Author's Note: Yet another post- ep for "100". This time, it's my take on Dr. Spencer Reid. I hope I got it in character. Let me know what you all think. I love hearing from the readers. As ever, I don't own a thing.
Only the Comfort of a Mother's Arms
His hands tightened around the leather of the steering wheel as he maneuvered his rented car through the darkened streets of the city that allegedly never slept. He shook his head as he mentally reviewed his actions. After all, this shouldn't have hit him as hard as it did. He barely knew Haley Hotchner. But he did know his Unit chief. His former Unit Chief, he silently amended. And when he'd seen Aaron Hotchner's tortured face in what had once been a happy, boisterous home filled with love and laughter, his stomach had rolled. And he'd wanted his mom.
One mad, hastily planned red-eye flight later, here he was. Back in his old hometown. Headed toward a woman that might or might not be coherent enough to remember she had a son. But none of that mattered. Spencer Reid needed to wrap his arms around his mom. He had to assure himself that she was real, living and breathing. As a general rule, he detested human contact. So this overwhelming urge he had was disconcerting to say the least. Maybe it was the knowledge that little Jack Hotchner would never feel the comforting arms of his mom again. Maybe it was the fact that he'd spent most of his adult life trying to ignore the fact that he even had a mother. Whatever it was, he only knew that he needed to see her, the woman that had given him life. And thank her for her sacrifices.
He knew what he was feeling was a natural reaction. This need to reaffirm his connection with his mother was a knee jerk reaction to the events of the last twenty-four hours. But he needed it. Like air and water, he needed it. Soon. Because the demons, his demons, were screaming tonight; their desire to feed almost undeniable. He hoped this would quiet them. Prayed this would silence the deafening pleas humming through his mind. Because he didn't want to go back down that road. Only pain waited at the end of it. The bliss of the needle was fleeting, indeed. After the euphoria and the numbness faded there'd only be bone-crushing pain.
Pulling into the sanitarium's parking lot, he found a parking space quickly. Moments later, he stood in front of his mother's door. Glancing at his watch, he saw that it was just after five in the morning. She'd always been an early riser before. He only prayed that she'd held to form this morning. Raising his hand, he knocked tentatively at her yellow door, his hesitance growing by the second. In only a breath, he watched as the door slowly opened, his mother framed in the opening.
The first thing he noticed was the clarity in her bright blue eyes. She was in there today. If he hadn't known it by her gaze, he'd have heard it in her worried voice as she asked, "Spencer? What are you doing here, son? What's wrong?"
As he heard his mother's voice and realized that it really was his mother staring back at him, Spence sagged against the door frame as he whispered brokenly, "You're here, mom. You're really here."
Wrapping her arms around her lanky son, Diana Reid pulled her trembling son against her. "Spencer, I'm here, son. Tell me what's wrong," Diana ordered.
"I'm okay, Mom. I just needed…I just needed to see you," Reid admitted, burying his face against his mother's neck, inhaling her familiar scent.
"Well, I'm right here," Diana replied softly, stroking her son's back soothingly. "I'll always be here when you need me."
"Thanks, Mom," Spence said, wiping his eyes as he pulled away. "Those were exactly the words that I needed to hear," he said, smiling as his mother slowly closed the door. Perhaps, this idea wasn't as insane as he'd initially thought.