Seeing Souls

(The pink dress: Comfort)

We sat in the same room for the rest of the day. Nurses bustled in and out, and I saw that they would silently swoon over Sasuke until he lifted his head up and looked them in the eye, they'd run away then, screaming bloody murder, and, without hiding it, stare.

But no matter what, his expression was always annoyed. (An expression I had rarely saw.) And I sort of pitied him at that point. All these people were huddling around him, whispering about him, starting rumors without even knowing so much as his name.

I frowned, his eyes flickered towards me and I turned away.

I heard him mutter, "Get the hell away from me." Maybe he was like that because he could read their cliché and dirty thoughts. Maybe he couldn't block them out. Maybe he heard me, and wanted me to stop thinking.

I tried my best not to think about him or the situation. I tried to focus on something in the room, like my dress that laid on the floor. The nurses hadn't bothered to pick it up, seeing that I kicked the chair down twice.

It lay on the floor like a puddle of beautiful white with deep red flecks on it. My eyes hardened for a fraction of a second, contemplating about getting up and stomping it into the white tiles. I blinked and dismissed the thought as soon as it formed words in my head.

Then I just sat there.

I can imagine the facial expression I had; cool and composed was replaced with an pissed beyond relief look, with my lips twitching into a frown every time something moved. I was so touchy, I didn't respond to what the nurses were asking of me.

I felt like I was acting more of a baby than Sasuke, he was just there silently doing what they want him to do before they actually voiced it out to him, just in an annoyed fashion, but regardless, he didn't put up a fight..

I looked at him one time, the doctor had a small flashlight on Sasuke's eyes, checking to make sure everything was alright. I saw his eyes in the intensified light, brilliant in red and I couldn't help but think, can he really see these things? Of course not. Why am I so gullible?

His eye flickered onto me when I thought that, glaring at me and I just blinked. I remember thinking, oh, he just wants the attention. He just wants to push me away with all that shitty talk.

I felt his steely eyes on the side of my face, but I didn't move towards him. I didn't even breathe. I sat there with my hands balled up in fists on the paper sheets, glaring forward at a perky news reporter on the TV.

She had shiny blonde hair, short and in a volumized bob around her. I snickered thinking of all the hairspray and wax she must have put into that. I looked at her clothes, her shirt was low enough to show ample cleavage and I rolled my eyes annoyed. She played an over enthusiastic smile, that made it looked like she'd be in pain if she stopped.

I moved my eyes away from the television and a peculiar looking man came in, he had black hair and odd shaped eyes. He just put up the chair I kicked down, oh the nerve of that guy, and just started asking me stupid questions.

"So, how did you get into the alley?" He positioned his pencil over his clipboard, readily, studiously.

"I was just spacing out, and then he was behind me," I shrugged, that was what happened.

"Did you try to fight back?" His eyes looked deeply into me, and I swore he started to lean closer with intensity, I merely frowned.

"What the hell do you think? I tried. I tried to get him to stop, but he didn't. He was, like, buzzed."

"What did you do?" He looked down at his paper, and I peered over to see the messy doctor scrawl. I couldn't even make out the words.

"Well, I kicked him in the balls and bit him, if that counts for anything," I sighed that part out.

"I see."

"Yeah."

"Are you feeling anything unusual?"

"Nothing but the awkward atmosphere."

His weird eyes glanced up at Sasuke then back at me. He scribbled notes on his clipboard in the illegible doctor script, and left, coming back every half hour with new questions.

The rest of the day at the hospital, at least for me, went like that. I sat there, until a lady with big breasts, my principal, my mentor, came inside, her hazel eyes pissed (and dilated).

She pulled me out of the hospital, away from Sasuke's glaring form, and brought me to her car. She motioned me to go inside and I had. We sat inside, I buckled my seat belt and she left her undone. I raised a brow.

Tsunade-shishou looked at me, and hissed, "What the hell happened to you?"

I looked at the frown on her ruby red lips, and the wrinkles on her forehead, then down and away, "I… a man attempted to rape me in an alley… Sas-…. he saved me." I couldn't say his name, and I still can't.

She frowned, but started driving and spoke, "How could you do something so stupid?" I saw her hands tighten around the wheel, I think I imagined it cracking in half.

"I didn't do it on purpose."

She looked at me with her hazel eyes through the mirror, but I looked away, watching the cars outside, cheering on the raindrops trailing down the window. In a soft voice that she hardly ever uses she quietly asked, "Are you okay?"

"Just dandy."

The car came to a sudden halt. I whipped my head toward the front, and saw that we were in front of a red light, but the force of the stop was a bit exaggerated. I looked at Tsuande-shishou.

She was already looking at me. Her lips were pulled into a scowl, and I wondered, would anyone smile at me today? But no one did. She hissed, "How can you be so nonchalant? Don't treat this like it was no big deal, Sakura." There was an authoritative tinge in her voice, and a hint of hurt, like it had happened to her, but it didn't. There was also some warning there.

Her tone scared me, for once, feeling the severity of the words. The thing was that I wasn't really disturbed by the attempted rape, sure it was traumatizing, but soon it'll be over and done with. I was more disturbed of the damage it had done on Sasuke, whatever the damage was.

I looked down at my bandaged fingers, trying to wait her out. She didn't ask me anymore questions, she just drove me home, where the second the door opened my mother and father embraced me tightly.

My mom was wailing and wailing, and my father was thanking Tsunade-shishou, probably unconsciously attracted to her large… assets, he came to me though, patting my head like I fell and got hurt.

The nonchalant act on his part bothered me. Maybe this was what she was talking about. That that was why she was bothered by me acting cool about it, but the truth was I really didn't care about that. It happened and I'm safe. What's the big deal anymore?

They started at me for a while, expecting me to break into tears over this, but I wasn't really bothered by it. Sure I was bothered at the time, but nothing essentially happened to me. Just a couple of cuts and bruises, and maybe the slight fear of alleyways, but I was fine overall. But not everyone was.

My mom broke back into hysterics, and Tsunade-shishou helped my mom hobble to the couch and my dad fetched them some refreshments.

They left me standing in the front hall, alone. And I couldn't help but mutter a curse. I was being selfish again, thinking, what the hell. I was just nearly raped, and though I'm unaffected, they just leave me here, and comfort my mother. What the hell.

I brushed it off, and treating everything as if it were a normal day, I walked upstairs into my room. I locked the door behind me, turned on the radio where they were playing music without those annoying commercials.

I stripped off my dress, remaining in only a bra and underwear, and laid in my mess of blankets on my bed.

Leaving the radio on low, I shut my eyes, and ushered sleep to overcome me. It did after a while, but the wait was torture. I heard my parents and Tsunade-shishou talk in hushed tones, they were discussing my freedom.

"… shouldn't be left alone…"

"… someone guard her…"

"… pressures at school… no friends…. Sasuke…"

I covered my ears and then fell asleep shortly after that, and in my dreams, I dreamt of those cozy black eyes burst into violent red orbs.

They haunted me, along with the words, "I don't ever want to see you again."

And for the first time in a long time, I didn't want to wake up.

X

Sleep past by all too quickly. I woke up, staring at my obnoxious pink ceiling, feeling the weight of my colorful comforters. I reached my hand out of my warm burrow to hit off the alarm clock. I also groped along my nightstand to turn on the light.

It was dim, but I could see my bandaged hand, and I suddenly felt my aching bruises. I wince, and sit up. The blankets fall off around me, leaving my exposed in my cold room. I blink a couple times, and then get up.

I looked down to see that I was barely wearing anything, but shrug off whatever I had to take a shower. The second I turned the knob, I stepped in despite the cold water.

I shivered under it, but I silently waited for it to reach a blazing warm. It did so in a few seconds, and I stood there, taking my bandages off. They fell onto the wet shower floor with gross splashing noises.

The water between my feet turned red from the blood bleeding out of my cut fingers. I ignored it, watched it swirl into the drain. The water pelted my back like the rain had yesterday, only warmer, scalding.

Red eyes flashed in my mind. I shuddered violently and hit the wall of my shower. I slid down it and curled up in fetal position against it. My lip was trembling.

I felt like I couldn't breathe. I felt like I needed a nice good cry, but I couldn't start it, I didn't have the energy. I sighed and shut my eyes.

I tried to let the water soothe me and relax my tense body, but it kept pelting my cuts and my ears. It hurt,

I started to hallucinate that with each drop of blazing water was an accusing stare of everyone at school. They would blame me for hurting… him. I opened my eyes and looked down.

The swirling red blood was gone. The traces removed, I looked at the drain with half-lidded eyes and hoped that school would be fine.

Of course, the world hates me and nothing seems to go my way.

X

My parents dropped me off at school, both of them, which is totally unusual considering they both work an hour away. They kept stealing glances at me through the mirror. I had tried to ignore them to the best of my ability, because the words reflected in their eyes were shame, hate, stupidity and irresponsible.

I caught my mothers stare once, and she, in a superficial this-is-what-I'm-supposed-to-sound-like voice, she sang, "Honey, are you gonna be okay?"

I wanted to snap back, "I dunno, are you?" but I never said anything, I just grunted and she turned away, to look outside the window.

The second they pulled up at my school, I flung myself out of the car. I don't think I even bothered to close the door. I stumbled up the cement steps of my school, my leg throbbing, and hauled open the large glass entry doors.

I swear the hallways shut up in silence when the door slammed behind me. I played a cheesy smile and waved, "Hey!" I walked through, the crowd seemingly opening up to me. I entertained the idea of me be Moses and parted the red sea.

I blinked and I saw red eyes. The arrogance and false confidence I had only moments ago were washed away and brought back with fear. I stared at my feet, and then I began to hear the whispers.

"I heard she got raped."

"Who the hell cares? She probably has had sex since she was 10."

"How vulgar."

"How disgusting."

"What a slut."

"What a whore."

"What a bitch."

"She went so far to get Sasuke-kun involved."

"He's the real victim here."

"Yeah, have you seen his eyes?"

"I know, they scare the hell out of me too."

"She ruined his reputation."

"Bitch."

"Bitch."

"Bitch."

"bitch."

I felt my body quake. Tears blurred my vision, but I vowed not to let them fall in school. I bit my lip and whipped my head around to the source of the whispers. My peircign green eyes probably stabbed them all in the heart.

I hissed, almost horror movie like, dripping in vengeance and hate, "Will you guys just shut the hell up?"

They didn't. They're chatter probably increased.

I felt such a horrible rage in the pit of my stomach. I let out a scream, just out of stress. I took off my bag in a motion that probably bruised my arms and hurled it at a classroom door. I heard their screams. Overdramatic, unnecessary screams. I yelled again, "SHUT THE HELL UP!"

They only stared.

They all fucking stared.

My chest was heaving, and my head was swirling.

Why had I gotten so mad? Why is there all this rage when I was so indifferent before? When did I get so damn emotional?

I felt people step closer. Their faces all looked the same, superficial and forced. I felt like I heard chants, "Now, now, Sakura… it's alright. It's alright."

I saw a teacher come closer, multiple teachers, male teachers. And I felt my breath catch in my throat. I fell onto the floor, crumpling onto my side staring in front of me, looking at my vigorously twitching hands.

I don't know what just happened. I don't know what I'm feeling. But all I know is that I want something. I want something I probably ruined.

I want those cozy black eyes, the warm smile, and unwavering attention. My heart clenched as I thought of what he would do.

He would pick me up my the shoulders and rest in my his chest. He'd stroke my hair and call me pretty, beautiful, perfect. He rub my back and just hold me tight.

(Was that love?)

But he wasn't. He wouldn't. those times were long from over. He would never be here and I would never be there.

I felt myself slink back into reality and I saw his shoes. I knew all of his shoes, dirty, red converses with a heart on the side. A heart from me. I followed up his leg, his torso and onto his face.

He looked at me, void of anything I could make out of it, and held my glance for a second. Tears pooled and I felt them teetering at the edge of my lids. I even let out a satisfying whine.

He quickly turned his heel and exited the crowd. The disappearing sound of his shoes was all I could hear until they were gone.

I blinked and there were people hovering over me. But I didn't care, a vow I had made so easily was going to be broken. I was going to cry my ugly cry and ruin my tough-as-nails image.

And just when I felt a hot tear roll down my flushed cheeks, a tan hand covered my face. I was lifted off the floor and carried away. I wondered if my weight was a problem, but I ended up hissing, "What the hell?"

A reassuring voice I thought I had broken from called, "Sakura-chan, could you shut up for just a minute? I'm helping you out here!" I knew his playful tone and I even dared to think of a smile in my head.

I heard another voice. A voice I was so jealous of, "Yeah, we just saved you, girl."

I gritted my teeth, and I seethed, "Great, just great."

WOOOO! Update! Wow, I feel like this chapter was kind of just a mush of words, but that's how you feel when you're frustrated right? Well yeah, sorry for taking forever. I'm a busy person. (HAH! What a lie.)

Review please, thaaaaank you for the reviews in the previous chapters as well.

Love,

Blankdreamer