Summary: Rephaim finds it difficult to be so attached to a mortal being.
Warnings: Post-Tempted. Scenes of a sensual nature. AU.
Pairing: Stevie Rae/Rephaim.
Notes: Dedicated to my friend Ashley (ashleyravenmocker). Please be warned that although this is post-Tempted, it is not including the events relating to Zoey and the others. This would be after they had departed the island, with or without ending Kalona.
I sometimes feel inadequate to her. Her face expresses emotions, and they seem to even touch her eyes at times. Mine, I know, do not. If they ever have, I do not remember. Whenever she decides to touch me, I become confused. I do understand the basics of the bond that was formed. I think about her a lot. She's the most complex, dangerous vampyre I have ever encountered. And yet she is the most interesting. Usually I just discard these beings as superficial and crude. Almost as bad as humans. The Red One. Stevie Rae is more powerful than she lets people know. That can be even deadlier than a well-known reputation.
Her expression changes by my flinching. Her hand falls by her side, where it remains.
"I've touched you before, ya know," Stevie Rae's eyes narrow. She seems displeased. But I cannot figure out why she should want to in the first place.
"I do. But this does not make things easier," I try to explain. I am very poor at conversation. Father always said I should try to have better social skills.
Like him, he said.
I never quite got a grip on it.
The Red One steps back from me, and circles the grey stone dais that stands in the center of my odd hiding place. It has worked, her plan to keep me away from people. However lacking any interaction is not healthy for any creature. Once Stevie Rae picked up on this, she had been coming around more often. That is even worse for me. I cannot grow attached to a vampyre, no matter how intuitive and unique she may be. All the same, I do not want our bond to be shattered.
Her face changes again. She seems perplexed by my roundabout answers.
"It has become harder and harder to control myself. I do not trust mortal imprints, and I do not trust 'friendships'." I inform her. "The sensation of you comes to drown me almost every night now. It keeps me from resting."
To my utter shock, this causes Stevie Rae to laugh. It's very light and almost embarrassed. I've seen her express mortification a few times. Still, she isn't as susceptible to it as most mortals. I find this a most wonderful trait.
"I'm sorry," she says breathlessly after her laughing. "But you are gonna have to elaborate for me. What do you mean by sensations?"
Hearing her repeat my phrases makes my insides writhe a little. I was hoping that I would not have to go into depth on this topic.
"That is hard for me to explain."
She walks over to one of the windows, and stares out onto the dark grounds. "Try."
A low hiss escapes my throat and out my beak, but as usual, it does not startle the Red One. Little seems to. I can tell that she will have to know, now that I've brought it to her attention.
"At night I miss your presence the most. And, thinking of you for too long a time leaves me unhinged. Often."
"I still don't see why that would mean I couldn't touch ya. I mean, I mended you. Healed you. Touching your face with my hand should seem simple." her eyes soften. I can tell she is searching for a reaction. But I don't give her one. I never do.
"I told you. It is much too complicated to put into words."
Stevie Rae walks back around the dais, close towards me again. "Just let me. I know bein' imprinted hasn't worked so well for us. But it is still there. And the scary part is, it is way stronger than the one I had with Aphrodite."
"The human?" I ask.
She nods. "That has to mean somethin'."
We fall into silence. These never bother me, and Stevie Rae has grown to accept them when in my presence. I am not a verbal creature by nature. However, she walks even closer so that she is in front of me again, like she had been when she entered earlier. Her hands stretches through the tiny space between us and cups the side of my jaw. She is careful of my beak, which seems sensible. But I oddly find it insulting. I would never use it against her. She is so far from an enemy.
"Is it that terrible?"
Her eyes seem to lighten at my answer. What Stevie Rae does next is far from safe. Any other being, I would have attacked them in a moment. She leans forward, and presses her lips to the edge of my beak. Startled, I fall away from her and issue a guttural hiss. That should strike fear straight through her heart.
She doesn't even blink.
"Rephaim, I know your daddy had to teach you some social skills," she smiles darkly.
I caw and hiss again. "Yesss. I know what a kissss is,"
Her smile falters. "Then why is it so alarming to you?"
"I have never had one before." I feel odd now, and shake my wings out as an excuse not to meet her eyes.
She nods. "I suppose that it could be difficult for you to initiate one. Your beak would hurt someone real bad,"
That wasn't even a possible outcome in my mind, but the Red One has a good point. My beak would slice her skin almost instantly.
"Rephaim." Stevie Rae asks, in a questioning tone, "Those 'sensations' you went on about before, how would you describe them?"
This one, I know. I usually have to skirt around her inquiries. "Sexual."
Her eyes widen to the largest I have ever seen them. "Oh," and suddenly, she can no longer look at me.
"What's wrong? Did I answer unpleasantly?"
Stevie Rae darts away from me, and I feel cruel to advance upon her further.
"It ain't unpleasant. Just…well, have you ever had it before? Like…um," her hands gesture oddly, like what she is trying to explain is so difficult.
It's actually one of the easiest things I've ever heard of.
"Intercourse?" I ask, and her left eye twitches.
"Well, of course not. Mating isn't essential to my kind. At least…that is what I presumed."
"But…your immortal," she shakes her head, tiny blonde ringlets bouncing.
I cannot help to grin. "And so is Father. That doesn't mean much."
"And part bird,"
"And part man. Being a half-breed does not mean I do not have functional organs," I frown.
Stevie Rae snorts, but I can see her face flush. I can feel it from here. "And you can't kiss anyone."
"No, I suppose I cannot."
I turn away from her, angry. I never give into emotions. Usually this is because I find them frivolous to even explore. I am upset now because I know that I can never do certain activities. I had never wanted to. But because of her, suddenly I want to make love and engage in kissing? Father would laugh. And so would my brothers. They would make it a mockery.
She comes up right behind me. I can sense her there. Gently, I can feel her pet my wing, the unbroken one. It isn't unpleasant, but feels so very strange. When this stops, she comes around so that she is standing in front of me once again.
"Look, I didn't mean to upset you, Rephaim. But I ain't trying to hurt you neither. So stop actin like everything I do will end the world."
"It won't." The Red One smiles with an emotion I cannot name. She then grasps my hand and places it on her jaw. It mimics our previous position.
Her face is cold. I am very warmly blooded, most of the time. Her markings are too amazing for actual words. I touch them all on my own. The red stands out against her pale flesh. There could be no other design for such a beautiful face. I can tell Stevie Rae doesn't mind my silent exploration, so I continue. I gently caress the skin and bone beneath her eyes, around her cheeks, and down her narrow jaw line. I save the nose and lips for last. I know that this is because I envy them so much. I never have experienced that either. But losing my beak would be my deepest desire. I can't ever tell her so.
I just grace the bottom of her lip when Stevie Rae decides to move. She had been immobile throughout the entire moment.
"Rephaim…I have to leave soon," her eyes are very solemn.
"I know." My hands are still on her face.
"I do have a way though…that may make your nights easier. Or harder. Depends upon how it goes…" Stevie Rae says, and then sighs. Her soft breath makes my skin itch.
"I don't understand."
"You just have to be up for being touched. A lot." she adds, watching me carefully.
"Yes." I answer. I do want to please her. I don't know how this will, but it is what she desires.
Stevie Rae falls silent. Her eyes rake over my torso, my waist, and further down. She touches my chest and slides her hand over the joints where the feathers connect. Again, this is not unpleasant. Just different. Her other hand pats my beak and then joins the other in caressing my feathers. She is so close to me. Not knowing what else to do, I extend my good wing out and over her. I slide it down her back and leave it resting on her waist.
"Lift your head up," Stevie Rae instructs me. "Make sure your beak is up and away,"
I do as she says. However, I almost drop my jaw and impale her once I feel her cold lips on my throat. She places soft kisses first, which feels like nothing. Just as I wonder if her intensity will increase, it does. Her lips fall harder against my skin. Gently, she bites down and drinks the blood the falls in small, dark teardrops.
"Why? You have said I taste wrong,"
Her head pulls back from the contusion so that we lock eyes. "I've grown to like it, actually," then Stevie Rae returns to her mark.
This actually pleases me in that way I think of when I am alone. The sensation. I have no other phrase for it. Father called it many things. Love. Arousal, that was another one. It feels as though I drank liquid flames and they now reside in my lower abdomen. I have this only for the Red One. She's all that has come to matter. My point in staying on earth at all.
The blood drinking ends shortly. Stevie Rae then takes my hand again, this time placing it over her breast. I understand this, I've seen it done among many species. I press my palm against it gently, and fan my fingers out around it. It has to be the warmest part of her I've ever touched. She kisses my neck again a few times, and then bends to press her lips to the center of my chest. My feathers must scratch her face, but she doesn't seem to really care. When she takes my hand off of her, I actually panic. Had I done something incorrectly? However, she just takes my hand and guides it beneath her dark blue blouse and under her other garments. I have lied. This is even warmer, her bare skin. Surprising myself, I take my other limb and wrap it around her waist. I pull Stevie Rae close my chest. I have never felt so…hungry for her before.
Except at night. But we are deep in the night now, and she is still with me.
My hand fans out and away from her breast, falling down her waist. The other joins it in the same activity. It seems too natural now, for her to be so close. This is despite that I have never craved this sort of contact. Now it is all I will ever want.
She pulls her mouth off of my chest and I am surprised when I start to make sounds. They sound a little like when I hiss. Stevie Rae begins kissing down my chest and stops above my waist.
Shyly, she looks back up at me. "Help."
I am confused before I realize what she means. The base of the organ is covered in the same feathers I have around my body. The rest is left with pale skin. I don't feel ashamed of its hardness or how it now begins to ache. My hands slide back up her waist and to her breasts again. It is one thing that I can do. Tiny sighs escape Stevie Rae's lips and I somehow find them pleasing. But it is her warmth I crave the most.
Her palm slides over my hardened appendage, stimulating all sorts of things I never knew could be awakened within me. That is when she pulls away, and takes me by hand over to an old wooden table. It looks rustic and unstable. I watch as she undoes the button on her black, straight leg pants. She shoves them, along with her undergarments, down to her knees and then sits up on the rickety table. It creaks.
Stevie Rae's face is so heated. I have to touch it, enjoying greatly how it feels against my hand. However, there is even a greater heat issuing from between her tiny, pale legs. She takes me by the wrist and presses my fingers inside of her. At this, I wonder if perhaps my father was not incorrect about physical interactions and intercourse. The feeling of heat is incredible. She sighs into my neck, against the bloodied bruises she had made herself a few moments ago.
"Rephaim…come here," she whispers. Her voice is quite constrained. She takes my erected organ, now reddened with all my blood flowing through it, and pushes it through her.
Hardened gasps of pain escape Stevie Rae, and I go to hold her, perhaps shield her with my wing again. She stops and I wait, halfway sheathed within her. That is when she lets go.
"Go ahead and push, Rephaim. You can now." she smiles, blinking through her pain.
"No, I cannot! I am causing you harm, I cannot hurt you!" I say in an outrage, lightly caressing her cheek.
If we had been doing something else, besides intercourse, she would have laughed at me. I can see it in her eyes.
"It is supposed to be that way, at first. Go ahead,"
I doubt her words. However, I push slowly until I am entirely cased in her overwhelming heat. I have to move now. I've seen it done exactly this way a few times. When I increase my speed, her sounds get louder and more pronounced. I like those the best, so I press even harder inside of her. I know that I am reaching my point of excretion fast, but not as quickly as Stevie Rae. I hold onto the arousal and push deep within her. A wetness dampens me as I pull out from her. Her head falls against my chest. I notice that we are both scarce of breath. I cannot help but embrace Stevie Rae, so I wrap my arms and my good wing around her body.
"Promise me you won't break our bond, Rephaim." her voice is sad. I hate it.
"As long as you promise that I won't hurt you that way anymore," I press her tighter against my feathers.
"Oh, no prob. Easy as pie."
I am used to her nonsensical expressions. They are a part of why I do believe I love her.