A Sword and Some Stars

A/N: Written for lassroyale on LJ as a late birthday present. For her fic All Bets Off, I kinda fell in love with it and told her I was going to have to kidnap her and marry her in Reno. She said she'd go if it was a pirates vs ninjas wedding, and I "gave" her a sword and she "gave" me some shuriken, and then I got an LJ alert a few days ago saying her birthday was coming up, and then real life got in the way in the form of Honors Chemistry and an Algebra test, but then, lo and behold, here we are!

Word count exactly 300.


"Do you, Merlin Emrys, take this pirate to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for best and for worst, for rich and for broke, in combat and in peace, to love and to check, till never do you part?"

"I do."

"And do you, Arthur Pendragon, take this ninja to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, for best and for worst, for rich and for broke, in combat and in peace, to love and to check, till never do you part?"

"I do."

Gwen came up with a large hotel pillow holding a sword and several shuriken, and Morgana stumbled back as Merlin hooked and knotted the sword to the belt on Arthur's pirate costume, letting him do so as well as his intoxicated fingers could manage and only stepping in to slap Arthur's hand away from stroking Merlin's hair.

She luckily had to do no such thing for Merlin when Arthur gently placed the shuriken in the pockets of Merlin's black ninja garb. He just stood there looking at Arthur like he wanted to ravish him right there at the altar.

Once the two were apart again, they gripped each other's forearms as Morgana announced, "I now pronounce you ninjarate and piratenja – you may now eat each other! I mean, kill, er, kiss each other."

From the way Merlin and Arthur wrapped their arms around each other tightly and pillaged and ambushed each other's mouths eagerly, they were taking all of Morgana's suggestions to heart.

After stumbling their way through Reno and finding their hotel and the honeymoon suite in it, it turned out they did.

The next morning, they both woke up hung over and gave each other rather confused smiles, but grinned and went back to their honeymoon, anyway.