A/N: Hello to all, this isn't Mrs Twilight posting, but her lazy older sister who can't be bothered to create her own account. I've never written a fanfic in my life, but I have read quite a few. Anyway, let me know what you all think of this story. Shall I continue or scrap it?
Disclaimer: although I do dream of Edward, I'm not Stephanie Meyer and I don't own jack.
I twirled a breadstick around in my fingers as my siblings and I sat in the cafeteria. I hadn't spoken to Bella in over two weeks now, and I was already feeling symptoms of withdrawal. Was that possible? I was a vampire for crying out loud, and she was just a human girl. I was beyond pathetic, that's what I was.
The babble of noise in the cafeteria faded into meaningless background noise as I attempted, yet again, to read into her thoughts. Futile. Jasper felt the frustration billowing out of me, and shot me an exasperated, long-suffering expression. Bella was speaking to that loathsome moron, Mike Newton. I didn't need Alice's visions to know that if I didn't exercise every iota of self-control I possessed, the useless boy would not live to see another day. Perhaps if I just said hello to her in biology today...my manners have been atrocious. Surely it wouldn't do so much harm if I simply greeted her, would it?
My slight grimace at the thought of this notion did not go unnoticed, nor did the consequences of my faltering resolve. Alice smirked at me. Penny for your thoughts? She thought smugly. Didn't I tell you that you wouldn't be able to do it? It's only a matter of time now... her vision of her and Bella with their arms around each other flashed through her mind.
No. I wouldn't allow myself to destroy her life. She was too precious. Seeing Alice's vision again reminded me of what was at stake. I would not end her life. My resolve hardened again, and her vision disappeared.
"Forget it Alice," I muttered menacingly. Alice sighed and grit her teeth in frustration. You are SUCH a killjoy Edward. But I'll be patient. And she went back to thinking aboutthe Vogue catwalks. If only I could distract myself so easily.
My siblings all heard my teeth snap together sharply when Mike asked Bella to the movies. He would be lucky if my teeth didn't snap together at his throat tonight.
"So I was thinking a bunch of us could go catch a movie this weekend," he said brightly. Then everybody can mysteriously cancel so that it's just you and me, my pet, he leered mentally. He wanted to trick her so that he could be alone with her. The breadstick crumbled to dust in my hands. Rosalie glared at me; the noise had disrupted her musings on her own magnificence. Lovesick fool she sneered in her mind. I ignored her as a waited anxiously for Bella's reply.
Bella smiled at him and replied, "Sure, why not?"
I couldn't help but notice the lack of enthusiasm in her voice, the lack of interest in her expression, but she was too kind to say no to him. Or was my guess incorrect (as usual with her)? Perhaps she indeed did want to accept a date from this idiot. Perhaps she was interested in somebody unavailable. I ground my teeth together as the endless possibilities swirled around in my mind.
"Great, I was thinking we could watch Zombie Weekend, or Car Wipeout, or Ninjas Underground, or..." Newton droned on and on like the self-absorbed fool he was, and failed to notice Bella's eyes glaze over as she struggled to maintain the patient expression on her face. Feeling infuriated, I could only sit there helplessly as Newton schemed to get her alone.
After what felt like an eternity of listening to his mindless drivel boring Bella half to death, the bell rang, signalling the end of lunch and the beginning of biology. I longed to tip Bella off to Newton's nefarious plot, but there were two problems; I couldn't speak to her without ruining her future, and I couldn't reveal that I knew of Newton's plan without revealing what I am. So I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. Another possible solution was "accidentally" hitting the buffoon with my car, but the image of Bella, always caring and selfless, visiting him and fussing over him in the hospital effectively halted my plans. I vaguely registered Alice's confusion at her visions, flashing like strobe lights as each course of action occurred to me, but I didn't have time to acknowledge her before I rushed off to biology as fast as humanly possible.
I was there before Bella and Newton-my thoughts were a ferocious snarl when I thought his name-arrived to the biology classroom. I took my seat and waited for them to arrive. Two minutes later, my throat caught fire, heralding their arrival to the classroom. Newton was still blathering away about the ridiculous movie he had chosen to lure Bella to this weekend. He didn't even ask her what she wanted to see, I thought angrily. I would have never treated her so thoughtlessly, were she ever to agree to grace me with her company. I stopped my line of thought right there. I could not afford to imagine Bella ever wanting to keep my company, I grimly reminded myself as I cut off my air supply.
As Bella stepped through the doorway, she slipped on the water that had been tracked inside from the rain and fell backwards-right into Newton's arms. His ecstatic thoughts barely registered, as two primal instincts roared to life within me. The first was the monster that lusted after her blood; it shrieked and gnashed its teeth in frustration as I denied it the opportunity to drain the sweet blood that was filling the vessels in her face at moment. Swallowing a mouthful of venom, I turned away from them as he helped her upright and dwelled on the second feeling burning in me; if I watched for even a second longer, I would no longer be responsible for my actions, and Newton would be a bloody pile on the floor left for Mr Banner to clean up.
Bella approached our desk steadily and set her things down, ignoring me as studiously as I have been ignoring her for the past fortnight. I fought to regain a composed expression; I was sure that my expression at that point screamed "homicidal maniac". I repressed a sigh and wondered yet again how my life had managed to take such a dramatic turn in three short weeks.
As usual, I ignored Mr Banner's lesson. Today, it was based on the renal system. I knew it inside out, of course, as it was the topic of several past term papers of mine. Instead, I focused on my own plans this weekend.
Tanya, Kate and Irina were planning on visiting us this weekend. Our cousins of sorts often visited us, and I was sure that they wouldn't object to viewing a movie this weekend (particularly Tanya); specifically, the same movie that Bella and Newton would be watching. Of course, I felt a twinge of guilt inside me as I thought of how I would be toying with Tanya's emotions; but that feeling disappeared immediately as Newton's victorious mental gloating assaulted my mind. I had to be there, I reasoned with myself. What if the vile boy tried anything less than chivalrous with her? I fumed at the thought. I wondered briefly how Bella would feel if she saw me with Tanya. Would she be jealous? My lips twitched at the thought and I was filled with warmth for a fraction of a second as I imagined Bella's jealousy, but it was immediately eclipsed with regret; I could not use Tanya so crassly. I felt ashamed of myself for even thinking it, and vowed to myself that I would explain the situation to Tanya fully. I would give her the right to refuse and I would not use her and manipulate her emotions like Newton was planning on doing to Bella.
I tried to convince myself that I was better than him, but as the monster fought and clawed at its chains, I bleakly reminded myself that it was I that was fighting not to kill her. It was I that wanted to drink her blood so badly that it burned. I was the monster, and the monster was me. There was no point in separating myself from the monster, as if it was some entity other than myself. As detestable as Mike Newton was, he, at least, had never entertained the notion of killing Bella.
As I sank further and further into self-loathing, I glanced at Bella; the briefest of looks. I knew then and there that I could not allow her to go to the movies alone with Newton; she was concentrating hard on the lesson, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. She had that crease between the eyebrows, as she often did when she was upset, or worried, or concerned. But she was so warm, so trusting, that she did not even suspect Newton's treachery. I had to be there. I had made up my mind. I wondered what Alice was seeing right now. I was sure it would be a memorable night, at any rate...