Sexual Frustration and Vengeance
"So, you're saying I'm boring?" I stare at my supposed best friend, or if you want to be technical, I glare at him. He's sitting lazily on the sofa opposite of me, the remote in his hand as he flicks through our 1000's of worthless channels. I set my book down on the coffee table with a resounding thump and clear my throat. His green eyes flick towards me and his broad shoulders sag.
"Look, I'm not saying anything. You asked me how Sora and Riku were doing, and I told you what Riku told me," he says as if he hadn't just told me I'm about as boring as my grandparents…and they're dead!
"Oh no Axel, you fully said and I quote 'they are enjoying their fulfilling and adventurous lives while you sit here and vegetate'," I say imitating Axel's voice almost perfectly and if I narrow my eyes anymore they'll close.
"Rox, come on, I do not sound like that! And you're totally blowing my joke out of proportion," he says and turns to look at me, leaving some show about vampires. I'd rant about the stupidity of it, if I wasn't so pissed off at Axel.
"I'm not blowing it out of proportion; I just asked if you're calling me boring. You got defensive," I sniff, crossing my arms over my chest, my left leg crossing over my right thigh. My foot begins to bounce in annoyance, it's a bad habit and Axel's eyes zero in on its movement.
"You're the one getting angry," he says and looks at the T.V, his eyes squint for a moment before he grins. He's probably going to try and come up with a clever topic change but little does he know that I already know what he's going to do before he even does it.
"I like this show," he says, and the sincerity in his voice distracts me for a few moments. He likes Vampire Diaries? Is he serious?
"What?" is all that I can manage to say, the stupidity is too much, even for Axel.
"You've never even seen one episode Roxas, you can't hate the show," he says, thinking he's won but oh no, he hasn't. I'll just play his little game for now. My revenge shall be devastating.
"What is there to see? I know the plot already, human girl falls in love with mysterious dude then oh no, he's a vampire, but wait," I say faking enthusiasm "he's a good vampire so it's okay until a dark past comes out to haunt him and evil vampires are suddenly thrown into the mix and ta-fucking-da, you got your vampire show," I say bitterly and Axel visibly deflates because he can't defend his show that easily. Especially when it's a vampire series.
"Well, you sucked the life right out of it. You sure you aren't a vampire Rox?" he says teasingly, thinking I've totally forgotten his earlier comment but now's the perfect time to bring it back up, so like the bitch I am, I do.
"I can't possibly be a vampire. I'm too boring," I feel like smirking when he shoots me a look, you know the look that says 'for-fuck-sakes'. Little does he know that my revenge has yet to begin.
"Rox, all I meant to say was that you're always inside reading, and have absolutely no sex life. I mean, Zexion has had more sex then you for crying out loud and he works at the Library!" he exclaims then droops his head tiredly and rubs at his eyes. He's about to get up for a nap like he always does at 5:40, but not this time. He's not freaking napping. Wait, this is about my sex life?
"So you're saying I'm a pathetic virgin on top of calling me boring?" I ask and he groans like a ghost with a sore throat.
"Roxas, please…don't start with this conversation," he says and sits up straight, he was slouching before. All his long, awkward limbs that were thrown precariously over the sofa's edge are now collected and he's staring at me seriously.
"Oh no Axel, we're having this conversation," I say stubbornly and stand up from my armchair, my hands fly to my hips and I tap my ever moving foot. I just can't get the damn thing to stay still.
"What do you want me to say? That you've only been in one relationship that barley counted and it was awkward as hell?" and when he says this his eyes widen and I glare so hard I'm pretty sure there's venom or lasers shooting at him.
"Awkward as hell, Axel?" I say calmly, and his eyes keep getting wider and wider.
"No, fuck Roxas I didn't mean anything by it…I mean," I cut him off and stare at him coolly.
"You're saying that I'm not good relationship material?" I ask and he chews on his bottom lip nervously.
"Rox, stop throwing in all this…Dr. Phil mumbo Jumbo," he says grumpily and I can't help it, I laugh.
"What? Do you even know who Dr. Phil is Axel?"
"Well yes…No? You're being all weird and like, I don't know alright! I can't think right now, I'm too tired!" he gets up and I shoot across the living room and push him down onto the sofa.
"We are resolving this now," I hiss and he stares at me, angrily.
"Roxas I don't know what you want!" he says, he sounds whinny and childish. I roll my eyes.
"Just tell me the truth," I say and he sighs, his red un-gelled bangs falling into his eyes.
"You are so boring and sexually frustrated it hurts," he grumbles and I stare at him.
I'm going to say something but our doorbell rings, Axel lets out a sigh of relief and I shoot him a look as I walk to the door. It swings open and lo and behold, Sora bounds in with Riku close behind. They are both completely soaked, and Sora shakes his hair out like a wet dog. I shout out random curses and Riku wrings his hair out and Axel hands him a hair tie.
"Dude, you could have done that outside," Axel says to Riku, pointing at the little puddle of water and the guy just laughs, pushing his damp bangs out of his face and punching Axel's arm in their weird macho muchacho greeting.
This leads to them trying to tackle each other down, and they go off to destroy our apartment. Sora laughs and looks at me, his blue eyes shinning and I have to ask.
"Sora, why the hell are you always so happy?" I hiss and he looks at me, his smile twitching then he shakes his head.
"The exact opposite reason you're always so miserable," he replies, and rocks onto the balls of his feet. He has this horrible look in his eyes like he's going to embarrass me. Like he did at our Semi-Formal in high school, when he screamed at the top of his lungs that I was helplessly in love with Axel, and I ran out of the gym like a bat out of hell. I swallow nervously.
"Care to elaborate?"
"Its cause I have sex," Sora says smartly, and Axel and Riku chose that exact moment to tumble to a stop and they catch the words Sora is spewing like an idiot.
"W-wha…N-no…Sora!" I sputter, Axel's eyes grow wide and Riku erupts into horrible laughter. It's loud and he's almost cackling and with the sheer force of it he bucks Axel off him and grasps at his stomach, he even wheezes.
"It's true," he manages between his crazed giggles, I notice Sora is laughing too but his laughter is muffled by his shirt collar.
"You're so sexually frustrated that you turn all that pent up frustration into anger," Riku says, and he looks at Axel with a pitying look on his face for our best friend.
"And since you're sexually frustrated, Axel must be going into some sort of forced celibacy!" and after that Sora and him can't control themselves because they both start laughing crazily.
"I remember when Axel was like, the king of swing," Riku starts again after regaining composure and Axel's eyes widen and he flies across the living room, tackling Riku into the carpet and shoving his face into it.
"What?" I ask dumbly and Axel smiles faux-innocently.
"Riku, Roxas wouldn't know! He was a loner in high school, he wasn't in the gossip mill," Sora says as if Riku is an idiot. The irony of it is almost too much.
"Sora…Riku," Axel grinds out, his teeth clenching together much to fiercely for whatever expression he's trying to pull off to look friendly. I think he's trying to smile at them but it just looks like he's trying to shit out a boulder.
"Why did you guys even come?" he asks, gripping Riku's hair and tugging his head from out of the plush carpet. Riku's face is flushed and he gasps for air.
"Jeeze, if you didn't want me to say anything you could have jus-mmph," and Riku's face is shoved into the carpet again.
"Well we came to see how you guys were doing, Riku told me Axel was being all emo today because his sex life is growing cob webs" Sora says and Axel glares at Riku and I glare at all of them.
"Why are you all so obsessed with sex?!" I shout and storm off and out of the apartment.
I was going to Naminé's house; surely she wouldn't be so sexually driven or obsessed.
I get there in a little under 20 minutes; I'm knocking so hard I think I dented the maple wood of her front door. It swings open and there's a very disgruntled looking, red nosed Hayner, his dirty blonde hair sticking up everywhere, so much it rivals mine. It looked like he was about to tell off the person at the door until he saw that it was me.
"Roxas! Come in, Nam is just in the kitchen," he says and walks back into the house, I spot his little blanket nest on the couch and the array of tissues by its side. I chuckle and he shoots me a glare over his shoulder.
"How'd you get sick this time?" I ask and plop myself onto the couch beside my other best friend's feet, he curls up and sniffles pathetically.
"I don't even know, I was at work and it was windy out and next thing I know I've got a fucking cold," he grumbles, a cough shaking his frame almost off the couch. Naminé scurries into the living room with a tea cup on a small platter, along with honey and a lemon wedge. She doesn't see me at first, because she's busy feeling Hayner's forehead and being a great girlfriend.
Shit, maybe it wasme in the relationship? Naminé and Hayner seem to have no problem being together, then how come I was such a horrible boyfriend to her? Oh yeah almost forgot, I'm gay.
"Oh Roxas!" she says, finally seeing me and smiles brightly.
"I'm just in the kitchen, we can go in there and let Hayner sleep," she says and scurries off, but not before pecking Hayner on the forehead. I smile and follow after her, giving Hayner a teasing smoochy-lips face.
"Well, what's happened now?" Naminé asks and she sits at her kitchen table, two tea cups already set as I sit across from her.
"I was at the apartment -"
"Like usual," she interrupts and I glare at her, she giggles and rolls her eyes but in Naminé speak that means: Oh shut up and continue.
"Anyways, I was there and Axel called me a pathetic, boring, sexually frustrated virgin, then Riku and Sora dropped by and Riku said something about me being sexually frustrated must mean Axel's sexually frustrated then he was all 'Axel was the king of swing!'" Note that when I quote Riku, I make a stupid voice, dropping my natural pitch and puffing out my chest in a perfect imitation of the stupid platinum haired idiot.
"And you came here because you're confused and need me to clear it up and smack you upside the head?" Naminé says in her sweet voice, taking a sip of her tea and smiling at me. I stare at her and then nod my head.
"That would be nice, except I can do without the smacking, thanks," I smile cheekily at her and she sighs, blowing her bangs out of her eyes and places her hands flat on the table in a dramatic way.
"Axel wants to fuck you," she says bluntly, taking another sip of tea and I swear I could hear Hayner choking from the living room.
"What!" I scream and she begins laughing crazily, tea dribbles down her chin because she failed to swallow her last gulp.
"You're such a blonde Roxas!" she says, completely ignoring the fact that her hair is so blonde it's almost white.
"Please Naminé, elaborate!" I say, my cheeks are redder then the fucking devil's dick and that's only because well…I don't know why.
"Oh please, you known he's been after you since before Semi-Formal! He's been dropping hints like crazy, and about the King of Swing comment? Well, Axel was what you could classify as a whore I guess, but that stopped after Sora told the world you like him at Semi," Naminé sounds so smart sometimes, if I liked women I would totally tap that…Oh God I did not…
"But, if he knows that I like him and he likes me, why hasn't he done anything!" I cry and smack my face into her cool table, they (meaning Sora, Riku and Axel) were right, this sexual frustration was going to kill me. She laughs and pats my blonde spikes.
"Roxas, you aren't the most approachable when it comes to crushes and the like. I was terrified out of my mind when I told you I liked you way back when, I can only imagine how Axel's feeling," she says softly and I rest my cheek against the wood, thinking.
"So, in other words…I have to make the first move?" I groan and she giggles again, I look up to catch the end of her enthusiastic nod.
"You're enjoying this aren't you?" I ask and she begins laughing again
"Oh, fuck yes," she says, and I make note to tell Hayner to stop rubbing off on her…Oh gross, bad choice of words!
"Roxas, what's wrong?" she asks and I notice that I must have made a grossed out face, so I laugh and stand up shaking my head.
"Nothing, nothing, but I've gotta go. You know, loose my virginity and stuff," I say without thinking and I blush crazily when I realize it. Naminé stands and walks me to the door.
"Good luck! Remember, no glove no love!" she says at the door and as I bounce off their porch I hear Hayner scrambling off the couch and towards the door.
"Catch!" he says and I turn just in time to get a condom right smack in the middle of my face.
"GROSS!" I yell but pocket it anyways as I climb into my Smart Car (do not say a fucking word).
When I unlock my front door I realize the apartment is completely silent, the television is on and I can see Axel's fat head silhouetted by the glowing lights. I close the door softly and when he doesn't turn, I realize he must be asleep.
I tip toe into the apartment, taking off my shoes and jacket in the process. It's actually a lot easier since he's asleep. Maybe I can just like, sleep rape him or something?
I have to stifle my laughter as I sneak over to him; his hair when it isn't gelled is actually really long, it's hanging around his shoulders in all its super, bright red glory. He fell asleep sitting, his legs parted slightly and his arms hanging at his sides. It's like God himself is hand delivering him to me. I smirk devilishly as I climb up onto his lap, straddling his skinny thighs.
I watch his face for a moment; he looks almost angelic in his sleep. His features all softened and I smile in spite of myself. He begins to stir at the new weight on his lap and when his eyes slowly open, he kind of jumps back, his hands flying to my hips and squeezing as if he was going to push me off until he realizes it's me.
"R-Roxas?" he asks, voice still husky with sleep and it causes goose bumps to rise all over my flesh as I watch him hungrily. And here I thought this was going to be hard!
"Mmhm," I murmur and bring my face closer to his, he almost goes cross-eyed trying to focus on me. His body is still tense underneath me, so I place my hands on his shoulders and start kneading the flesh between my fingers. A moan slips past his lips and he rolls his shoulders up into my hands, his head dropping onto the back of the couch. God, that moan went straight to my crotch.
His neck is fully exposed now and I bring my lips down and kiss his pulse, trailing kisses up towards his jaw and following the bone all the way to his chin. He jerks up suddenly almost knocking me off his lap and I have to grip his shoulders to keep from falling back.
"Wait…what are you doing?" he asks and eyes me curiously; I roll my eyes and grip his cheeks between my hands.
"What you're too chicken to do," I say and press my lips against his. It takes him a minute or two to respond but when he does it's amazing. His lips press harder against mine and I gasp as the hands that were on my hips slip lower and he gropes my ass. His palms are warm, and that heat just feels so good.
His tongue glides against mine, and it takes my mind off the fact that his lips are a little chapped, but I don't forget to make a mental note of asking him where the fuck the Chap Stick I bought him went.
I suddenly find myself with my back pressed to the couch cushions and Axel's hovering on top of me, his hands on either side of my head as he moves his lips away from mine and down to my neck. He bites and the pain makes me buck up, successfully grinding our hips together in the process. He moans into my neck and I find myself releasing little sounds as well.
It seems that he doesn't like my shirt anymore and he tugs it over my head, ruffling my hair even more. I reach up and remove his because there is no way in hell that I'm going to be naked before him. He seems to catch on and we both dive towards the buttons of each others jeans, we're both laughing and struggling to undo each other's buttons.
It's a tangle of arms and I hear a button pop, realizing it's mine I move my hips up and grind into Axel again, successfully distracting him long enough to undo his pants. The material is sliding off his smooth hips easily and I feel victorious, until one of those warm hands slip into my jeans and he starts palming my cock over my boxers. I arch up off the couch, our warm chests touching as I wrap my arms around his neck.
"Fuck, Axel" I breathe into his ear, my tongue slipping out and I lick the shell of it. His body trembles and soon he's tearing my pants away much like the shirt.
He smirks smugly when he gets them off and tosses them half way across the apartment, I tug on his and he slips them off easily, kicking them away when they get down to his ankles. He presses himself against me and pushes his hips down hard; my back arches so much I think I could have popped a few disks out of place.
"God damn it, Axel stop teasing me please" I grumble and bite his shoulder hard to show him I'm fucking serious. I take it he likes it rough because he groans deep in his throat, and I feel the waist band of my boxers slide over my length. It's a pleasant scraping feeling and the relief of being out of constricting clothes is almost enough to make me cum right then and there.
Axel tugs his off too and he pulls away, I look up at him questioningly and his green eyes finally lock with mine. There are so many emotions swirling in them that it's hard to pick one out.
"Roxas…it's a little late to be asking but…Are you sure?" he says quietly and I nod my head, running my fingers through his soft hair gently.
"I've been sure since freaking High school," I say and he chuckles a little above me.
"Told you you were frustrated" he breathes and I give his hair a hard tug.
"Shut up. I have a condom in my pants" I blurt out and he laughs before pulling away completely. I watch him get off the couch and make his way towards my pants; I follow after him and pick them up before he gets the chance.
"Let's not mess up the couch" I say, quickly grabbing the condom and lacing my fingers through his, pulling him to the room with a lot more urgency then I should have. But fuck, I wanted him now damn it.
When we get to the room he pushes me back onto the bed, he opens his nightstand drawer and pulls out a little tube of hand lotion, squirting a good amount on his fingers and crawling back over me. His skin brushing against mine is probably one of the best things I've felt to date.
His finger slipping into me, on the other hand isn't so great.
"Ugh, bastard" I hiss and he nuzzles his cold nose into my neck in a way that is supposed to be apologetic.
I clench my teeth and stare up at the ceiling, waiting for the stinging to stop. He kisses my chin and I look down at him, his eyes are filled with adoration and I find myself tangling my fingers in his hair again, and pressing my lips to his in a kiss that's a lot different from out first one. This one is slow, yet passionate. It's the perfect way of letting him know that I want this more then anything else right now.
He slips another finger in and I bit down on his bottom lip, pulling a groan from his throat just as he thrusts them in deeper. My hips buck when he presses them against something inside me, the pleasure of it makes my cock twitch and I'm moaning his name like a cheap porno actress.
"F-fuck, do that again" I mumble and he laughs at me. The bitch fucking…ugh never mind.
"In a few" he says and sits up, taking his wonderful fingers with him and I hear the condom wrapper rustling between his fingers. I push myself up and rest on my elbows watching him. The sight of him ripping the wrapper open with his teeth is enough to make me moan. He slips it on with too much ease and practice but I decide to push that into the back of my mind. I'll ask him about that later.
He grips my calves gently and pushes my knees close to my chest, he's watching my face closely and I grip his shoulders. If his scrawny finger hurt, I cannot imagine how this was going to feel.
"Just relax okay, it'll be fine" he says in his smooth voice and I find that my muscles begin to listen to his command. He presses himself against me and I shut my eyes tight, focusing on keeping myself relaxed which is proving to be difficult the deeper he goes. I finally feel his hips press against my ass but the pain hasn't stopped, I know it's not the time but I vaguely wonder is this is how a turkey feels on thanksgiving. He massages my calves and when it all dwindles down to bearable I shift my hips, making him gasp and release my calves as he leans forward and holds himself up over me.
"Ready?" he asks, I notice his arms are quivering slightly and I wrap mine around his neck, kissing him deeply before whispering "ready," against his lips.
He starts a slow rhythm, moving gently against me and I wrap my legs around his waist squeezing him slightly. This sets off a chain reaction because he's pushing harder and deeper and I'm digging my nails so hard into his shoulders I'm sure he's bleeding.
"Mmm fuck, Roxas" he groans, pushing into me so hard the headboard is smacking into the wall, I lift my hips to meet each of his thrusts because I need more fucking contact, the feeling of being filled is addicting.
I start messily kissing his shoulders and biting at his neck, making his pick up the pace. A large hand slides down my thigh and he lifts my leg a little higher up on his waist, gripping it and pushing deeper at the new angle. With this angle comes that beautiful, mind blowing pleasure that his fingers had only given me a taste of before. Now it's at a whole new level, and I'm moving my hips crazily and my legs are twitching with ever thrust Axel gives.
I'm pulling at his hair, my teeth still latched onto his neck as I moan out curses and garbled attempts at his name. He's groaning and every moan of his along with every thrust pushes me closer to the edge. I've usually never found sweat erotic until this moment. With Axel's hard stomach pressing against me, creating friction against my lower half, his skin sticking to me slightly in places. It's all too much and I find myself arching into him, pressing myself flush against him as I cum, the white substance spilling onto his stomach and little onto mine.
"Nngh, fuck…Axel" I cry out and he's pushing harder a few more times, my legs are spasming and his arms are twitching until he finally lets go with a groan and a whisper of my name, his hot breath fanning over my ear and making me sigh contently as we both collapse onto the bed in a sweaty heap. He pulls away long enough to wipe my stomach with a sheet, then plops back down onto me.
"Ax…I love you and all but you weigh like a dead elephant" I wheeze after my post-orgasm high wears off and I realize just how heavy he is.
He rolls off me and stares at me strangely and that's when I realize what I just said.
"Oh, really?" he says and smiles brightly in the dark, I blush and try to scoot away but he's a lot faster. He scoops me up and into his lap, as he sits Indian style on his messy bed.
"Yes" I mumble and hide my face in his neck; he laughs a little before pulling my face away and kissing me softly.
"I love you too, and I take offense at being compared to a dead elephant" he says and I laugh, punching him in the shoulder.
"And I take offense at being called a pathetic, sexually frustrated virgin" I glare and he drops backwards onto the bed with a load, painful groan. Oh I went there…again.
"Please, not this again!" he says and I laugh, sliding off his lap and laying beside him.
"I'll drop it if you do a few things for me" I say into his ear, smiling innocently when he casts a weary glance at me out of the corner of his eye.
"Alright, I'm trapped…what is it?"
"First, take off that gross condom, I hate the colour orange. Second, be my boyfriend, third clean the apartment and fourth…admit Vampire Diaries sucks" I say and smile brightly at him as he rolls his eyes taking off the condom and tying it before tossing it into the garbage by his bed.
"I'm your boyfriend" he says and kisses me, we both laugh
"Fuck, fine I'll clean" he says and rolls his eyes. I smile and cuddle up to him waiting for the fourth and final thing.
"And…" I prompt after a few minutes of silence.
"NEVER!" he shouts and jumps off the bed, running out into the living room.
"Axel!" I whine, I'm too tired to actually move and I have no idea how he has all this energy. Must be those 5:40 naps.
When he comes back, he has a can of coke and his boxers back on, he hands me mine and I slip them on slowly. I can already feel the pain that I'll be in tomorrow.
"Roxas, I'm not going to do it. I've already discarded the hideous condom, agreed to be your boyfriend and I'm going to clean tomorrow. You ask for too much!" he says and plops down beside me, placing his coke on the night stand along with ten other empty cans.
"Fine, you did relieve me of my pathetic virgin status, I guess we're even" I say, yawning and curling against his side my eyes drooping closed as he pulls me closer.
"Yes, we are" he says with a yawn of his own. I smile but it quickly turns into a frown.
"Axel, can you please get a clean blanket from the hall way closet?" I ask and he groans, I feel the vibrations through his chest.
"Axel…you're my boyfriend you have to!" I say, nuzzling my now frozen nose into his neck.
"What have I gotten myself into…" he mumbles, but gets up to get the blanket anyway. I smile at his retreating form and stretch out on the bed.
"And make sure it's not the scratchy one your mom gave you; take the good one from the top shelf, you know the one? I bought it at Pottery Barn! It's waaay in the back!" I call out and I hear him curse as he fumbles around in the dark.
We totally weren't even for what he said earlier, and this was only the beginning of my vengeance.
A/N: Everyone's got atleast ONE in their story list 8D
Yeah, it's a lemon and probably not a very good one xD
But, I just had to! Plus, I wanted to test my funny bone ;D LOL
Alittle funny story, seeing as TCaTR is filled with seriousness D:
and I'm in a good mood...I'm going to stop ranting!
Thanks for reading and Review if you'd like (: