Author's Notes

I'm not a huge fan of lengthy author's notes in fan fiction, but in this case I feel that some early clarifications are necessary, as I've diverged here and there from canon in some ways I'd like to explain, to avoid a flurry of questions about why I might have done that.

Ownership: I don't own Katekyo Hitman Reborn!, and never will. So this is all done for my own fun and entertainment.

Title: The title of this story, "Vivi memor leti" translates to "I live remembering death". It refers specifically to Tsuna's memories of the events in the future. Chapters and future additional story arcs will be titled in a similar way. Latin is good for the soul.

Ratings and pairings: This is an NC-17 story. There is sex. Specifically it contains yaoi, yuri, and heterosexual interactions between a variety of characters. There is a lot of it. Be prepared. If you don't like it, don't read it.

More specifically, the primary relationship focus through this story and its following story arcs is Reborn/Tsuna (R27). However, Tsuna has physical and emotional relationships with a lot of people in this set of stories, and other people have interactions with each other as well. You'll see pretty much every Guardian (including Chrome) in some way with Tsuna at some point in time. You'll see Xanxus and Tsuna as well. Again, if you don't like that idea, don't read it.

Timeline: This is set a little over two years after the Ten Years Later story arc in the manga and anime. Tsuna and most of his friends are sixteen or seventeen now, depending on the range of ages starting out. Lambo and I-pin are nine years old and Futa is just barely thirteen. The two younger kids are in primary school and Futa is in middle school. The older teens have moved up to high school.

Back Story: The initial premise of this story is that when the Ten Years Later arc ended and they returned to their own time, their memories were altered. So they simply believe that they'd been at one of Reborn's training camps and that's where the box weapons and additional skills have come from. The girls' memories are altered to have been cooking and providing cheering and so on for the training. This is done to prevent them from doing anything rash in an attempt to change the future.

Unfortunately, Tsuna's Sky ring retains the memories and emotions of the events in the future and he starts having nightmares of those events that haunt him for the next two years. As a result of those dreams, he's started changing his relationships with the people around him. Over time his desperation to avoid losing the people he cares about starts changing him as well.

Relevant Notations: This was written after episode 158 aired and after chapter 251 in the manga. So anything happening in canon past those points might not appear or apply in this story. This is to avoid any attempts by me to go in and backfill facts, which I am very likely to do as I watch or read new canon materials. I have to cut myself off at some point and understand that things will become AU after that point.

Which brings me to the next note. This story is AU. I am changing the story away from the canon deliberately in many places to work on the portrayal of how Tsuna would or will evolve after these events as a person and a leader, and how it affects his relationships with the people around him. Not to mention all the sex.

Textual/Content Notations: I've diverged from the current canon in several ways. First of all, you'll see in the story that Tsuna refers to most of his Guardians by first name now. After almost four years together, I believe this would be the case. He refers to Hibari as Hibari out of respect (although that will change over time), and the future Hibari as Hibari-san out of a deeper sense of self-preservation. The children have all taken to calling Tsuna "Tsuna-nii".

I've retained the common Japanese naming structure, in that introductions for Japanese characters is last name, first name. For characters of other nationalities, it is first name, last name. I've also retained Japanese suffixes where I feel they are appropriate. In regards to the naming of various Vongola leaders, I'm sticking with the Italian structure (Primo, Decimo, etc.), rather than incorporating too many Japanese words.

In addition, I'm using the word "family" in two different contexts and so I will do my best to be consistent about differentiating between them using capital and non-capital letters. "Family" refers to a mafia Family, and "family" refers to what most people would consider a normal family unit. So when Tsuna refers to a person being "family" and "Family", it means that he considers them to be a part of both parts of his life.

Feedback and Length: Lastly, this is a long story. It's sitting at over 40,000 finished words as I start posting it, and will continue to grow. There are notations and story plans laid out for dozens more chapters and following story arcs as well.

Feedback and comments are always appreciated, constructive as well as opinions. Character attacks and inflammatory comments, however, will be deleted. No one needs to see people bashing the things that they care about, most especially in regards to sexuality, communication and feelings.

Prologue: Ab initio (Namimori / Japan / Ten Years in the Future)

The timeline of his life probably resembled abstract art more than it would a steady progression of dates, events and experiences, Tsuna thought, eyes wandering over the people surrounding him. Especially the past few months, with jumps forward and backward in time, all just to correct problems that by now Tsuna had realized were at least partially caused by his own unwillingness to provide his mafia Family with what they needed from him. It tore him apart, his mind constantly reciting a litany of bad choices that had lead to the rise of the Millefiore and the near-downfall of the Vongola, realizing how his own weaknesses has hurt so many people that he loved so much.

As his Family gathered around him, finally victorious but not without cost, Tsuna ignored Shouichi's statements about how during their return to the past, their memories would be altered to avoid any sort of time/space paradox. He wanted to forget all of this and return to the innocent boy he'd been before. Sure, the skills he'd learned made him stronger, but he wanted to wipe the violence, the anger, the disgust from his mind. Tsuna desperately wanted that clean slate and allow him to forgive himself.

Tsuna's inner turmoil was very likely the reason he didn't notice the quiet flames flaring from his Vongola ring as the process began. Some part of him realized that something was off as his mind blurred during the transition, but not enough to panic him. It had to be part of the return to their time, which was odd enough as it was.

What he wouldn't realize for close to two years after the events of the past months spent in the future was that the Sky ring of the Vongola forgot nothing. He should have remembered standing before his predecessors whose sins were catalogued before his very eyes as he was tried and tested by them. It would start slowly, but within months of their return, the dreams of the future started. At first they came once a week, maybe twice. By the time Tsuna started high school with his friends, they were a nightly occurrence.

It took him much less time to realize that the nightmares that shook him awake in the middle of the night were influencing him directly. Tsuna found himself bringing new people into the Family whose faces echoed those he saw in his dreams; people something inside Tsuna demanded that he save. The fear in his dreams sharpened his mind over time and he found himself making more and more decisions for himself as well. His days of begging Reborn to decide things for him passed quickly, after that.

By the time Tsuna celebrated his sixteenth birthday, surrounded by Family and friends, he'd finally caught on to some of what was happening, and he'd started to plan. The nightmares were merciless, and more than any training Reborn put him through, the images Tsuna saw roused his Vongola blood and began to force changes in him. He did his best not to worry the people around him and instead focused on small changes and small actions, working slowly to do everything he could to prevent those horrible dreams from coming true.

Tsuna never again wanted to hear that Reborn had died, along with his fellow Arcobaleno. He never wanted to watch Takeshi mourn his father, simply because he'd chosen to befriend Tsuna when they were so young. The idea of the brilliance of some of his newer friends being turned towards murder and destruction practically enraged him. The thought of losing a single one of them was devastating.

In those two years following the trip to the future that his Family remembered solely as some extreme training session of Reborn's, in which they gained new weapons and skills, Tsuna slowly came into his own. Rather than fighting his destiny, he learned. The realization that the only way he could protect the people he loved was to fight for them drove him mercilessly.

His actions, when taken, were subtle but sharp. Tsuna learned to listen to Reborn, even more so than he had in the past. As the bond between them deepened and strengthened, it wasn't only the Arcobaleno who noticed their connection. Throughout the mafia underworld, rumors spread about the young Vongola Decimo and his tutor, the most dangerous hitman alive.

All of this, however, Tsuna did his best to hide from his Family for now. They deserved their innocence and their childhood. Never again would he willingly put his own needs and wants before theirs. Not if the results were the scenes that played in his head, over and over, night after night.

The only peace Tsuna found in his sleep was when some change he made, or action he took, seemed to be the right one. Then, one of the nightmares would vanish, never repeating itself again. It was his hope that before it was too late, he could eliminate all of them.

*Title translates to "In the beginning".