waters hit me when I had jumped down a few years ago. I rubbed the jar absently.

"Dad, it's your last journey now." I whispered. "I'll always remember you."

I took off the lid of the jar, and gazed into it. Thousands of grey ashes lay inside. That's my father. The gloves around my hand trembled as I scooped the ashes up. I reached forward, and slowly, released the ashes into the air, as the wind blew. I began to sob again. My heart ached, as I took in the sight of the tiny ashes leaving my hands. Slowly, my father was beginning to fade.

Every time the wind blew the ashes further away from me, my heart would cry. The tearless, broken sobs that escaped through my lips did nothing to save them. Just three scoops of my hand, and the jar was empty.

I looked into the jar, and found nothing left. My shoulders began to tremble violently as I cried. Rosalie put an arm around me.

He was gone. The last traces of my father was gone.

"Goodbye, Charlie." Rosalie said quietly as she gazed into the waters below.

"Dad, I love you very much." I choked. "I love you very much!"

My father's ashes were scattered among the blue waters beneath. Some were carried with the wind to another place far away. But, he will always remain in my heart.

A/N: Hello dear readers, I really hoped you enjoyed this story. I created this in memory of my grandfather, who passed away in March this year.