Hey… I understand you are probably eternally angry at me for not updating in forever, but school has really kept me down. Chad's been pretty busy, too. But I'll let him talk to you all. (PS: Thanks for getting this story so many reviews, love you all!)
Chad Dylan Cooper's Advice Column
Written by: the one, the only, Chad Dylan Cooper
Wazzup my fans? Lemme hear you say heyyy! Alright, now that we have that introduction out of the way, I don't really have an explanation for why I haven't been updating this thing, except that I'm very busy… and tired. Mackenzie Falls has been working overtime lately since the Fall TV season just started, which means I have to work 8 hours a day instead of 5. This results in me not getting the beauty rest I rightfully deserve, and having less time to spend with m'lady. Lately, I've been sort of hiding from her though, (not that I'm afraid or anything…) because Sonny has been having this weird attachment to Halloween costume shopping. Every day or so she'll come and show me these awkward two-people outfits that are just 'so cute' or 'adorable'. If I wanted to be any of those things, I would just go as myself. ;) The one she has her heart set on is a Salt and Pepper combination costume. I cringe just imagining what the paparazzi would do; besides have a good laugh along with whoever else sees us. Anyway, I am going to answer your questions quick before I take a nap and then resume shooting. You all are lucky; if it wasn't for the cup of coffee I had before, you wouldn't be getting an update out of me…
Why does Sterling Knight look just like you?
Who? Oh, right, that wannabe who stole my look. No worries, that freak could never pull off being CDC.
Did you know that Nico and Grady drew on the billboard you made for Sonny?
Whatever; those two idiots along with the other Randoms had to pay for our dinner that night. And we had sushi. Sushi doesn't come cheap. :)
What's yours and Sonny's favorite movie?
I'll give you a hint: I directed it, produced it and starred in it. Oh, wait, that could easily be anything because I'm just that good.
What would you do if Sonny got kidnapped?
Call the cops and rescue m'lady.
Have you ever dated a cheerleader?
I probably did. I've dated so many girls that it has all just become a blur.
Do you watch Glee?
An overrated show about a group of stereotypical kids who sing show tunes? To me, it's the teen version of a Kidz Bop CD.
If Sonny said that she would break up with you if you didn't watch So Random, would you watch it?
Sonny would never want to put me through that much horror.
Could you send me a lock of your hair?
I'll tell you what: why don't you stick to making out with the posters of me in your room instead?
Was Sonny mad after your first date bombed?
I don't have to explain anything to you… people.
Are new episodes of the Falls coming out soon? Spoilers?
You'll just have to tune in and see Mackenzie face off against Trevor when he goes off and dates Chloe on his night. But, hey, you'll just have to watch like everyone else.
Did you know I think you have the cutest smile lines?
When you kiss Sonny, what do you think it will be like?
Who says I haven't kissed Sonny yet? ;)
If things keep going the way they do between you two, do you think you will propose to her in a few years?
P-propose? I mean, come on, we've only been dating for a little bit now…
Will you read my story?
Random fan, I'm not sure if you knew this or not, so I am going to tell you calmly and rationally: I. Don't. Read.
Who's your best guy friend?
Zac Efron…. HA! …Oh no, I'm so tired I'm starting to become delirious!
Do you like David Guetta?
Who the Chad is that?
Do you like wearing gloves?
Do you like hot-air ballooning?
Anything that will either injury me and/or mess up my amazing hair, I don't do.
Is it true that you took a magazine quiz to see if you were the "Right Type for Sonny Munroe" before you began dating?
What's your favorite So Random sketch?
Easy. The Hot EMT one.
Do you think Demi Lovato is a good singer?
As good a singer as anyone on Disney Channel can be, I guess.
What was the weirdest fan encounter you have ever had?
Too many to count.
Are you nominated for Teen Choice awards?
Do you seriously have to ask me that question?
Do you like Justin Bieber?
Don't even get me started on this kid. Let's see… he can't sing even with the most expensive auto-tuning machine in the world to back him up, his hair makes him look like a girl, and he's just an overall loser. Good enough answer for you?
Describe Sonny in one word.
If Sonny and Tawni were on the 10th floor of a building that was on fire, which one would you save?
You are really going to ask me that? Easily, I would save Sonny and let Blondie save herself.
When did you start liking Sonny?
That's for me to know and for you to never find out.
Why did you cut your beautiful hair?
Well- GASP! Wait, are you implying that just because my hair is shorter it is no longer beautiful?
Do you like Hawaii?
They have good punch.
THEN WHY IS SHE KISSING HIM?
I was right; caps lock is only something responsible people should be aloud to use.
What is the secret behind your awesomeness?
What a question. Too bad the answer is only in my mind, which is what makes me so great and unique.
What did you do with the money from your walk-a-thon against books?
I told my assistant, Mark, to take care of it since I came down with SPS. I'm sorry, but my personal health is wayyyy more important than helping the children.
I am watching you right now.
If Sonny wanted to go see Eclipse, would you take her?
No. I would literally die of boredom. Like Avatar, if she wants to see it, she can go without me.
Would you rather read Twilight or Harry Potter?
-_- Let me break this down really simply: me = no books.
Why don't you admit to watching So Random?
Why would I admit something that isn't true?
Don't you think you annoy Sonny when you admire yourself?
She got used to it the day she met me.
Do you like cheese?
What's your favorite Girl Scout cookie?
I like the Do-Si-Dos.
If you had a cookie with your face on it, would you find it creepy to watch someone eat it?
If I'm watching some random person eat a cookie, there is obviously something wrong with the world that day.
CDC also stands for Center for Disease Control. How do you feel having your initials associated with diseases?
No. The CDC is for disease control and prevention. Get your facts right before you try to one-up Chad Dylan Cooper.
WHAT DOES YOUR HAIR TASTE LIKE?
Once again: caps lock can do wonders when used in moderation.
Why haven't you and Sonny kissed?
Like I told the other fan: who says we haven't?
Does this absence of kissing bother you?
Is it because Sonny is kissing someone else?
No, that's not the reason.
If you don't watch So Random, then how did you know they were doing the Mackenzie Stalls sketch?
If you could eat Gummy Bear pancakes, would you?
Would you ever grow a mustache?
How do you feel about Chawni?
Blondie and me? *shivers*
What about Chugar?
What is that? It sounds like a disease.
Would you rather have the pear phone, apple phone, or banana phone?
None. I have an iPad.
Are you related to Christopher Wilde and Sterling Knight?
How do you feel about Sonny dying her hair black?
It's cute and really shiny.
I live under your bed.
I named my mom Chad.
I suggest looking into cheap counselors for your insanity.
Instead of calling Sonny m'lady or Sonshine, why not just call her by her name? She seems to respect you when you do.
Because I believe that when in a relationship, you should be able to have your own names for each other (hence Sonny's nicknames).
There's a huge oil spill, can you come and save us?
I'll let BP handle that.
If you couldn't be an actor, what would you be?
A performer. ;) (I love loopholes).
Sonny or your hair?
GASP! How dare you make me decide!
Do you still have that Harry the Hotdog costume?
It wasn't mine, it was the Randoms'. Do you honestly think I would own something like that?
Have you ever watched any fan shipping videos starring you and Sonny?
No, I don't have time.
There you go; I hope everyone is satisfied. But, I mean, CDC just answered your questions, of course you would be fully satisfied! Now, I'm going to go get some rest before having to work some more. Goodnight.
Peace out suckas,
Chad Dylan Cooper
Alright, I finally got this update out and now I don't feel so guilty about leaving you all waiting. :) Thanks for the questions once again! Who is smart and can tell what clues Chad left in here about his and Sonny's relationship? Hint. Hint.