Disclaimer: we don't own Naruto or Yu Yu Hakusho (even though we want to :D)
"What?! Are you kidding me?!" the Mazuku and current king of Makai, growled at Koenma in outrage.
"Reikai is in dire need of your services Yusuke," Koenma said calmly through his pacifier as he made a steeple with his hands, elbows resting on his desk. "Please reconsider, we've got no one else who can help us now."
"Screw you Koenma!" he growled, flipping the toddler off. "I've been retired from being Spirit Detective for over three hundred years! And I'm not going to start now, get one of your Ningen detectives to do it!"
"What I'm asking you to do isn't something a normal Ningen could do!" Koenma snapped as he stood up on his chair. "That child is a time bomb for destruction!" he yelled as he pointed to the image of a blonde toddler sleeping soundly in his crib on the floating monitor in front of his desk.
Yusuke looked at the toddler on the screen, taking special notice to the three whisker marks on his cheeks. "A baby Yokai?" he asked disbelievingly. "Ack!" Koenma's stamp suddenly hit his forehead, leaving a red 'approval' stamped on his forehead. He growled. "You asshole!"
Koenma ignored him. "That boy isn't a Yokai. He's Ningen, only a Yokai was sealed into him the day he was born. The nine tailed fox Yokai, Kyuubi. You probably know him."
"Know him?! That damn fox disappeared about a month ago! I had to take his place as King since I was the runner up! If I'd known Kurama was his secretary and advisor, I would've disappeared too! Kurama's a slave driver! I can't even go to the bathroom without him telling me I have a mountain of paperwork to do!" he exclaimed angrily as he rubbed off the stamp on his forehead only to leave a blotchy smudge.
"You're not the only one with paperwork…" Koenma mumbled almost inaudibly then blinked as realization hit him. "Yusuke, if you take this case on you won't have to do any paperwork anymore, plus by the end Kyuubi will have to go back to Makai."
Yusuke grinned. "When do I start?"
Koenma sweatdropped at how easy that was. Only Yusuke would give up being a king just so he could get into a good brawl. "Tonight." Koenma said, mentally congratulating himself. "But remember Yusuke, its been about a hundred years since 'Man's Darkest Hour' so a lot has changed. The Ningenkai you once knew all but disappeared."
"Spare me the lecture, I've gone to Ningenkai a few times before so I know all about the psychic who call themselves ninja." Yusuke said flippantly as he cleaned his ear with his pinky.
"What has Kyuubi been doing the fifty years he's been king of Makai?!" Koenma asked in irritation.
"Why?" Yusuke asked. "I make sure I can sort of pass as a Ningen before going." he mumbled as he looked down as himself. His dark brown hair was back to the length it was when he first awakened his Yokai blood. He also wore no shirt, making his Mazuku markings clearly visible, but they could pass off as tattoos. He wore a pair of green fighting pants and black ninja sandals that Ningens liked wearing nowadays.
"It's not that, in Ningenkai there have been four B class, three A class, and three S class Yokais, including yourself and Kyuubi, who are know to go to Ningenkai! Eight of them have already been sealed into Ningens just so they could protect themselves!" Koenma snapped as Yusuke tried to count how many Yokais that was with his fingers.
"Ten?! Ten high classed Yokais in Ningenkai?! If I could barely defeat Shiguro when I was Ningen, those puny psychics don't stand a chance! The strongest Ningen nowadays could barely make it to a high C-lower B class!" Yusuke exclaimed. "What has Kyuubi been doing?! He should still enforce the law not to got to Ningenkai at full force!"
Koenma gave him a curious look. "But then you wouldn't be able to go to Ningenkai either Yusuke."
Yusuke's face fell. "Oh yeah, that's right…"
"Why do you even go to the Ningen world anymore Yusuke? I had always thought you would have avoided it after Keiko's death…" Koenma asked sympathetically.
Yusuke grinned, though it looked slightly forced. "I go to see how our descendants are doing. You wouldn't believe how my great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-"
"I get how old you are now get on with it!" Koenma yelled, irritated.
Yusuke frowned at him to keep quiet before continuing. "Great-great-great niece looks just like Keiko and her brother looks like my twin or something!" he laughed like he was talking about his own kids again.
"Wow, Yusuke, two hundred years and you still haven't changed a bit."
Yusuke's eyes widened as he turned around to see Keiko standing at the doorway. She looked like when she was still eighteen, with her long brown hair up in a ponytail held by a pale pink silk ribbon and wore a white kimono with pink cherry blossom designs on it.
"Keiko!" he grinned as he ran up and hugged her in his arms, lifting her off the ground because of his height.
"Yusuke!" she gasped. "I…can't… breath…"
"Oops…" he said sheepishly as he put her down. "Forgot about my Yokai strength for a second there…"
She smiled as her feet touched the floor again. "It's good to see you too Yusuke. Now," Before Yusuke had time to register what she was doing he catapulted onto the floor, his cheek stinging like hell. "That's for trying to kill yourself when I died!" she yelled as Yusuke numbly put his hand on his cheek as he stared at her in surprise before he grinned.
"Sorry." he chuckled.
"Sorry?! Is that all you can say?! What about 'I won't do it again Keiko'? At least promise me you won't turn suicidal again!" she scolded angrily.
"Geez, Keiko, I said I was sorry…" Yusuke said, giving her his best puppy dog look.
"Don't give me that look you-you-" Keiko stammered as she struggled to stay angry at that look, but she gave up with a sigh and crouched down to Yusuke on the floor and looked over the red mark on his cheek. "Why do you always have to get into trouble huh?" she grumbled as she stood up again.
"I don't go looking for it anymore!" Yusuke said defensively as he stood up with a goofy grin on his face. "It's just trouble seems to find me wherever I go."
Keiko rolled her eyes. "That's reassuring." she said sarcastically.
"I said I was sorry!" Yusuke defended, but Keiko ignored him. "Hey, but wait a minute… why are you here?" he asked in confusion.
"What? Aren't you glad to see me?" Keiko snapped.
"No, no! Wait-yes! Er, I'm just curious…" Yusuke explained as he nervously put his hands up.
"Hmph, for your information, Yusuke, I'm the new chief Grim Reaper ever since Botan's been too busy training the current Spirit Detectives." Keiko said condescendingly as she crossed her arms.
"Overachiever…" Yusuke snorted.
"Well excuse me! What have you done these past two hundred years?!" Keiko snapped.
"How about becoming the King of Makai?!" Yusuke argued back.
"Hard work that was! You wouldn't even be King of Makai if Kyuubi hadn't disappeared!"
"I'd hate to interrupt this little reunion, but I think we should concentrated on the matter at hand here." Koenma said, cutting into Yusuke's and Keiko's bickering while gesturing to the blond toddler on the screen.
"Oh, right." Keiko said in realization. "Lord Koenma, Botan's report on the spirit detectives' training came in today." She rummaged into her kimono sleeve, taking out a manila envelope and set it on Koenma's desk.
"Thank you Keiko." Koenma said as he opened the envelope and shuffled through the papers.
"I thought we were going to talk about what I was supposed to do about the kid." Yusuke said as he watched the blond toddler turn in his sleep.
"Aw, he's so cute!" Keiko cooed. "What do you think Yusuke? Don't you think those whisker marks just make him adorable?"
Yusuke sweatdropped. "Uh… I-sure..." he said shrugging.
"That's some way to treat your new son Yusuke." Keiko snapped.
Yusuke choked. "W-what?!"
"Part of the mission is to take that boy under your wing." Koenma said as he looked through Botan's report. "Train him with whatever methods you'll think will make him stronger and able to control Kyuubi's power."
"So what about the other eight Yokais?" Yusuke asked.
"Botan says that her team of Spirit Detectives will make sure that the other Yokais aren't going to attack Ningens or that Ningens are going to attack their hosts. They will make sure that the hosts have someone to take care of them and check up on how stable the hosts are every three years. She also says that they've gotten information on two hosts in Raigakure that are already well taken care of, revered to as hero's in their village and don't seem to be a future problem since the Yokais sealed into them were somewhat docile compared to most Yokais. They've also located Sanbi, the Yokai who hasn't been sealed, and he's not a problem unless Ningens wander into his lake which is miles from anywhere Ningens usually travel, but they're still trying to convince him to go back to Makai anyway. Botan also put here that there's a rumor in Sunagakure that there's a Yokai there, but they keep their secrets jealously and the only lead the Spirit Detectives can count on are rumors. Aside from those leads, they haven't found anymore clues as to where the other Yokais were sealed." Koenma said.
"Isn't Reikai all-knowing when it comes to what happens in Ningenkai?" Yusuke asked dumbly.
"Reikai was omnipotent before 'Man's Darkest Hour'." Keiko said in a matter-of-fact way. "Since Lord Koenma had used the Mafukan when he fought Sensui three hundred years ago, two centuries before 'Man's Darkest Hour' when he was intended to, the Mafukan didn't have enough of Koenma's Reiki to completely recreate the world when it was time. Thus that explains the abnormal amount of psychics everywhere and some of the genetic mutations caused by the amount of Reiki in some Ningens. Since the psychics are so large in number and some even as strong as lower B Yokais, they have been able of avoid Reikai's watch without even meaning to. Some psychics have even created jutsus that can prolong their life, which is against the law in Reikai since it usually demands other souls to sustain theirs. Even a Ningen who fails in an attempt at such a jutsu is immediately sent to hell in Reikai without mercy."
Yusuke sweatdropped. "Man, Reikai has become more corrupted since the last time I died…" he said meagerly.
"That last law was placed down by my father for the monstrosity of those jutsu." Koenma said seriously.
"King Yama?!" Yusuke exclaimed in surprise.
"Though I still think there might be a loophole in there somewhere that might cause reason for Reikai to reconsider on that law." Keiko said stubbornly.
Koenma sighed. "Well, so far all those who've tried to prolong their life have all done it with evil intent."
"Those bastards," Yusuke growled. "You mean they kill innocent people just so they can live for a while longer?"
Koenma nodded. "The worst of them are about a handful of people who call themselves the followers of Jashin aka the god of death. They kill people in gruesome rituals which make them immortal, the victims are their sacrifices to their false god. If you ever encounter a Jashinist, I suggest you don't stick around to long Yusuke, because I bet that if a Jashinist wanted to sacrifice you, they'd be able to do it. It's one of the worst jutsus that prolong life because in it's own way it's a recreation of the Orb of Bas."
"Cheery." Yusuke mumbled. "How would you rank a Jashinist anyway?"
"S-rank in the Ningen scale and lower A at most as a Yokai." Koenma said seriously.
Yusuke let out a low whistle. "I'll try to steer clear of Ningens like that, strong Ningens always think I'm going to kill them or something because I mask my Yoki."
"At least you're not an idiot and don't." Keiko said sharply. "Ningens nowadays can sense Yoki a mile away since it's so different from Reiki."
"So that means I can't stay in Blondie's village too long or they'll find me out?" Yusuke asked in slight relief.
"Of course you can't Yusuke, you're obviously a Yokai to anyone who looks closely enough." Koenma said rudely. "You will take Naruto Uzumaki with you to Makai, where you will see to his training until he's six with Keiko giving me monthly reports on his progress. Then the rest of his training will be supervised by you and the Spirit Detectives in Reikai. Once his training is complete, you and Naruto will go back to Konohagakure, the boy's village. You and Keiko will pose as the boy's Ningen parents from then on until it is completely positive his condition is stable. When the boy passes away from natural cause, Keiko will bring the boy to Reikai and you can take Kyuubi back to Makai."
"Uh, question. When Keiko and I pose as Naruto's parents, how will no one suspect me being a Yokai?" Yusuke piped up.
"You won't be able to use your Yoki and pose as a Ningen without a lot Reiki, there are others like that so it wouldn't be completely off." Koenma said.
"What?! What if some of my Yoki just slips?! What do I do then?!" Yusuke snapped in exasperation, but he quickly bit his tongue as he saw Keiko glare at him.
"You obviously don't know the power of seals Ningens have created." Keiko said sharply. "One of the Spirit Detectives Botan helped train is actually a seal master. Before you leave Reikai when Naruto's training is done, he will seal you off from your Yoki so your body will readjust to the way it was before your Yokai blood was awaken, leaving your body to produce a minimal amount of Reiki, just enough so you don't die since after so many years your body can't produce the amount of Reiki it used to since you're not completely human anymore."
"Oh ok." Yusuke said blankly.
"Quit pretending you understand and ask questions if you need to!" Keiko snapped.
Yusuke grinned. "I was kidding! I understand! Geez!"
"Good, because you'll have to remember you won't be able to access your Yoki even if you tried or the consequences could be fatal." Koenma said.
A portal suddenly opened up beside Yusuke, making him jump back in surprise.
"Just in time." Koenma said. "I'd hurry up if I were you Yusuke, you don't want the whole village to know that Naruto's missing until you're already in Makai or else the same thing that happened to Kyuubi will happen to you." he warned.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Yusuke said dismissingly as he walked up to Keiko. "See you in Makai Keiko." he said grinning before kissing her.
"Yeah, well this better not be a goodbye kiss." she said stubbornly and pouted.
Yusuke laughed. "No way! I'm not some cliché romantic! That was Kuwabara's job! 'Yukina! You're eyes shine like gemstones under the moonlight!'" he said, making a good imitation of Kuwabara.
Keiko giggled. "Just don't say that to his face, he was really bummed out when he died without Yukina never really getting that he like her."
"Fine, I'll say it to Hiei, he'd sure get a kick out of it!" Yusuke said and quickly slipped through the portal before Keiko could slap him again.
"Jerk!" Keiko called after him even though he couldn't hear her anymore.
"Yusuke has become more eccentric since the last time we saw him…" Koenma mumbled as they watched the portal wink out from existence.
"That's because he hasn't had me to put him in his place for the past two and a half hundred years." Keiko said obstinately as she crossed her arms.
Koenma smiled deviously. "I almost feel sorry for Yusuke."
"What's that supposed to mean?!" Keiko snapped as she suddenly had her oar in her hand and hit him over the head.
Yusuke fell face first on the floor as the portal flipped him five feet above ground level. He groaned as he flipped over so he was sitting on the floor cross-legged and rubbed his face. As he stood up and dusted himself off, he saw his face imprinted on the dirt and sweatdropped. That was weird… He decided to leave it since it was kind of funny for the next guy who found it and started to climb up the tallest nearby tree. From what he'd learned from the few times he's visited is that Konoha had a giant stone mountain that looked like Mt Rushmore before it was destroyed during 'Man's Darkest Hour', though personally Yusuke liked to call it Apocalypse.
Once he got high enough to over look most of the trees around him, he started to look for a mountain that looked like a weirdo Mt Rushmore. It wasn't that hard to find since Yusuke soon found out he was in a training ground inside the village already. He grinned. At least Koenma wasn't a complete asshole, otherwise he would have transported Yusuke miles from the village. He jumped off the tree, landing on the ground like a cat and ran off toward the village to find Naruto Uzumaki. Correction, Naruto Urameshi.
Mazuku we're pretty sure that's the type of demon Yusuke is… if we're wrong please correct us XP
Makai Demon World
Reikai Spirit World
Ningenkai Human World
'Man's Darkest Hour' basically Apocalypse
Sanbi a three tailed tortoise demon that likes dwelling in lakes and passing off as an island
Reiki spirit energy
Yoki demon energy
Mafukan Koenma's pacifier which gradually stored his Reiki