Dr. Robotnik and Vector The Crocodile Marry Each Other

By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus

Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: ...Don't you just love junk, crap, filler fanfics Especially when initial crappy ones like this actually get a PROMOTION to being good? And don't you just love when this all ironically adds to the overall word count despite not really being much fun to read...? ...I smell cherry pie. Do you guys smell it?

Waluigi: Smells like your butt, roasting on an open fire.

Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: ... (picks up pencil) You guys enjoy the fanfic. I've got a goose to cook.

Waluigi: Hey wait, what the hell are you doing- no, don't put me in a fanfic with her! NOOOOO!

Disclaimer: Dr. Robotnik's AoStH incarnation belongs to SEGA and DIC. Dr. Robotnik and Vector the Crocodile belong to SEGA and Sonic Team.


Our interesting little story begins on one summer breeze day within the season of Spring, where June just arrived within the time frame for the entire planet. As things were getting hot and starting to bloom, the AoStH incarnation of Dr. Ivo "Eggman" Robotnik, also known as the world's sexiest fat man, and Vector The Crocodile, top detective of the Chaotix Detective Agency and the top manager of Station Square's well renowned Pizza Hut, were but somehow in a garage within the westernmost corner of the gigantic, green land mass. The garage was a plain, old, boring garage.

But that's what made it unique. It was so plain, so unoriginal, and so fucking boring... that it was completely unique. Was it the stereotypical dirtiness that most garages bear to have? Was it the sleek, tender foundations of the construction that was poured into making the garage? Or was it, the fine mastery of making the garage as plain and boring as possible?

But the big catcher was this; neither garage belonged to either Robotnik or Vector. They both just so happen to find it by pure luck, with Robotnik chasing his dunce botsScratch, Grounder, and Coconuts, while Vector was heading back from a pizza delivery up in the northern section of Station Square.

But when the two large, strong characters accidentally bumped into each other within this strange, plain old boring garage, which was carved with red bricks, by the way, the two could not help but stare at each other's eyes. Vector's large, black cartoony eyes, staring longing into Robotnik's red beady eyes of pure evil, hatred, and comical purposes.

Dr. Robotnik massaged his gigantic orange-colored mustache as he poured, winking with both his eyes as he said calmly to Vector, "I love you, Vector."

Vector grinned as he wrapped his right arm around Robotnik, proclaiming as he gave the fat man a thumbs up with a triumphant laugh, "I love you too, Eggman!"

They kissed.

And they lived happily ever after.

OR DID THEY...?


(The Very Next Day)

Dr. Robotnik moaned as he was laying on his old crappy couch, his BEAUTIFUL pingas being erected in the wrong direction. Vector was in the computer room, making some fresh baked egg cookies, despite being a manager for a fast food chain that is known mostly for pizzas. A few seconds later, Robotnik shouted loudly for Vector, being absolutely butt naked, as his clothes accidentally burned, the reason being that they were left on the oven when it was on.

Case in point, Robotnik is a fucking idiot, and I have no idea why Vector is fine living with him.

"You rrrrepulsive rrrrreptilian! Where's my scrrrrumptious egg cookies?" Robotnik barked as he failed to scratch his fat ass, sighing as he fell off his couch, "I need some more fat to help ensure my new latest Egg-O-Matic Fat Master 40287 prrrrograms rrrrright for my domination of Mobius!"

"...Money first, then we can talk about hot sex," Vector snapped back, as he tossed the finished egg cookies like ninja stars at Robotnik, pinning the fat mad scientist to the wall. He grinned and commented, "Hey! Maybe it's a good thing we turned this random garage in the middle of nowhere into our brand new home! HAHAHA!" He fell on the ground, rolling as he laughed.

Robotnik growled angrily, roaring with rage as he pathetically flailed on the wall, "I HATE THAT CROCODILE! I HATE THAT CROCODILE!"


(The Very Next Month)

Vector The Crocodile was doing several punches as Dr. Robotnik came strolling in, wearing some new sunglasses he stole from Shadow The Hedgehog. Vector turned around, seeing Robotnik posing in a sexual way. Vector bursted out in laughter as he pointed at Robotnik.

"Hey Ivo, where did you get those sunglasses At the Fail-O-Poly store!" Vector joked as he slapped his knees, rocking on the floor as he laughed, his eyes rolled backwards as he did the awesome face.

Robotnik fumed as his entire body shook, his whole face turning red as it blew like a whistle, steam coming right out of Robotnik's mouth, big pinkish nose, and ears. "Keep laughing, you wrrretched rrrreptile! I can manage to outdo anyone and anything with these magnificent sunglasses?" He purred, somehow calming down within a few mere seconds as he slowly stroke the sunglasses, shaking his big, beautiful butt at Vector, who continued laughing his head off. "As you can these, these sunglasses make me look a little crooked."

"A little crooked..." Vector snorted as he covered his mouth with his right hand, rolling back his eyes as he snickered, "They're too crooked for your beady red eyes, fat-so!"

Robotnik bellowed like a walrus choking on fish as he lunged at Vector, chocking the humanoid crocodile as he shook his butt with every thrust. Vector gagged, punching Robotnik in the face in an attempt to free himself as the two tumbled down the stairs, causing several bowling balls and bowling pins to fall on them. Why on earth would they have bowling balls and bowling pins in their basement in the first place is perplexing beyond belief, but they were there.

And not a single care was given about the absurdly short word count. Which was, shockingly enough, over one thousand words due to the bizarre description of all of the following. Including this very sentence.

...I'm going too far with this, aren't I? Silly me.