Hello everyone :) Yeah, I know, I know... It's been ages since I last updated the fic 'Second chance to happiness' but I have a major block and I don't know how to continue it. I know what's going to happen in later chapters but I have to find out what to write in between. I haven't abandoned it, I will finish it but I can't say for sure when that time will be. I'm trying to work on it.
This is a new story that popped into my head when I watched the last scene of House and Cameron together in the episode TeamWork. It's the only scene I've seen from season 6 and I haven't watched the 5th season yet so I don't really know the details of what's going on in the show. I just watched that one scene and I had to write something. So now I can pretend that this happened instead :p I don't know if this is going to stay a oneshot. If I decide to continue it will happen after I finish the other story...
I hope you'll enjoy reading this and that things will get better in the future for our ship... Thank you for reading :)
Disclaimer: I don't own House M.D.... the lyrics are from the song 'Never say never' byt the Fray
There's some things we don't talk about
rather do without
and just hold the smile
falling in and out of love
ashamed and proud of
together all the while
You can never say never
why we don't know when
time and time again
younger now than we were before
don't let me go...
don't let me go...
don't let me go...
Your eyes are locked on hers but you are aware of her outstretched hand. You don't make a move to grab it. It's like déjà vu, she stands in front of you saying goodbye and you do nothing.
The only difference is that this time you know she is not coming back. If you don't move this time she will leave for good and nothing you do after is going to keep her here.
You contemplate what is going to hurt the most. Take her hand and watch her walk away or stay unmoving and watch her walk away from your life once again pretending that this isn't goodbye? Is there a third option?
She knows that you are not going to take her hand although she hoped that this time it was going to be different. She lowers her hand and moves closer to you. You can feel heat radiating from her body and shipping into yours. And suddenly you feel her lips burning on your stubbled cheek.
You can almost taste the life that you could have if you had given in to her. You can almost see every moment of that life passing in front of your eyes. You fight very hard not to close your eyes to get a better glimpse of the life that could have been yours.
Her lips linger on your cheek but you stay unmoving. You feel her hot breath as she pulls away from you. You see her eyes as she looks at you for one last time and then she turns around and walks out of your office, out of your life…
It's probably the only time you can't decipher the emotions in her expressive green-blue eyes. What happened to the woman you hired? Oh, yeah… You managed to break her to pieces. It was what you were trying to do from the beginning, right?
Right… but this is not the whole truth. When she walked through that door for the first time you knew you were going to have a hard time staying away from her. She was the most beautiful woman you had ever seen and you knew it was going to be a challenge to stay away. She was everything you weren't. Optimistic, hopeful, she cared for everything and everyone, she had an insane moral compass and you were sure that she was going to try and fix you.
You wanted to make her see what real life was like, you wanted to make her understand that she was too naïve for her own good, you wanted to make her understand that life and love hurt.
Maybe you were wrong though… maybe that's why you managed to break her to pieces. Maybe she knew that life and love hurt better than anyone else.
You watch her walk out of your office for maybe the last time and you want to do something, stop her, talk to her, just do something!
You grab your cane that was resting against your desk and you walk after her but when you reach the door you stop. Maybe this is a bad idea, maybe you can't do it… The only woman that could actually make you happy is walking away this should mean something. You can do something, you just have to…
"Cameron!" you call after her and she slows down until she stops completely.
"What do you want House?" she asks but she doesn't turn to look at you.
Come on, turn around… You think that if she actually sees that you went after her she is going to stop and listen to you. That is if you actually pluck up the courage to talk to her.
"Are you going to stay there? We can't talk like that." You say and she finally turns around.
You can see she is a little surprised and she sees you standing by the door.
"We have nothing to say." She reasons but you shake your head.
"You came to me which means that you have something to say." You reply and it's her time to shake her head.
"I told you everything I had to say…" she says in a low tone.
"Come on Allison…" Sure, manipulative using her first name, you know it. But it was the only way to get her attention.
She sighs and you can actually see her resistance crumbling. She stays unmoving for some seconds and then she starts walking towards you. You let out a breath you didn't know you were holding. Great, now you just have to find something to say…
You move aside and she walks into your office. She seems cautious, guarded.
"Want a drink?" you ask as you walk to your desk and you take the bottle of bourbon in your hands.
She nods slightly and you pour two glasses. You hand her the one and you take the other. She takes a big gulp and she leans against the wall next to your desk.
"Please unclench…" you say to her and you proceed to draw all the blinds closed.
"What are you doing?" she asks cautiously making you roll your eyes.
"Nurses talk. They talk a lot." You say in an exasperated tone but she doesn't react.
"What do you want?" she asks and you shrug.
"I haven't thought about it yet." You say honestly, catching her off guard.
"So this isn't just you being your usual self?" she asks with a frown.
"Is it so hard to believe?" you inquire trying to sound nonchalant.
"Yes. I believe that you just want to do this your way. You have to say the final word; you want to make this as hard for me as possible. Am I wrong?" her tone is steady and surprises you.
"I don't know yet…" you mumble, averting your gaze.
She places her glass on your desk and she moves closer to you. You want to back away but you are also curious to see how far she is willing to go. And if she goes too far are you willing to follow?
"Can you, for one time in your life, be honest?" she whispers and if she wasn't so close you wouldn't have heard her.
"If you are going to pick me apart you can leave." You state nodding towards the door.
"You are the one who called me back in here." She replies with a shrug and you groan.
"I'm an idiot…" you mumble mostly to yourself.
"You are a genius." She contradicts "And an idiot…" she adds as an afterthought.
You actually smile at that but you hide it quickly. You drain your glass and you place it on the desk next to hers.
"Why did you call me back in here? You wanted to humiliate me some more or did you want to pick me apart? Find at last what makes me tick, find why I loved you, find why I…"
She doesn't get to finish her sentence because your lips are on hers swallowing everything she wants to say to you.
She struggles at first, her fists collide painfully with your chest, she is trying to get away but your hands encircle her wrists and you don't let her go. You have her backed up against a wall, trapped with your body.
And suddenly she stops fighting you and she is kissing you back and, God, it's everything you dreamt of and more. She is addictive, like your Vicodin but so much better.
You free her wrists and she immediately laces her fingers around your neck, bringing you impossibly closer to her. Her moan makes shivers run down your spine and you want her out of clothes and underneath you now.
Your arms find their way around her waist and your hands travel under the black top she is wearing. The moment you feel her warm skin against your finger tips you area a goner. You always dreamt her skin would be smooth but this is so much better than your dreams.
"Why now?" she asks breathlessly against your lips and you capture them again.
"You are leaving…" you mumble. Your eyes close and you rest your forehead against hers.
"So?" she asks, breathing heavily. You feel her hot breath against your lips and you find it hard to think.
You think you have the right answer but… now you are not sure. Are you kissing her because she is leaving and you won't have to make a commitment after that or are you kissing her because you are trying to make her stay?
You don't know what to answer so you just kiss her again and this time she doesn't resist you, she gives into you completely.
You think she is a little crazy for letting you but so are you. You kiss her like there is no tomorrow, your lips are urgent against hers and she melts into you giving you whatever she has to give.
Her hands move from your neck to your chest and they slip inside your jacket. She tries to take it off of you and you help along. She does a quick job on the buttons of your shirt and soon your torso is bare and she runs her hands over your naked chest making you moan against her mouth.
The feeling is great but she is way too overdressed for your liking. You want to feel her naked body against yours, learn every inch of her glorious body by heart. You grab her top and you pull it over her head. Your hands run up and down her sides making her shiver.
You reach the waistband of her jeans and you unbutton them. Your hands slip inside and you rest them on her hips without taking her pants off as you continue kissing. You want to see if she is going to stop you but she reaches for your belt buckle and you know the answer.
Her pants fall to the floor and she steps out of them, she kicks her high hills off and she stands there, in front of you only in her panties and bra.
God she is breathtaking… she is a goddess, an angel. You feel like your heart is going to stop beating. You feel like you are going to explode. How can she be so beautiful?
You feel her hands making quick work of your zipper and you help her take your pants off. Her hands rest on your hips momentarily and then you feel her left hand travelling to your thigh.
You are ready to protest when you see her glare and you stay silent. You feel her hand on your damaged thigh and you close your eyes. Her touch is so soft and gentle that you feel your eyes water. You don't dare to open your eyes and suddenly you feel her lips, kissing your scar. You really don't know how to feel...
She is up again and you feel her hot breath on your lips. Your boxers are gone along the way.
"I never wanted to fix you…" she whispers before claiming your lips with hers in a searing kiss. Her body presses against yours and you can feel that she is wearing nothing on. Her lips are urgent; there is so much emotion that it almost scares you. Almost…
You respond with the same amount of passion, holding her to you, not wanting to let her go. You walk, dragging her with you and you move to the couch where you fall on top of her. She is trapped between your body and the couch but she doesn't seem to mind. Her lips are on yours, her hands run up and down your back and her legs wrap around your body. God she is glorious, you never want to this to end…
You don't want to wait any longer, you can't wait any longer.
"Open your eyes…" she mumbles against your lips and you comply. You don't know why but right now you can't say no to her.
Her eyes are magnificent, you can't help but drown in them.
"We are doing this once, might as well do it right." She whispers before capturing your lips with hers in the gentlest kiss you have ever received.
You had enough of waiting so you slip inside her making both of you moan. Your eyes are locked together as you start moving and you find that you can't look away.
"Why?" she asks and you see that her eyes are glassy.
"Why what?" you ask breathlessly.
"Why are you doing this now? You didn't want me to die without knowing the feeling?" she asks and your own words hit you back in the face.
"No… I didn't want to die without knowing the feeling…" you whisper your truth.
A tear runs down her cheek and you kiss it away. Your lips find hers once again as you rock together. You want to hear her moan, you want to hear her beg you for release, you want to reach your release holding her in your arms.
You feel her nails digging in your back and you know there are going to be marks tomorrow but you don't care. Her eyes are captivating and you know that if you don't look away you are going to be in trouble later so you break the eye contact and you start placing open mouthed kisses from her neck to her collarbone.
She is intoxicating, you don't know why you kept rejecting her all those years but now you don't want to let go. If heaven exists this is definitely it…
She moans as you change the angle slightly and spurs you on further. She can't leave after this, can she?
Your palms caress the velvety skin of her thighs. You rest one of her knees on your chest allowing you to go as deep as you know. She gasps and you claim her lips with yours. She meets each and every one of your thrusts. You leave a trail of kisses on her hot skin, her eyes close and she whispers your name, your first name, and it's almost too much to handle.
You kiss her breasts, your stubble grazes her nipples and her moans get louder by the minute. You are ready to burst and you know it. She is driving you insane and although this feels too good to end you don't know how longer you are going to last.
"Greg please…" there it is, your first name again. You can't say no to her, not now.
Your hand travels between your bodies and the moment you touch her she screams out. You feel her clenching around you and you burry your head in the crook of her neck. Your hand continues its movements and it doesn't take her long to climax, clenching violently around you. You thrust hard inside her, trying to find your own release.
"God Greg…" she says breathlessly, the waves of her orgasm still strong.
"Jesus…" you mumble as you feel her clenching around you again and you can't keep this up any longer. You give into her completely, emptying inside her with her given name on your lips.
You burry your face in her neck inhaling her scent, wanting to memorize it, wanting to remember everything of this…
Her lips kiss your shoulder softly and her hands move up and down your back soothingly. You feel her hands on your neck and then caressing your hair.
"I liked your hair longer…" she mumbles and you just nuzzle her neck.
"You are still leaving right?" you ask and she can actually hear the sadness in your voice this time.
"This isn't like last time…" she admits and you nod.
"Then why give in to me now?" you question and you pull back in order to look into her eyes.
"Maybe I didn't want to die without knowing the feeling either." She says with a small smile.
You give her a nod and a sigh escapes your lips. So this is it, this is how it ends… You pull off of her and you reach for your boxers and jeans. You get dressed, leaving only your jacket on the chair behind your desk.
She puts her clothes on too and after watching her cover that glorious body of hers you sit on your recliner.
"Want another bourbon?" you ask, trying to relieve the tension but she shakes her head.
"I need to go…" she replies, the sadness evident in her eyes.
She moves closer to you and she leans down. Her lips graze yours so softly that for a moment you think they aren't there. You deepen the kiss but a few moments later she pulls back. Her forehead rests against yours for a while and you feel her breath on your lips.
"Goodbye… Greg…" she whispers and you feel your stomach clench but you have to let her go. You can at least give her that one.
"Goodbye Allison…" you whisper too and you close your eyes.
You feel her lips on your forehead for a moment and then she is gone, walking out of your office and out of your life.
Maybe it's for the best. Maybe…
You open your eyes and you watch her walk away gracefully. You wonder if you are going to see her again. You hope you will. And maybe next time you will be ready for each other. Maybe…