'Til Death Do We Part

Chapter 1: WHAT THE HECK!?

"How long will he be asleep? It's been three days! I don't even sleep that long!"

"Relax, Rukia said to be patient. He'll rise when his body and energy fully recover. He's been through a lot."

"But, we need to know what happened. He was just, just lying there, unconscious. It's amazing that he only used his chakra and none of his reiatsu. He had such a strong level."

'Reiatsu? Is that a type of chakra?' Naruto, who's hearing, smell, and touch were slowly coming back to, was wondering what such a word meant. Then, he began to realize a few other things:

He didn't know where he was.

Complete strangers were talking about a private fight between him and Sasuke.

He could not- in any way, shape, or form- move his own body.

Yep, being royally screwed was his specialty.

"Hm, maybe he's just ignorant of his spiritual power. You were too for quite a while."

"Oh! Shut up! Besides, I wasn't totally- hey. Look at his heartbeat. Sleeping Beauty is finally waking from his slumber."

"One, Sleeping Beauty was a girl. Two, not so fast there Ichigo. He might be mentally conscious, but he can't move. His opponent targeted his pressure points. I had to numb him to take away the pain. Now that he's healed so abnormally fast, the drugs will start wearing off. But what is truly strange is that it almost seems as though his opponent didn't want the kid to be seriously hurt, just wanted him to stop."

"Bravo Renji, I didn't know you had a brain, much less that you can actually function it to say things I've already mentally noted. It's pretty scary."

"Really Ichigo, really? Who's the one who makes all the plans, the strategies and such, hm? Who?"

"Rukia, Uhahara, Yoroichi, or Ishida."

"Touché. But you know, I- oh my, Ichigo, look. His hands are moving."

This was true. While 'Ichigo' and 'Renji' were discussing, whatever it was they were discussing, Naruto began to get nerve responses to his body. Meaning he could move. So, he was trying to do just that by trying to quickly make hand signs to get him the hell out of there. Where ever 'there' was.

Unfortunately, trying was as far as he got.

"Okay Ichigo, I need you to prop him up so we can get his nervous system back online, if it isn't already. We need to speak to him, and in order to do that; we need his mouth to work. But restrain him too, he has a body, so we can't let him loose over the Serengeti. It's been a while since someone with a body has been here. He'll be freaking out."

'Wait… I-I can hear dead people? Oh boy…'

And with that, Naruto proceeded to faint.