Chapter 1
The Unexpected

* * *

You're a boy.

More specifically, you're a pre-teen teenage boy, about four months from thirteen.

You're also a ninja.

You haven't been one for long, but you've been learning about them for half your life. Finally, you're on a team, you know an awesome jutsu...

And you've invented a technique.

Two, if you count the clone/henge conjugation.

Now, back to the main point--you're a boy. While you're not terribly well versed in the ways of puberty, you are the container of a nine-tailed demon fox. This means you're sort of ahead of everyone else in certain ways, only this has caused you to momentarily halt in your growth spurt. In other words, you're a little vertically challenged.

But that's okay. You're twelve. People say you'll grow into your height eventually, and you will.

The most important thing right now is the fact that you're rather anatomically developed, and you've noticed what happens when you look at the Hokage's nudie magazines--even studying enough to make a technique from it.

Since you used attractive females as models for your 'Sexy no Jutsu', it stands to reason that your Oiroke form is attractive too.

It also stands to reason that you're kind of attracted to her, which is kind of weird, because she's you.

Still, you're a teenage boy. You can experiment.

And that's what starts the whole thing.

* * *

Naruto blinked his eyes open tiredly, memories flicking instantly back into place as he found a familiar naked form next to him. It was really quite squashed--a single bed, and two people? The two facts didn't really compute.

Shoving such meaningless things away from his thoughts, Naruto eyed the distinctly female and chakra-smelling person beside him.

Chakra wasn't the only thing she smelled of.

Simultaneously, Naruto felt proud, satisfied, and disturbed.

A kind of natural reaction for someone who'd just lost their sort-of virginity to themselves.

Does that even count? I mean, isn't it just jerking off, but more complicated?

Naruto pondered this while he nudged his transformed clone awake. There was technically no reason for her to still be here.

"Nrrrn?" The girl groaned questioningly, flicking an eye open.

"Hi. You awake yet?"


"Too bad. You're a clone. That was a really, really awesome trick and you're way better than my right hand, but you still have to go."

There was no point in arguing with this. She was just a clone, after all--a mirror of him, only weaker. His memories and thoughts. It wasn't as though she'd be missing out on anything by dispelling.

So she shrugged, and concentrated on the instinctive notion of returning to the Energy Source, otherwise known as the Chakra Pool of Naruto.

She was really quite surprised when it didn't work.

"...I can't dispel."

"What? Why?"

"I don't know. It's like there's something blocking it."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. It's weird--like there's a barrier between me and the Source."

Naruto pondered for a moment. "Aw, crap. I don't get this. How about I just hit you out?"

"Kay." The clone frowned unwillingly and awaited the punch. "OW!"

"What the fuck?!"

* * *

"Hey, old man!"

The Hokage sighed. "What is it now, Naruto? Where's your team?" he blinked. "Isn't that your female form?"


"She actually has clothes on?"

"That's just henge clothes."

Sarutobi attempted to redirect his train of thought. I am not a pedophile. "Well, anyway. Why aren't you with your team? They should be arriving for a mission soon."

"I've kind of got a problem." Naruto nudged his clone, who smiled sheepishly, the expression full of female youth. "See, this clone won't dispel. I've hit her and everything. She just doesn't go."

The professor in Sarutobi was instantly roused. He looked up with new interest. "She's flesh and blood?"

"Dunno. All I know is that she can take a hit and feel it."

"It fucking hurts." The clone added petulantly.

"Hmm." The Hokage considered it. "You created her normally? The same hand seals? Did you do it any differently at all?"

"Nah. I did just make one clone, though. I normally make loads more."

"Why, in particular, did you decide to create only one, then?"

Naruto blushed. "Well...uh..."

"We'd rather not say." His clone put in helpfully.

"You may have to." The Sandaime warned. "If there's something wrong with your clones, it could have dangerous consequences. Now, what exactly were you doing out of the ordinary?"

Naruto muttered something inaudible.

"What was that?"

"I was experimenting." He repeated, louder, face a very adamant shade of red. The female clone, beside him, was copying this gesture with near identical efficiency.

An eyebrow raised. "Experimenting how?"

"Oh, come on, old man." The female complained. "I'm a teenage boy. Or, at least, I am when I'm not in henge."

"If you could make clones that could turn into hot girls, what would you do?"

The implications sank in quickly. "Ah. That is...most unusual. So you-" Here, he made a gesture that would scar the poor individuals forever. "-To the clone?"

"Yes," Naruto whimpered.

"Well, then." Sarutobi mused, trying and failing to disguise his snickering. "Perhaps some form of integration happened when your chakra 'seeped' into your clone."

Both unfortunate youths cringed, a green tinge giving their already mauve faces a variety of impressive colour.

"Either way, it will have to be examined. To the hospital!"

* * *

After an extended, painful, and repeated analysis, the medic-nins were finally able to relay their findings.

"It seems as though the clone is supporting its own body unconsciously." She explained. "Something is anchoring it down--something that your chakra unconsciously recognizes as needing protection. The ability to take hits is something that I believe can be attributed to your...tenant's...distinctive abilities. The chakra recognizes that the body needs to be protected, and so makes the point of impact capable of withstanding it in retaliation. In all truth, only about sixty percent of your clone is flesh and blood."

Naruto stared, utterly unable to understand any of those words. His clone, Naruko, stood in a similar but more ladylike state.

Sarutobi, however, nodded thoughtfully. "Intriguing. SO, what exactly is it that Naruto's chakra is protecting in such a way?"

"...I'm really not quite sure how to say this." Admitted the poor medic.

"Well, make your best attempt." Sandaime smiled encouragingly, and two genetically identical forms tapped their feet.

"The best way to say it...Uzumaki-san..." She peered at the two (very young) doppelgangers in front of her, and sighed.

Not knowing which one to address, she fixed both of them with a firm stare.

"Congratulations. You're pregnant."