Doofenshmirtz felt his heart skip a beat as he saw Perry the Platyperson crash through his window. Perry dusted the shards of glass off his fedora, not noticing Doofenshmirtz running towards him at great speed.
"Oh there you are Perry!" you could almost see the love hearts pulsing off his girlish smile. He leapt towards the aloof Perry grinning wildly. But Perry just gripped onto the doctor's wrist and forced him to the ground with a whack.
"o-oooowww…should of seen that coming huh?"
Perry placed the fedora back on his head "old habits die hard." he simply replied.
Doofenshmirtz got up and hung around Perry "hey guess what?"
Perry sighed, finally making eye contact with the eager evil scientist "ugh…what?"
"i-I was watching this show last night and it was really funny with this guy and this other guy and they were in this hospital an-"
"Get to the point."
Doofenshmirtz giggled embarrassed "Sorry Perry, but there was this guy just like you and he even shared the same name as you!"
"…Faaaaaaaaaascinating..(!)" Perry rolled his eyes passing Doofenshmirtz and sat on the sofa.
Doofenshmirtz sat down next to him smiling.
"…call me Diana"
An incredibly awkward silence filled the room and all you could hear was Perry's eye twitching.
"What did you just say you crazed Druselstien lunatic?"
Doofenshmirtz started blushing "c-call me Diana…in the show Perry used to call the guy girl names in a way to diminish him and humiliate him"
Perry smiled at the opportunity to embarrass his nemesis further "ok DIANA, if it'll make ya happy."
Doofenshmirtz smiled happily despite the fact he was now Dr Heinz Diana.
Doofenshmirtz closed his eyes suddenly grew a dark crimson "…t-there's also this thing…t-that guy tries to do…" he snuggled closer to Perry his cheeks burning. Perry raised an eyebrow at the approaching doctor.
He shuffled back tense "what the hell are you doing Diana?" he said putting an emphasis on the H.
Doofenshmirtz kept coming towards him "i-i-I think that he just likes him very much and he keeps trying to…"
The sofa space was slowly running out and Perry was almost leaning into the side, blushing as hard as Doofenshmirtz was "s-seriously Diana b-back off!"
Doofenshmirtz grinned and Perry gritted his teeth. He felt like he was about to scream but he opened his eyes to find Doofenshmirtz only hugging him.
"He tries to hug him!"
Perry's blush darkened "…the guy on that show's an idiot"
Doofenshmirtz looked up at his nemesis blushing face "you're blushing Perry."
Perry pushed him off "shut up Diana"
"Why were you blushing? Did you like i-"
"NO! I'd rather stick pins in my eyes and in my spleen than rather share your loving expressions of stupidity!"
Doofenshmirtz scratched his head and thought hard "…did you think I was gonna do anything else to you?"
A menagerie of dirty thoughts poured into Perry's head and the blush began to burn behind his eyes.
He opened his eyes again to find Doofenshmirtz now lightly kissing his cheek.
Perry blushed again pulling down his fedora "I despise you so much Diana…"