Special thanks to ECullenitis for looking this over for me!
A/N: These characters and all other copyrighted elements are property of Stephenie Meyer. She would probably be embarrassed if she read this. This is a VERY AU take on things around the Eclipse era. I have taken some liberties with (i.e. disregarded) the timeline & characterizations, so just deal with it. There will be femme slash. You have been warned.
"He's killing me, Alice. Killing me," Bella moaned.
"Honestly, Bella. I know much you love my brother, but there is some crazy stuff going on right now. I'm not sure that pushing the physical boundaries of your relationship is his first priority. He's worried sick about protecting you from whatever is happening in Seattle and finding out why your clothes went missing."
Bella sighed. "Isn't that all the more reason to experience these things together? I could die! A virgin!"
"You're not going to die," I said, rolling my eyes. It was hard to remember sometimes that she was still just a child, even if the two of us looked the same age.
She moved closer to me on Edward's black leather sofa, resting her head on my shoulder. "I can't help the way I feel. It's this intoxicating combination of how much I love him, how beautiful he is, and the way my body reacts when we're close."
"Bella," I began slowly. "Do you even have any idea what to do when you get there?"
That was how we got here – Bella straddling my lap in her living room, one hand placed firmly between my legs.
"Porn? You want me to watch porn?" she whisper-shrieked incredulously. "Oh my god, your whole family probably just heard that!" She had shifted across the sofa and was now hiding behind a throw pillow.
"First of all, Emmett, Jasper, and Edward are on a hunting trip. Carlisle is at work, Esme is touring restoration homes in Vancouver with Carmen, and Rosalie is down in the garage working on the BMW. If she heard anything, I highly doubt she'll care."
"I…I…uh, I don't know about this, Alice."
"You're going to say yes anyway," I told her. When she tried to protest, I tapped my temple with a single finger. "So how about a trip to Port Angeles?"
"I'm staying in the car," she grumbled.
I laughed and dragged her down to the garage.
A few hours later, Bella was fed, I had purchased several videos, and we were back at the house in my bedroom. We sat on my bed, where she proceeded to nervously pick at her fingernails while simultaneously chewing a hole through her lip.
"Enough already, Bella," I chastised her. "You're not having major surgery, we're watching a video."
She only stuttered in response.
As I opened one of the selections and placed it in the DVD player, I began to explain things to her. "There's a big variety in pornography. Some is a bit more…graphic. I tried to choose things that were pretty straightforward. No fetishes or weird themes, but you'll see everything. Do you understand that?"
She gulped and nodded slightly.
"You'll see things from some angles you never have before, so just consider it a lesson in anatomy and mating rituals."
We didn't say anything else as the video began. Bella's eyes were wide, and I noticed her cringe or bury her face several times. There was really no plot to the video, of course, so it didn't take long to get to the parts I wanted Bella to see.
Although she tried to remain still and quiet, I could see the way the images were affecting her. She was very uncomfortable for a while, but obviously interested, based on the attention she gave to the television screen. I could smell the hint of perspiration budding on her body. At first it was due to her nerves. When it started coming from different places on her body, I knew that the movie was causing some different reactions. This was followed closely by another distinct smell from her lower half, and that was when I knew this little venture would be a success.
Just before the movie ended, a brief vision clouded my mind. I smiled to myself and bit back a childish giggle.
"Umm, that was very…informative," Bella said hesitantly. "I'm sort of tired, so I think I'll go upstairs for bed."
"Okay," I agreed without question.
Bella was not tired, and she certainly wasn't going to sleep.
She was going to do a little practical application.
Neither Bella nor I mentioned the video the next day, but when we settled down that night after she had dinner, I decided to open the floor for discussion.
"So what did you think?" I asked. She shot me a questioning glance. "Of the video last night," I clarified.
"Oh, I don't…"
"Come on. Best friends, right? You can talk to me about anything."
"All right. Well, all the faces…and noises. Those kind of weirded me out a little," she admitted, scrunching her nose.
"Don't over think that stuff. Yes, people make noises and you can't really control your expressions, but they're really over exaggerated in movies. What else?"
She asked me a series of more mechanical questions, and I answered each one as best as I could. Granted, sex between a human and a vampire would be much different than two vampires, and that was the only kind of sex I could remember. It's unlikely that I had any sexual experiences as a young Southern girl.
"I don't want to push him farther than he's comfortable, but I think he holds back more than he has to," she said. I knew it wasn't meant to be a complaint, but there was a disappointed edge to her words.
"It's a combination of things," I replied. "He's held out for this long that I think he's become a bit…attached to his purity. It's the one part of himself he doesn't think poorly of."
"I just want him. All of him," she sighed. "Sometimes I'm just desperate for more of an emotional bond, and other times, it's very physical. He overwhelms me."
"Now that part I can understand," I smiled. "That's just the way love works. It's how I feel about Jasper. When we have our quiet – and not so quiet – moments together, I never want him to let me go."
As she lay back on the bed and closed her eyes, I found my place on the other side. She was on her back and I was on my side with my head propped up in my hand. I watched her chest rise and fall with each breath she took, and for a moment, I was sure I understood how Edward felt when faced with her silent mind. I would have liked to know what she was thinking. After twelve minutes of silence, she answered my unspoken question.
"I don't even know what it really feels like to kiss him," she admitted. "He's always so worried about his teeth or losing control. If nothing else, shouldn't he at least kiss me properly?"
She was quiet again, but there wasn't much I could say to comfort her. What? Remind her that he was probably right to be cautious? That wouldn't make her feel any better. It was her blood that called to him, but tasting her kiss would probably make things much more difficult than they already were. Bella had a tendency to be a little overzealous at times. She was a human, and therefore, her behavior was often rash. I loved how passionate she was, and I knew Edward did too, but the entire family had to remember to be careful around Bella.
I joined in her quiet time, closing my eyes and trying to come up with some solution for her. Understanding how sex works would help make her more knowledgeable, but it didn't do much to resolve her current desire to take things to the next level with my brother. I wanted them both to be happy, but I wasn't sure what to do.
However, Bella seemed to have a solution.
The moment she spoke my name, a vision hit me.
Bella asking me to…
"Oh!" I exclaimed in surprise, but the premonition changed immediately. Finally, it became fuzzy, and I had no idea what was going to happen. In the end, Bella decided on her first thought.
"This is totally weird," she began, sitting up on the bed. "And you probably already know, which makes it even more awkward, but…"
"Go on, it's okay, Bella."
After a heavy sigh, she looked me in the eyes and then stared down at the bed. "Since you've had, you know, quite a bit more experience than Edward and I have…umm, I was wondering if you maybe you could…"
When she didn't finish, I asked her to continue. She hesitated, but finally relented.
"Show me how do it – you know, kiss – without messing things up," she muttered. "It's just, maybe if I can stay in control, Edward will trust me, and he'll see that we can do more than the little kisses he gives me."
I drew in a thick, unnecessary breath and let it fill my lungs. Did she really understand what she was asking of me? Would it make things uncomfortable in the future?
What surprised me the most was that I wasn't necessarily opposed to the idea of kissing Bella, I was just concerned about the possible ramifications. Upon further thought, I didn't believe that it could actually be considered cheating. It would be more of a lesson. Although Jasper didn't talk about it much, I knew that his past held an assortment of sexual experiences with both women and men. He was leading a life that was more instinctual and primal back then. What he did was for gratification and domination, not love and affection. Edward would be the biggest opposition. I would have to hide my thoughts from him, at least for the time being.
"Okay," I said with a nod. Bella's eyes shot up to meet mine, and she suddenly looked scared that I had actually agreed.
"How do we, you know, do this?" she asked nervously.
"Well," I said, scooting closer, "I think you need to understand a few things first." She nodded. "You must allow me to be in control. Edward is not exaggerating when he warns you about our teeth. Watch."
I went to my closet and retrieved a scarf. Settling back in front of her, I held it to my mouth and moved it across the edge of my top teeth. A clean line sliced through the fabric. Bella's eyes widened and she nodded again in understanding.
"Just keep your tongue in your mouth as much as possible and don't go too fast. If anything feels off, you have to stop immediately."
She agreed, and with that, I carefully moved closer to her. She shifted so that she was sitting on her knees, and I mirrored her position. Scooting forward, I told her to hold still as I slowly, carefully leaned toward her. After a few moments, my lips pressed against hers, and I was marveling at how warm and pliable they were. It was so different from Jasper.
It began slowly. Our lips moved against one another, opening slightly to wet them and reduce the friction. When I felt familiar and comfortable with her, I allowed my tongue to peak through slightly, sweeping over her bottom lip. I sucked it between mine and was shocked to hear a tiny groan from Bella. Her mouth was opening wider, and I felt her tongue flicker for attention. Instinctively, or at least out of habit, she held it back.
Inching closer, I placed my hands on either side of her face so that I could maintain control of the situation. "Let me lead," I whispered before moving back to the kiss.
Lips parted, I dipped my tongue into her mouth and brushed it against hers. She responded with an appreciative hum and by twitching hers a tiny bit. The more I moved, the more comfortable and responsive she became.
We continued for a few minutes until I knew she understood the proper technique and was doing very well. I didn't notice until we were done that her hands had come to rest on my hips at some point in time.
"You did well," I praised as we separated into our own places on the bed. Her endearing blush graced her cheeks with a lovely shade of crimson. "Do you think you can do that with Edward?"
She said yes, but I became worried by the way she kept brushing her fingers over her lips and licking her teeth. When I asked her if she was all right, she told me that her mouth tingled.
"Oh, that's the venom," I explained. A little bit that way won't hurt. Our cousins have told me as much from their experience with human men. It should wear off soon."
"All right," she said, easily accepting my explanation. When a slight smile curved her lips upward, I had to inquire. "What is it?"
"It feels sort of good," she giggled.
"It's late. You should get to bed. The boys will be home in the morning."
"Thank you, Alice," she said, hugging me before departing for Edward's bedroom.
Edward arrived home in the middle of the night. I saw that he had run ahead of Jasper and Emmett, who would be back just after sunrise. Not long after, a picture formed in my mind. Bella managed to push Edward's boundaries to a new limit. They spent the rest of the nighttime hours making out on his new bed.
Two weeks passed, and Bella was in much better spirits. I knew that Edward had not allowed her to move beyond some heavy duty kissing, but it was enough to sate her need for the time being. Nonetheless, I wasn't surprised when she made the decision to ask me about watching another video. She was curious to understand more, probably in hopes of further progression in her sexual relationship with Edward. Or perhaps she was simply curious and wanted to see more. I knew that pornography served different purposes for different people, and I loved Bella so much that I wanted her to have someone she could feel comfortable with. It's not as though she could talk to her mom or Angela about trying to sleep with her vampire boyfriend.
I agreed, and we waited for another day that the boys were gone and Charlie was out fishing. Carlisle had the day off, so he and Esme were both home, which is why we went to Bella's house. Since Bella didn't have a television in her bedroom, we sat together on the living room sofa.
"I don't know, Alice. What if Charlie comes home? I would die of humiliation."
"Silly, Bella. I'll know if he's coming back," I giggled. That seemed to do the trick.
I decided to try something a little different this time. The last video had been straightforward, with only men and women together. I didn't tell her, but this one involved two women and a man. There would be interaction between the three of them. I was quite curious to see how she would react, and part of that curiosity may have been selfish.
Bella's reactions were very similar to the first time, but she was clearly more accepting of the nudity and unapologetic subject matter. As it moved forward, she became more excited, her heart rate speeding and her arousal growing. When it came to the portion of the movie where the two women interacted, Bella gasped. I knew what was coming next, of course.
She glanced over at me and then back at the television screen. Her eyes continued to dart back and forth until she made her final decision. I knew she wanted to say something, but she didn't. Instead, she moved closer to me, initiating this time as she kissed me.
This was different. This wasn't a lesson anymore. Bella was turned on and was reacting to what the images in the video made her feel. But I didn't protest. I kissed her back, anticipating the moment when she laid down and pulled me with her. Giving in to her desire, we lay side by side on the old sofa.
A tentative hand touched my hip, and when I did not remove it, she slid it up my ribs, stopping just below my armpit. Against my own conscious thought, my chest jutted forward, accepting her attention. She palmed me over my shirt, rubbing, holding, and squeezing. Forgetting everything else and giving into the pure feeling of it, I returned the gesture, but my hand went beneath her tank top.
We experimented that way for several long minutes. This session carried on much longer than the last one had. When she pulled away, I looked at her questioningly, allowing her to lead this little game.
"Ha-have you ever done this before?" she asked timidly.
"Sure," I said, nodding. It was still a little odd, but I obviously wasn't going anywhere.
"Alice, I…I want to know what it feels like."
"What what feels like?" I pressed.
"To be touched," she whispered in response, turning her eyes down to my chin.
Skimming my top hand down her side, I agreed. This would be new territory for me, but I loved Bella too much to deny her. She was my best friend and my sister, and if this would make her happy, I wanted to grant it. I was also just as curious as she was about this new experiment.
My hand continued its path down the outside of Bella's thigh, and I ran it over her bottom briefly. As I moved my fingers forward, her top leg bent and shifted back, giving me access to the juncture of her thighs. I traced a slow line until my hand hovered over the top of her mound. Through her thin gym shorts, I could already feel her heat, and I assumed that she was probably a bit moist as well.
With a firm but gentle touch, I ran my fingers over her clothed sex, as I might do to myself. I ran them up and down, placing more pressure on the places that made her squirm or moan. I was very familiar with all the things that made Jasper tick, but this was completely different. The uncharted territory was exciting and challenging, making it more enticing altogether. I pressed my middle finger against her clit, rubbing fast circles until her breath hitched. Using that as my cue, I slipped my hands under the bottom of her shorts and pushed her panties away. Her flesh was hot and slick, allowing my fingers to slide against it easily as I parted her and moved inside.
Her reaction was so thrilling. It spurred me to move faster, alternating between pumping in and out, then swirling my two fingers inside her. It didn't take very long, which surprised me. Bella's eyes were squeezed shut when she came, her jaw stiff and slightly parted for her to release a squeaky moan. I couldn't help but feel proud.
I had no idea what would happen from there, but Bella was uncharacteristically nonchalant about our private interactions. She kept it all to herself, and I worked extra hard to block those thoughts from Edward.
It happened on three more occasions. Bella really seemed to enjoy the videos, though she no longer asked many questions about their content. The unspoken intention was always there, as each time, we ended up making out as I pleasured her. She put her mouth on my breasts once, but never allowed me to do that to her. I suspected she wanted to save that for Edward.
I now had a strange new understanding of her appeal for Edward. While she was his singer alone, she did smell particularly good to other vampires. More so than most humans. Sharing a few intimate moments with her heightened my appreciation for her natural scent, but there was no danger of me harming her. I knew that if Edward would only trust himself, it could be the same way for him.
That was why I had to stop her the next time we had a "girls' night."
She was touching me for the first time, less hesitant than I would have expected. Her fingers rubbed over the thin denim of my jeans the same way I had done to her that fateful day a few weeks before. As she teased, her other hand was working on the button. Just when she had flicked it open and grasped the zipper, the vision came to me.
I instinctively grabbed her wrists, stilling her movement. "Bella, stop."
"What? I just want to try," she stuttered, attempting to kiss me.
"Give me a minute," I demanded, flipping her off me and back onto the sofa. I stood, fixing my clothes and turning my back to her as more pictures came to me. I ignored Bella's questions while I concentrated.
When it was all over, I took a deep breath and turned to face her again.
"I have to go," I said, leaving no room for discussion in my tone.
"Did I do something wrong?" Bella asked, her confidence beginning to waver.
"No, sweetie. There's just something I need to do." I patted her cheek and smoothed out her shirt. "Stay here. Watch the movie I brought over. I think you'll like it." I said with a wink.
I knew she would like it, in fact.
After setting her up with the movie, I kissed the top of her head and departed. Lingering in the woods a few miles away, I waited for my vision to clear.
Edward coming home early from hunting to surprise Bella.
Edward receiving a surprise of his own when he finds Bella pleasuring herself while watching the movie I left with her.
Bella, with a new confidence, inviting Edward to join her.
He would not deny her this time.
I smiled to myself as I ran toward home... to my Jasper. It was unlikely that the private little dates with my best friend would continue, but they didn't need to anymore. We had both enjoyed them for what they were, and now, she could move forward with Edward the way she desired.
Maybe someday we would play again, but that future had not been decided yet…