Disclaimer: Yall probably don't remember me but that's ok, I probably don't remember you either. This is the final chapter of my story. If like goodie and if you don't I shall continue to sleep well at night. Enjoy.
(6 years later)
"Girl look at that body
Girl look at that body
Girl look at that body
I work out!"
Luke's strutting his stuff out on the dance floor, flapping his arms in the air, along with lil Lisa. Lisa does the LMFAO dance in her dark red flower girl dress. She's currently doing the sprinkler.
"When I walk in the spot, this is what I see
Everybody stops and they're staring at me"
Lindsay's dancing… or grinding…. Whatever you prefer to call it against Patrick. He's a new guy on the res. He seems to be enjoying himself so… yeah. Blech. I suddenly feel the need to pluck my eyes out.
"Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah!"
"Husband! Get over here and dance with me!" Kimmy calls from the dance floor, wiggling her gorgeous sexy ass to the music.
"Yeah Jerry boy. Get dancing with that sexy fox out on the dancefloor." Paul elbows me playfully, his other arm occupied with Penny's bare shoulder. (They had started dating 2 years ago. You missed out my friend).
"Go out there and shake that ass Thane. Work that ass!" Penny bops up and down, almost losing her (6th?) glass of wine. She cheerfully surveyed the crowded room. "Nathan's bringin down the house! Woooo!" She drunkenly wrapped an arm around Paul's neck. "Take me out back and lets fuck."
Ok time to leave.
"I'm off!" I feel my stomach turn at Paul's leer directed towards the short girl.
Nathan was the DJ for our wedding. Despite being a mathematical genius, he was also quite a DJ.
"I'm sexy and I know it!"
Damn she is so fine.
Reaching out I wrap an arm around her waist, pulling her back flush to my chest.
I'm sexy and I know it!
Oh damn am I sexy.
I am a sexy beast.
In this monstrosity of a dress.
Oh you made it to my wedding. How kind of you.
Oh? What have I been doing for the past 6 years?
Well 4 years ago Jared and I broke up.
Then we got back together again.
Then I went to school in Europe. I'm all techy with computers and photography now.
Then we broke up again.
Then we made up.
Then we broke up again.
Then he proposed.
I said yes.
And now it'll be much harder and more expensive to break up with him so we're going to have to figure out a different way to make this relationship work. Ya know?
Anywho… you wanna know what my dress looks like?
Mom made it.
It's white. For obvious reasons. Yes I'm a virgin! Ha! Bet you didn't think I could hold out for so long well I did and tonight I'm going to have sex!
That's right I said it!
Sex sex sexsexsexsexsexsex. It shall be glorious and it shall be hot!
"I'm sexy and I know it."
Oh goodness he's got a gorgeous voice.
Oops distracted there.
My dress is floor length. I tossed the heels long time ago and I now roam barefoot. There is much poof and floof and lace and sparkles and basically I'm a huge snowball and you know what?
I am still a gorgeous sexy beast!
Well at least a beast of some kind.
So basically the wedding ceremony is done, now we're having our dancing and then we're going on our honeymoon to Canada where we will then have sex!
Liz rushes up to Jared and me.
Awe shucks the song's over.
"I have a question."
"What's up squirt?" Asks Jared.
"What's a bj?"
I glance at Jared in confusion.
"Do you mean a DJ Liz? That's what Nathan is right now. He plays-"
"No!" Liz vigorously shakes her head. "I asked where Luke and Heather were because he promised me the next dance and he isn't here so that means he's breaking a promise!"
For a nine year old she sure knows how to beat around the bush instead of oh I don't know… getting to the freaken point so I could go back to dancing with my sexy gorgeous…..
"And Embry said Heather was out back giving him a bj!"
"Embry told you this?"
"Well no he was muttering it to Leah and Jacob but I heard-"
"He meant a PB&J sandwich Lisa." Jared interjected. "Embry gets his letters mixed up. He's old like that."
Lisa cocked her head to the side. "Oh." She pouted slightly. "Ok. Thanks!" She bounces off.
Sigh to be a child again… ah heck no.
I glance at Jared. "What's a bj? That doesn't make any sense…." Jared has a glint in his eye, grinning wickedly down at me.
"Wait for it…. Wait for it…"
I frown, thinking hard. Bj
"EMBRY! You corrupted my sister you psychotic ninny! I'll hang you! I'll chop your toes off one by one! I'll bury your body in sand and leave your head to be pecked at by sea gulls and hawks! They'll eat your eyeballs and then your tongue and then-!"
A massive amount of white dives under the table after a grinning Embry.
God I love that woman.
Hah done. Forever. Hope you enjoyed my readers. Cheers